Can someone please tell me what I a doing wrong?
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Your diary shows exactly why i think anyone severely overweight should NOT do IIFYM or eating the same foods that got you big in moderation. It just doesnt work.
My advice: get you some whole foods...chicken breast, salad, green veggies, brown rice, watermelon, strawberries etc and fix up your diet.
Fitting a slice of little Cesars pizza and fudge brownie ice cream wont cut it. After a certain point you can have those foods for a free meal but for now you need to cut them out.
What does IIFYM mean?0 -
You remind me so much of myself when I started this journey! My husband is like yours, it took a health scare (he almost died) before he would even consider changing some of his diet. I fix healthy food now and if he doesn't want to eat it then he fixes himself something and me and the kids eat healthy. You don't need to throw it away, save it and have it for lunch the next day. Its hard to change your old habits, don't try to do it all at once, change a little bit at a time. There are some good web sites with recipes for healthier versions of your favorite foods. Take it one day at a time. I am bad about eating in the evenings, so if it is 10 pm and I want a peanut butter and jelly sandwich I tell myself no, not today and I will have it for breakfast. Feel free to add me as a friend!0
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Thank you all for your words. I know not all of them were kind, but that is what I asked for and needed. It was a very strong reality check. My husband has been asking me the same thing when I say I am not loosing. The funny thing is that I needed to hear it from all of you to make it sink in.
Just to answer some of the questions though...
Do I not realize why I am not losing? Yeah I guess deep down I realize why I am not losing. I think I had the blinders on. I mean some of the days I barely went over my calories and in my head that meant I was fine. I know that wasnt the correct way to think. I also think I shouldnt be eating my calories burned back even if MFP says its okay.
Do I feed my children and husband this junk? Yep, and you know what? I wouldnt if they didnt push for it so much. My husband is a food addict and really needs this site (see profile picture). He is probably up another 20lbs from when that was taken. I have asked him to be on bored with me several times and he just isnt. He is addicted to pizza and junk food. I dont actually like either. Ive come to hate pizza too! My problem is that when I make an effort and cook healthy meals, they often get tossed in the trash and then he eats some kind of junk anyway. Now I know this is about me and not him but it is really hard to see money go to waste like that. At least I know they are eating when its fast food. Stupid mindset and I am going to work on it.
The big McDonalds breakfast yesterday was just stupid and I know it. The sandwich and extra hash brown were leftovers from my daughter. I was always taught not to throw food away as a child so I ended up eating hers. I know this train of thought is why I am obese. This is also the reason I dont make my kids clean their plates. I do not want to pass this lifestyle onto them.
I'm lucky because only one of my kids is old enough to see me struggle at this point. But, the others will see it sooner or later if I (and my husband) dont get it into check soon.
Again, I am very thankful for all the responses and am going to try to implement the advice. If any of you would like to friend me to keep me motivated that would be amazing. Thanks!
ETA: I forgot to mention that I do have a food scale and use it as much as possible. I was just under the impression (before this post) that I could measure using measuring cups and spoons. I know better now
You've gotten some great advice and I wasn't going to add to it but here is something
Start small by adding in healthier foods for breakfast and snack. Then go to lunch afternoon snack, dinner. Eat 3 meals and 2-3 snacks In smaller portions and the you won't eat so much at each meal. It's hard it took me awhile before I could do smaller portions and feel full. But u will get there. Keep in mind ur habits are also ur families habits. I am a mom of 3 kiddos 7, 3, and 18 months. My daughters help me pick out our fruits and veggies and make salads.
I love dark chocolate and eat it on a regular basis. Also I have gone to making my own smoothies. Frozen berries milk and a small amount of sugar to taste my kids love it and so do I. Also frozen bananas and milk or almond milk.
Tip when u go grocery shopping before you put it in the fridge cut up ur veggies and fruits and put them in bags portioned out. Feel free to add me. Good luck to you and small steps in the right direction will be more successful than doing an overhaul that makes u overwhelmed.0 -
Sorry must be my phone. how can I start my own thread ?0
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Too much processed and fast food. Your sodium is sky high, plus you are over every day. Cut out fast food and processed food, plus weigh everything you eat and track it. Reducing sodium alone should result in a loss.0
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I can guarantee you will lose weight by doing this:
-Unlimited low glycemic veggies
-No more then 6oz of protein (chicken or fish)
-No alcohol
-No Sugar
-No Artificial Sweetener
-No Wheat (except 1/2 cup of brown rice per day)
-No Dairy (except for 1 5.3oz plain yogurt per day)
The first 3 days will be a killer as your body detoxes, but after you will feel amazing and the pounds will literally fall off.
god that sounds boring...
