I need help. I Keep failing :(

conquertheself
conquertheself Posts: 91 Member
in Motivation and Support
Hello,

So I am a little overweight for my age. My body type is what is called plus size. Big bust, big thighs and fat on my tummy. I am not considered obese but I do have fat I want to loose! Like 30 pounds. I have been trying for years but am always in the same spot. I have a problem with eating and working out. Because of my big bust I cant do as many workouts as I want to and I get tired much faster; it feels heavy when you got a big chest. As for eating, I am very healthy and I enjoy healthy food but I have the biggest sweet tooth ever. In fact my whole family does. If there is anything I can eat everyday, it would be chocolate or anything sweet. Even though I eat 4 small meals a day and drink so much green tea, I always have to have a desert; I even try healthy deserts which taste amazing! I never seem to drop beyond my water weight. Its ridiculous and I often stop sweet food then a week or two later I binge out on them. It's an ongoing cycle. I do not gain but neither do I loose. What do I do? I really want to stop sweets! I want a nicer and stronger yet more defined body. It's awful how I cant control my sweet tooth. ITS NOT HARD BUT IT IS DIFFICULT. I REALLY NEED A WAY TO BOOST MY METABOLISM AND TO JUST STOP EATING OR MUNCHING ON ANYTHING SWEET. (NUT BUTTERS AND CHOCOLATE ARE THE HARDEST TO LET GO OF AND THEY ARE THE FATTIEST) :(

Replies

  • MostlyWater
    MostlyWater Posts: 4,294 Member
    Constant reminders. Fitness magazines. Self help books. Like minded friends. Healthy foods around the house.

    We can't do it alone. And it's a lifelong struggle, too.
  • conquertheself
    conquertheself Posts: 91 Member
    It is definitely a lifelong struggle. I think its because I feel alone in this; It makes it more of a struggle then it actually is. Thanks for the reminder :)
  • Pamela_June
    Pamela_June Posts: 342 Member
    You are not alone in this journey... we all hit bumps once in a while... we just need to keep moving forward.
  • rompydompy
    rompydompy Posts: 54 Member
    Take this tenderly, because typed out it sounds harsher than I mean: Your bust has NOTHING to do with how much you exercise. That is an excuse. If you can walk to the candy cabinet, you can exercise. I've got some big bazoombas too, but I tape those puppies down and go to town-- either on a treadmill or literally walking around town.

    You CAN have a sweet tooth, and lose weight. Hell, I had a cadbury creme egg two days in a row and stayed within my calorie limits each day.

    My guess is that you don't want it badly enough yet. I've said the same things you have numerous times over the past ten years. Steadily gained, but slowly enough that I continued to say I was "maintaining, but not losing." It took a real kick in the butt for me to take the leap and follow something sustainable, and be successful at it. And I'm still in the beginning stages-- the "hard" part-- and you know what? It's not so bad. I had real, full fat lay's potato chips today with lunch. My food diary is public, feel free to peruse. Small changes are enough to get results if you truly like healthy food. But you MUST be willing to make SOME changes, including limiting your sweets and GETTING EXERCISE.

    You can do it. But you have to be ready, and it's really hard to know if you're ready until you're in the midst of meaningful change. Good luck. And invest in a really good bra; get yourself fitted at a boutique (NOT VS). :)
  • Lizzy622
    Lizzy622 Posts: 3,705 Member
    Water exercises. My poor daughter has the same problem. I have spent lots of money on what look like torture devices (DD sports bras). She is most comfortable and can workout longest in the pool. If you have access to one it is the best.
  • JesterMFP
    JesterMFP Posts: 3,596 Member
    I eat chocolate every day. Every single day. Count your calories, make sure you get a great balance of nutrition otherwise, and fit it into your day. Be active. Appropriate portion sizes. Stop trying to be too restrictive as it obviously causes you to binge (which is a very common thing and nothing to be ashamed of).

    Get a decent sports bra or do exercise (such as swimming) where you don't have to jump up and down.
  • willjean
    willjean Posts: 29 Member
    I started doing Focus T-25 10-weeks ago and I've great success! Part of the program, like many of them, is to take before pictures of yourself so I did that.

