Starting to lose motivation

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Momf3boys
Momf3boys Posts: 1,637 Member
in Motivation and Support
I'm really starting to lose my mojo and it's getting depressing. I have been busting my butt more than ever and NOTHING is coming off. I went to my Nutritionist last week and I have only lost 5 pounds in the past 3 months. I have been going to boot camp 3 times a week and doing awesome with it. I have been counting my calories and I drink nothing but water. I'm going crazy with this. My goal was to get my weight down before a major surgery that I will be having very soon. I meet with my surgeons next week and I'm guessing that the surgery will be some time next month. Here's my story:

Back in 2007 I woke up one morning and said enough was enough. I weighed 275 pounds and I hated myself. I worked hard....very very hard and I dropped 130 pounds in a year. I maintained my weight loss for over 2 years when I was diagnosed with breast cancer. My world came crashing down....during my cancer treatments I picked up about 20 pounds because I was exhausted and had no energy to work out. 6 months after completing radiation treatments I got pregnant...the pounds packed on. My baby was born in May 2012 and I have been in the battle of the buldge since then. I have dropped about 35-40 pounds but have about 30 more to go and it's not working...During my c-section for my last baby I had my ovaries removed because after genetic testing I learned that I carry the BRCA gene, which greatly increases my risk of the cancer coming back....having the ovaries removed reduces my risk. The doctors warned me that menopause is no friend to weightloss and they weren't lying. I meet with my surgeons next week to begin the process for a double mastectomy and reconstruction. I wanted to have my weight under control and back to where I wanted to be before going under the knife but I can't keep putting the surgery off....my Oncologist keeps pushing me to get it done and over with.

This is getting very depressing for me. This decision for this surgery was difficult but I know it's the right thing to do. This extremely slow to nonexistent weight loss is killing me. I just want to give up :cry:
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Replies

  • VelveteenArabian
    VelveteenArabian Posts: 758 Member
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    Are you getting zero results in all areas?

    How's your energy level?
    How are your clothes fitting - tighter, looser, the same?
    Are you measuring your body and keeping track of changes in dimension?

    You could be undergoing a body decomposition but if you're only looking at the scale you could be missing it.
  • Momf3boys
    Momf3boys Posts: 1,637 Member
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    I don't feel any difference in my clothes and when I go shopping I am buying the same size...smaller sizes don't fit. I have not measured myself but my body has not gotten any smaller. It's really a mystery to me and my doctors. I gave them a print out of my fitbit summary and they didn't have any suggestions for me. They didn't understand what was going on either. I really want to cry.
  • luvcookies2014
    luvcookies2014 Posts: 48 Member
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    I can't give much advice, as I'm a super slow loser, but wanted to say hang in there.

    I have come to realize that even if I'm only capable of losing 1lb a month, then so be it. I know I'm eating healthier and exercising more. The results may not be noticeable looking at me, but I can run further than I have been able to for years.

    Regardless of your weight, do you feel fitter?
  • Lizzy622
    Lizzy622 Posts: 3,705 Member
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    BE patient and do what needs to be done. Look to living a long healthy life for your boys and don't worry so much about the short term goals. My short term goals are now based on things I can do and control like what I eat and how much I exercise. What my body does with that is out of my control. The scale will go down eventually. :heart:
  • gieshagirl
    gieshagirl Posts: 102 Member
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    sometimes when we are under great stress...our body goes into fight mode....or ie....survival mode. your body will store everything it can in anticipation of a largescale battle. this can last 6 months or so. after your surgery, you will be on pain meds....this will also slow everything down. no problem. as your battle mode feelings get better after the surgery and the pain meds decrease, so will you. you may notice the inches more than the weight at 1st. muscle weighs more than fat but is more compact. if you have been exercising this dynamic might be what you have been dealing with. i pray the best for you with your surgery and am sure that after everything is said and done you will look and feel great !keep up the great work..you are so worth it!!!:drinker:
  • Chickee8586
    Chickee8586 Posts: 155 Member
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    You are going through a lot of stress right now. Your body compensates for that by messing up what you think is a perfectly reasonable plan.

    Just because you have set a deadline for what you wanted to happen doesn't mean it won't happen eventually. It's possible your plan was too agressive. Reevaluate everything in your life and consider setting a more reasonable goal timewise. It isn't just what you are putting into your effort, it's everything that affects your health and wellbeing.