Where on this planet do they make brown rice out of wheat ?0 -
Thank you all for your words. I know not all of them were kind, but that is what I asked for and needed. It was a very strong reality check. My husband has been asking me the same thing when I say I am not loosing. The funny thing is that I needed to hear it from all of you to make it sink in.
Just to answer some of the questions though...
Do I not realize why I am not losing? Yeah I guess deep down I realize why I am not losing. I think I had the blinders on. I mean some of the days I barely went over my calories and in my head that meant I was fine. I know that wasnt the correct way to think. I also think I shouldnt be eating my calories burned back even if MFP says its okay.
Do I feed my children and husband this junk? Yep, and you know what? I wouldnt if they didnt push for it so much. My husband is a food addict and really needs this site (see profile picture). He is probably up another 20lbs from when that was taken. I have asked him to be on bored with me several times and he just isnt. He is addicted to pizza and junk food. I dont actually like either. Ive come to hate pizza too! My problem is that when I make an effort and cook healthy meals, they often get tossed in the trash and then he eats some kind of junk anyway. Now I know this is about me and not him but it is really hard to see money go to waste like that. At least I know they are eating when its fast food. Stupid mindset and I am going to work on it.
The big McDonalds breakfast yesterday was just stupid and I know it. The sandwich and extra hash brown were leftovers from my daughter. I was always taught not to throw food away as a child so I ended up eating hers. I know this train of thought is why I am obese. This is also the reason I dont make my kids clean their plates. I do not want to pass this lifestyle onto them.
I'm lucky because only one of my kids is old enough to see me struggle at this point. But, the others will see it sooner or later if I (and my husband) dont get it into check soon.
Again, I am very thankful for all the responses and am going to try to implement the advice. If any of you would like to friend me to keep me motivated that would be amazing. Thanks!
ETA: I forgot to mention that I do have a food scale and use it as much as possible. I was just under the impression (before this post) that I could measure using measuring cups and spoons. I know better now
I have to say that this post actually got me a little choked up. When I first read this thread I had the same thought as everyone else...is she delusional? But everyday I see tons of posts of this nature where people ask what they are doing wrong and then don't listen to a word of advice that is given to them, but go out of their way to defend their horrible decisions. It takes a lot of maturity to understand that you are going to get harsh criticism when you open yourself up like that to strangers on the internet, but at the end of the day, the majority of them really are trying to help. I am glad that you can see this.
The best advice that I can give you at this point is to have a look around the forums. There is a lot of good advice out there and educating yourself is the first step. Create a group of good friends that you find you have something in common with and give each other support. Lastly, ignore all of the negative crap. It will only bring you down.
Obviously you know that you have a long way to go at making some of these changes in your lifestyle and, ultimately, your family's. Try not to do too much at once or you may end up overwhelmed as will your family be. You need to have them on board, not just for your sake, but for their own. Try to incorporate small changes, and maybe you don't even tell them about it because they may resist. Just do little things one day at a time to improve your habits. Also, exercise is good for your overall health, but when it comes to weight loss, diet is the most important factor. Don't let exercise give you a reason to overeat.
I wish you all the best!0 -
Daaaaaaaaaaang, I like junk food just as much as the next person. But yea, that's overboard. You need to put some healthier meals in your day so that you can save room for the junk. Forget the "clean eating" crap. You like your food "dirty"..so do I!! That's perfectly fine, AS LONG AS IT FITS INTO YOUR CALORIES!!!! You could eat mcdonalds all day, as long as you don't go over your set amount of calories, and you'd still lose weight. OJ..ehhh, forget it...way too many calories..Drink water or unsweet tea....throw some sweet & low and lemon in your tea...EXCELLENT!!! My fav meal is a grilled chicken breast or grilled chicken tenders...broccoli, and a baked potato..I even put butter and sour cream on my potato. You don't have to feel like you are depriving yourself of the things you like to eat....this is what I am just learning. You dont have to feel like all you can eat is fruits and veggies...Eat what you want. In moderation, and within your calorie goal. Good Luck, and feel free to add me if you'd like!0
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You're getting some great advice.
Regarding your husband, make healthier food/choices for you and your kids and if he won't get on board then let him source/make his own food and tell him to eat it away from you.
If he won't then you need to have a serious talk with him.0 -
This is your 4th thread hijack with the same exact post..............if you really want an answer then start your own threadI'm on the same boat
I NEED HELP !!
Please feel free to look at my diary and tell me what I am doing wrong !
I started working out jan 10th 2014 we are now in April 2014 I have only lost 2 pounds !!
