*sigh* ugh, weight loss is hard!
Day58
Posts: 113
You don't really think about how simple it is to gain the weight... you just eat a bit more here and there and move a lot less over time. Sitting here thinking about how far I have to go is very discouraging. I've been on my journey since September 30, 2013. it's been so hard. I've had lots of bad days and some good days, but over the past 6 months I have managed to lose 13 lbs! couldn't give up the fast food since recently, still fighting with portion control, and really struggling to try to learn to exercise and have fun with it.
I feel like giving up some days, I really do! Just the other day i went over my calorie goal by 1000 but I did not give up. The next day I just kept on trucking. I have about 80 more lbs to lose but I am here. I am just sitting here thinking about all of the changes that I have to make just to look and feel better. I've been on mfp for 22 days now and I am feeling better. I haven't kept track of my inches or anything but I sleep better at night eating less fatty foods, I am less tired during the day since I'm not over eating all of the time, and I have fallen in love with Friday night stir fry at the Japanese restaurant.
Anyone felt like me before? how did you overcome being overwhelmed with the hard days? the days where you feel like the journey will never end? I can't believe that I allowed myself to gain this much weight in the first place. I mean who actually gives up on life and themselves and their health?? At least I'm here right!
I feel like giving up some days, I really do! Just the other day i went over my calorie goal by 1000 but I did not give up. The next day I just kept on trucking. I have about 80 more lbs to lose but I am here. I am just sitting here thinking about all of the changes that I have to make just to look and feel better. I've been on mfp for 22 days now and I am feeling better. I haven't kept track of my inches or anything but I sleep better at night eating less fatty foods, I am less tired during the day since I'm not over eating all of the time, and I have fallen in love with Friday night stir fry at the Japanese restaurant.
Anyone felt like me before? how did you overcome being overwhelmed with the hard days? the days where you feel like the journey will never end? I can't believe that I allowed myself to gain this much weight in the first place. I mean who actually gives up on life and themselves and their health?? At least I'm here right!
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Replies
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I think for me, the trick has been exercise.
Exercise = more food = happier me = sticking to the diet.
Is there any exercise you like?
It's hard, you need to make the choice though, more food, or no exercise..
I'm not a big fan of walking, but with my headphones on it's so much better
I also play squash a lot now with friends, I snowboard and I've got an elliptical coming to my home this week.
I don't like gyms, swimming is great but crowded in the pools here, not keen on doing club activities because of my weight.. so I've just been doing things I can deal with for now.
Good luck!0 -
I think many of us felt the exact same way when we started. It is so much easier to stick with unhealthy habits than to form new healthier ones. At the end of the day, it’s about your health and life. I love food with a passion but I flat out refuse to end up with all kind of health issues and be put on countless medications all because I couldn’t control the amount of food I shove down my throat. I will not go down that way. Many people don’t like change or leaving their comfort zone but the alternatives are far worst. Don’t expect to be prefect, especially when you are just starting. You are going to backslide into bad habits from time to time because it’s human nature. The key is to restart as many times as necessary until you get it right.0
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Losing weight is hard.
But being fat is hard too. It's hard to fit in airplane seats. It's tough getting kicked off a ride at an amusement park when the bar won't close because your stomach is in the way. It's not fun getting winded when you walk up the stairs. It's hard when your doctor tells you that you have high blood pressure and will need medication to control it. It's difficult when you have to start testing your blood sugar levels multiple times every day because you have diabetes. It's hard to shop in the plus size section in the back of the store, where the clothes are never as cute as the ones displayed up front. It's hard to find shoes that fit on your swelling feet, knowing that you can't rock those high heels anymore. It's rough when you need a knee replacement because your weight has caused so much damage to your joints.
I would rather suffer through several months of difficulty to drastically improve my life and prevent those things from happening (or from continuing to happen).
Choose your hard.0 -
I try not to look too far down the road. Focus on today. Make it your goal to do good today, worry about tomorrow, tomorrow. When you get a craving, just tell yourself "Not today". One thing that we can grab hold of immediately, if we want it, is to be proud of ourselves. Do what you can today, so that tonight when you go to bed you can look back and be happy for what you've accomplished. The feeling can get addictive :-) Good luck!0
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We all have the bad days and the days when we get tired. It's always a choice to keep going or quit.
