Needing encouragment

sltaylor94
sltaylor94 Posts: 60
in Introduce Yourself
I am only 19 years old. I weigh 289 pounds. I have a BMI of 42. I am sick and tired of feeling sick and tired.
I dont ever hold myself accountable and I always give up.
I read success stories over and over and say "thats going to be me" but when I dont see results right away I just give up.

My first big goal was to give up soda. And goodness was that difficult. I completely cut out soda but switched to sweet tea. So I have gotten rid of one huge negative and replaced it with something just as bad.

I just cant figure out how I let my life go at such a young age.
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Replies

  • RamonaFr
    RamonaFr Posts: 112
    You are young, which is an advantage. If it takes you two or three years to lose weight and become more healthy, you'll still have lots of years left after that to enjoy life more and more.

    It helps me to learn more and more about nutrition and healthy living. I like to get online every day and read something helpful that keeps my mind on track. And the best thing of all is to honestly record every single bite I eat. If you start recording everything you eat, without judgement or self-criticism, you'll start seeing areas where you can make improvement, and you'll start making little decisions that help you head in the right direction. It's a long process, so take it easy, make some kind of improvement every day, and eventually you'll get where you want to be.

    Btw, I've been drinking diet soda for more than 40 years. It tastes better than the sugary stuff to me. And when I have a sweet craving, a diet soda helps take it away.
  • sltaylor94
    sltaylor94 Posts: 60
    Ramona, I crave a soda alllll the time. Especially at work because I get it for free and I have such easy access to it. But I am afraid that If I drink one, I will just go back and I am so proud of myself for being off for almost four months now that I want to continue with that. Now if I could only let go of sweet tea..

    I do like the idea of getting on to read something about nutrition everyday. I am always looking at exercises and clean eating menus on pinterest. I just recently discovered this part of the website and how beneficial it can be to have friends on here. I have alwayhs kept mine closed because I was so embarassed about my weight that I didnt want anyone else seeing it.
  • jennifries227
    jennifries227 Posts: 113 Member
    Don't be embarrassed! We're all here for a reason. The great thing I've found with the forums is you can find people in various stages of success and find out what they're doing.

    Have you tried sweetening your tea with something like Splenda? You might also try drinking seltzer water for the fizzy goodness.

    Being sick and tired of being sick and tired is an excellent start. I recently spent 3 months sick with asthma-related illnesses, and ended up in the hospital for a couple days. It scared me and I realized I really, REALLY needed to start taking better care of myself. Frustration and fear are both powerful motivators. Try to remember how horrible it is to feel fat and unhealthy all the time the next time you get impatient.

    And remember, it takes time, but it's worth it in the end.
  • sltaylor94
    sltaylor94 Posts: 60
    I have heard that splenda contains harmful ingredients so I figured if I was going to put something bad in my body it might as wekk be the real thing.
  • jennifries227
    jennifries227 Posts: 113 Member
    There are always conflicting reports on stuff like that. To me, with no science to back this up, drinking something free of calories but might contain a tiny fraction of a potentially harmful chemical is still better than drinking something that is loaded with empty calories and provides absolutely no nutritional value in the form I am consuming it in.

    Just remember, apple seeds contain cyanide, but they're still safe to eat. Just don't pig out.

    You might also look at the success stories board for inspiration. I love the ones with pictures.
  • sltaylor94
    sltaylor94 Posts: 60
    Yeah I just read my first success story and I wanted to get up and start taking my before pictures haha
  • jennifries227
    jennifries227 Posts: 113 Member
    Go do it!
  • BlanketII
    BlanketII Posts: 11
    Hi. I think you're doing well to acknowledge you want to make changes and to stick to the things you've already set your mind to do (albeit difficult!). You should praise yourself for what you have already achieved.

    I am looking to lose weight too and only joined here about a week ago after someone on a different forum recommended it. I have found it REALLY helpful to record what I eat and to be honest, I had NO IDEA that all the little bits of exercise I am now fitting into my day makes a real difference. It's been really helpful to track what I've eaten on different days to try and work out better combinations of food to stay within a reduced calorie intake.