I do see more muscle and have lost an over all total of
8 -10 inches off my entire body but the weights just not coming off .
I stay in my calorie range as much as possible . Between 1,200-1,300 sometimes a little over depending on my workouts .
I work out 5 days a week doing mostly body weight exercises or weights through fitnessblender .com I might skip a day if I'm really sore or not feeling well .
I do lack entering foods on weekends but I still keep an eye on what I'm eating .
I eat fast food a lot since I'm out a lot but I eat in moderation for example I'll have a bottle of water a mcchicken no bread and no sauces just the chicken and lettuce only.
I'm working on my water intake but overall water is the only thing I drink besides plain sugarless iced coffee or a pre workout.
I am healthy no health issues but vitamin d deficiency which I have been taking vitamins for .
Any suggestions I'm willing to hear all your opinions anything could help .
Thanks in advance .:)
Edited by jennifer8989 On April 3, 2014 4:51 PM
If you are serious; you need to open your diary for anyone to have a look at it......0 -
Hugs to ya!!!! I used to eat fast food everyday when I first started. What I did was look at the webpage of every place before I decided what to order. Most of the time I had my Burger and a side salad. If I was craving Popeye's Chicken I ate the chicken, half of a small side, and No biscuit or drink...I learned the beauty in Thin crust Pizza. Way less calories and carbs.
You can have your fast food, but not all day, frozen hash browns are like 90 calories, they taste exactly the same as McDonalds' if you bake them with cooking spray. You can make the EggMcmuffin at home. If you go there for breakfast order the eggmcmuffin,hash brown and coffee. That's 450 calories...
I am also the QUEEN of the Kid's meal When I Must have my fast food...especially at Panda Express! I can get full on a kids meal,if not then I add a side salad or soup.Good Luck hun!0 -
Do we have the same husband?
I know how hard it is when you don't have your spouse on board with you. My husband needs to lose about 100 pounds - he eats the food I have in the house, but then I see the credit card bills from when he goes out - Jimmy John's, Taco Bell, McDonalds, KFC...
Anyway, I'd advise that you stop enabling the junk. Start cooking meals at home - even if it's just starting with 2-3 days a week. Crockpots are awesome. It's a lot harder to cram in 1000 calories per meal when it's homemade stuff.
Stock your fridge with fresh veggies, fruit, yogurt, etc. Use that for the mindless eating. Again, it's a lot harder to destroy your diet when you're eating bell peppers and hummus instead of cake.
Drink water/tea/coffee only (just watch your sugar/creamer). Cut up fruit and put it in your water if you need some flavor.0 -
Hi I know your frustration. When you feel like you doing everything thing you can to be healthy but it doesn't seem to be working. however ....I looked over your food diary and your sodium is pretty high... You maybe want to try cutting some of your salt to see if that will get the scale moving. Best of luck to you !!!!0
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I spent four years in a relationship with a man that was addicted to food. I was too. Going out to eat together and eating grand meals of ridiculous caloric portions was a way that we bonded and got close. I tried to lose weight several times while we were dating, and always ended up quitting because of the strain it caused in our relationship.
I will forever remember the day he came home with a box of donuts because he knew I was having a hard day that day, and how upset he was when I thanked him for the donuts, but told him I needed to learn to cope with my stress in a different way.
I can't tell you how to fix those relationship problems, but YOU MUST fix them.0 -
The sandwich and extra hash brown were leftovers from my daughter. I was always taught not to throw food away as a child so I ended up eating hers.
I hear you. My boys are the same way, but now I plan for it. I will order their food, and just coffee for me. Then if they each eat half their sandwich,I'll eat the remainder, so there's my breakfast, and no food wasted. If they eat everything, then I order myself something.
It's stressful and probably counterproductive to try to make huge sweeping changes at once. First try to just ACCURATELY log everything. Work with your lifestyle. If that includes a lot of fast food, just try to eat less and choose healthier options. McD Egg McMuffin, side of apple slices, and coffee or water is a great breakfast! Stay in a deficit and stick to it. Try to cook more at home if you can. Just keep at it.0 -
You've gotten some great advice in this thread. As far as cooking goes, healthy food doesn't have to be boring or taste bad (sounds like your husband thinks it might have to be this way). I cook for my family every day, but we regularly eat cheeseburgers, tacos, spaghetti with meat sauce, tuna casserole, and all sorts of other "child friendly" food. (Of course, we also eat quite a bit of grilled chicken and veggies.) Once your family figures out that healthy doesn't equal tasting bad, I bet they'll be a lot more on-board.0
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A lot of good advice, I will add to add water to your diet if you don't already. You go way over in sodium just about everyday and a decent amount too. Good luck!0
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You might want to cut back to only eating back 1/2 of your workout calories. I also checked out your food diary, maybe up your protein a little more and reduce the carbs and fat just a little bit. Good Luck!0
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I just keep thinking about this. You may not be able to change your entire family's eating preferences in one swoop, but you must have some meals to yourself, right? In my current relationship, I eat breakfast and lunch on my own (usually at work) and eat lunch with my significant other.
