To those who have been thin before....

Do you look back at your former thin self and wish you could smack you in the face? I do and here's why... When I weighed 130, I thought I should weigh 120. When I got up to 140 I thought I was a gigantic cow. Anything past 150? Orca whale...

So I look back at photos of me at 130, 140, 150.. heck, even 180... and I think I looked really hot! Why didn't I see it then? I was cute and I rocked my weight. Now at 222 (which is 18 lbs down...) I wanna go back in time and smack skinny me in the face for being so down on myself. It's not worth it!!!

Replies

  • sarahg148
    sarahg148 Posts: 701 Member
    I think it's difficult to see how we really are because we FEEL like we aren't good enough. I've never been skinny skinny...always have been bigger than the average girl...being 5'11'' and having meat on my bones. I never wanted to be rail thin...but just in shape and tight. But I do hear what you're saying. It's like we don't appreciate what we have in the moment....always looking to be better or just never satisfied.
  • I hear you on that desire to smack past self! What was I thinking?

    But I believe in MFP and the social aspect that helps in weight loss for me, so I'll get back there as a much older and wiser self.
  • peachsilver
    peachsilver Posts: 4 Member
    at 18 years old and weighing just 10 stone i thought i was a huge, i hated the way i looked, i remember looking at my much skinner, unhealthy friends and thinking wow. that what i wanna be like, now at 245lbs i want to literally go back in time and strangle that idiot. xx
  • I do, but not for the reason you'd think. I would have smacked myself to knock some sense in me. Sure, I was a size two (this was 10 years ago) but I was in an abusive relationship, I chose to smoke pot and pop pills over eat, and when I did eat I threw it up. I was in no condition to be proud of how I looked or what I was doing to myself. Now that I'm a size 18, I'd rather be happy with who I am than skinny like that again.
  • wonkosane
    wonkosane Posts: 42 Member
    Younger me thinks I'm a middle aged idiot. He would scorn my khakis.
  • techgal128
    techgal128 Posts: 719 Member
    Actually, I loved the way I looked when I was under 200. It was everyone else that thought I was fat. When I was 175, a therapist said that I could obviously lose some weight. When I was 165, I was told I needed to "tone up" by a photographer. When I was 147 I was told by an ex-boyfriend I could stand to lose 5 pounds. Keep in mind, I have a large frame and I'm 5' 10'' so none of those weights are considered to be too much.
  • campdawson
    campdawson Posts: 69 Member
    Never had a problem being overweight until I hit menopause, then the pounds mounted no matter how much effort I put in trying to contain it. I saw a photograph of myself and realized how out of control the situation had gotten--50 pounds overweight by then. This didn't happen overnight; it took 12-15 years to accumulate. Problem is that type of creep doesn't get your attention like a moment frozen in time by way of a photo.
  • firelight4321
    firelight4321 Posts: 60 Member
    I wanna smack myself fer sure, but only for changing my diet. I was quite confident when I was 120-125lbs. I looked great. c:
    Can't wait to get back to that era. On my way!
  • ebayaddict0127
    ebayaddict0127 Posts: 523 Member
    Actually, I loved the way I looked when I was under 200. It was everyone else that thought I was fat. IWhen I was 175, a therapist said that I could obviously lose some weight. When I was 165, I was told I needed to "tone up" by a photographer. When I was 147 I was told by an ex-boyfriend I could stand to lose 5 pounds. Keep in mind, I have a large frame and I'm 5' 10'' so none of those weights are considered to be too much.

    Dang girl. You've been surrounded by some aholes...
  • Susanm1943
    Susanm1943 Posts: 13 Member
    I hear you!! I think of it as "before" & "after." I does feel better to know others feel likewise.
  • techgal128
    techgal128 Posts: 719 Member
    Actually, I loved the way I looked when I was under 200. It was everyone else that thought I was fat. IWhen I was 175, a therapist said that I could obviously lose some weight. When I was 165, I was told I needed to "tone up" by a photographer. When I was 147 I was told by an ex-boyfriend I could stand to lose 5 pounds. Keep in mind, I have a large frame and I'm 5' 10'' so none of those weights are considered to be too much.

    Dang girl. You've been surrounded by some aholes...

    Ha, true. Luckily my current boyfriend is wonderful and loves me no matter what weight I am. When I was at my biggest, I asked him if he wants me to lose weight. This was his response:

    "Yes I do. Not because I don't find you attractive but because you were a much happier person when you were thin. You had more confidence and you seemed to enjoy life a lot more."

