no, really, you're pregnant.

stenochick
stenochick Posts: 142 Member
edited September 22 in Motivation and Support
Ok. I know I definitely need to lose weight, (I'm about 15 lbs overweight) but, seriously, what just happened pissed me off.
I was down in the front office where I work turning in some work. Another co-worker runs into me (in my mind I refer to her as the Dipstick -- she's not too bright, but I still don't excuse her remarks.)

So I'm at the front desk chit-chatting with some of the girls that work up there and Dipstick comes up and says hi, and then says, "hey, it looks like you're going to have another baby " (I just had my second child last May). I said, "no, it's just leftover fat from being pregnant." This has happened before with others so I try to let it roll off my shoulders. I do have a tummy, I concede. But she doesn't drop the subject like most people would. But she then is like, "no, really, you're going to have another baby." I said, "nope, my tubes are tied. Not having another baby; husband had prostate cancer; he's shooting blanks. Then she looks at me and is like, "aw, come on, you're having another baby (sorta wink wink nod nod, like I'm trying to keep it a secret and she wants me to confide in her.) I said, "I'm not having a baby" and walked away. Good god. Kinda a little pissed.


Okk. She just walked in my office while I"m writing this and apologized. She knew how she sounded. She assured me she was not trying to be malicious. She was trying to tell me how cute pregnant people looked, so I, in essence, was cute? Not sure I got that. But at least she owned up to her faux pas. She is forgiven.

I guess I'll still post this, but has anything like this happened to any of you out there? How do you handle it? I am very easy -going and tend not to confront people and just vent to my friends or my husband, but it certainly is a hard blow to your ego.

Melanie

Replies

  • RoadDog
    RoadDog Posts: 2,946 Member
    As a guy, I wouldn't ask a woman if she was pregnant, if her water broke in front of me.
  • Jena_72
    Jena_72 Posts: 1,057
    As a guy, I wouldn't ask a woman if she was pregnant, if her water broke in front of me.
    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: SMART MAN!!
  • AdamATGATT
    AdamATGATT Posts: 573 Member
    As a guy, I wouldn't ask a woman if she was pregnant, if her water broke in front of me.

    Ditto.

    I think every office has a "Dipstick".
  • Alita2011
    Alita2011 Posts: 265 Member
    I appreciate the respect LOL!
  • rshunk
    rshunk Posts: 167 Member
    Well you handled it better than I would have! Some people just need to get a clue!
  • paniolo5
    paniolo5 Posts: 186 Member
    Oh yeah, I feel your pain. I work in retail and years ago I was visiting an office of one of our divisions and a guy asked me when I was due. Mind you I was wearing one of THEIR company's dresses and they don't sell maternity wear. I was only about 15 pounds overweight, too. Completely agree with RoadDog - that's just one of those things you NEVER say to a woman unless she first tells someone that she is preggers. To think this girl practically argued with you is beyond ridiculous. Just keep with the sense of humor! You can't fix stupid. :grumble:
  • yellowfairy
    yellowfairy Posts: 207 Member
    I get asked this a lot-and I hate it. It is so embarrassing! I know I am overweight-I get it. Don't keep rubbing it in. Seriously-I don't look even 9 months pregnant though, so I don't know why you would think it is ok to ask. I haven't ever asked anyone if they were-just because I wouldn't want to upset them if they weren't! Grr.
  • xojox
    xojox Posts: 187 Member
    i was in a supermarket once buying a buggy for my 2yr old son, who's 'baby weight' i'm still carrying lol. When i picked it off the shelf the assistant asked whether i should be carrying it in my 'condition', to which i replied "what, diabetic?" the look on her face was a picture!!!!!! pmsl xxxx
  • pbxr
    pbxr Posts: 100 Member
    (((cyber hugs))) to you! I'm sorry that people can be so thoughtless.

    Yes, it happened to me, too. When my daughter was around 3 or 4 (she's my youngest), I ran into my old Anatomy & Physiology teacher & his wife at Lowe's. After greeting my husband & me (we were on a much needed date), he points to my stomach and says, "Are y'all going for number three?"

    His wife looked at him like he'd sprouted a second head as I quickly responded with a laugh, "Nope, just extra full & pudgy from our romantic dinner out." *wink wink*

    UGH.

