I don't want to give up breastfeeding, but....

During the pregnancy, I barely gained any weight. But since my baby's birth, I gained 20 pounds! I hate myself for it! It's not like I haven't been dieting. As long as I diet, I maintain the weight. It doesn't budge! If I eat a drop off the program, the weight piles up so fast! I'm especially frustrated now because my husband and I took on a weight loss challenge. We both went off carbs and ate only protein and vegetables. I did not even eat fruits, which I love! I cooked the meals. We ate the same food. He lost 18 pounds in one month while I stayed exactly the same. Not a pound!!! What the heck??
Anyone relate? Am I alone?

Replies

  • I'm still fighting with the 20 pounds of baby weight everyone said would vanish magically if I breastfed, my little one just turned two.

    If you're that concerned talk to your OB, (not your GP, they aren't as well versed in postpartum weightloss and dietary needs of breadtfeeding moms) about a diet plan that would help you slim down without affecting your milk, which by the way going no carb very well could have. Be careful, I know it feels terrible not looking like how you wanted to, but your baby has to come first for the time being. Once they're old enough to eat solids and make the eventual switch to plain cows milk then you can go on restrictive diets but right now you're developing your child's nutrition and the more varied you eat the healthier they will be.

    Edited for a word of encouragement: don't worry too much about how you look or what you weigh right now, just enjoy spending time with your kid they're only tiny once. If you feel like you HAVE to get out and work out purchase one of those chest carriers and walk with your baby. Strollers might be more convenient but chest carriers help you burn more, and bond with baby.
  • Shuuma
    Shuuma Posts: 465 Member
    You didn't say how long ago you had your baby, but I'm assuming in the last few months? Hormones suck but, in my opinion, breastfeeding is wonderful for your baby. Your post-pregnancy hormones will level out and you will see those pounds go away again. Just eat sensibly and enough for your milk production. This is a magical time with your new blessing, so I say relax and enjoy the bonding time together. The weight will come off when your body recuperates.
  • lizpitts
    lizpitts Posts: 67 Member
    I don't have any real advice for you as to the weight but I've read that a woman's body will normally hold on to some extra weight for a year after giving birth. The theory is to have enough energy to produce breast milk. Not really sure if this is anecdotal or scientific. I know it sucks to have an extra 20 pounds but I think it's important that you give your baby the best start possible, so I would urge you to continue breastfeeding.

    Your body usually burns extra calories (500/day is average I think) to produce breast milk so it's surprising you aren't losing weight. Have you talked to your doctor about this? Could something else be going on that you are unaware of?
  • wnt2bhlthy4me
    wnt2bhlthy4me Posts: 121 Member
    Nursing your baby is the best thing you can do right now, the weight will come off.
  • If you wean your baby, you will gain WAY MORE weight than you already have. Breastfeeding does not make you gain weight. The reason you aren't losing may be more likely your restricted food intake. Fruits are good for you, eat them!

    The alternative to breastfeeding is giving your baby chemical-ridden formula during her/his formative years, when the body is growing the most.

    Breastfeeding burns up to 500 calories a day, when the baby is exclusively breastfed without any bottles or food supplementation. Once baby is older and eating solids more and more, the calories burned decreases.

    I actually am here b/c after my twins weaned, I gained a ton of weight. I had been using up so many calories by breastfeeding them that I got accustomed to the huge amount of food required to breastfeed twins. As soon as they self-weaned, the weight just came and came. I'm using MFP to help me with my now with portion control.
  • proof
    proof Posts: 5 Member
    If you're concerned I would talk to your OBGYN and maybe get some blood tests done to make sure everything is okay hormone-wise. Sometimes, people get post-partum thyroid issues, especially if you lost a lot of blood during delivery, and that could slow down your metabolism. I'd agree with the other posters about a well balanced diet during breastfeeding, carbs give you much needed energy for producing milk and generally dealing the challenges of a newborn, you do burn around 500 calories from breastfeeding alone.
  • drosebud
    drosebud Posts: 277 Member
    If you wean your baby, you will gain WAY MORE weight than you already have. Breastfeeding does not make you gain weight.