    One of my problem areas was "back fat"... they key word is "was". Whenever I didn't feel like working out or I was craving "X" (fill in the blank), I would look at my "back fat" picture and ask myself "Is "X" (fill in the blank) worth it? Do I want to have "back fat" this time next month, next year or for the rest of my natural life????"

    Whatever I wanted was NEVER worth the disappointment I would feel if let myself down so I'd put down "X" (seriously) and go do my workout.

    Those pictures and my desire to look and feel better meant more to me then my need to fill a craving for candy, pizza, chocolate....wine, you name it.

    Try making a decision that being a healthy you is more important then chocolate. Take some pictures and remind yourself "Oh yeah, this is why I'm choosing not to eat chocolate right now".

    Anyway good luck and I wish you the best! You're worth whatever temporary sarcifice you need to make to be healthy. :)
  • bookmaggot
    bookmaggot Posts: 7 Member
    I think you and I have a similar issue. I have a serious sweet tooth as well (in addition to a peanut butter tooth). I love candy, especially chocolate. I've found that really committing to counting every calorie is the only way I can control my eating.

    What's worked for me is only buying those problem foods in single-serving packages. A bag of fun-size, individually-wrapped chocolate bars for instance or single-serving packets of peanut butter. If I have a jar of peanut butter in the house, I'll just nickel and dime it away without realizing just how much of it I've eaten. Same with a bag of jelly beans or something.

    Having single-serving portions that I can just scan into MFP lets me account for the calories and see how those foods can fit into a healthy diet. I get my goals met; I don't feel guilty for eating something I love, and I don't have to deprive myself.

    You can do it!
  • StrongCurves
    StrongCurves Posts: 31
    I'm very similar to you in that sweets will forever be my downfall, but I've come up with a solution that has worked for me so far and may work for you! Now my relationship with sweet foods is slightly extreme, for 10 years I've had a awful problem with binge eating, and I mean awful, like consuming over 5000 calories in one sitting then hating myself yet continuing to do this on the reg.

    What I found is that if you can sustain from eating sweets and cakes (all things naughty basically) for 2 weeks your sugar cravings decrease significantly and from then on you kind of forget how good chocolate tastes. It's like coming off some sort of drug. There was a point where I went shopping for some bio peanut butter which of course was located in between all the nutella and chocolate spread and I almost cried I craved them so much, it was then I realised how unhealthy my relationship with sweets was, if it can cause me to feel that way it must be bad! I view my relationship with sweets as an addiction (because it kind of is) so when I decided to go cold turkey, whenever I was tempted to have a cheeky chocolate I thought, "if you were addicted to cocaine, would you have a cheeky line?" No, of course you wouldnt. However, if your relationship with sweets isn't as out of control as mine, then treat yourself to a few squares of dark chocolate to get your fix. Jillian Michaels always says allow yourself 200 calories a day of something you love, be it chocolate or icecream or whatever. When you feel like you're missing out on something you only crave it more.

    I know my method sounds a little odd but it's really helped me and I'm in a place now where I don't miss chocolate and certainly don't feel like crying over nutella haha! Also another thing I found helpful is educating myself about food. Maybe watch some of the great documentaries on Netflix like Vegucated. When you find out how our food is made and how bad for us some of it really is it's a real eye opener! Hope this helps. Good luck and stay strong!
  • conquertheself
    conquertheself Posts: 91 Member
    I'm very similar to you in that sweets will forever be my downfall, but I've come up with a solution that has worked for me so far and may work for you! Now my relationship with sweet foods is slightly extreme, for 10 years I've had a awful problem with binge eating, and I mean awful, like consuming over 5000 calories in one sitting then hating myself yet continuing to do this on the reg.

    What I found is that if you can sustain from eating sweets and cakes (all things naughty basically) for 2 weeks your sugar cravings decrease significantly and from then on you kind of forget how good chocolate tastes. It's like coming off some sort of drug. There was a point where I went shopping for some bio peanut butter which of course was located in between all the nutella and chocolate spread and I almost cried I craved them so much, it was then I realised how unhealthy my relationship with sweets was, if it can cause me to feel that way it must be bad! I view my relationship with sweets as an addiction (because it kind of is) so when I decided to go cold turkey, whenever I was tempted to have a cheeky chocolate I thought, "if you were addicted to cocaine, would you have a cheeky line?" No, of course you wouldnt. However, if your relationship with sweets isn't as out of control as mine, then treat yourself to a few squares of dark chocolate to get your fix. Jillian Michaels always says allow yourself 200 calories a day of something you love, be it chocolate or icecream or whatever. When you feel like you're missing out on something you only crave it more.

