Traded up??

Jenn_Lyn1102
Jenn_Lyn1102 Posts: 219 Member
in Chit-Chat
Ok, so... my husband and I were at a get together this weekend at his sister's house. We were having a great time, but there were some people there we had never met before. Well later on in the night, after everyone had some drinks. This guy came up to me and told me I 'traded up' pointing at my husband? I said excuse me? And he said yeah you 'traded up'. I said well of course, I know my husband is gorgeous. And he walked away? I was confused as to why he thought that was ok to say but didn't want to entertain his comment.
Anyhow, what exactly do you think he meant by that? I have tried googling and researching the term 'traded up'. But if I have it right it means he is saying my husband is 'better than me' like I am lucky to have him? Which I know that already of course, but for a complete stranger to come up to me and voice that, really bothers me.
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Replies

  • miss_jessiejane
    miss_jessiejane Posts: 2,819 Member
    He'd been drinking right? And he's not somebody you know? If that's the case, I wouldn't worry about what he meant. He may not have meant anything mean at all, and he may not have been trying to insinuate anything. That being said, "trading up" to me, means the person you're currently with seems better than the person you were with previously. But what do I know? I'm just a cranky old lady.
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    That is very very strange sounding to me.

    I have had one (female) friend half-jokingly say the exact same thing to me but she meant it like "you traded up" because I was married to a guy who looked like Drew Carey when he was fat, and now I'm divorced from him and married to a guy who looks more along the lines of a tall, fit but much younger Peter Krause (handsome actor). So she meant like traded up from the former non-hot guy to my current hot husband.

    But honestly to me it sounds like that guy doesn't even know what he is talking about...he doesn't know you or what you "traded" up/down from. And it also kind of sounds like an insult to you, the way he put it...and if that's you in your profile pic, you're beautiful.

    I don't get it.
  • BrainyBurro
    BrainyBurro Posts: 6,129 Member
    it only has one possible meaning...

    ...he mistook you for the GM of a professional sports team and gave you credit for making off season trades that landed you a higher draft pick.

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    or maybe he was drunk and mistook you for somebody else who was previously dating or married to somebody he knows. this is much less likely however.

    :tongue:
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member

    or maybe he was drunk and mistook you for somebody else who was previously dating or married to somebody he knows. this is much less likely however.

    Good call
  • Jenn_Lyn1102
    Jenn_Lyn1102 Posts: 219 Member
    Thanks for the responses girls, it's really been burning my @$$ since then. I should of been like what do you mean by that? But I was having a great time, and didn't want to entertain him like I said before. But this guy was my sister in law's neighbor, so none of us really knew him, and he doesn't know us well enough to say that really? I mean I've been with my husband for 9 years, my boyfriend before that was a HS boyfriend.

    I get what traded up means by that seltxermint that's how I assumed the term but he doesn't know us to say it that way? I took it as a dig/insult to me as well? I just wanted to clarify it.. Yeah my profile pic is me & my hubby.

    Thanks missjessieja, I shouldn't worry about it you are right. That's why I wanted to ask out loud to the world to get some honest opinions, or see if anyone else had ever heard the term.
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  • Platform_Heels
    Platform_Heels Posts: 388 Member
    He might have gotten you confused with someone else.

    Either way I wouldn't let it bother me and in fact would have probably forgotten it by now.
  • wolverine66
    wolverine66 Posts: 3,779 Member
    He'd been drinking right? And he's not somebody you know? If that's the case, I wouldn't worry about what he meant. He may not have meant anything mean at all, and he may not have been trying to insinuate anything. That being said, "trading up" to me, means the person you're currently with seems better than the person you were with previously. But what do I know? I'm just a cranky old lady.

    yeah... maybe he thought you were someone else or maybe he doesn't know what the phrase means.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    That being said, "trading up" to me, means the person you're currently with seems better than the person you were with previously.

    Yeah, this. Are you sure you've never seen this guy before? Perhaps, you dated him before and didn't recognize him and he was just trying to give his approval of your selected spouse. Or maybe, he thought you were someone else. That's all I can think.
  • Jenn_Lyn1102
    Jenn_Lyn1102 Posts: 219 Member
    You all are right, people are idiots when they drink and he could of mistaken me for someone else. And you are right, I need to just forget about it... just wanted to understand the term traded up?! I should of just punched the dude!
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    I would consider "trading up" to mean that my current partner is better than my past partner.

    Why would anyone trade down?
  • Jenn_Lyn1102
    Jenn_Lyn1102 Posts: 219 Member
    That being said, "trading up" to me, means the person you're currently with seems better than the person you were with previously.

    Yeah, this. Are you sure you've never seen this guy before? Perhaps, you dated him before and didn't recognize him and he was just trying to give his approval of your selected spouse. Or maybe, he thought you were someone else. That's all I can think.