    One thing I would say though is that you seem really down on yourself at the moment. But life is much broader than whether you're overweight or not. I have failed at losing weight before as it was my ONLY goal and like you if I had a minor set back or I didn't see drastic results I would give up and eat some chocolate. A short term solution to feeling better! Could you try and do two things?:
    1. Find a bit of your body that you LOVE and pamper it, e.g. you've got great lips so buy the newest lippie you've felt you didn't deserve. Or you have sexy hips so buy yourself a new belt so you can show them off a bit. Remember no-one else will see you as just "overweight", if you are confident that will shine through much more than being overweight or skinny.
    2. Find another goal you can think about too. This could be work related or you could think about an exercise plan also. It's just something that will take your mind off "I want a soda" or "that cake looks nice". These things torment you all day long but when you're busy with other things you have less time to listen to your brains thoughts about food and drink.

    I'm not trying to tell you what to do, just saying what has helped me so far (although I don't do it all the time as I'm human and I slip up, but that's OK, it's better than not trying!)

    Good luck!
  • sltaylor94
    sltaylor94 Posts: 60
    Blanketll, I sent you a private message.
  • elghee123
    elghee123 Posts: 489 Member
    Don't be hard on yourself. Discipline comes in time and practice.

    How I ditch soda? I simply slash it on my monthly grocery list. Save money, save energy in carrying it, less calories.
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
    You have to make a decision and then make yourself do it. We can all go "YEAH, YOU CAN DO IT!", But we can't MAKE you do it.
  • sltaylor94
    sltaylor94 Posts: 60
    I gave up soda cold turkey. I flat out refuse to drink it. I know that if i can refuse to drink a soda then i can also refuse to give up this journey.
  • droberts3311
    droberts3311 Posts: 87
    I know that you here it all the time but you are still so young. Great start!! I have always struggled with my weight as well, but 1 thing that really hit it home for me was really thinking about that I was in charge of my body and how I treated it. It does have to last you a long time. Do yourself a favor and start reading and watching documentaries on how and what they put in your food..... very interesting. It will change your eating habits and you won't even think about the dieting part, it is about eating healthy. Read Eat to Live, that is huge!!!!
    You can do this and you will. If you fall off the wagon, get right back on and keep getting on. DO NOT GIVE UP EVER!

    Please keep us updated, remember you are the one that is driving. Make the choice to get healthy!!
    :flowerforyou:
  • moxy28
    moxy28 Posts: 103 Member
    What a wonderful suggestion! I really like number 1! It kinda mimics a self-esteem booster I was taught and have others do when they're feeling down or struggling with self-esteem. Look in the mirror and find one thing you love about yourself. Tell yourself you love that part of you every morning. Then the next week find another thing and so on. Soon you will find that you're loving more of yourself then not. It doesn't matter how much weight you lose, if you cant love yourself as you are those feelings will continue long after the weight is gone. You don't have to love being over weight or the way it makes you feel, but you are soo much more than your weight!!!! Good luck sltaylor94!!
  • Nacho12
    Nacho12 Posts: 162 Member
    Just want to say, don't be down on yourself. Take small steps to get to your goal. I weighed 180 at one time so you are not too much more than I was. Take small steps to get to where you want to be. Here are a few things I would do:
    1. Subscribe to a healthy magazine to get some ideas of good food and exercises. This will give you new ideas to try monthly.
    2. If you can afford it, join a gym. When I think back a lot of the friends I have now are people I have met at the gym in classes over the years. The gym usually offers help getting started with a program. I would try some aerobic classes, Zoomba, something fun so that it makes you want to go back. If you can't afford to join a gym start going for small walks and then increase to longer walks. Also getting started on a weight lifting program will help you.
    3. Talk to a nutritionist to get an idea of what you should and shouldn't be eating. This really helped me.
    4. If you like carbonated sodas there are drinks that have carbonation that are good for you and are not high calorie. There are also artificial sweeteners that are good for you, such as Stevia and Coconut Sugar. You could make iced tea and sweeten with them and have a drink with no calories, cutting off a few hundred calories a day.
    5. Make sure you have a plan of what you are going to eat and are stocked up with healthy food. If not it is easy to get hungry and just eat too much because you are starving.
    6. Don't try to lose weight too fast. Just slowly work up to doing more activity and eating healthy and the weight will come off. Be patient.
    I hope this helps. Good Luck to you!
    Good Luck.
  • rhodieridge13
    rhodieridge13 Posts: 20 Member
    first of all congratulate yourself in taking the first steps towards becoming healthy.

    have you tried crystal light instead of soda? Yes, it does have artificial sweetners, but it's better than raw sugar for now.