Here's what I have learned in my 22 months on MFP:
In order to lose weight you have to be in a calorie deficit.
In order to know if you're in a calorie deficit, you have to weigh (with a scale)/measure/log your food- every bite/every day.
Exercise is important to health, but not necessary to lose weight. Find something you enjoy and do it consistently.
Eat foods you like, make healthy choices along the way, learn portion control/moderation
Meet your calorie deficit, then work on meeting your macros (protein, fat, carbs)
Have PATIENCE and don't quit.0 -
to be honest I can't say I have ever felt this was hard...well the losing weight part some of the exercise is a different story.
I am never hungry...never feel the desire to just say screw it and eat whatever is in sight but I think that has something to do with the way I view and do what I am doing.
I eat what I want in moderation..which includes takeout...fast food...chocolate...ice cream...pastries etc.
I am very rarely hungry and if I am it's close to meal time...and if I do have an exceptional hungry day (Monday) I eat food but typically don't go over maintenance...or even hit that mark (2000 calories)...I choose protien to snack on as it does keep me feeling fuller longer...and I eat on average 1700 calories a day...and still lose 3/4lb a week.0 -
I'm in the same boat as you and I've been with MFP a little longer.
There will be good days, not so good days, and flat out rotten days. You might even have days where you say "The hell with it"
I know that I'm still trying to find my groove. Some days I track, some I don't...I know that one of the answers is to take small steps. Make one change at a time.
If you try to do too much all at once, you set yourself up for failure, and I have found that to be true.
The biggest thing is..... you've managed to lose 13lbs..that's nothing to complain about !!!!
If you have to do 1 meal at a time, or 1 snack at a time, do it....
MFP members are great...remember that most of them have been where you and I are...these people are a wealth of information, and most are willing to help out.
Good luck
Kat 0 -
I think losing weight isn't easy, but it is simple. For me, once I thought of it that way, I was able to attack it much more effectively. Everyone knows how to lose weight (just like everyone knows how to gain weight), but the challenge is making the choice to put in the work on a daily basis. I love myfitnesspal because I've been able to have treats when I want, have bad days when I'm going to have them but use this tool to make sure I'm not going crazy. If I am going to eat a lot of calories on a day, I prepare for it by hitting the gym hard or eating lighter throughout the day. If I had a HORRIBLE day one day where I went over, I make up for it by doing exceedingly well for 1-2 days following. It's all about balance and that's why this website/app is such a blessing. Good luck to you on your journey! We're all here to support you and see you through to your goals. 0
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You don't really think about how simple it is to gain the weight... you just eat a bit more here and there and move a lot less over time.
Flip this around and you can say it is easy to lose weight, you just eat a bit less here and there and more a lot more over time.0 -
I've been the same way. Start off doing exercises on the Wii like Wii Fit Plus and Exerbeat, then when you get the hang of it start going to the gym. I've had days where I just wanna sit and eat a bowl of ice-cream and say screw it. But don't give up. Keep on trucking and Good Luck to ya.0
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it is definitely hard, i just started 4 weeks ago and have had some success. Don't give up and give into urges. You have to remember that during our whole life we, have been conditioned to eating what we want, having just one more bite, etc. Hard to change and be diciplined,very hard, don't give up whatever you do. Just take it down to each individual meal, you have a choice. We are all in the same boat and with you!0
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Similar to a 12 step program (or so I am told never having gone through one): Focus on 1 day at a time. Justfocus on today. I also find it motivating for me to use visualization techniques. Take a minute in the morning: close your eyes and think about how you will feel at the end of the day, how will your body feel, how will you mentally feel, try and engage as many senses as possible, having made good choices in fod, exercise, focus at work, completing a project you know you will be doing that day. Visualizing the end result before I start helps me stay focus and make those good choices through out my day.0
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It is hard, but it was always going to be hard, and that's the way it is. But just think about how you will feel even when you get half way to goal, and take each day at a time, we all have bad days when we eat things we shouldn't be. Also if you can find exercise that you like doing then keep at it and at some point it will be second nature to do it and if you get a day when you can't exercise because of illness you will crave it just like you used to crave all those naughty foods. At the minute I am on a high protein, low carb diet and doing 30 day shred dvd, I have had days when I have eaten the wrong foods and I feel really cross with myself after, but I have to mark it down as a bad day and move on. You should be pleased that you have lost 13lbs that's a great loss and just think when you have lost more, think of it less as a diet and more of you re-educating yourself to eat better and healthier, give yourself a little pat on the back, you are right you are here and that does mean something. Just now you have got your foot on the ladder you need to keep climbing and not fall off, because you will feel so much better when you make your last step and reach the top. Good luck and keep up the good work!0
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all of this is true for me as well. I haven't found it to be hard at all. I've actually wondered what's wrong with me and thought it should be harder, but it just hasn't been my experience.to be honest I can't say I have ever felt this was hard...well the losing weight part some of the exercise is a different story.
