What to do when ....

Answer 1: I have a little of what I want. It's about portions and with it I just eat something healthy. Let's say I want chocolate. I'll have one serving of chocolate and eat an apple as well so I don't over eat the chocolate. Some people also mix chocolate chips in with nuts to make their snack healthier. Whatever works.

A good way to avoid a lot of problems is to have healthy snacks with you. If I go out sometimes I carry a ziplock bag with almonds in my purse, or a granola bar. Whatever works for you. If you are going to your families just bring a bag of your own snacks and make sure you eat something healthy and give it time to hit your system. Some people say that is 20 minutes. If you are still hungry after that, have a little bit of the other.

Really what I've found the most important thing is just learning how to portion. Have a little of what you want and have something healthy as well.

Answer 2: I have the exact same issue. I like to stress eat. One of the best things you can do is take that stress and put it into a workout. Go for a walk or do some kickboxing, something to help you vent it. It will help you clear your mind and start to become a healthier habit. Also you can distract yourself by playing a game or something.

Answer 3: The most important thing about losing weight is acceptance. You have to love yourself. If you love yourself you will want to be healthier for yourself and not other people. Confidence is key. Do what you do with confidence and if you fall off the band wagon for a day get right back on it. You are beautiful now, and you will still be when you lose weight, but what should change the most is what's inside. Dealing with anxiety, and depression among other things that make you eat and gain weight. Try to change your relationship with food and amazing things will happen. Best of luck.

We can all give you suggestions but ultimately you need to figure out what works for YOU. You didn't gain the weight overnight so don't expect to figure everything out overnight either. It's a process, one that can take months even years to figure out. I've been at this awhile with some success but it wasn't until recently that I changed a few things and the weight has been falling off me. I haven't had any binges, am eating all the foods I love, and am not obsessed with food anymore.

So please read through the replies, use the search function and further investigate how other people have gotten it done, and don't beat yourself up if your first plan doesn't work.

>>1st question. How do you control yourself from eating , binging, drinking in a sociol situation.

This is your journey. Not theirs. You can't expect or require them to give up whatever bad foods they're used to having. Do your best to make whatever modifications you can - have the burger without the bun, or see if you can make your own steak so that it isn't smothered in butter. Don't have as many fries as all that. Yes, this is going to draw attention to you if they aren't used to seeing you eat that way. Your only response need be, if you feel like you have to say anything at all, is, "that isn't very 'food journal friendly.'"

>>Question number 2.. Sometimes I just have a bad day, because I fight with family or money problems whatever it may be, and thats when i start going for foods.. what can I do to avoid binging on a bad day.

At some point, you'll have the discussion with yourself that you know the only reason you're eating is because you're stressed due to the situation, and the food isn't going to help the situation go away. I was really surprised when that happened to me. You're eating as a way to avoid the feelings and/or bury the feelings. My therapist always laughs at me now, asking if I find that things irritate me more now than they used to. I say, "Well, YEAH!!" He said it's because I'm dealing with the feelings instead of burying them. It takes time to be able to develop enough confidence or whatever to not address those issues through eating.

>>Question number 3. I know i am not alone with this, I live in a student dorm were I have to cook with everyone and everything I do is watched by everyone who lives here, i am also stariting school in 2 months or so, i am the biggest girl in the school and in my house. How do I ignore the negativity and not let it bring me down . how do i get the confidence to ignore them. my roomates have formed some kind of hatred towards me were they just stare at me all the time which makes me not want to cook..


Again, you'll need to develop your armor enough that you can say to yourself and anyone, "This is the path I'm on."

One of the doctors I've been working with has said that when you're on this path, it's okay to be selfish and put yourself first. You've spent so long trying to cater to others needs that your needs have fallen by the wayside. Enough of that. It's not a sin for you to focus on doing things that will put in you a position to be successful with your weight loss journey.