    I'm lucky to have him. <3
  • angela828
    angela828 Posts: 498 Member
    when I was thinner, i wasn't healthy. i didn't workout, i ate so-so, and i drank a lot. i didn't take care of myself so regardless of my weight, something was always off anyway.

    i ended up gaining so much weight from this and my HW was around 215-220. i lost 60 pounds for my wedding and got down to 148. i was definitely healthier but no strength. i gained about 20 pounds (mixture of getting married and beginning to do strength training and weights and half marathon training) but now i am strong, fit, and i can use weights and can run lots of miles and have done 2 half marathons and am doing a 3rd in March. i am the healthiest i have ever been at 170 pounds. i do not look 170 pounds and i feel great.

    so sure....... i miss seeing 148 on the scale. and i hope one day i could get down to 150 something again but i LOVE how strong and fit i've become and how far i can run and kicking *kitten* at strength training. so i guess i just miss that artificial number, but i think i love my body more NOW because of much i have achieved and will continue to achieve fitness-wise.
  • SephiraRose
    SephiraRose Posts: 766 Member
    If we could only know then what we know now.
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    I'm totally with you, lol. I always thought I was fat when I was a teen... but really, I wasn't that bad (at least at 17).
  • I completely understand. I'm a *very* small and short person, so when I was 105 I was just "pretty skinny", not emaciated. Now I'm 130. I think becoming a home pastry cook really undermined my desire to stay thin. :) Don't want to get down to 105, I think 115 would be the most weight loss I should do. Not a lot but it's tough when you have to give up all of those croissants and cream puffs. ;) I agree, we should set reasonable standards for ourselves and not worry too much about being thin, just being at a healthy weight.
  • GertrudeHorse
    GertrudeHorse Posts: 646 Member
    I relate to a lot of these comments. I think part of it plays into the "fantasy of being thin" (http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin) and when you get to that weight you realise it hasn't magically solved anything, and maybe you still aren't happy with the *shape* of your body, which largely stays the same no matter what size you are. I also think part of it is because women are especially socialised to feel like we are never good enough, that we should always be smaller or always be more toned, or whatever. We live in a world that scrutinises women's bodies (and yes, men to a lesser extent) so we grow up apply that ridiculous scrutiny to our own bodies and very often miss the big picture (which is that we are fabulous!).
  • AmyZ46
    AmyZ46 Posts: 694 Member
    My lowest weight I remember ( before becoming huge ) was 132 at age 17 . I remember I was on a diet because I wanted to weigh 125 . I hated the back fat that I had behind my ribs hahaha. I had no idea what back fat was at the time until I weighed 270 !

    yes, I wish I could go back and pop myself on the forehead . I looked so thin , when I look at the picture taken just around my 17th birthday I remember when my friend took it I crossed my arms in front of my tummy bacause I thought I had a big tummy lol
  • AlongCame_Molly
    AlongCame_Molly Posts: 2,835 Member
    Oh absolutely! Especially since I spent all those skinny years hating my body and thinking I was fat! What an idiot.
  • BigBrunette
    BigBrunette Posts: 1,543 Member
    I often wish I had my 26-year-old body to go with my 46-year-old confidence and wisdom. But, alas, I'm learning to be happy right where I am.
  • RockWarrior84
    RockWarrior84 Posts: 840 Member
    I am not so sure. I had a ton of fun in college. Would i sacrifice all those fun drunk nights? I am not so sure, I am not one to live with regrets. My life is good I think i might have changed a few things but not slap myself.
  • scottkjar
    scottkjar Posts: 346 Member
    Huh. All of you who thought you were fat? I never thought that I was fat until I was Obese Phase II. Nonetheless, I would smack the skinny me around and tell me not to let myself get fat!
  • PHr34k0wt
    PHr34k0wt Posts: 218 Member
    I struggle with this. When I was in high school at 120lbs I felt soft and yucky (I probably was, my weight loss was very unhealthy), I went on a weight gaining rampage and ended up at 180.
    The whole time I was trying to lose weight, i just kept thinking about how "small" i was in highschool, and how i didn't apprechiate it. Now I'm back down to 125lbs, and still thinking back on my "small" body. I'm easily the same size, if not actually smaller now due to muscle gain.
    stupid brain.


    I'm 5'6"
  • bwogilvie
    bwogilvie Posts: 2,130 Member
    I'd like to smack my teenaged self for spending so much time in front of the TV snacking. I was fairly active (hiking, backpacking, walking), but you can't outrun a bad diet....

    And then I'd like to smack my 29-40-year-old selves for slowly putting on (at the rate of 6 lb./year) all the weight I took off during grad school, and then a little more. If I had known then what I know now....

    But regret isn't much help, and frankly, if I had a time machine I'd be doing stuff that was a lot more fun than smacking my former self, like finding out if it really is against the time-traveling rules to kill Hitler.