I am never hungry...never feel the desire to just say screw it and eat whatever is in sight but I think that has something to do with the way I view and do what I am doing.
I eat what I want in moderation..which includes takeout...fast food...chocolate...ice cream...pastries etc.
I am very rarely hungry and if I am it's close to meal time...and if I do have an exceptional hungry day (Monday) I eat food but typically don't go over maintenance...or even hit that mark (2000 calories)...I choose protien to snack on as it does keep me feeling fuller longer...and I eat on average 1700 calories a day...and still lose 3/4lb a week.0 -
Love your post! U typed my life. It is hard but I choose the losing weight kinda hard. Atleast ill be healthy!0
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Yup, it's hard for all of us. Every darn day. But your success should be enjoyed. You have made some changes and losing what you have to this point is an accomplishment. Acknowledge that.
Just remember, whatever you change has to be a lifestyle change. It can't just be for now. When you reach your goal, and you will as long as you keep going, then what you are doing at that point has to be what you are wiling to do for the rest of your life. Maybe not to the same intensity, because the maintenance phase is what is going to last.
It sounds like you are making small changes that are making differences. Take the day to hate it all. But tomorrow, wrap your head around what you know is working for you and start it all over again.
We are right there with you, walking that same path and feeling that same discouragement from time to time. Keep going, you are worth it!0 -
Hard? - I guess it can be. I prefer not to look at it as a 'process' that I have to go through - more a change to my way of life which will make all those other aspects of my life so much better. Food is still tasty, nice and sometimes extravagant - just that I'm in control of it - not the other way around. I no longer eat mindlessly - out of boredom or without proper thought. Everything I put in my mouth I have either prepared or purchased with care - therefore it's more appreciated.
I am trying to find ways to make this journey to better health enjoyable ( I reckon I had 50lbs to lose - 13 of those have already gone) - I certainly have more energy. Find a way of exercising that you really enjoy - perhaps with a social aspect. I walk 6 days a week - I am lucky I am surrounded by beautiful countryside. There will be some activity you enjoy and people you can share it with? Find ways of making it not a task but pleasurable.
There are difficult days - yesterday I had the nibbles all day. If I'm hungry I try and work out why, eat something nutritious, log it and then get busy - I resorted to cleaning out my kitchen drawers last evening just to distract me.
You can do this and you can enjoy getting healthy - you have to find a way to make it work for you because your new lifestyle has to last a lifetime - not just for a 'diet'. 0 -
It is a struggle but for me it is about the small incremental changes that are really starting to add up.
I was realistic about what I was willing to do calories wise so set my weight loss goal to 1.5 lbs per week, not 2. I tried the 2 level for a couple of weeks and was hungry all the time. Since I wanted to stay with this, I dropped the weight goal and am now pretty happy (and it I want to eat more, I exercise more).
I keep a list of short term goals in my head and am rewarding myself when I hit them (at 5 lb, 10lb, 15lb, etc. and then 5%, 10%, 15%, etc.). While most of the rewards are non-food related (mani/pedi, a hard copy of a book I have been eyeing, Some gadget or tool for the garden, etc. ) TBH, my reward for reaching my 15% goal will be a nice dinner out at Ruth's Chris. I will just exercise like a mad woman before and after to account for the extra cals.
I log all my food and enter the items in the AM so I know what my plan is for the day. This makes me less likely to go over since I know exactly what I am to be eating. I also bring extra lower cal snacks in my lunchbox so I have them readily on hand so I am less tempted to hit the vending machine.
