Yet Another Fresh Start

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legnarevocrednu
legnarevocrednu Posts: 467 Member
in Motivation and Support
Hello! I have been on MFP for well over two years, possibly three years now. I am trying everything I can to motivate myself, and I hope writing down my feelings might help. Here is a little background on myself. My highest weight was 259lbs. I started losing weight, and for one day, the scale said I was at 149 lbs! Only 4 pounds away from my goal! It was an amazing feeling. However, work stress started to get to me and emotionally, I was feeling very low. Since this past summer I have now gained 39 pounds. I have never felt so disappointed and disgusted with myself. It is almost worse knowing I am capable of losing the weight...that I know how to! I know how to count my calories and go to the gym 5 times a week, I just choose not to! How is that for honesty? I am devastated every time I go shopping, every time I pull on clothes that used to fit only a few months ago. I almost called out of work this morning after seeing 188 on the scale. I had tears in my eyes as I was driving to work, and again as I write this. I don't even want to go out anymore for fear that I will just eat things I shouldn't. This is not the way to live. Because I have been on MFP for a long time, I know what everyone will say. I've probably said the same things myself. I know all of the advice, the tips and the science behind losing weight. I know the only way I'm going to do this is to decide I'm going to do it and not give up. So here I am again! Making another fresh start...another resolution that I WILL LOSE THIS WEIGHT!! At least I never give up on trying! Feel free to add me if you have been through a similar situation. It's comforting to know I'm not the only one with these struggles.

Replies

  • silmarilliane
    silmarilliane Posts: 133 Member
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    good for you for getting back on it, and being so honest. i know exactly what you mean - i know how to do it, but i choose not to. my 'favourite' is, if i have a day off logging, i eat continually throughout the day because it doesn't matter... d'oh.
    i went from around 200lb to 150lb over the course of a year. the next year i was on and off because i knew i could do it if i set my mind to it, and by the end of the year i was around 190lb. cue another bout of losing, another one of gaining... i've spent the last year circling between 12-13 stone.
    i really struggle when i'm not in the 'mind set' of eating well, and unfortunately that seems to be most of the time.

    you've inspired me to fully log today though (i was going to not bother as it's pancake day and i'm going to zumba tonight)

    good luck :)
  • legnarevocrednu
    legnarevocrednu Posts: 467 Member
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    good for you for getting back on it, and being so honest. i know exactly what you mean - i know how to do it, but i choose not to. my 'favourite' is, if i have a day off logging, i eat continually throughout the day because it doesn't matter... d'oh.
    i went from around 200lb to 150lb over the course of a year. the next year i was on and off because i knew i could do it if i set my mind to it, and by the end of the year i was around 190lb. cue another bout of losing, another one of gaining... i've spent the last year circling between 12-13 stone.
    i really struggle when i'm not in the 'mind set' of eating well, and unfortunately that seems to be most of the time.

    you've inspired me to fully log today though (i was going to not bother as it's pancake day and i'm going to zumba tonight)

    good luck :)

    Awww well thank you for commenting! I'm glad I can inspire you. That's what we're all here for! Thanks for the friend request! :smile:
  • foreternity1981
    foreternity1981 Posts: 30 Member
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    Me, me!

    I lost 67 lbs, then when I hit my one year mark, I got slack. super slack. Like not logging my food (still logging in) and I wasn't really doing any exercise program. and I've gained like 15lbs back. I'm so disgusted with myself. It's my night time eating, I know it is. Blah!

    I am starting fresh and back on track. Heck, I'm running my first half marathon in May, I NEED to be back on track!

    We can do this, girlies. We've got this...!!

    -Katie
  • legnarevocrednu
    legnarevocrednu Posts: 467 Member
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    This is a hard journey and it's good to know I'm not by myself with its frustrations! Thanks for the add Katie! Look forward to supporting each other and finally losing the weight for good!
  • Breepa123
    Breepa123 Posts: 66 Member
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    I'm in the same boat. I went from 195 to 143 in 2009 (only 13 lbs away from my initial goal weight), then crept back up to 150 and maintained that until 2012/2013 because I thought I was looking pretty good and I got lazy. My weight started creeping up in 2012 because I hurt my back and started sitting around on the couch all evening. Then I got a new job and a divorce, then a new relationship where we cook fantastic meals together and cuddle on the couch all evening. I've put on another 30 lbs since the back injury, and it's not because I can't exercise, it's because I haven't bothered to control my calorie intake. Like you, I know what to do, and I'll start the day motivated to meet my calorie goal, and maybe get in some exercise, but I never stick with it.

    No real advice here, but I understand the struggle you're having! Good on you for never giving up. You've inspired me to keep trying as well. :flowerforyou:

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