reached goal but not happy
clairecrowther
Posts: 12 Member
i reached my goal weight... yey me!!!
started at 14 stone 6lbs (i think, weighed at a post natal appointment at 92 kilos sure i put more on after but didn't dare the scales!)
earlier this week i made my target of 9st 6lbs (lost another lb since then). but i am just not happy when i look in the mirror. i had 3 c/sections and with the weight loss i have been left with a really unsightly bag of excess skin.
i work out every other day, usually focusing on running and cardio, but then 15-20 mins of resistance training thrown in, i also do daily squats, push ups and abs at home.
is it normal to change goal when you reach your original goal? (this is my first weight goal, but, as i am generally a quitter i set myself a dress size goal which i reached and broke, i wanted to be a 14 but am now a 10)
started at 14 stone 6lbs (i think, weighed at a post natal appointment at 92 kilos sure i put more on after but didn't dare the scales!)
earlier this week i made my target of 9st 6lbs (lost another lb since then). but i am just not happy when i look in the mirror. i had 3 c/sections and with the weight loss i have been left with a really unsightly bag of excess skin.
i work out every other day, usually focusing on running and cardio, but then 15-20 mins of resistance training thrown in, i also do daily squats, push ups and abs at home.
is it normal to change goal when you reach your original goal? (this is my first weight goal, but, as i am generally a quitter i set myself a dress size goal which i reached and broke, i wanted to be a 14 but am now a 10)
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Replies
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ETA: first congrats on your weight loss and reaching goal.
What you are describing is common for women honestly.
Weight is one thing but bodyfat is something else.
Losing more weight might make you happy but what will make you happier is losing fat.
Suggestion...
start eating more than 800-1100 calories a day, get at least 100g of protien a day and start a progressive load weight lifting program such as New rules of lifting for women or Strong lifts 5x5. As well eat exercise calories back...you are netting 800 calories on days you exercise.
And chances are the weight lost was not only fat but muscle as well due to your low calorie diet and lack of resistence training.
What you have now is that awful phrase "skinny fat"* where you are at goal weight but are "soft".
*yes people hate that phrase but you get what I mean0 -
Hello
I have changed my goal a few times now so I think that's normal.
Though if it's body shape that's bothering you diet alone won't change that, I have had 2 children and the abdominal muscle split won't go and there is the saggy skin too. Me personally I am thinking tone what I can then it's either surgery or like how you look
Be interesting to see what others say
x 0 -
I've seen PLENTY of people change their goals... Me included.
I started out shooting for a certain clothing size. Hit that but wasn't satisfied.
Changed to a weight goal, but then I realized that I wasn't as happy with my body composition as I liked.
So I started adding strength / resistance.
Got stronger and liked the results, so now I'm focused on personal strength goals (I WILL do that pull-up!) and macro / micro nutrition goals.
Some people go on a fitness journey - I'm going on a fitness meandering.
ETA: see Stef's advice. It's good.0 -
I think us women will always be unhappy with how we look to ourselves the only real way to get rid of skin is surgery so if you can afford it go for it or if you have a very good Dr explain to him it makes you depressed see what he says
Well done on your achievement0 -
I think us women will always be unhappy with how we look to ourselves the only real way to get rid of skin is surgery so if you can afford it go for it or if you have a very good Dr explain to him it makes you depressed see what he says
Well done on your achievement
Ugh. No!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OP, if you lost all that weight since September, you lost A BUNCH of lean muscle!
Try re-comping your body before you even consider surgery, PLEASE! Much less cardio, much more strength and EAT MORE!!!0 -
i reached my goal weight... yey me!!!
started at 14 stone 6lbs (i think, weighed at a post natal appointment at 92 kilos sure i put more on after but didn't dare the scales!)
earlier this week i made my target of 9st 6lbs (lost another lb since then). but i am just not happy when i look in the mirror. i had 3 c/sections and with the weight loss i have been left with a really unsightly bag of excess skin.
i work out every other day, usually focusing on running and cardio, but then 15-20 mins of resistance training thrown in, i also do daily squats, push ups and abs at home.
is it normal to change goal when you reach your original goal? (this is my first weight goal, but, as i am generally a quitter i set myself a dress size goal which i reached and broke, i wanted to be a 14 but am now a 10)
Okay, i looked it up twice, and 9 stone is somewhere around 126 pounds. I am not sure of your height but this for most women, unless your really tall is normal. I congrats you so much for your journey to the wieght loss. I understand what it's like to have "excess" skin or "excess fat" that seems like it wont work.