Is it possible to focus on making good breakfast and lunch choices when you are at work, and come home and maybe indulge a little more at home for dinner? And then slowly work on getting the rest of your family on the right track? I have a very demanding job and am very busy. I eat a lot of prepackaged food to make things easier. I usually eat two packets of instant oatmeal at my desk around 8, then I eat a yogurt container, at my desk, at about 10:30. At one, I eat a frozen TV dinner of some sort. I really like the Marie Callender's ones (anything but the pot pies is usually less than 500 calories, and more filling than stupid lean cuisines). In the afternoon, I usually have some kind of snack, around 150 calories. If you ate the above (or whatever works for you around the same calorie value) - you'd have eaten about 870 calories. Then you could go home and eat 1000 calories a night for dinner with your family, if you wanted! I am in no way saying eat like me. I'm just trying to give an example of how you could eat a lot, more healthfully, during the day, in a simple way, and indulge more with your family until you can get them on track too!
As far as getting your family on track - I have two suggestions. The first is that maybe don't focus so much on cooking "healthy" food, but focus on getting your family, and yourself, to eat proper portions. Second, if you mentioned it, I don't remember how old your kids are, but why not try and get them involved more? Take them grocery shopping - have them pick out a few things they think they would like to try at home! Buy the small pre-made personal pizza crusts, a jar of pizza sauce, and some toppings, and have personal pizza night at home.0 -
I know you love your kids and it is easier to give in to what they want but you are killing them slowly..... really, you are. The only thing they eat is junk. They are going to end up with diabetes and be obese. Everyone else keeps saying to do this for yourself but I really think you have to do this for your kids. Your husband is a grown up he has to make is own decisions, but you can get real with him and tell him that you are scared because you love him and want him around for a long, long time and the why he is taking care of himself is only going to lead to health problems, if he doesn't already have them...
It is your responsibility as a parent to take care of those kids, sometimes this means not giving them what they want. Use McD's/Pizza Hut as a reward for amazing performance rather than an every day occurrence.
I am also a very busy mom with 4 kids (3 at home, 1 at college) and I work full-time. I still make time to make healthier meals for my family. My kids love McD's and BK but that is limited to like never...maybe really special circumstances. We go to family restaurants (same cost for a kids meal $6) and choose healthy options for meals when we dine out. My kids love fried chicken so I do oven fried chicken - so much better for you and they like pizza too - do build your own pizza nights with sandwich thins, sauce and cheese - much better for you... bake your own chicken wings with sauces or rubs...so much better than the fried crap at restaurants...there are ways that are very easy to cook for your self and family, very similar foods made differently that are yummy. The internet have so many recipes that you can use to make similar foods healthier - try www.skinnytaste.com
I hope for your sake and your kids that you get this worked out. Good luck!0 -
OP, you can still eat your exercise calories back as the program intends, just edit the amounts give to half or 75% by multiplying by 0.5 or 0.75 to get the lower number and only eat back that much. It's not going to do you any good in the end to have too high of a calorie deficit and won't be realistic if you don't plan on chanigng your eating habits. And trust me, that's not a judgement - I don't exactly eat clean either.
Which brings me to my next point. It's all well and good that your husband is a junk food junkie. You can't force him to change. However, if you're the one doing the cooking, there are things you can start doing. I've adapted a lot of our favorite recipes to make them healthier because initially I got a lot of flack from my Hubs for trying to "force" him to eat healthy. I made swaps he never even noticed by hiding the packaging and he couldn't tell the difference. Eventually I stopped hiding the packages and if he balked I said something to the effect of "surprise, you've been eating that for months now and didn't even know...healthy does not necessarily mean tasteless".
And if you go out to eat, let them have what they want (within reason) and you make better choices. If you get any flak for it, just keep saying you're trying to be healthier or whatever. And maybe eventually as you gain success with weight loss, he'll get on board. Won't comment on your kids because I'm not a parent...0 -
FYI you can order ore or two "Round Eggs" at McDonalds. (Mc Muffin -cheese-ham-muffin). I learned this when I had to change my order because of gluten!0
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