Am I obsessed with dieting? Is that really all that bad???

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kcm105
kcm105 Posts: 50 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
Sorry, this one is a little long...

People close to me are starting to think I'm a little obsessed with diet and exercise. And maybe I am. So what?

I don't feel obsessed. I feel FOCUSED.

I'm really sick of people saying things like "oh, one cookie won't hurt." They're right, one cookie won't hurt. And I've certainly had my share of cookies since I started my most recent weight loss journey. But what they don't understand is that one cookie every time I'm offered a cookie WILL hurt. I have to learn to say no on a consistent basis and save the yeses for the special occasions on which I actually deserve a cookie!

What people don't understand is that if I were a person who could just have a cookie and get on with my life, I wouldn't be in this position in the first place. I also don't have the wherewithal to skip a few workouts then just hop right back on the fitness bandwagon. I have to be 100% focused or it just doesn't work for me.

Is this a bad thing? I say no. I'm not unhappy. I don't actually obsess over what I eat or what workout I'm doing tonight. If I go over on calories here and there I don't beat myself up. If I don't lose for a week or two, life goes on. But I'm never NOT thinking about it either. It's an angel (or devil) on my shoulder, with me at all times, making sure I don't forget how I got here in the first place. Keeping me focused!!!!!
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Replies

  • dmenchac
    dmenchac Posts: 447 Member
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    I know exactly how you feel. There is a difference between being focused and being obsessed
  • J_adoreDior_
    J_adoreDior_ Posts: 57 Member
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    =] :laugh: The weak/lazy call it an obsession, but it’s just plain ol dedication.
    My peers/ friends say the same about me ... I guess they really don't know what consistency look like.
    ! :glasses:
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
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    What people don't understand is that if I were a person who could just have a cookie and get on with my life, I wouldn't be in this position in the first place. I also don't have the wherewithal to skip a few workouts then just hop right back on the fitness bandwagon. I have to be 100% focused or it just doesn't work for me.

    I'm actually going to say that this ISN'T good. Don't get me wrong, it sounds like you're doing alright, and focus is good. But try making fitness part of your life rather than a bandwagon you're on, and you WILL be able to skip a few workouts and hop right back on because it's your lifestyle, not just something you're 100% focused on until you finally fall off. I've been working out at least twice a week for three years now and if I want to take a week off, it's easy enough to get started the next week since it's part of my life now.
  • loubidy
    loubidy Posts: 440 Member
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    Yip >:( I went on a night out and chose to drive because I couldn't afford to waste so many calories on alcohol at that time. The looks people gave me when my answer to not drinking was that I was loosing weight were hideous so I started saying I had to drive early in the morning and didn't want to get done for drink driving.

    In terms of food I have needed to just get rude. No I don't want one.
  • kcm105
    kcm105 Posts: 50 Member
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    What people don't understand is that if I were a person who could just have a cookie and get on with my life, I wouldn't be in this position in the first place. I also don't have the wherewithal to skip a few workouts then just hop right back on the fitness bandwagon. I have to be 100% focused or it just doesn't work for me.

    I'm actually going to say that this ISN'T good. Don't get me wrong, it sounds like you're doing alright, and focus is good. But try making fitness part of your life rather than a bandwagon you're on, and you WILL be able to skip a few workouts and hop right back on because it's your lifestyle, not just something you're 100% focused on until you finally fall off. I've been working out at least twice a week for three years now and if I want to take a week off, it's easy enough to get started the next week since it's part of my life now.

    I don't disagree, but I have to get to that place by being 100% on board for awhile. I realize that such a strict workout regimen is unsustainable in the long run, but until I feel like working out is just something I do, that it's part of my lifestyle, I have to focus on making it happen consistently. I hope to get to where you are someday, but I'm not there yet.
  • eileen0515
    eileen0515 Posts: 408 Member
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    Dedication and focus has been my mantra as I have achieved my goals. If someone wants to call that obsessive, maybe they should examine their own health and fitness efforts. I call it success! And...a self created lifestyle to be proud of.
  • monicapatituccijones
    monicapatituccijones Posts: 68 Member
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    People are self-focused. They don't realize you're being offered cookies all day long.
  • euronorris
    euronorris Posts: 211 Member
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    People are self-focused. They don't realize you're being offered cookies all day long.

    This.

    Also, having others join in with their guilty pleasure makes them feel less guilty about indulging themselves.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,639 Member
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    Obsessive would be having something be more important than ANYTHING else in your life. So if you're not that concerned about going over here and there, then I wouldn't think it's obsession.

    One thing that can be bad though is that some people who get focused on weight loss become criticizers of others and their lifestyles. If that refusal of a cookie is all you do, then fine, but if it becomes "do you know what you're really eating?" remark, then it could be a problem.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
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    I think it's about perspective and perception...

    You're super focused right now and that's working for you but since it's not your "normal" behavior, it's going to seem odd and maybe even disconcerting to those around you and be perceived as an obsession. Also, if it's all you talk about and you're always on your phone logging or looking up calories/nutrtional info, that might be getting annoying and comes off as obsessive.

    On the other hand, similar to what's mentioned above, some folks may be wishing they were as focused and determined as you but as they're not ready to put in the effort, it's easier to make it seem like what you're doing is out of the ordinary and therefore call it an "obsession".

    Not knowing you or your friends, it's hard to say but these seem to be the typical reasons.