    No clue who he was? My sister in law and her husband just moved into the area, and they were neighbors from across the street. I met his wife earlier in the evening, she works at an air force base that I work at as well. That's the only commonality we have.
    He was older than us too.. and I think he was just a drunk grump.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    he wanted to have sex with you...
  • mccindy72
    mccindy72 Posts: 7,001 Member
    Thanks for the responses girls, it's really been burning my @$$ since then. I should of been like what do you mean by that? But I was having a great time, and didn't want to entertain him like I said before. But this guy was my sister in law's neighbor, so none of us really knew him, and he doesn't know us well enough to say that really? I mean I've been with my husband for 9 years, my boyfriend before that was a HS boyfriend.

    I get what traded up means by that seltxermint that's how I assumed the term but he doesn't know us to say it that way? I took it as a dig/insult to me as well? I just wanted to clarify it.. Yeah my profile pic is me & my hubby.

    Thanks missjessieja, I shouldn't worry about it you are right. That's why I wanted to ask out loud to the world to get some honest opinions, or see if anyone else had ever heard the term.

    Don't overthink what random strangers say to you. You have no idea what's going on in their heads.
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    Yep...drunk idiot and probably thinks your husband's hot and was angry that he's straight and with you ;-)
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,021 Member
    Lol, maybe he's gay and thinks your husband is better looking than your SIL's.

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  • Jenn_Lyn1102
    Jenn_Lyn1102 Posts: 219 Member
    I never thought about that.... maybe he did want my hubby!! WOW, that makes sense... he was hitting on my man!
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  • Jenn_Lyn1102
    Jenn_Lyn1102 Posts: 219 Member
    nq4hg6.jpgDid he know the person you dated before? It's actually a sort of compliment.....

    Not that I know of? I don't know how he would of known who I dated in HS?!
  • ABsolute85
    ABsolute85 Posts: 156
    sounds like he was doing what some guys do...breaking down your confidence by making you feel like you weren't quite good enough...he probably figured you would find him and ask him what that meant, giving him another opportunity to talk to you, all the while masking his own insecurities, which are probably many judging by his behavior...

    Maybe it works on the insecure single girls...it's good that you didn't bite...
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  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,021 Member
    Technically, I think "traded up" means you traded an ex for someone better. If we're going to use sports analogies to describe dating someone who is hotter/"better" than YOU, I prefer "You outkicked your coverage."
  • Jenn_Lyn1102
    Jenn_Lyn1102 Posts: 219 Member
    I think you are right, I think he was jealous of how much fun we were having and wanted to be a grump and shut it down. I acted like it didn't faze me, but here I am Monday morning just still running it through my mind. Thanks to you all I feel a lot better just getting out there and off my chest!
  • shoneybabes
    shoneybabes Posts: 199 Member
    Drink makes people lose their filter. I wouldn't believe anything that comes from someone like that. If you don't know him, even better. His personal thoughts are his own. You cant change them and they mean nothing to you. Only your opinion and your husbands matter :)
  • pattyproulx
    pattyproulx Posts: 603 Member
    Ya, I doubt he's saying you're dating someone hotter than you.

    1 - trading is giving up something for something else.
    2 - unless that's just an incredibly flattering picture of you, it's very unlikely that a drunk guy would think that your boyfriend is better looking than you by a big enough margin to make a comment. (Guys wouldn't think "Wow, that's a really really good looking guy. What's he doing with that girl?", unless the girl is *really* unattractive - which you're not)

    Either, a) he knows your ex and thinks this new guy is way cooler than the last or b) he thinks you're someone else who dated someone much less cool than your boyfriend.
  • Jenn_Lyn1102
    Jenn_Lyn1102 Posts: 219 Member
    From his wife [9:58 AM]:
    I asked him if he remembered that and he didn't really.

    Me [9:58 AM]:
    What did he mean?

    His wife [9:59 AM]:
    I told him what he said and he said your husband is a good looking guy.

    Me [9:59 AM]:
    And I am chop liver?! HAHHAHA

    He was TOTALLY complimenting my husband, and I think into him I guess! LOL!
  • MB2MN
    MB2MN Posts: 334 Member
    Yep...drunk idiot and probably thinks your husband's hot and was angry that he's straight and with you ;-)

    Was my first thought.
  • MB2MN
    MB2MN Posts: 334 Member
    From his wife [9:58 AM]:
    I asked him if he remembered that and he didn't really.

    Me [9:58 AM]:
    What did he mean?

    His wife [9:59 AM]:
    I told him what he said and he said your husband is a good looking guy.

    Me [9:59 AM]:
    And I am chop liver?! HAHHAHA

    He was TOTALLY complimenting my husband, and I think into him I guess! LOL!

    And you're both adorable.
  • Jenn_Lyn1102
    Jenn_Lyn1102 Posts: 219 Member
    From his wife [9:58 AM]:
    I asked him if he remembered that and he didn't really.

    Me [9:58 AM]:
    What did he mean?

    His wife [9:59 AM]:
    I told him what he said and he said your husband is a good looking guy.

    Me [9:59 AM]:
    And I am chop liver?! HAHHAHA

    He was TOTALLY complimenting my husband, and I think into him I guess! LOL!

    And you're both adorable.

    Thanks you made my day MB2MN ;)

    ..and now my hubby is completely weirded out!!
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