    I know my method sounds a little odd but it's really helped me and I'm in a place now where I don't miss chocolate and certainly don't feel like crying over nutella haha! Also another thing I found helpful is educating myself about food. Maybe watch some of the great documentaries on Netflix like Vegucated. When you find out how our food is made and how bad for us some of it really is it's a real eye opener! Hope this helps. Good luck and stay strong!

    Thank you this helped. Although, my relationship with food is very messed up. I gave up nutella and a lot of the times I can go without chocolate or even nutbutters. In fact I have also heard that going without sugar for 2 weeks can decrease your cravings but sadly it did not work for me. It just didn't. I eat healthy clean meals but in between I often snack and I often crave sweet food. I eat tons of fruits and veggies but still nothing seems to satisfy me. I do go to food for comfort which is a horrible thing to do. Also, I need to learn to eat smaller portions ... I love the tip Jillian Micheal says about eating 200 calorie of your favorite food; Ill try that and see how it goes. It sounds fair and satisfying :D
  • conquertheself
    conquertheself Posts: 91 Member
    Thank you all for the replys. It is very useful and great to hear all your thoughts and experiences. MUCH APPRECIATED!!
  • StrongCurves
    StrongCurves Posts: 31
    Funnily enough since I posted this comment I've fallen off the wagon in a tremendous way. My god it's just so difficult some times I often wonder If I'll be this way forever. If you find anything that works for you do let me know! If you ever want someone to talk to I'm here! I sometimes think that because I am unable to talk about my obsessive relationship with food with my friends (all skinny, too embarrassed) it never really gets a chance to get resolved because it's all in my head and I suppose if I fail and binge who is to know apart from me. It's honestly so disheartening. Hope you're in a better place yourself!
  • conquertheself
    conquertheself Posts: 91 Member
    I eat chocolate every day. Every single day. Count your calories, make sure you get a great balance of nutrition otherwise, and fit it into your day. Be active. Appropriate portion sizes. Stop trying to be too restrictive as it obviously causes you to binge (which is a very common thing and nothing to be ashamed of).

    Get a decent sports bra or do exercise (such as swimming) where you don't have to jump up and down.

    This is interesting. So I can eat chocolate but as long as I reach my calorie intake for the day, I am able to still loose weight?
  • kdillson70
    kdillson70 Posts: 63
    I love my sweets and wine, but I can usually fit it in my calories for the day. However, the more you eat sweets, the more you crave them. I had two chip ahoy brownie filled cookies yesterday. It satisfied my craving, but I didn't eat the whole bag. Most of the time I eat high protein foods that keep me full. Almonds, yogurt, fish, chicken, eggs. Try eating (snacking) at least 6x's a day to constantly feel full, it will help your cravings.
  • Luciu5
    Luciu5 Posts: 15
    This is interesting. So I can eat chocolate but as long as I reach my calorie intake for the day, I am able to still loose weight?
    YES! You can eat ANYTHING you want and lose weight as long as you stay under your calorie goal. I always make sure I have enough calories left by the end of the day to have some kind of snack, whether that be chocolate, popcorn, or ice cream.

    Log all your food accurately, no matter what it is. Log before you eat. If you don't have enough calories, don't eat it. Do this and you will lose weight.
  • conquertheself
    conquertheself Posts: 91 Member
    This is interesting. So I can eat chocolate but as long as I reach my calorie intake for the day, I am able to still loose weight?
    YES! You can eat ANYTHING you want and lose weight as long as you stay under your calorie goal. I always make sure I have enough calories left by the end of the day to have some kind of snack, whether that be chocolate, popcorn, or ice cream.

    Log all your food accurately, no matter what it is. Log before you eat. If you don't have enough calories, don't eat it. Do this and you will lose weight.

    Wow, I never thought it actually works as sometimes I do not get accurate measures but I will try this for a month and see how it goes. It makes sense and seems good since I wont have to deprive myself rather Ill have to learn how to eat in moderation. Thank you!!! :)

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