    I couldn't have said it better myself. If you really don't want to give up breastfeeding then please don't just because you think it will help you to lose weight, cos it won't.
  • o0vibeke0o
    o0vibeke0o Posts: 11 Member
    I am currently breastfeeding... my baby is almost two months. I JUST started dieting this week... but I have been playing with my numbers each day and weighing myself to see what works. If you eat to little you store more fat, if you eat to much you won't lose... you should really play with it until you find a calorie amount that works for you.

    I read all these horror stories about breastfeeding and not being able to lose weight. And I agree that breastfeeding is the best food for your baby. I have one that exclusively breast fed, one that was formula fed after two weeks (he was loosing too much weight) and now on my third she is exclusively breast fed. And well I am going to try to continue breastfeeding her, I am morbidly obese (hate how it sounds but I am), and I think that the health benefits of me losing weight are greater then the benefits of her having breast milk. So if it comes to it, I am preparing myself to give up breastfeeding. It's my fault for not being in better shape before having her, it's my fault for not dieting earlier in life. But it is how it is... but I won't give it up without trying, and not until I am in a state of dieting showing that I am trying. Because it is pointless if I give up breastfeeding, and don't lose the weight anyway.

    Anyway, you have to decide what is best. Play around with your numbers. Maybe you just need to find that magic number that will let you lose weight. Drink lots of water (breast milk is 50% water) and include some fat in your diet too.
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    If you really don't want to give up breastfeeding then please don't just because you think it will help you to lose weight, cos it won't.

    ^^^^ this

    I lost weight while breastfeeding. You need to track your calories carefully, leave enough calories to still make enough milk, be sure you're getting all the nutrients your body needs, both to make milk and keep you healthy in the process, and then have a calorie deficit so you're burning more than you eat. Aim for slow and steady fat loss. Don't forget to account for the extra calories you burn breastfeeding, i.e. your daily calorie goal should be higher than for someone who's not breastfeeding. Don't be afraid to eat extra when your baby's going through a growth spurt.

    It is more difficult for some women to lose weight while breastfeeding than others, but if you log all your food (weigh it, don't guesstimate) and stick to your calorie goal, it will happen.
  • Holly_Roman_Empire
    Holly_Roman_Empire Posts: 4,440 Member
    Are you accurately counting calories? If not, start there.

    I don't have a scientific explanation, but some women don't just drop weight while breastfeeding. I was one of them that just stayed the same. Breastfeeding did not make you gain 20 pounds, though. If you quit breastfeeding, you could likely pin down more accurate numbers for calorie burns and intake, but is it really worth it? I would say no.

    Once I decided to stop worrying about weight loss, I started to eat a healthy variety of foods that would benefit my baby the most. I tracked macros instead of calories while pregnant and breastfeeding. I felt that meeting my baby's needs were a greater priority than weight loss. That may be a decision you need to make.
  • unhgoose
    unhgoose Posts: 122 Member
    I never gained a lot with my pregnancies but I couldn't loose weight while BFing and usually gained about 5 pounds over the time that I BFed - 8 months for one and a year for the other. My body likes to hold on to weight while I'm feeding that baby. If I cut my calories at all my supply would drop. So I did my best, I wasn't that comfortable in my body, but it was worth it to me to feed my girls. I worked out the whole time but didn't see any weight loss at all. I was ecstatic when the second I stopped BFing I was able to lose weight successfully. \

    Some women are very lucky and the BFing helps take off the weight. There are a whole lot of other ladies like ourselves though who have the opposite experience. It's frustrating, but the breast milk is so good for our babies and it is such a brief special time (though I'm sure it doesn't feel that way at 2 am). I chalked up having to wait a while to take off the weight as one more motherly sacrifice.
  • rubyted
    rubyted Posts: 21 Member
    6 months of exclusively breastfeeding is worth FAR more than losing weight.

    ……..6 months…that's all it is.