I am exercising more but I eased into it. So started with walking, then added the exercise bike, then some YouTube workout and yoga videos, now I just started with weights. I am developing a weekly exercise routine that is working for me and I think it is because I didn't try to do it all at once.
Finally, I realize I am not perfect. There will be good days and bad days. I am working to make sure the good ones waaaay outnumber the bad ones and when a bad one happens, I don't let it derail me. The next day is just another opportunity to get it right.0 -
I stay motivated by the fact that some things in life are just better when you aren't extremely overweight.
Hiking, going to the park, shopping, all these things are much more fun. Clothes shopping becomes more fun. Sex is better because you have more confidence. I remember what my goal weight felt like and I use those things as motivation. The closer you get to your goal weight, the more Ty find yourself enjoying things you couldn't before. That's my motivation0 -
I find that logging everything I eat and exercise I do motivates me. Even if I gain a pound here or there, I know if I stick with it the pounds will come off. It's about replacing bad habits with good ones, one step at a time. Keep going, there will be difficult days but being fat is harder than getting where you want to be0
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I think for me, the trick has been exercise.
Exercise = more food = happier me = sticking to the diet.
Is there any exercise you like?
It's hard, you need to make the choice though, more food, or no exercise..
I'm not a big fan of walking, but with my headphones on it's so much better I also play squash a lot now with friends, I snowboard and I've got an elliptical coming to my home this week.
I don't like gyms, swimming is great but crowded in the pools here, not keen on doing club activities because of my weight.. so I've just been doing things I can deal with for now.
Good luck!
I do love walking. Its been so cold though its hard to get out and do it. I think you are right maybe exercise will help! Thanks0 -
I think many of us felt the exact same way when we started. It is so much easier to stick with unhealthy habits than to form new healthier ones. At the end of the day, it’s about your health and life. I love food with a passion but I flat out refuse to end up with all kind of health issues and be put on countless medications all because I couldn’t control the amount of food I shove down my throat. I will not go down that way. Many people don’t like change or leaving their comfort zone but the alternatives are far worst. Don’t expect to be prefect, especially when you are just starting. You are going to backslide into bad habits from time to time because it’s human nature. The key is to restart as many times as necessary until you get it right.
Thanks for the encouragement. You are so right!0 -
Losing weight is hard.
But being fat is hard too. It's hard to fit in airplane seats. It's tough getting kicked off a ride at an amusement park when the bar won't close because your stomach is in the way. It's not fun getting winded when you walk up the stairs. It's hard when your doctor tells you that you have high blood pressure and will need medication to control it. It's difficult when you have to start testing your blood sugar levels multiple times every day because you have diabetes. It's hard to shop in the plus size section in the back of the store, where the clothes are never as cute as the ones displayed up front. It's hard to find shoes that fit on your swelling feet, knowing that you can't rock those high heels anymore. It's rough when you need a knee replacement because your weight has caused so much damage to your joints.
I would rather suffer through several months of difficulty to drastically improve my life and prevent those things from happening (or from continuing to happen).
Choose your hard.
That was deep. Way deep. And an eye opener. Thank you. Thank you.0 -
We all have the bad days and the days when we get tired. It's always a choice to keep going or quit.
Here's what I have learned in my 22 months on MFP:
In order to lose weight you have to be in a calorie deficit.
In order to know if you're in a calorie deficit, you have to weigh (with a scale)/measure/log your food- every bite/every day.
Exercise is important to health, but not necessary to lose weight. Find something you enjoy and do it consistently.
Eat foods you like, make healthy choices along the way, learn portion control/moderation
Meet your calorie deficit, then work on meeting your macros (protein, fat, carbs)
Have PATIENCE and don't quit.
I wont quit! Thanks for your tips!0 -
I am part of a fantastic group called A Goal A Month. You set a monthly goal and log your weight every Friday on a spreadsheet that is public to the group. I have found this group to be absolutely wonderful, they are upbeat and always supportive. I personally find that setting smaller goals more frequently has been much better for me. If you want more info, send me a message or add me as a friend. Good luck 0
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You don't really think about how simple it is to gain the weight... you just eat a bit more here and there and move a lot less over time. Sitting here thinking about how far I have to go is very discouraging.