    This effort should have been and should always be a sustainable lifelong pursuit. Achieving your goal isn't the end of it. What you do now shouldn't be only for a short time. It should be what you think will be doable for the rest of your life.

    Sometimes we just put too much pressure on ourselves to achieve something and when it doesn't work out, we lose focus and determination. Think back to why you started this path. What did you really want? Weight loss? Or was it to feel better about yourself, feel healthier, able to do what you want to do rather than only what you can do.

    You have come this far, find another reason (or reinforce the original reason) to keep going.
  • jlynnm70
    jlynnm70 Posts: 460 Member
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    I agree - with every thing you are going through - just watch and maintain. Don't get too upset. Have your surgery - get healthy and back to par - then try again. Eat healthy - go for walks in the meantime - just try not to stress about it. It sounds like you have enough going on without adding to the stress by worrying about why you aren't losing any weight.

    I bet once the stress levels in your body and life are reduced, things will start happening again.

    Good luck to you.
  • jstout365
    jstout365 Posts: 1,686 Member
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    It sounds like you are stressed to the max and dieting is just another stress. Losing weight when your stress levels are up can be very difficult. Your health issues are stressful in themselves and then adding the pressure to lose weight before you take care of your surgery may just be too much for your body to take on.

    Here is a great article that discusses stress and how it can affect weight loss. You don't mention your calorie deficit amount and it doesn't seem like you are doing too much activity, but other stress can have similar results. http://www.bodyrecomposition.com/fat-loss/why-big-caloric-deficits-and-lots-of-activity-can-hurt-fat-loss.html

    It may be hard to hear this, but you may need to give yourself a break. Reduce the stress and take care of the health stresses before you tackle the weight you want to lose.
  • lindabeth333
    lindabeth333 Posts: 130 Member
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    You Are strong and brave - be nice to yourself - you are doing the best you can every day and that is enough. I admire your hard work. Just keep on going
  • Steezburt
    Steezburt Posts: 23
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    I'm no doctor but get your thyroid checked. Also, don't lose motivation, just adjust the way your exercising. Do more cardio in various ways: walking, jogging, jogging to sprinting for 30 seconds to jogging again. Don't limit your cardio to just machines. Also, try weight lifting. You can lift 5-10lb weights and do varying exercises with them. But they do say that getting a great body is 80% nutrition and 20% fitness, so maybe you can also change up your diet and when going to the store, try shopping on the outskirts of the store and avoid the isles as much as possible.

    Measure yourself when you start your weight loss journey and continue tracking your measurements every month. If you're 250+ than it's easier to lose weight quickly but anything under that will take more time, motivation and dedication. You got this! No need to get discouraged. I used to get down on myself when I didn't see the scale moving but if you keep pushing and varying your exercises and doing ones that confuse your muscles then you'll be fine. Try it out and let us know how it works for you :)

    Ps, i know cancer is tough because I lost my mom to breast cancer last year, but don't let that discourage you. You can beat this and you can reach your goals if you set the correctly and make them realistic. Cancer can be a Debbie downer, but don't let that affect you. You are strong, you are wise as you will overcome all adversity. We are with you 100% and I know you will reach your weight loss goal in no time.
  • wmstormvet
    wmstormvet Posts: 145
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    I can't give much advice, as I'm a super slow loser, but wanted to say hang in there.

    I have come to realize that even if I'm only capable of losing 1lb a month, then so be it. I know I'm eating healthier and exercising more. The results may not be noticeable looking at me, but I can run further than I have been able to for years.

    Regardless of your weight, do you feel fitter?

    I completely agree with this. Even if I am not losing as much as I would like, just being healthier with some exercise and healthier eating is better for me. I lost really slow too and struggle with it too. I don't have any advice except don't give up!!
  • wmstormvet
    wmstormvet Posts: 145
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    It sounds like you are stressed to the max and dieting is just another stress. Losing weight when your stress levels are up can be very difficult. Your health issues are stressful in themselves and then adding the pressure to lose weight before you take care of your surgery may just be too much for your body to take on.

    Here is a great article that discusses stress and how it can affect weight loss. You don't mention your calorie deficit amount and it doesn't seem like you are doing too much activity, but other stress can have similar results. http://www.bodyrecomposition.com/fat-loss/why-big-caloric-deficits-and-lots-of-activity-can-hurt-fat-loss.html

    It may be hard to hear this, but you may need to give yourself a break. Reduce the stress and take care of the health stresses before you tackle the weight you want to lose.