    My fitness pal has a lot of inspirational stories, I read them to stay motivated.

    try replacing one soda with a crystal light, or a glass of water per day, then after one week, do 2 glasses of water to soda etc. Increase the water while decreasing the soda day by day.

    Let me know how you make out. Good luck. friend me if you like.

    I started at 273 now I' 208, but I did have the gastric sleeve done last year.
  • jessicarmaxwell5
    jessicarmaxwell5 Posts: 1
    Hi, I just read your story, and oh my, it sounds like mine. I was always in such a hurry to get "skinny" and never look at the big picture, I started, and stopped so many times, and then look back a kick myself for stopping when I did so good. And then just recently everything made since. I stopped looking a the "small picture" and started to really look at the big picture, and I realized that I have another 40-50 years on this earth, so I have my whole life to be healthy, I just have to get there. I have made some drastic life changes in my way of eating, I no longer chase after fad diets, or that magic supplement that makes you drop weight. I come to realize that I am over weight, not because of my own volition but because the food, and medical industry makes money by keeping people sick, and addicted to food. Everything that you consume right now I guarantee you is keeping you from losing weight, your diet foods, your processes nutritionist bars, you health drinks, your boxed cereals, your, breads,pasta, frozen food, your "low/free fat" "no sugar" are all designed to keep you fat, addicted, and unhealthy. Adapting a clean diet will keep you healthy, happy and free. I would encourage you to go onto youtube as I did, and watch videos about whats in our food, and become informed, and make that change once in for all. I hope this helps, and I wish the best for you.
  • handyrunner
    handyrunner Posts: 32,662 Member
    hi all...its a tough road trying to lose weight. Its always an emptional roller coster.. You feel so eleated when things are going the way you want them..ie scale moving down, and so depressed and fustrated when nothing happens. It can wear on you.

    but you have to muscle through those bad times...i think i used to give up so many times in the past because i felt so awful..like it was impossible. I had to change how i thought to make it stick..so it became about the excercise...i feel so great to be able to run and lift and do them well..it motivates me to stick with eating right. I still have 40+ to go but i just feel great all the time.

    I guess my point is dont get down..and dont beat yourself up over the fails...its just a setback not the end of the road..pick up and move forward..

    oh and OP...drink diet soda..i have the same addiction..i drink a couple of cans a day of diet and im still breathing smiles

    anyone can add me if they want to talk or just for more motivation
  • genas1975
    genas1975 Posts: 29 Member
    Have you looked into Stevia as a sweetner. It is natural and not made from chemicals. Good luck to you!
  • handyrunner
    handyrunner Posts: 32,662 Member
    Have you looked into Stevia as a sweetner. It is natural and not made from chemicals. Good luck to you!

    this as well.

    but if you do try and get it as a liquid...the granular has dextrose in it.
  • Sarahndipity30
    Sarahndipity30 Posts: 312 Member
    Stevia in the Raw is excellent. It helped me do away with sodas and sweet teas.

    One thing you just need to remind yourself everyday when you look in the mirror:

    YOU are BEAUTIFUL.
    YOU do DESERVE this.
    YOU are CAPABLE.
    YOU are in CONTROL.
    YOU are DETERMINED & STRONG.
    YOU CAN and WILL.

