Joining MFP

So, this is my first time using my fitness pal. Hopefully this really helps me. I currently weigh 215 lbs which is not healthy for my age or height. I've been overweight my whole life. I've been picked on since kindergarten. The bullying got so bad I actually left High school to do online school in the comfort of my own home which I still do today. All the stress & anxiety really affected my daily life. I stopped wearing short sleeve shirts, tank tops, long sleeves, shorts, leggings, jeans etc.. Basically I wear hoodies and sweatpants everyday even in 100 degree weather. I have a weird body shape. The fat is just everywhere. I rarely ever leave the house because I'm scared of society I guess. People have told me my whole life not to listen to what others say but, when you've heard it from so many people for 17 yrs it really takes a toll on your self esteem & self image. I've tried so many diet routines but, I always caved in to fatty foods. I took many different diet pills, at a point they helped me go from 180 to 155 but, I gained it all back because I starved myself and once I started to eat again, I gained a lot. So, here I am today hoping to achieve my goal of 150 by the end of the year. I miss going out,having friends, wearing gorgeous comfortable clothes, looking in the mirror & smiling & loving myself & feeling great about myself. It's time for a change. Hope this helps me.