    This looks like great advice to me!
  • Momf3boys
    Momf3boys Posts: 1,637 Member
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    Thank you so much everyone for the awesome suggestions, advice and kind words. You guys are all correct, I do have a lot of stress going on right now. I talk about my upcoming surgery all the time...on here, at work, with my friends, etc. but the second I walk into the doctors office I break down. I hold it all in until it hits me that it's real and it's going to happen.

    For those that asked, I go to bootcamp on Monday, Wednesday and Saturday and I walk 3-5 miles on Tuesday and Thursdays. Yes, I do feel more fit...I am doing regular push ups now instead of on my knees...I'm doing one legged squats now when I couldn't before...the workout is easier for me but I think that makes it even more frustrating for me. If I were a healthy weight I wouldn't be concerned but I'm still "obese". I know that the scales are just a number but it's a number that is way too high right now.

    I know that I will never give up but to keep my level of motivation up it is difficult.
  • goldthistime
    goldthistime Posts: 3,214 Member
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    Hugs! I lost my mom and aunt to cancer because of a defect in BRCA1 gene (undiscovered till it was too late), and my cousin battled it (ovaries removed and double mastectomy). My heart goes out to you. I assume you are on some kind of hormone replacement therapy? That should lessen the effects of your oophorectomy. You have a lot on your plate but you and your family are worth the fight. Just keep swimming.
  • DWBalboa
    DWBalboa Posts: 37,259 Member
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    If you are sure you’re logging everything correctly and you are within your targeted macro’s and you’re exercising but still not losing maybe you should see a certified dietitian. Talk with your Doctor and get their perspective as well (if you haven’t already), with everything that you have been through there can be any number of issues causing you not to lose weight. Have you had a full physical with blood work done lately? I’m not trying to get you worrying about anything but I would not make the assumption that you’re doing something wrong it may be something more physical that can be a simple fix that a Dr. or a dietician may be able to address for you. Just don’t let yourself get distressed over it.
    Good luck and best wishes.
  • slimfitnessmoms
    slimfitnessmoms Posts: 206 Member
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    Thank you so much everyone for the awesome suggestions, advice and kind words. You guys are all correct, I do have a lot of stress going on right now. I talk about my upcoming surgery all the time...on here, at work, with my friends, etc. but the second I walk into the doctors office I break down. I hold it all in until it hits me that it's real and it's going to happen.

    For those that asked, I go to bootcamp on Monday, Wednesday and Saturday and I walk 3-5 miles on Tuesday and Thursdays. Yes, I do feel more fit...I am doing regular push ups now instead of on my knees...I'm doing one legged squats now when I couldn't before...the workout is easier for me but I think that makes it even more frustrating for me. If I were a healthy weight I wouldn't be concerned but I'm still "obese". I know that the scales are just a number but it's a number that is way too high right now.

    I know that I will never give up but to keep my level of motivation up it is difficult.

    Im thinking It's gotta be with what you are eating. I am not saying you are eating badly...but some people's body cannot tolerate certain foods, even certain healthy ones and maybe you need to start going through what you are eating and take some things out of the picture and like others said check with your doctor.
    That is why I love Myfitnesspal.
    I have had to play around with foods and carbs to get to my weight loss goal and I noticed that if I eat more than 120g of carbs
    I CANNOT lose weight very easily. I am also hypothyroid so it made it difficult too. Add me if you would like extra motivation and accountablility! :)
  • Momf3boys
    Momf3boys Posts: 1,637 Member
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    Hugs! I lost my mom and aunt to cancer because of a defect in BRCA1 gene (undiscovered till it was too late), and my cousin battled it (ovaries removed and double mastectomy). My heart goes out to you. I assume you are on some kind of hormone replacement therapy? That should lessen the effects of your oophorectomy. You have a lot on your plate but you and your family are worth the fight. Just keep swimming.

    I'm so sorry to hear about your mom and your Aunt.

