Anyone who reached goal weight and gained some back??!!?

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liftsforchocolate
liftsforchocolate Posts: 273
in Motivation and Support
I really really really need your help and support. I feel like I'm stuck in a cycle of eating unhealthy and not exercising and then exercising for a couple days but eating right. I have no problem working out, I actually love to! But not when I've ate some ridiculous amount of food, and I just think what's the point?

I'm not "overweight", but definitely have gained some weight back. The only reason I ever binge or decide to eat unhealthy is because I think, "oh, you'll never look as good as you did before! That'll take a couple months, might as well eat now and start tommorow" etc

Granted, I did gain some muscle, but I definitely put on more fat than ideal because there were certain days I just didn't care. I don't think it's an eating disorder, I just need help getting over the weight gain and focusing on tommorow.

How did you guys do it? For me right now, it's like a 1 step forward, 2 steps backwards deal and I honestly don't think I can put up with it much longer. My diary is open, but my days are so inconsistent. Most of the junk besides pb and nut butters are things I don't even like anyway. I'm just self-sabotaging myself because I've let myself go and gain these couple pounds.

Please help, really appreciate it!

Replies

  • mymodernbabylon
    mymodernbabylon Posts: 1,038 Member
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    Yup. I've been there many times. But I've figured it out. I make mistakes because I'm human. I'm not going to be perfect. But on those times when I don't eat as healthy as I might or drink a bit more than I ought, I forgive myself. and I eat better the next day. As you've written, it's ALL ABOUT WHAT YOU ARE THINKING. Be kinder to yourself. If you have an unhelpful thought, stop and try to figure out an alternative thought that is more helpful. For me, a lot of time, it's about reminding myself that I'm not perfect and that's okay. You can do it!!!
  • liftsforchocolate
    liftsforchocolate Posts: 273
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    Thank you so much! It really is about the mind. I'm chowing down on food right now even, but I just really need to change the way I think. I keep thinking of the past, when I should be thinking of the future.
  • BubonicTonic
    BubonicTonic Posts: 19 Member
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    Yup. You have to change the way you think. I reached my goal, and then started to slide a little. The problem with reaching goal is that now you can open the door a little wider, start to let some of those old habits back in... have two cookies, skip the gym, etc. and you won't immediately go back to the weight you were before. If you did, that would be motivation to stay on track! But it's lots of little decisions that lead you back to that place you were before. I let a few pounds back on, then ten, then it was 20.

    Now I'm 25 pounds over my goal because somewhere in there I panicked and tried a bunch of fads and diets that did nothing but make me a nervous wreck and I continued to gain. Some of those things work for other people (intermittent fasting, paleo, low carb, and more), but they did not work for me. The result was feeling even more that I was depriving myself, which led to binge eating like a crazy person.

    I went back to square one, I talked to a nutritionist and a therapist who specializes in bariatrics (not just surgery). I'm eating a balanced diet, I'm exercising, and not only am I physically feeling better about my weight, I'm emotionally feeling better because I don't feel deprived or out of control. Feed your brain and your body will follow. For me, depriving myself only led to more negative emotion. Eating a balanced diet where I allow myself to eat great stuff like fruit, berries, whole grain bread, yogurt, feels like I'm eating a lot but I'm under my calories and I'm in control. Best of luck to you.
  • mymodernbabylon
    mymodernbabylon Posts: 1,038 Member
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    Thank you so much! It really is about the mind. I'm chowing down on food right now even, but I just really need to change the way I think. I keep thinking of the past, when I should be thinking of the future.

    I found thought journals to be very helpful. (I'm a CBT therapist so it makes sense to practice what I preach). The best thought records can be found here: http://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/freedownloads2.htm. I like the STOPP ones as it really is about stopping for a moment and figuring out what your thought is all about. Plus, it works well in lots of other situations where I might put myself down. Try it!
  • dvisser1
    dvisser1 Posts: 788 Member
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    Yup. You have to change the way you think. I reached my goal, and then started to slide a little. The problem with reaching goal is that now you can open the door a little wider, start to let some of those old habits back in... have two cookies, skip the gym, etc. and you won't immediately go back to the weight you were before. If you did, that would be motivation to stay on track! But it's lots of little decisions that lead you back to that place you were before. I let a few pounds back on, then ten, then it was 20.

    I'm kind of in this right now. I actually shot below my goal weight by just over 10 lbs and tried to maintain and maybe gain slightly to get back to my goal weight. I was training 5-6 days a week for a marathon. With training so much and trying to gain a little weight, I was eating a ton and could really eat whatever I wanted. The bad habits came back. After running the marathon my training really cut back. Then I got injured in September last year and stopped working out entirely for 3 months. Unfortunately I kept eating whatever and however I wanted. At 6'2" (male) I went from as low as 206 lbs (with goal of 220) November 2012 to about 225 when running the marathon June 2013 to 260 lbs to start 2014. Maintenance I think is harder than losing weight because the goal is so very different, very nebulous. It's easy to push yourself to attain a specific goal (reaching a goal weight) but when the goal is simply no change, it's harder to focus on it.
  • liftsforchocolate
    liftsforchocolate Posts: 273
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    Thank you everyone, and definitely agree its much more difficult to maintain than to lose. I find it really easy to lose weight but to get started after a couple days of letting go is the hardest thing ever. I know exactly what to eat, exactly how much to exercise, all the exact numbers of carbs/protein/fat, even know at the biological level what happening. It might even be that I’m so obsessed with losing weight that I want it to be perfect, so when I do get started, it must be exactly the way I planned it. I give myself a lot of hate when I realize I’ve messed up, but I know it shouldn’t be this way.

    Like you guys, it was also little things at a time. (More like 1-2 bad days a week) I didn’t just gain it back in a day. But the sad thing is, I knew when I did gain it back, and freaked out, and just kept doing the same thing at an even more extreme level.

    I’m not usually the type of person that talks about “starting” things like diets etc anymore because I know those don’t work (I’ve also done keto, super low carb and low fat, vegan, paleo, nosugar/salt, water only even, you name it!)

    I’m starting a diet of not dieting. No low carb, no cutting out sugar completely. I can’t even remember the last time I ate fruit to be honest, so going to start making smoothies again also (that don’t just have only ginger and kale, serious). Being totally honest in my food log 1300-1400 cals, 140g protein min, 30g fat min, workout 6 days a week, we’ll see how this goes.

    Thanks again 

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