    He's a nice man ~ it was just a stupid moment. Some people have more than their share, right? :wink:
  • Amylynn
    Amylynn Posts: 242 Member
    I've had many people ask me if I'm pregnant & I've never been pregnant yet. It is the most embarrassing thing that can happen to an overweight woman because not only does it make me feel bad but the dumb *kitten* that asks you that then gets embarrassed & usually follows up with an awkward comment like "oh, maybe it's just what you're wearing" as if they didn't just point out the fact that you are getting fatter. Thanks Captain Obvious.
  • skyski_tige
    skyski_tige Posts: 67 Member
    A couple was interviewing a trainer to work with both of them. The trainer walked up and touched the womans belly and asked when she was due. The lady ran out of the fitness center crying. The husband said that was the 3rd time in 2 days someone had asked her if she was pregnant. She really was not that overweight in my opinion. The funny part is that the trainer did not get the job.

    I am with RoadDog on my 'Are you pregnant' comments.
  • seemichellerun
    seemichellerun Posts: 219
    Even if a woman is in the middle of labor, you should NEVER assume she's pregnant. EVER!
  • seemichellerun
    seemichellerun Posts: 219
    The trainer walked up and touched the womans belly and asked when she was due. The lady ran out of the fitness center crying.

    On a side note, when did a pregnant belly become public property? Seriously NOT COOL to just go up and grope a total stranger. UGH!
  • jessicayoung82
    jessicayoung82 Posts: 157 Member
    My fiance once asked a waitress at our favorite resteraunt that and I just about stabbed him in the leg just as a heard the words coming out of his mouth. I knew she was not pregnant as she as waited on us for months and had not changed. Sadly, I have not been back to the resteraunt in 6 months because I am too embarassed to show my face there again. It is something that we still argue about to this day. I told him that if he EVER asked another woman that I would walk out of were ever we are and leave him there.

    To make it worse, after eating a big meal, he has even asked me that. I am fairly small, but carry all my extra weight in my tummy. When I am carrying a few extra pounds I look preggers. It drives me insane!!!!

    I would agree with the previous posts... Unless a woman tells you that she is pregnant, do NOT ask when she is due.
  • Dlibo1013
    Dlibo1013 Posts: 883 Member
    sorry I am sure it hurt, stay tough :-)
  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
    Oh that does piss me off. Not if someone just says it...........but to insist after you mentioned cancer (thank God your hubs is OK) she is an idiot.:angry:

    I never drink alcohol.........well barely never...................a couple of years ago I sat down at the counter waiting for my carry out food (prob 50 hot wings, large fry and large sweet tea:wink: back then) I see the beer tap, Michelob...........mmmmmmmmm, maybe just one.

    So I ask the dip**** for a draft Mich plz. She says "Oh you really shouldn't drink alcohol!:noway: !!"
    I said "And why is that, pray tell??"

    She says in a condesending tone, "Well it isn't good for the baby!!"

    I stopped for a second................Looked right at her and loudly said (I knew the other employees) "EFF THAT, it won't KILL it!!"

    Well she swallowed her tongue, the place broke out in laughter and I got a free beer.

    People can be so STOOOOOPID!!
  • asltiffm
    asltiffm Posts: 521 Member
    I've never had it happen to me, thank goodness. But I was at a store one day and 2 ladies were talking to each other. One was heavy set and the other was pretty large. They start talking about this rocking chair and one woman asks the other woman how far along she is. The large lady told the woman that she wasn't pregnant. The other woman apologized looking mortified. The large woman said not to worry about it that she gets it all the time. Was even laughing about it. I would not have handled it so graciously. I would have left crying.
  • CarrieAbbey
    CarrieAbbey Posts: 378 Member
    As a guy, I wouldn't ask a woman if she was pregnant, if her water broke in front of me.
    [/quote

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: That was too funny. ]
  • poeticpurl
    poeticpurl Posts: 126 Member
    The trainer walked up and touched the womans belly and asked when she was due. The lady ran out of the fitness center crying.

    On a side note, when did a pregnant belly become public property? Seriously NOT COOL to just go up and grope a total stranger. UGH!

    Ditto
  • Ashley_Panda
    Ashley_Panda Posts: 1,404 Member
    Well you handled it much better than I have in the past. I left a lady in tears at wal-mart for asking me this question. :)
  • mmjf39
    mmjf39 Posts: 1
    My mother stated that my clothing choices made me look pregnant and that I shouldn't wear certain things because of what others would think. I cannot believe this came from my mother.
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