I think the number one problem with discouragement during dieting is that although as you astutely pointed out it is easy to put on weight by just having a little to much to eat or too little daily exercise over years when people chose to lose weight they want results right away over the period of weeks or months. Really to lose weight in a way that is healthy and long term is as "easy" as reversing this trend. Rather than eating a little to much and exercising not enough over years you just eat a little less and exercise a little more over the period of years. This can be as small of a change as substituting that one soda you drink everyday for a glass of water and making sure to walk for 20 minutes every day.
People who lose 40 pounds in 4 months with intense exercise and focus are impressive but really if you want a long term solution find some small changes that you really don't mind doing at all and just try to make that part of your life. The daily walk...avoiding soda...having a carrot instead of a snickers. Its the small but good habits that will win the day eventually.0 -
Without reading any responses - yes, of course I've felt that way. I started at 350 (possibly more) lbs. Talk about a depressingly long journey.
When I started, I started with a Whole30 challenge - not to lose weight, though I hoped I would - but mostly as a challenge. It's pretty straightforward mind over matter stuff. Don't eat these foods, for thirty days. Straight up about will-power. I effing did it! After that, it felt more approachable, easier.
At this point, I just focus on hitting a certain calorie goal, which shifts daily, depending on my exercise/movement. I try to be healthy and smart with food choices. Everything I eat is a choice I make (not to eat, to eat and work it off later or reduce calories from another meal or accept a smaller deficit and slower weight loss). Several smaller goals that become habits - stop drinking soda for a month became something I've stuck with (with very few exceptions). Eat vegetables with every meal for a week became a habit I generally stick with.
It wasn't about trying to throw myself into every dietary change for health that has ever been conceived of - it's about figuring out what works to help me lose and to help me achieve my fitness goals and how to live with that. I want to lose and keep it off. I want to feel ok with eating blue cheese and chocolate cake and enjoying a huge meal out now and then. So I've found ways to do those things while losing weight.
Some days I feel like I've not made enough progress or it's slow or I suck at it and then there are days like when I looked up and realized that I'd dropped 40 lbs. That I weigh less than I did at my wedding. That my pants literally fell off me while I was running (thankfully only in my living room). Those things keep me going. I also have smaller, incremental goals. The goal in my ticker is 65 lbs lost - my first goal (though getting under 300 will be a huge accomplishment). After that is 250. After that is 225. Then I'll evaluate.
TL;DR - yep, I've felt that way and combatted it by making small changes that are feasible and sustainable and by setting smaller goals that will get me to where I want to be.0 -
I try not to look too far down the road. Focus on today. Make it your goal to do good today, worry about tomorrow, tomorrow. When you get a craving, just tell yourself "Not today". One thing that we can grab hold of immediately, if we want it, is to be proud of ourselves. Do what you can today, so that tonight when you go to bed you can look back and be happy for what you've accomplished. The feeling can get addictive :-) Good luck!
Love this, thanks!0 -
all of this is true for me as well. I haven't found it to be hard at all. I've actually wondered what's wrong with me and thought it should be harder, but it just hasn't been my experience.to be honest I can't say I have ever felt this was hard...well the losing weight part some of the exercise is a different story.
I am never hungry...never feel the desire to just say screw it and eat whatever is in sight but I think that has something to do with the way I view and do what I am doing.
I eat what I want in moderation..which includes takeout...fast food...chocolate...ice cream...pastries etc.
I am very rarely hungry and if I am it's close to meal time...and if I do have an exceptional hungry day (Monday) I eat food but typically don't go over maintenance...or even hit that mark (2000 calories)...I choose protien to snack on as it does keep me feeling fuller longer...and I eat on average 1700 calories a day...and still lose 3/4lb a week.
I sure wish this was me0 -
My extraordinary hatred for being fat, how it looks on me, what I allowed it to cost me in life choices, and my self esteem, is what presses me through the "I'm so sick of this journey" times.
Honestly if the strength of my hatred wasn't so intense that it has always made losing weight feel like there was no choice, I'd probably be right in the "what's the point" boat.
If you don't have a clear, strong vision for your post-fat life, whatever that vision constitutes, you're almost certain not to make it. A lack of motivation is a lack of fire.0
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