"When are you due?" Im not pregnant you jerk

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  • JAllen32
    JAllen32 Posts: 991 Member
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    I had a super smart girl ask me when I was due while I was pushing my week old daughter in a stroller. Farking genius.

    I said "Last week." And pointed at my daughter. That's when someone else jumped in and changed the subject. LOL!!
  • becajb
    becajb Posts: 50
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    Belly fat seems to be the last to go for many women. I have a theory that way back in our evolutionary history, it served a purpose. (Extra protection for the womb? A last reserve in case of famine?) Don't know if it's true, but it makes me feel better that maybe it's so hard to lose because I'm fighting evolution.

    I love this theory.

    I first had someone ask when I was due at age 15. I am now almost 30 and although I have tried I am not pregnant yet.

    Its hard to field that question when I so desperately want to be pregnant and am not. I never know if I should punch them in the face or cry. Most of the time I manage an awkward smile and get out of there as fast as possible.
  • dbanks80
    dbanks80 Posts: 3,685 Member
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    My really good friend at work has been trying for her second child. She never lost the weight with the first child and I noticed lately that her stomach seemed bigger than usual. I NEVER asked her if she was pregnant. I just waited until she announced it on her own! Nothing worse than someone asking you if your pregnant and you're not!!!
  • becajb
    becajb Posts: 50
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    I have a puffy winter coat with a belt that cinches around the middle. Beautiful coat, and so warm, but makes me look about 5 or 6 months pregnant due to the puffiness and cinching. I never paid attention to it, until one day last winter, when I was on the subway. It was jampacked, and we're squeezed in like sardines. From across the car I become aware that pretty much everyone is staring at me, then looking at this woman across the way who is pointing at me and waving her arms. So I remove my headphones and nod her way, only to have her offer me her seat. Totally confused I say "no thanks, I'm fine standing". "No," she says, "you're pregnant. Getting jostled around like this isn't good for you or the little munchkin." "No, thanks, I'm fine," I say again. To which yells, because... across the car and all, "no really, please take my seat! I insist! You are pretty far along aren't you?! Not long now!" So I say "No thanks, I'm not pregnant." To which she says, "No need to be shy, you're pregnant, it's obvious!" Finally, I said "Lady, I'm not pregnant, just fat" and smiled broadly. Shocked silence in the car, and then applause by two women near the door. The mortification and blushing alone was worth the public shaming of being called out on your "baby bump" in public. I highly recommend using that line.

    thank you for this hilarious story lol. And well done you for calling it right then and there
  • Heliconia
    Heliconia Posts: 166 Member
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    I have only lost 15 pounds out of the 40 I want to lose, but my stomach is not as hard feeling as it used to be. It has more of a jello wiggly feel. It feels softer. It doesn't really seem any smaller. Can anyone relate or have any thoughts?
  • 1991court
    1991court Posts: 230 Member
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    OMG I HEAR Ya!! Dead serious a Labor and Delivery nurse said to me in October "It looks like I will be seeing you soon, when are you due?" I mean come on!!!
  • CarolinkaCjj
    CarolinkaCjj Posts: 622 Member
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    Seems like such a simple rule - never ask someone if they are pregnant, just let them tell you. I have noticed when a woman I know gained weight around her middle and sported a super thick head of hair but did not dream of asking, let alone a stranger.
  • dannatona
    dannatona Posts: 101 Member
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    I was hanging out with my friend (who IS clearly 5 months preggo) and maybe 20 mins of me asking her if strangers ask how far along she is someone asks. She told the olden gentleman that she wasn't pregnant, and his face just dropped. I don't know if I've ever seen someone look so embarrassed, I found it hilarious and I'm for sure going to be doing that if I'm ever blessed with a baby.
  • tapirfrog
    tapirfrog Posts: 616 Member
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    I think it was Dave Barry who said "Do not ask if a woman is pregnant unless there is a baby emerging from her at that moment."
  • Natmarie73
    Natmarie73 Posts: 287 Member
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    I think it was Dave Barry who said "Do not ask if a woman is pregnant unless there is a baby emerging from her at that moment."

    Ha ha you beat me to it!
  • BreatheAshley
    BreatheAshley Posts: 130 Member
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    Story of my life.
  • Gidzmo
    Gidzmo Posts: 904 Member
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    Note to others: Never, I repeat NEVER ask a woman when she is due unless you KNOW she is pregnant. End of story!

    Ok, vent over, lol, but seriously....Im a fairly tall woman, almost 5'10, and unfortunately I carry most of my excess weight right where I dont want it...right around my lower ab section and hips....Ive always been "curvy" with a small waist and large hips...its just my shape and that cannot be changed...but whats up with my belly?! I cant tell you how long Ive had the pregnant appearance! Certainly long after my 3 children have come along (24, 16 and 12) ....am I just destined to have a preggo belly forever? Ive lost 5 lbs so far and Im so proud of myself :o) however....it sure as hell didnt come off my stomach! LOL...not really sure where it came off of....

    Hang in there, and congrats on the five pounds! (and yes, I've had people ask me if I was pregnant)
  • VictoriasImage77
    VictoriasImage77 Posts: 18 Member
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    I feel ya. I put on about 70 lbs shortly after high school (and 50 more since). I ran into someone the following year in a public place and they looked at me and carried on excitedly about me expecting, and wondered how far along I was. I was so embarrassed both for myself and for them, that my answer was, "Oh, 6 months..give or take." To this day I have no children, and I sincerely hope I never run into them again and have to explain that one!
  • Serenitynow29
    Serenitynow29 Posts: 119 Member
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    Weird. I've done the opposite. I thought a woman had gotten fat, no I didn't say it her, and when I asked a mutual what happened to her, the mutual started laughing. She told the woman and she sweetly said, you thought I just let myself go, I'm pregnant.

    I say nothing to no one when anyone gets fat anymore. They may actually be pregnant.
  • Brenda_Pancakes
    Brenda_Pancakes Posts: 288 Member
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    Baaahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa! I love these. I'm also one that when I get heavy - it hits the mid section pretty hard.

    Funniest thing that ever happened was I went out to dinner with my boyfriend (now husband and father of my unborn child), and I wore one of those empress waist dresses and it was kinda poofy in the front. I'll admit it; I was a bit heavier and it probably did look like I was pregnant... So while waiting to be seated; a nice older lady walked by me and very sweetly asked me "What was I having?".

    My response: "I dunno, we haven't gotten to see a menu yet".

    And then we both looked down, realized WHAT she was actually asking, and she booked it to the bathroom after whispering "oh, sorry...".

    Ahahaha.... It's cool. I was quite the fatty. I find it really funny now.
  • lattarulol
    lattarulol Posts: 123 Member
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    I don't know if this will make you feel any better (probably not) but I am currently 20 lbs lighter than I have EVER been in my life (including teen years). I have two kids (the youngest will be two in a few months) and if I so much as eat an extra pancake I look about 5 months pregnant and have been asked that on numerous occasions. I was never asked that before having kids. Some things are just never the same....my belly and jumping on a trampoline......<sigh>
  • jennifries227
    jennifries227 Posts: 113 Member
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    Shortly after my friend had her last child I went to visit her. I hadn't seen her or her other children for a while because I live in another state now. First thing her oldest daughter asks? "When are you going to have a baby?"
    I had to explain that when kids and grownups didn't eat their vegetables and didn't go out and play often enough they got fat and looked pregnant. Not totally elegant, but it worked.
    My poor friend was so mortified. I thought it was pretty funny.

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