Let me state, in my pictures and weight, I am 15 stones. However, there was a time when I was 10 stones Wow that would be nice... anyways, I had lost 77 pounds from 222 pounds and gained it back (health issues)... not my point, point is...my experiance is... when I had lost that much weight I still saw all these problem areas like stomach pooch, arm flab, skin and big thighs, and hips that never left....
but even though I have gained a lot of weight back (makeing problem areas worse lol)
before I had no strength training or toning excersizes, the weight just kinda fell off. (again health issue)
Now with strength training and cardio, i have lost a lot more inches in areas I thought would never fall off. LOL. I gained muscel but the INCHES DISSAPEARED. LOL
From your post, it does look like your on the right track with the push ups, abs, squats, and resistance, which is all great for toneing.
Changing your excersize goal and calorie intake, is good. It gives your body muscel confusion and helps burn excess fat.
However, changeing your weight goal, of less then 126 pounds or 9 stones as you said, may not be good at all.
Just increase your toneing regiment. Or change it up with weights..or something. It will help.
The only other option is surgery to remove excess skin, but that should not be necessary for you.
Just be very happy you've lost the weight. Some poeople (like me) struggle so much with weight loss. You've done great, you can see it all over your body. Take pictures of yourself, compare. This also helps. Reason is, the "mirror" makes us paranoid sometimes, pictures do not lie. LOL0 -
Great work!
I would say lots of weight training and time. After weight loss our skin takes about 2 years to catch up, of course it might not all pop back but I'd consider get letting it do its thing and not worry too much about it until then. Also give your brain time to get used to the new you.
Now you've hit one goal why not think of a new one, that's not weight related? Doing a triathlon / focus on building your muscles back up
I'm kind of in the same boat, I don't look how I expected at my goal weight. I'm now doing lots of free weights and waiting to stop minding that my boobs will never be the same!0 -
Minimize your cardio and start lifting more weights.0
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Yes you can always change your goal, but make it reasonable. Setting a goal doesn't mean that you'll feel perfect at that weight or size. Feeling okay with yourself is much harder than just losing another 10 lbs or another size, it should come from within. When you've lost weight it usually comes from a combination of factors, such as feeling better at your new size, and feeling proud of how hard you worked. Don't push yourself too hard. You've had babies, your body was somewhat forced to change but this doesn't mean it's a bad thing, none of us is meant to be a certain way instead of another. Just try to do the best that you can for yourself and try to be the best version of you that you can be. Strenght training seems exactly what you need now, if you have a certain amount of weight to lose you will always probably lose some muscle along the way, but you can still fix it. There's no need to turn to surgery... constant exercise and a bit of self confidence will make you look much better than any surgery.0
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As others have said, you now need to change your body composition to get the look you want. Here's a picture (I hope) of one woman's weight loss/body comp journey. On the left, a pic of her at her goal weight. On the right, after she ditched cardio and started lifting heavy weights. She weighs more on the left but looks smaller. This is why people are often told not to focus on the scale--it may not really be your end goal.
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As others have said, you now need to change your body composition to get the look you want. Here's a picture (I hope) of one woman's weight loss/body comp journey. On the left, a pic of her at her goal weight. On the right, after she ditched cardio and started lifting heavy weights. She weighs more on the left but looks smaller. This is why people are often told not to focus on the scale--it may not really be your end goal.
I used this same pic to convince my sister to start resistence training..and she did...and bam...she is happier with her look now than she has ever been (and she was always a cardio bunneh)0 -
Thanks for sharing that pic and the advice! I am close to goal too but my body is still soft and untoned after two children. I will start some resistance training to hopefully turn it around 0
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I was going to congratulate you until I looked at your diary. I hope your not still breastfeeding as you're probably knackered enough as it is. Yeah you've lost weight way to quickly which will be responsible for your sag.