    No, I am not on any hormone replacement because my cancer was hormone positive so I cannot take any hormone replacements. I also am not taking tamoxifin (the drug that you take for 5 years following breast cancer). I also have the Factor V gene which causes blood clots and tamoxifin can cause blood clots so thats why I am not taking that. Sometimes I feel like I live in a doctors office. I was once someone who never went to the doctor, never had a reason to...until the day after Thanksgiving 2010 when I felt a lump....now I have what my co-workers call my "medical team". During my last pregnancy I developed 13 planters warts on the bottom of my feet....I could barely walk and I tried everything to get rid of them. I discussed it with my doctor and was told that I had too much going on to worry about my feet....with that going on I couldn't even go for walks during the pregnancy to help with the weight. I had to undergo two additional biopsies during the pregnancy because they thought the cancer came back. Luckily it did not but it was an extremely stressful pregnancy.

    @ DWBalboa, I do see a dietician/Nutritionist. I met with her last week and her only suggestion was to increase my calories. She said that I was doing everything right and didn't have an answer why I wasn't losing any weight. It's frustrating, to say the least.

    Thanks again everyone for all of your suggestions/advice/motivation and support....you have no idea how much it means to me!
  • goldthistime
    goldthistime Posts: 3,214 Member
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    Hugs! I lost my mom and aunt to cancer because of a defect in BRCA1 gene (undiscovered till it was too late), and my cousin battled it (ovaries removed and double mastectomy). My heart goes out to you. I assume you are on some kind of hormone replacement therapy? That should lessen the effects of your oophorectomy. You have a lot on your plate but you and your family are worth the fight. Just keep swimming.

    I'm so sorry to hear about your mom and your Aunt.

    No, I am not on any hormone replacement because my cancer was hormone positive so I cannot take any hormone replacements. I also am not taking tamoxifin (the drug that you take for 5 years following breast cancer). I also have the Factor V gene which causes blood clots and tamoxifin can cause blood clots so thats why I am not taking that. Sometimes I feel like I live in a doctors office. I was once someone who never went to the doctor, never had a reason to...until the day after Thanksgiving 2010 when I felt a lump....now I have what my co-workers call my "medical team". During my last pregnancy I developed 13 planters warts on the bottom of my feet....I could barely walk and I tried everything to get rid of them. I discussed it with my doctor and was told that I had too much going on to worry about my feet....with that going on I couldn't even go for walks during the pregnancy to help with the weight. I had to undergo two additional biopsies during the pregnancy because they thought the cancer came back. Luckily it did not but it was an extremely stressful pregnancy.

    @ DWBalboa, I do see a dietician/Nutritionist. I met with her last week and her only suggestion was to increase my calories. She said that I was doing everything right and didn't have an answer why I wasn't losing any weight. It's frustrating, to say the least.

    Thanks again everyone for all of your suggestions/advice/motivation and support....you have no idea how much it means to me!

    Ahhh! Forget bootcamp, you need a punching bag!
  • EreborsPrincess
    EreborsPrincess Posts: 139
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    Momf3boys,

    I am a breast cancer survivor. I was diagnosed in June 2010, had lumpectomy/lymph nodes removed in July followed by 7 weeks of radiation (thankfully no chemo). It took me at least 18 months before I remotely felt like myself again - you went through a huge ordeal and then gave birth on top of that.

    It's been very slow going for me and to be honest I gave up for a long time after my treatment was finished, based on an off-hand remark from my oncologist. He told me that it would be extremely difficult for me to lose weight because cancer and the subsequent treatment ages your body. So I sat around on my backside for a long time and didn't try to do anything.

    I go back to see him for my 4-year follow up at the end of May. By then I'm hoping to be at 180, if not slightly below - just to prove him wrong.

    You can do this. It might be a slow process but you can do it. Add me as a friend, I'd be happy to cheer you on.
  • sweetpea03b
    sweetpea03b Posts: 1,124 Member
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    Well... don't know how your health problems play into your issue with losing weight... but... have you been taking pictures, measurements? Do you notice your clothes getting a little baggier? Personally, I have been at this almost a year and just hit 10lbs lost.... but I've lost like 8 inches and atleast 1 jean size. I'm the same measurements I was at my smallest 5 years ago 18lbs lighter so I know that my body composition has changed GREATLY. Never underestimate all of that... I know it sucks not seeing the scale move but the biggest thing is your body size.

    That being said.... if you're in it for the long haul you just gotta hang in there. I know that's not what you want to hear but if you're making good food choices and getting active... eventually the weight will follow once you get all of your health issues in check. The most important thing is your health. **hugs** keep at it... you're a strong woman and you'll get there if you put your mind to it!

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