    ETA: When asked if you want a cookie, just say no thanks and if they insist maybe say someting like "I just ate, I'm ok, really, but thanks", rinse repeat. Don't mention that you're counting calories or trying to lose weight
  • broox80
    broox80 Posts: 1,195 Member
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    People tell me I am obsessed. I tell them to suck it!!!
  • Beezil
    Beezil Posts: 1,677 Member
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    The light is either on or it's off... for me, that is. I think many people are that way. It's either 100% or none. If I can't do something right, I usually just shut down and say screw it, which is a ****ty way to handle a lot of things in life, but one's health is not one of those things, imo...
  • sodakat
    sodakat Posts: 1,126 Member
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    You can accept the cookie then set it down somewhere, or take a nibble and set it down. I don't think people really care all as much as we think. My husband never finishes anything he eats and will "forget" to eat. Sometimes he just wants to share something he has that is really good with me, and if I just nibble it and say how good it is, that is enough. Sometimes I really don't want any of the item because I don't think one piece will be enough. Then I say "not now, maybe later".
  • ottermotorcycle
    ottermotorcycle Posts: 654 Member
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    You're making a big change, and it's probably quite different from the way you used to be. You're somehow not the same "you" that they always loved, so they say you're obsessed with your new life... but you've made a lifestyle change, and you have conviction. They'll get used to it.

    You've got your head on straight, OP. You're not saying "I can't eat any cookies ever." You're saying "Cookies are not helping me get closer to my goals, so I will limit my intake of them."
  • jennbuck22
    jennbuck22 Posts: 17 Member
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    I think it's great you are so focused.

    I too have been totally focused this past month! The thing is, if I'm not totally focused I won't succeed. Call it obsessed, that's fine! Being obsessed about a healthier lifestyle sounds fantastic to me.............And if you are anything like me, you've had enough cookies in the past to last you a lifetime;)

    I've only told my husband, best friend, 1 coworker and my mom about my "diet". Because honestly I don't want anyone else's opinion!

    When someone asks me if I want pizza or a cookie, I just say oh I brought my lunch or I had a huge breakfast. No need for them to know my business. Hopefully they will know soon enough when these pounds come off:)
  • nineteentwenty
    nineteentwenty Posts: 469 Member
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    People mistake discipline for obsession to make a point all the time, it just means that your progress and dedication to your program is remarkable enough for them to notice :) Keep up the good work!
  • lindabeth333
    lindabeth333 Posts: 130 Member
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    I am also feeling very focused - could feel slightly obsessed - but just starting and need to lose over 100 pounds - I have a lot to learn and many new habits to embrace - it is time consuming to exercise, cook healthy and track what I am eating but I feel that right now - this is my priority and its ok that others have to figure out that things have changed. Keep going!
  • kcm105
    kcm105 Posts: 50 Member
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    I am also feeling very focused - could feel slightly obsessed - but just starting and need to lose over 100 pounds - I have a lot to learn and many new habits to embrace - it is time consuming to exercise, cook healthy and track what I am eating but I feel that right now - this is my priority and its ok that others have to figure out that things have changed. Keep going!

    You're right. It is time consuming. I think that's a lot of what people don't understand. Planning meals, cooking, weighing/measuring everything, logging, exercise. It's not something I can just dabble in. I wish I was someone who could just make smart choices on my own, but I'm not.

    So good to hear I'm not crazy! Well, not too crazy anyway. :happy:
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,868 Member
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    There is a fine line between living a lifestyle that is fitness and nutritionally driven and turning that into an unhealthy obsession. If you feel guilty about missing a workout here and there or feel guilty about eating certain foods, etc you are probably at minimum on the obsession side of things.

    Nutrition and fitness are very important, but life is all about balance...these things should be a part of your life...and a big one to boot, but they shouldn't be all consuming. You are not going to be 100% bang on all of the time...you just aren't. You're going to miss workouts...**** happens...sometimes you just don't feel good, sometimes work or other obligations get in the way...sometimes you just need a breather...if you can accept these things as inevitibilities and move on then it's really no biggie and it's not going to be an issue to resume your fitness regimen the next day or week or whatever. People who overly obsess tend to get derailed and defeated by such inevitibilities because they really haven't learned how to have a healthy relationship with their fitness and they're not really seeing the bigger picture that is the whole of their lifestyle...they're stuck in the minutia.
  • psuLemon
    psuLemon Posts: 38,401 MFP Moderator
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    There is a fine line between living a lifestyle that is fitness and nutritionally driven and turning that into an unhealthy obsession. If you feel guilty about missing a workout here and there or feel guilty about eating certain foods, etc you are probably at minimum on the obsession side of things.

    Nutrition and fitness are very important, but life is all about balance...these things should be a part of your life...and a big one to boot, but they shouldn't be all consuming. You are not going to be 100% bang on all of the time...you just aren't. You're going to miss workouts...**** happens...sometimes you just don't feel good, sometimes work or other obligations get in the way...sometimes you just need a breather...if you can accept these things as inevitibilities and move on then it's really no biggie and it's not going to be an issue to resume your fitness regimen the next day or week or whatever. People who overly obsess tend to get derailed and defeated by such inevitibilities because they really haven't learned how to have a healthy relationship with their fitness and they're not really seeing the bigger picture that is the whole of their lifestyle...they're stuck in the minutia.

    This is what I would say too. Fitness and health is not just for a specific amount of time and if you stop yourself from enjoying special occasions, then it's an issue. My friend is leaving my company this week and you better bet I will be slamming down on some Korean BBQ like its my job. Does that happen often.. nope, so when it does happen, I want to enjoy it. Will I lose this week, probably not, but it's ok because eating with my friend is more important than losing every week. Now do I make better decisions when I go out to dinner with my wife or friends.. absolutely. I try to prelog calories to make sure i hit my needs and fit within my goals. If it's restaurant not in the database, then I aim for stuff like fish/steak and veggies and estimate.

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