I am losing weight very slowly at a rate of about 1 pound per week - I hate it but you know what I am so toned. I could've lost 10 pounds a month if I had your daily intake but a lot of that would've been muscle/water.
That post above with the photo comparisons proves how irrelevant weight can be - it's all about body comp. If we could go back in time I could suggest a slower rate of loss but all I can suggest now is that you eat at maintenance and do some strength training. It's going to take you longer now to get to a place where your body looks great simply because of the slap dash method you chose to lose weight.0 -
one question. Why is your happiness tied to your weight or your body image? You are so much more than that . 0
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I plan on changing my goal several times.
I started with a "a would be happy at" then when I hit that, I'm going to set a new goal splitting the difference between my "happy at" and the high end of "ideal weight". I'm going to keep splitting differences working towards the low end of "ideal weight".
Once I hit the point where I think I look good and anymore is going to look bad, then I'm going to set a goal of 10 more pounds knowing that I'm going to gain it back in maintiance.0 -
start lifting :happy:0
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It is VERY common to change your goal once you get there and think you still need more work. The last time I was on this journey I lost all but 3lbs of my goal and was in a size 10... I wasn't happy there so I lowered my goal by 10lbs.. but then I got stuck for almost a year and ended up throwing in the towel and gaining it all back. If you just concentrate on being healthy... exercise... eating well... it will probably happen on all on its own Good luck! 0
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Stop focusing on weight, start eating more (a lot more,based on your dairy), focus on exercise, and give yourself time. And when I say time, I mean at least a year after giving birth and several months after losing the weight. Then reevaluate how you feel about your body. Keep in mind that sometimes the damage done to muscle and skin after c-sections cannot be completely undone without surgery, so do not set unrealistic goals for yourself. Starving will not change anything if you have the "pouch" type thing on your lower belly, above where the scar is.0
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I was going to congratulate you until I looked at your diary. I hope your not still breastfeeding as you're probably knackered enough as it is. Yeah you've lost weight way to quickly which will be responsible for your sag.
I am losing weight very slowly at a rate of about 1 pound per week - I hate it but you know what I am so toned. I could've lost 10 pounds a month if I had your daily intake but a lot of that would've been muscle/water.
That post above with the photo comparisons proves how irrelevant weight can be - it's all about body comp. If we could go back in time I could suggest a slower rate of loss but all I can suggest now is that you eat at maintenance and do some strength training. It's going to take you longer now to get to a place where your body looks great simply because of the slap dash method you chose to lose weight.
I have to agree. I was kind of surprised to look at your diary and see how little you're eating. Your body isn't getting enough of what it needs... so you're probably never going to be happy going at it this way. Two words:"Skinny fat". Start eating more and lifting.0 -
I have been doing this over and over again. I think it honestly depends on your goal. Would you consider yourself healthy? Last summer, I was so obsessed to lose two more pounds that I started working out an additional two hours a day after working outside all day. In the end, I weighed two pounds heavier at the end of the summer. I was so angry that I totally gave up and here I am starting over. This time, I'm trying not to be so obsessive about the number on the scale because honestly, last summer I was in the best shape of my life and while I was just over the healthy range on the BMI scale, I was a size two. It's easy to feel unhappy about your body; in fact I feel like women are programmed to do so from an early age. What it comes down to, do you feel that you need to make changes for your health? If not, I say continue what you are doing. Don't become obsessed with the scale and try to love yourself.0
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i reached my goal weight... yey me!!!
started at 14 stone 6lbs (i think, weighed at a post natal appointment at 92 kilos sure i put more on after but didn't dare the scales!)
earlier this week i made my target of 9st 6lbs (lost another lb since then). but i am just not happy when i look in the mirror. i had 3 c/sections and with the weight loss i have been left with a really unsightly bag of excess skin.
i work out every other day, usually focusing on running and cardio, but then 15-20 mins of resistance training thrown in, i also do daily squats, push ups and abs at home.