    Don't diet before you start weaning (and even then start very, very slowly as baby still gets most it's nutrition from your milk.) It can affect the quality and supply of your milk and affect baby's health.

    The health of your baby isn't worth losing a few lbs in the next few months……..you have the rest of your life to lose weight. For now enjoy your tiny baby and the fact that you are giving him/her the best possible start in life.

    ETA: I wouldn't suggest actively dieting until baby is 9-12 months, if breastfeeding, though as they gain so much in the first year from breast milk.
  • oiseau17
    oiseau17 Posts: 142 Member
    Check out the book Eat Well, Lose Weight While Breastfeeding. It was recommended to me by La Leche League ladies and was very helpful. I was one of those people who gained weight while breastfeeding (it certainly didn't fall off like it does for some), but now I've lost 80 lbs all while continuing to breastfeed.
  • 19TaraLynn84
    19TaraLynn84 Posts: 739 Member
    I have no scientific evidence to back up what I'm about to say. It is merely my experience.

    I breastfed my 3 oldest children. After each of them, I was able to get down to my pre-pregnancy weight. My last child, I chose not to breastfeed. That was easily one of the worst mistakes I have ever made. Not only for the benefits to her health - pediatrician keeps saying she is underweight - but also because of the weight problem I have now. I didn't just retain all the extra pregnancy weight. I have gained even more. I sincerely believe my choice to not breastfeed had a role in my weight problem.

    Keep nursing your little one. The weight will drop eventually.
  • During the pregnancy, I barely gained any weight. But since my baby's birth, I gained 20 pounds! I hate myself for it! It's not like I haven't been dieting. As long as I diet, I maintain the weight. It doesn't budge! If I eat a drop off the program, the weight piles up so fast! I'm especially frustrated now because my husband and I took on a weight loss challenge. We both went off carbs and ate only protein and vegetables. I did not even eat fruits, which I love! I cooked the meals. We ate the same food. He lost 18 pounds in one month while I stayed exactly the same. Not a pound!!! What the heck??
    Anyone relate? Am I alone?

    I could have posted this myself. I have had 2 babies. Both pregnancies I had a very difficult time gaining weight - gained under 10 pounds with both. For the first month of breastfeeding I ended up well below my pre-pregnancy weight. Then the weight starts packing on. I gained about 25 pounds while breastfeeding with my first, and I've gained 20 pounds with this one in the last 6 weeks. I try to eat healthy foods, but I am hungry all of the time. I know I'm not eating tons of calories, so logically it doesn't make sense when other people seem to have an easier time losing weight while breastfeeding. My OB said she was very similar as well - tough to gain weight while pregnant, but lots of weight gain while breastfeeding. With both, I couldn't lose any weight while breastfeeding, and I wouldn't say that it melted off right after, but it was definitely a lot easier to lose weight once I had weaned. So yes, you are not alone. My plan is to continue to eat healthy and not let the weight gain get to me. I'll still try to lose weight, but breastfeeding is more important than being skinny to me, so I'm not going to compromise my milk supply. And Once I've weaned in about a year, then I'll crack down and really go for the weight loss.
  • victoria_1024
    victoria_1024 Posts: 915 Member
    Don't quit BFing just because of weight loss... there's no guarantee that that will help. I usually have a harder time losing AFTER I wean, although everyone is different. People (most of whom are not BFing) post on here constantly that they are doing everything "right" and not losing, so this could be totally unrelated to BFing. Are you weighing your food and logging consistently? Drinking enough water? Are you working out and logging the exercise calories correctly?

    I agree with previous posts about just focusing on good nutrition while BFing rather than obsessing too much about weight loss. I tried to lose weight when my baby was 5 months old and it was just too much. I worried about my milk supply too much and it was too stressful. He's 14 months now and I started trying to lose weight again once he turned 1 and it's been way less stressful. Plus I don't have to worry about my milk supply so much, even though I'm still nursing.
  • Artaxia
    Artaxia Posts: 185
    I feel your pain.
    I gained 90 lb during my pregnancy. 20 of it dropped off after I had my son. Once I stayed home and breastfed, I gained 20 pounds back. Since then, I have been trying to get the weight off. I've only gotten around 15 pounds off so far. It's tough losing baby weight.
  • Artaxia
    Artaxia Posts: 185
    6 months of exclusively breastfeeding is worth FAR more than losing weight.