    Every day is another chance. Don't give up. Don't go backwards. ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS MOVE FORWARD. Do not let your past define you. Do not let your failed attempts tie you down. Every person that succeeds in life has failed many many many times. It won't happen overnight. But you already know this. you already know you have to work for it. And you CAN work your *kitten* off because you KNOW it is all mental. Push. Hang on to whatever is pushing you to do this..be it to fit into more clothes, to hike tha tbig trail..to get married..or have babies one day..or just to be able to walk up a flight of stairs! Whatever your goals are STICK to those. Keep them in sight. Faith my friend!
  • simsburyjet
    simsburyjet Posts: 999 Member
    Feeling fit is the greatest feeling you can have..
    Start walking as much as possible..
    Start eating lots of fruits and vegetables.
    Start your day out with a smoothie.
    Join a gym and go everyday.
    Hang around people that think being fit is a good thing.
    Do not overthink it just do it.
  • kncybul
    kncybul Posts: 13
    I think most have had that feeling at some point that "nothing is happening, why?" I think you need to stop being down on yourself.

    And I also think if you have a bad day, don't get down. Just go right back at it the next day. I'm sure we're all going to say what everyone else has said many times, and you've probably heard it more than once, but I still say, "Don't give up!"
  • RamonaFr
    RamonaFr Posts: 112
    Lots of good encouragement here. I enjoyed all the recommendations you folks posted.

    Think about this, too: you don't want to be 64 years old and saying to yourself, as I am, "this is the LAST time!" I've had weight problems my whole life, would have been nice to get a handle on it when I was your age!

    Also, one of the things that helped me become really confident and have a successful career was education. Please get an education, learn some skills that will keep you employed and get yourself an interesting career. You'll find the weight problems don't hold you back, if you don't let them hold you back.

    I liked the suggestion one person made of having more than one goal. Lose weight AND get that education! If you can't afford college, go to a career school and learn what you need there.
  • bubbybaloo
    bubbybaloo Posts: 1
    You watch all these TV shows like the Biggest Loser and my favorite - Extreme Weight Loss and what is it these people are doing? Yes, they are losing weight, but they are also working through some deep seeded emotional issue that caused them to gain weight in the first place. It might be sub-conscious but it's still there and they need help of someone to bring it out and work through it. Why not try therapy? I bet if you can figure out whatever that is, the weight loss should come easy.

    But it all comes down to integrity. You are breaking promises to yourself. And you're the only one who is suffering. If you were breaking promises like this to a friend, I'm not sure the friend would hang around very long. Put up motivational signs around your house. Motivation is something that needs renewed daily, if not several times a day. But I promise: once you start seeing results - and that will take a several weeks to a couple of months to see it physically - you will be addicted.
  • retiree2006
    retiree2006 Posts: 951 Member
    We get so caught up sometimes in wanting immediate results and so we become frustrated when we find it doesn't always happen that way. With March starting tomorrow, maybe consider giving it your best shot for the month and don't even step on the scale until the 31st. Realize some days may seem like a failure if you slip up, but don't let that derail you. If you show a loss...any loss...hopefully that will help you realize you're on the right track.

    Good luck!
  • chrasss151
    chrasss151 Posts: 2
    Stick with it! It gets easier once you start seeing results :)
  • Beth2bthin
    Beth2bthin Posts: 1
    I know how you feel. Been there and always trying to keep things out of my diet. I found that having a pitcher of water with lemon and lime slices in it, helps curve my appetite. Remember sweet tea has both caffeine and sugar in it. It was hard, but I started drinking un sweet tea with equal. Unsweet tea, water, decafe coffee and decafe tea are the only things that I drink. A soft drink, even diet and regular tea are all too sweet for me now. And I see the results, and I even feel better. Just keep reading up on healthy eating etc, and you will see those lbs. fall off..Beth
  • losing270
    losing270 Posts: 43
    I weigh around the same as you.. 267 and I am 41. You being younger than me has its advantages cause the younger you are the easier to come off faster. The older you are your metabolism is slower. I loved soda so much, but gave it up and just drink water. Now if I go out I will drink it just one glass. It is a treat. Just take baby steps. Use soda as a treat or sweet tea as a treat. If you don't like artificial sweeteners mix your tea half and half. Half real sugar and half sweetener. Do this until you are totally on sweetener. Again only drink it as a treat and do water the rest of the time.
  • bachampion04
    bachampion04 Posts: 137 Member
    Hello my name is James and I would be honored to help keep you motivated and provide any information you need to reach your goal.

    Friend request sent :-)

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