is it normal to change goal when you reach your original goal? (this is my first weight goal, but, as i am generally a quitter i set myself a dress size goal which i reached and broke, i wanted to be a 14 but am now a 10)
Congrats on reaching your goal! I'm not sure if it is normal to change goals after reaching the original but I have a few times and likely will several times more. I'm on a fitness quest rather than simply weight loss. At any rate, as long as you stay in your healthy weight range I see no reason why you can't change your goals from time to time.0 -
As others have said, you now need to change your body composition to get the look you want. Here's a picture (I hope) of one woman's weight loss/body comp journey. On the left, a pic of her at her goal weight. On the right, after she ditched cardio and started lifting heavy weights. She weighs more on the left but looks smaller. This is why people are often told not to focus on the scale--it may not really be your end goal.
I 'love' the results! Is there a way to do this without lifting weights? I have a neck injury that prevents heavy lifting so I only use dumbbells. Any suggestions?0 -
As others have said, you now need to change your body composition to get the look you want. Here's a picture (I hope) of one woman's weight loss/body comp journey. On the left, a pic of her at her goal weight. On the right, after she ditched cardio and started lifting heavy weights. She weighs more on the left but looks smaller. This is why people are often told not to focus on the scale--it may not really be your end goal.
I 'love' the results! Is there a way to do this without lifting weights? I have a neck injury that prevents heavy lifting so I only use dumbbells. Any suggestions?
Dumb bells are weights 0 -
As others have said, you now need to change your body composition to get the look you want. Here's a picture (I hope) of one woman's weight loss/body comp journey. On the left, a pic of her at her goal weight. On the right, after she ditched cardio and started lifting heavy weights. She weighs more on the left but looks smaller. This is why people are often told not to focus on the scale--it may not really be your end goal.
I 'love' the results! Is there a way to do this without lifting weights? I have a neck injury that prevents heavy lifting so I only use dumbbells. Any suggestions?
Dumb bells are weights Mine are only 3 lb each for a total of 6 lb so by many opinions likely won't do much. 0 -
^ This. A loaded barbell and dumbbells should become your friends. Start a progressive HEAVY lifting program now. Increase your protein macro to at least 30%. Back off the cardio. Congrats on your weight loss.Minimize your cardio and start lifting more weights.0 -
:-(0
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thanks for all the replies. couple of explanations.
yep i am skinny fat, still have abit of adipose under the excess skin.
the initial weight loss was acheived by going onto a PCOS maintanence diet, basically no carbs, the weight just melted, but i became ill with it, so i have been put onto this eating plan instead. it is still way too low for me, but it is an attempt to assist with the insulin resistance i have as a result of the PCOS. in a wee my carb intake will increase as will other macros.
yep i agree the weight loss was too rapid, however, i have a lot of hormone problems and a gluten intolerance, so a lot of the weight lost was as a result of trying to control both of these problems.
won't be going the surgery route for the excess skin. (and actually a lot of it was there already prior to weight gain after last baby) spoken to GP and as i didn't have bariatric surgery i don't qualify for this type of surgery on the NHS.
will speak to my trainer tomorrow about adding in some heavy lifting then, the cario will be staying as i have a personal goal of completing a 5k before my wedding in 8 weeks time!0 -
I think its perfectly normal and acceptable to change your goals once you've hit them. I certainly did. I mean this is a life long journey not just a temporary one so... I believe that each time you hit a goal you should congratulate yourself and establish new ones. I recently hit my goal and have set up new goals now that involve less cardio and more lifting, muscle/core work, endurance and strength training like others have suggested. I'll still get my few times a week cardio and elliptical but I'll focus more on toning up now than losing weight 0
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I too reached my goal weight and still not happy with myself. I want to look good naked! So yes I had to change my routine and this post is helping me just from reading the comments.0
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As others have said, you now need to change your body composition to get the look you want. Here's a picture (I hope) of one woman's weight loss/body comp journey. On the left, a pic of her at her goal weight. On the right, after she ditched cardio and started lifting heavy weights. She weighs more on the left but looks smaller. This is why people are often told not to focus on the scale--it may not really be your end goal.
I used this same pic to convince my sister to start resistence training..and she did...and bam...she is happier with her look now than she has ever been (and she was always a cardio bunneh)
Please help me...what is the best resistance training0
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