I lost my badass

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I'm feeling lost right now. I've felt pretty badass for a few years - meaning I've been pushing myself with goals and achieving things I thought weren't possible for me - and that has kept me happy and motivated. But lately, I seem to have lost the feeling.

A few years ago, I lost 70 pounds and wore a bikini on vacation for the first time ever...I felt pretty awesome about that. Two years ago I started running, did my first half marathon, and did Tough Mudder by myself - my friends even called me badass then. Last year I did my first marathon - a lifetime goal - and my son standing at the finish line with a "go, Mom!" sign made me cry badass tears.

Over the summer, I injured my heel which kept me from running for three months and went through a brutal breakup. I'm trying to get back to myself but I lost a lot of self esteem in the bad relationship and I'm frustrated with the amount of fitness I've lost, the decrease in my running pace, and the few pounds I've gained due to the injury. My goal this year is to run one half marathon a month. I know that's a decent goal and I should feel good about it, but every time I look in the mirror all I can say to myself is "you aren't going to be as good as you were a year ago".


I'm just curious....what keeps you going when when you've had setbacks in life or fitness?

Replies

  • MzHornedOne
    MzHornedOne Posts: 71 Member
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    I feel the same way! I was doing great and working hard toward my fitness goals. I had lost 30lbs and then got pregnant....now I'm back at the beginning and struggling...totally lost my badass :(

    BUMP!
  • HealthyLeeLee
    HealthyLeeLee Posts: 97 Member
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    I know it's cliche, but try not to be too hard on yourself. Injuries and break-ups are REALLY difficult things to go through. Give yourself some time to take care of yourself (emotionally, mentally and physically) and then I guarantee you'll start to get your badass back :) Sometimes when I push myself too hard, it just doesn't happen. Then I back off, give myself some leeway and that old "badass" feeling comes creeping back in. Thanks for sharing what you're going through friend! The fact that you've done all the things you've done makes you a badass to me ANY day! :)
  • waterwing
    waterwing Posts: 214 Member
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    I'm going through the same kind of thing right now. I am just working on reminding myself that this is a process... my body could do amazing things once and it will again. And then I remember how bad days and periods happen to us all. Don't beat yourself up for down times. We all go through them and sometimes it's a good thing to take a break.
    But then eventually you'll need to put your shoes back on and get out there and eventually you'll start to love it again. It'll come back!
  • knra_grl
    knra_grl Posts: 1,568 Member
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    You're still badass! You just forgot! Dust yourself off and realize what you have accomplished. Break ups are hard and they wreak havoc on our self esteems but you have it in you to achieve your goals. You already proved it. Good luck with your half marathons! :drinker:
  • MissySpring
    MissySpring Posts: 442 Member
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    Thank you for sharing your story. You will get your bada$$ back. (you're still bada$$ to me) My motto when I'm not feeling it...Fake it till you make it. Somehow that helps me get over the hump. Best of luck
  • katro111
    katro111 Posts: 632 Member
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    Been there... Just now these past couple of months am I getting my badass back. Crap happens and it takes time (which no one wants to hear or deal with, I know lol), but you'll get it back! Just hang in there!
  • So_Much_Fab
    So_Much_Fab Posts: 1,146 Member
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    I hear ya - I feel the same way. If you find your badass can you share a little with me until I find mine??
  • knittnponder
    knittnponder Posts: 1,954 Member
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    Well, I think the first thing is to quit the negative self talk. If you had a friend who was trying to come back from the same thing, you would never tell them they wouldn't be as good as they were before. It's so hard not to be down on yourself, especially when you're frustrated with where you're at compared to where you've been!

    You may not feel badass now but if you begin and simply start heading toward your goals then before you know it, "badass" will sneak up on you. Remember before? You didn't start out feeling like that, it came when you'd been working awhile and realized just how awesome you were doing. So start, work toward your goals and focus on heading the right direction. There may be some small set backs but you get up, dust yourself off and start working toward it again.

    Not only will you regain your fitness, you will regain that self esteem you lost as well. Grieving over what you have lost, whether the relationship or the fit person you were before your injury, is okay but don't stay there forever.

    You did it before, you can do it again. Just begin.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    Life is full of ebb and flow; ups and downs. So you were up for awhile and now you are back down.

    Guess what... it's a continuous cycle and your badass will come back around again, and if you do it right, you may even feel like more of a badass.

    Just don't give up on it. Be persistent and keep trying. The only way to truly fail is to give up completely.
  • andreyadonna
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    It's the kid. I always push for the kid. And I always will. I'm starting to get into running so that next year I can referee soccer, which he's about to start. I won't ever ref his games, but it's something we'll have together.
  • BikerGirlElaine
    BikerGirlElaine Posts: 1,631 Member
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    I just focus on being better today than I was yesterday. A year ago, or 10 years ago, is too far back for me to worry about. You know what they say... "If you have one foot in the past and one foot in the future you end up s---ing on today.
  • jlapey
    jlapey Posts: 1,850 Member
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    You may not be as good as you a year ago right now, but there's no reason you can't be later. You gotta start somewhere. Or in your case, RE-start somewhere.
  • Mia_RagazzaTosta
    Mia_RagazzaTosta Posts: 4,885 Member
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    My life is crazy; getting my workouts in is about the only thing that keeps me sane.

    Sometimes breaks are good. They remind you why you got into it in the first place.
  • seren1ty74
    seren1ty74 Posts: 171 Member
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    You are badass for being here and reaching out. The injury and the breakup do NOT dictate who you are, just where you are right now. You will rehab your injured heal and broken heart in time, and will NOT give up, and that alone is badass enough!
  • asdowe13
    asdowe13 Posts: 1,951 Member
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    Been there... Just now these past couple of months am I getting my badass back. Crap happens and it takes time (which no one wants to hear or deal with, I know lol), but you'll get it back! Just hang in there!

    I'm sorry is that a gun weilding Cat riding a fire breathing Unicorn???

    That is badass, just like you and everyone on here.
  • mccindy72
    mccindy72 Posts: 7,001 Member
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    Life is not static. If you always stayed the same, how would you rate who you are? Having a setback now and then can create new goals for you to achieve and give you a place to look back to so you can say, look what I did again. I can have setbacks and be strong enough to come back from them again and again. Nothing can keep me down.
  • CMoeDee
    CMoeDee Posts: 102 Member
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    That feeling when you're back on top again.

    "I am SO BAD *kitten* I did this not once, but twice! And I'll do it three times if I need to." *sassy bring-it face*

    But it sounds to me like you're still a little shocked about the price of the toll that taking some time off cost you. Of course it did. Breathe. Accept. Reassess. Life just insulted you, lady. You can either say, "Oh, ok, maybe you're right, I'm not cool, dum dee dum," or you can say, "...Rude!" move on, and work on your sassy bring-it face for when you're back on top.
  • mmm_drop
    mmm_drop Posts: 1,126 Member
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    I just focus on being better today than I was yesterday. A year ago, or 10 years ago, is too far back for me to worry about. You know what they say... "If you have one foot in the past and one foot in the future you end up s---ing on today.

    Couldn't have put it better myself.
  • cebreisch
    cebreisch Posts: 1,340 Member
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    *LOL* I love your post. I feel like I've lost my "badass" too!! I've been looking for it for some time. It's really hidden itself well this time.

    Every time I feel like I'm getting it back into gear, CRASH.

    I saw someone 2 weeks ago that was sooo badass that she lost her weight and gained it back and then some at least TWICE, and I think it might have even been 3 times.

    I'm sorry you've lost your badass, but am glad to hear I'm not the only one!!!

    Hang in there!!! We'll find it soon enough!!