I'm so frustrated, and embarrassed.

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Well, i want to start off that even though i am new here, like i'm sure so many of you, i am not new to the whole "fat" thing.
This seems like a great site, and im hoping that by writing this i can pick myself up off the floor and start my journey. Yes it will be the 10th or 12th time i have started this same journey, but i really want to stick to the trail this time. I am hoping to find some support in my below story, and that no one will judge me. I think its safe to say, we are all sick of being judged.

Today started off great. I woke up, motivated and excited to start the day. Then, something happened at work and i got stressed out. All of a sudden i made my way to the nearest grocery store, picked up a box of mozza sticks, and a cheesecake and went home and preceded to eat the entire package of both! WHAT? How did that even happen? How did i make it out of the store, without telling myself that if i were to go home and eat this, i would feel exactly how i feel right now. Depressed, frustrated, embarrassed and so very very angry. All i want to do is shake myself and cry. I am never going to finish the journey, if i cant even start it...

Replies

  • DJJW
    DJJW Posts: 519 Member
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    We've all done it. When I've gotten off course in the past, it can start with one cookie, yes one. Then I'm like "well there goes today" so eat more and more and more. You did it, its over. Your here.....and we are here for you.
  • jenn50
    jenn50 Posts: 81
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    at least you know what you did. don't beat yourself up for it just try better next time. you have to start somewhere. next time you get angry or frustrated just think to yourself "you just wait til im thin and where i wanna be" you got this!!
  • saaraah1031
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    Aw girl! I'm in the same boat as you! I just eat and eat and don't even realize I'm doing it! I have my senior week coming up, so yeah I'm pretty young and I shouldn't be worrying about my weight, but I've always been on the chubby side all my life and with me being five foot & that's all I'm ever going to grow, I want to lose at least 10 pounds and be in my range of weight for my age. But welcome :) feel free to talk to me if you'd like! I'm new as well!
  • NightOwl1
    NightOwl1 Posts: 881 Member
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    Don't give up! Losing weight is a war, not a battle! You are going to lose a lot of battles, especially in the beginning. You are going to have bad days when you give in to all of your cravings and good days and days in between. The key is to just keep fighting and never give up. If you do that, you can't lose!
  • zumba66girl
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    yes we are all here for you....We all have bad days and for some reason food is comfort. Don't beat yourself up...take baby steps and soon it will all get easier. Need to talk I am here.:flowerforyou:
  • MDarker
    MDarker Posts: 15 Member
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    I feel so better reading those replies. It's so hard to see the sun, when all you see is grey sky. Thank you guys for the support, i really needed it tonight.
  • classyleo77
    classyleo77 Posts: 98 Member
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    Don't give up! Losing weight is a war, not a battle! You are going to lose a lot of battles, especially in the beginning. You are going to have bad days when you give in to all of your cravings and good days and days in between. The key is to just keep fighting and never give up. If you do that, you can't lose!

    Perfectly said!!
  • Jerri_Thompson
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    Food is good and we all turn to it for comfort not realizing the long term affects of what it was. You ate it. You cant change that now. Tomorrow is a new day! There is a song "Get Back Up Again" :
    We lose our way,
    We get back up again
    Never too late to get back up again,
    One day, you gonna shine again,
    You may be knocked down but not out forever,
    Lose our way, we get back up again,
    So get up, get up
    You gonna shine again
    It's never too late, to get back up again
    You may be knocked down, but not out forever,
    May be knocked down, but not out forever

    Now I know this was probably silly for me to copy and paste lyrics but you must think like this each day. If you start off great and because of life, you fall, get back up! :) Not sure if this helps! I have been battling weight since I was 12 years old! I am down 30lbs now since September, 40lbs lighter than last Christmas! Its hard but everyday you do what you can and stay focused. Some days you cant, some days you can. Praise each step! You have a day like today, come on here and ask for help! There are many who may be going through the same exact thing you are and could help you through it :) Who cares if its your 20th time into this journey...the best thing is that you keep coming back :) Take care and take each day one step at a time! Tomorrow is a new day! :) You can do this!
  • jenneyd
    jenneyd Posts: 308 Member
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    Don't give up! Losing weight is a war, not a battle! You are going to lose a lot of battles, especially in the beginning. You are going to have bad days when you give in to all of your cravings and good days and days in between. The key is to just keep fighting and never give up. If you do that, you can't lose!

    very nicely said!
    the support here is so awesome! thank you supporters!
  • 2bFitNTrim
    2bFitNTrim Posts: 1,209 Member
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    I would bet everyone reading your story can relate. Eating healthier takes practice. Breaking bad habits takes time. You will fail and fail, then succeed, then fail, then succeed...like the poster b4 me said, think of it as a war, not battle. You will fail as you go along.. But if you keep at it, you will succeed in the end. Patience is key. So is being kind to yourself. :flowerforyou:
  • sjd2010
    sjd2010 Posts: 106
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    Don't beat yourself up. Just take this journey one step at a time. Change one thing at a time so you don't become overwhelmed. It will happen - this is not a sprint, but a life-time marathon! It is so very much worth it, don't give up. Go slow and study and you will make it happen!:flowerforyou:
  • lupuslady
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    Please pick yourself up and give yourself the credit you deserve. You wrote in. You will do better tomorrow and do not think for one minute you cannot do it this time, because you really really can. I am stuck in bed today with terrific pain from my arthritis, but I am not giving up. I don't want you too either.
  • purplepanda
    purplepanda Posts: 30 Member
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    the most important thing is not to judge yourself to harshly. Whatever you've done in the past (whether 5 min ago--or 5 days, or 5 weeks, etc) is past. You cant change the past so just forget about it. Look forward to tomorrow, reset your mind with a plan to eat better and get some exercise. Eventually, you won't have to think as hard to avoid your trouble spots and you might even be able to start occasionally substituting some type of fun activity (I like to do a dancing progam on the Wii when I need to relieve the stress of a bad day) that will burn calories instead of eating.
  • IsntSheLovely
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    I've done the very same thing you did. I found that my mind just shuts down; I don't even think about what I'm doing at all, and repeat the same bad eating habits - it's almost like I'm in a trance or something. Reading the success stories EVERY DAY and the different community boards EVERY DAY keeps me focused and on point. If I didn't do that, I'd eat badly every day (like I did today, for example). Keep the faith!!!! :smile:
  • joycieee
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    Baby, look at me! I've been there and we can do it together! I'm not only doing things this way, but I'm also doing Weight Watchers at the same time. I'm here if you want to talk. This isn't the first time around for me.
  • DawnOf1969
    DawnOf1969 Posts: 726 Member
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    Been there done that so many times. Keep looking forward, no looking back. You did it, acknowledged it, learned from it. Tomorrow is a new day.