I started my journey in April 2011 at 376 pounds. Last year was a rough year....surgery, loss of my father, etc. But I'm back on track now. You're going to stumble along the way, and that's okay. Humans are fallible beings. We're made to make mistakes. It's not a question of "if" but "when." Make peace with the fact that you know you're going to stumble, and there are going to be meals and/or days when you're not "perfect" or a "bit off track". THAT's okay. It's what you do after that....you keep taking steps in the right direction, and don't dwell on those "off track" moments. If you focus on the negative, you'll resent the hard work you're doing. If you focus on positive, you're outlook becomes different. You know you stumble but that's okay, and you're only looking to make positive changes in the right direction.

You WILL get there - but only if you really want to and are willing to be uncomfortable enough to change.

You've already received a lot of good advice. Maybe when you go eat at your family's house, you could take a big salad or healthy side dish. You can still have some of your traditional family food (portion control) and then fill up on salad or the healthy side.

Also, when you are feeling stressed or sad or any feelings and want to eat, go for a walk. Walk some of the frustration off. You will feel better for getting some exercise in. Also, maybe write your feelings down in a journal or something. It sometimes helps to get them out.

As far as the others in your dorm, you just have to not let them get to you. I know that is easier said than done. Like others have said, they must be unhappy with something in their lives so they try to take it out on you to make themselves feel better. Just focus on your journey and you will show them. You are strong and can do this. It won't be easy but you can always turn here for support and know it will be worth it in the end.

Have you considered looking into OA in your area? It's an international organization that helps people with eating disorders. Overeating/binging/etc. I do this, too, and just started going, and it's going to help me, I know it. It could help you, too.

I just want to give you a hug.

I've been through what you have been through, and I know how difficult and discouraging everything can be.

Both I and my husband come from families that love to eat. We've been very good lately with keeping the junk food out of our house, but whenever family wants to have us over to eat or go out somewhere to eat, it's always a struggle. I always try to find what the healthiest option to eat is and focus my attention on that. If there is nothing healthy, then maybe try eating something healthier before going over so you're not as hungry and therefore not as tempted? Bringing healthy snacks along with you also helps, I've found. But sometimes you just want to have that "good stuff", and in that case just be smarter about it. Even if you eat a little more than you planned to, just look at it as "well, I ate less than I would have if I wasn't being conscious about it". Also, TRACK!! Even on the days that you don't do so well... still make yourself accountable. It helps!

As for the roommates go... I went through elementary school, middle school, high school, and college being very overweight. People can be very cruel, but try not to let it get you down. I know it's easier said than done, but they obviously have their own major issues and insecurities, otherwise they wouldn't care what you were doing. They need something else to focus their negativity on so that they don't have to look at themselves. In a few short years you'll understand what I mean (I'm only 5 years older than you).

If you ever need someone to talk to, feel free to message me. I also have a lot of weight to lose (as you can see by my ticker) which I've already lost once and unfortunately gained back again. I will add you as a friend.

In addition to what everyone else has said:

1) Eat before you go to social events, look up restaurant menus online and select a healthy option so you'll know what you're walking in to, drink lots of water while there, eat a burger with no bun and a veggie instead of fries are a few ways to combat this. You may never be able to get your family to change their habits so maybe you should shop for yourself and have those foods for when you visit the family.

2) Try to identify the triggers while they occur, not aferwards. If you find yourself reaching for food, try to reach for something healthy or go for a walk to change your mood and burn off calories.

3) Do not let what others think of you define you. People who are negative toward you without even knowing you or your story have their own issues. Plus, if you're seen around campus exercising, maybe a friend will join you or those negative people will see that you are working on yourself and they can just shut it up lol.

The biggest factor is not to let your environment bring you down. You've decided to do something about your weight and that alone is commendable. What everyone else thinks is irrelevant. Also, reward yourself with non-food items when you hit certain goals (scal or non-scale victories), and remember to be diligent but patient.

Good luck on your journey.