    ……..6 months…that's all it is.

    Don't diet before you start weaning (and even then start very, very slowly as baby still gets most it's nutrition from your milk.) It can affect the quality and supply of your milk and affect baby's health.

    The health of your baby isn't worth losing a few lbs in the next few months……..you have the rest of your life to lose weight. For now enjoy your tiny baby and the fact that you are giving him/her the best possible start in life.

    ETA: I wouldn't suggest actively dieting until baby is 9-12 months, if breastfeeding, though as they gain so much in the first year from breast milk.

    I did a little past 6 months. Trust us women, breastmilk is far, far, far better than your 20 lb. It will come off. It just takes time and it's slow. Unless you have a personal trainer every morning. :)
  • iAmErikaP
    iAmErikaP Posts: 16 Member
    You say you cut out carbs and are dieting- as odd as it may sound you may not be eating enough. Focus on getting a well rounded diet with enough calories. Breastfeeding uses a lot of calories. I cut waaay back on my calories (currently BFing a 12 month old) andi am suffering. Hair loss, holding onto plenty of extra lbs, tiredness etc. When I do eat clean and enough calories its a different story. Weightgain included. Right now my caloric intake goal is about 1700 cal before exercise, 1590 after. Try different amounts and see.
  • meritage4
    meritage4 Posts: 1,441 Member
    Stopping breast feeding is not a reversible decision. Weight loss can be postponed.
    Weight loss and breastfeeding are compatible -after baby is older than 6 months and on table food and breast milk.
    Meanwhile-you can start walking with babe.
    Think about what is more worthwhile in the long run-breast feeding or a weight loss challenge with friends?
  • callmestephanie
    callmestephanie Posts: 90 Member
    I literally was about to make a post about this. I'm getting rather discouraged with my own weight loss while breastfeeding. I don't have advice since I'm having the same struggle... but I wanted to give you e-hugs and let you know I'm there with you.
  • Pinkdueces2
    Pinkdueces2 Posts: 48 Member
    I am currently breastfeeding my 10 week old and having a lot of success in weight loss. It is said that every ounce you feed your baby, you burn 20 calories. I am pumping so I know exactly how much milk I am expressing each day. I set mfp to eat 1200 calories per day (I am only 5'2, yours will depend on your own factors) and every ounce that I pump, I add 20 calories as cardio. Normally in a day, I get between 380-500 calories back so I can actually eat between 1580 calories-1700 calories. How many calories are you actually eating each day?
  • mishiwishi
    mishiwishi Posts: 1 Member
    I'm right along with you. I"m not going to give up breastfeeding (5 month old), but my body's so touchy if I don't keep up with the calories and I have to take fenugreek and eat brewers yeast every so often. I always hear my other friends rave about how breastfeeding helped them lose weight but with me it's no bueno. I weighed 169 when I had my baby 5 months ago, now I weigh 189.. I haven't really been dieting, but I don't think I've been eating like a linebacker. It majorly sucks. hugs sent.
    :flowerforyou:
  • Sunbrooke
    Sunbrooke Posts: 632 Member
    I stayed chubby for the 18 months that I breast fed. I was just hungry all of the time, but I ate good nutritious food. When I stopped, the weight came right off. I was thinner than before. Another thing that happened, was my boobs shrank down from a 32 d (before pregnancy), to a 32 b. they were wrinkled and gross. If I laid on my back, they disappeared. I thought they were gone for good. Then about three years later, they came back. Weirdest thing. They look pretty good too.

    If you want to breast feed, hang in there. I take full credit for my son being so good at math; it was my sacrifice and patience. :smile: