I'm failing and old nasty habits are starting to reappear

this is me, im at the same place.
need to get on track and easter here and of course i got into the candy and went over . now i want to kick my self.

You have to really want it. You have to decide that it is worth the sacrifice to reach your goals. Wake up and recommit! Remind yourself why you want to lose weight. As for me, I always feel better when I am eating healthy and moving more. But I struggle with the "all or nothing" mentality, too, when I mess up eating. I'm getting way better at it, though.

30 pounds is a lot to lose!! Don't let yourself gain it back!! Just take some time tonight before you drift off to sleep to lay there and visualize yourself at your goal weight. Picture the outfit, the place, the people who will see the "new" you. Hold on to that happy image and call it up in your mind when you feel like giving up. Would you rather work hard to re-lose the 30 you've already lost? Or do the same work but be at 60 lbs lost?? I hope you just see the value in what you have done so far and recommit. Don't let it be for nothing.

I'm not sure if anyone already mentioned this...but in regards to having the junk food in the house for your husband and kids....

If it's not good for you, it's not good for them. You don't want your kids to have to struggle with their weight. You're not depriving your kids by not having a house full of sweets and treats. Save the treats for special occasions--and have healthy alternatives in the house for them. THey might complain at first, but they will get over it. I just recently came to this realization--and truth be told, I was the one eating the junk, not them. If you MUST keep something in the house for them, make it something that you do not like. (like my kids like sour candy--I do not--so if I'm going to get them a treat, it'll be sour candy).

I also think you need to remind yourself how much 30 pounds is! THink of 30 pounds of ground beef! That's quite an accomplishment. When you are tempted to eat something that you know is off limits for you--think about that 30 pounds of ground beef, and how much better you feel with it off your body!

Also, in regards to the first issue, where you can't have just one bite without going on a binge---if you allow yourself that taste and you're heading to eat more of it---try brushing your teeth (or chewing mint gum). It will get the taste of the food out of your mouth. It also helps to drink a glass of water to clear your pallette.

As for the lack of energy to exercise, I suggest you start small. Just tell yourself that you're going to go for a 10 minute walk. It's not an option---just ten minutes---anyone can squeeze 10 minutes into their day. I bet once you are out there, enjoying yourself, tha 10 minutes will turn into 20 or 30 minutes. Half the battle is starting.

Sometimes it's just a matter of creating new habits to kick a plateau in the bum.

I cannot have snacks in my house or I eat them. Some, worse than others. So, I stopped buying junk food. Period. My husband stopped snacking because the snacks weren't there. I did the same. If the chips, doughnuts, etc aren't in the house, people will either eat something healthy or not eat, and after a few days, you just kind of go for the apples instead.

As far as the one bite=binge, log your "bite" calories and then move on. Maybe have a little less rice at dinner or walk an extra mile to compensate.

You said that. You worked out. That is great. If you stopped. You think you are a failure. You're not because you did work out and even if you stopped for a while I bet it was more then you have done in a while. Love yourself. Stop being so hard on yourself. There are enough. People in this world to bring you down. Be in your corner.

I agree about the sweets and treats being in the house - they're not treats if they are always available and you're not doing your children any favours by having them. No need to make out that all these things are banned - just say you didn't buy any this week - if your husband wants them he can buy as he goes - you can buy a treat out with the children if appropriate - it's harder to overeat in public. Keep healthy alternatives in the house and plan them in.

You may find it helpful to pre log your food early every day so you know what you've got to play with. Stick to the plan.

You've done great so far - don't let it go :flowerforyou:

In relation to the sweets and treats for your husband and kids here's how me and my fiancee make it work.
He likes his sweets, in fact there is a draw in the fridge full of chocolate bars. He has will power and can only eat 1 and leave the others. This is will power I do not have and we both know it.
So the only chocolates allowed in the fridge (or treats in the house) are a) chocolates I can't eat because I have a gluten intolerance or b) chocolates I don't like.

That being said I think the points others have made about cutting down the amounts of treats in the house may be valid.

I share a lot of these same "traps." I've just never been this honest with myself all at once :-). Over the years, I learned that taking one challenge at a time works best for me and just keep tracking so I can quantify the impact of the single change. Here's how I deal with these challenges:

1.) One Cheat = Day of Crap: I make myself a bet every time a random crap item crosses my path... if I just make it until "xx:xx" o'clock, I will have that *thing*. Chances are, xx:xx o'clock will come and go and I'll forget that was even a thing I was going to have.

2.) Sugar/Sweet/Trashy Carby Goodness: My favorite breakfast is a fatty bagel sandwich with a rich coffee drink (proper 930 calories). Sometimes when I wake up, that's the ONLY THING I CAN THINK ABOUT. It will literally consume all intelligent, self-respecting thought to the point where I find it difficult to concieve FUNCTIONING AS A NORMAL ADULT UNTIL SOMEONE GIVES ME MY DAMN BAGEL. Words cannot describe how much control this craving has over me. These are the days I brew boring coffee and make a super lush smoothie to drink with it like frozen banana, avocado, peach, and vanilla protein powder to "trick" myself into thinking that I'm actually indulging in that coffee drink I crave ever so much. Emotionally manipulative as it sounds, sometimes "tricking" your stomach/mind into thinking you fell into the "trap" is the only defense you have against whatever craving is getting in the way of success.

3.) No time for personal meal prep: Find staple solutions for those days you don't feel like elaborately planning your intake. I have Amazon Prime subscriptions set up for Raw Meal vanilla Protein Powder and organic jerky to be delivered to the house on regular intervals. I go to Costco once a month to stock up on pistachios, healthy frozen/convenience meals, and sparkling water (to satiate soda/beer cravings). I also have a local organic grocer delivering a box of random local fresh produce so I know I'm challenging myself to eat new and exciting fruit and veg every day. The soup I made out of my last delivery has saved me from consuming over 1100 calories the last 2 days alone because I didn't just run to Wendy's and get a chili cheese baked potato and ALL OF THE chicken nuggets every time I was hungry.

Yes, I actually do carry a magical backpack full of non-perishible healthier-than-crap things everywhere I go because I SUCK at meal planning.


4.) Skipping Workouts/tired: This took a lot of work for me, especially when I switched to a night shift job. I find that intentionally carving out dedicated time to work out BEFORE life takes over is the only way I can guarantee sweaty time. This means sacrificing an hour of sleep just to wake up, workout, and shower up BEFORE I have the chance to pull the "I'm worn out" card. The only reason I'm even mildly sticking to this is because my husband makes sure that I can have that dedicated time by tending to the pets, picking up a few extra chores, etc. Putting you first will only amplify the "You" you'll be through the rest of the day.


5.) Friends: Truth is, no one will ever want you to succeed more than YOU. Our husbands know they married some hot action, why wouldn't they lavish us with delicious things when our desires get the best of us. I'm still trying to figure out the whole "how can Man support me when he fears for his life during PMS season and I am pleading for a burger?" We are piloting a new idea... I made a list of all of the things I have asked husband for over the last few months. Tacos, burgers, pie, beer, whatever... and made a supplemental list of acceptable substitutions for when I ask for these things. That way, he is still the hunter/gatherer, I'm still getting what I'm really craving, and my entire day isn't derailed by a completely stupid craving. Examples:

Double Cheeseburger (750 calories) - Single Hamburger as a lettuce wrap (360 calories)
Tacos and Queso from Torchy's (900+ calories) - Taco Bell Fresco Style Bean Soft Taco (130ish calories) and a Nacho (300ish calories)
Beer (150-200/serving) - Sparkling Grapefruit infused water (0 calories)
Pie (300ish/serving) - PIE (BECAUSE, PIIIIIIIE)

I'm hoping to use my food substitutions list more to combat the whole #1 and #2 trap... but hey, life is a work in progress, right?

You got this. Even through this period of demotivating impulses, you are staying TRUE to YOU and not giving up. Just keep swimming girl!

I can easily fall into these traps too. But I find if I keep myself accountable, log as I go, so I know how many cals I have (use the phone app all the time) I won't over do it. I def can get lazy with exercise myself, but I log every move I make and realize I move more than I think. But I find it helpful to help other stay accountable, and have them keep my accountable. As for having sweets in the house, I have them too, but I always have a plan in my head what I'm going to eat for the day and a treat is always a decision made at the end of the day after logging EVERYTHING to see if it's worth it or not. You obviously have done well because you've lost as much weight as I have, so it's not ALL FOR NOT!!! Be proud of where you've gotten and keep moving FORWARD.

Feel free to add as I'm also looking to gain more support so that I can support back, it's what works!!

All my diets in the past failed for the same reason. I wasn't getting the needed support from my family. All my life my dad has been the biggest critic of my weight, but once I started dieting, he would be the one getting me junk food. My mom attempted to help me, but she kept buying treats and such because my dad wanted it.

After months of giving up, I was finally encouraged by friends to come back on here and really start trying. I have just started week three and am doing great so far! My dad is highly annoyed at my calorie counting, but I've learned how to shut the negativity out.

I still crave treats of course, and because of my dad they are all still in the house.
That is why I have a cheat day. Sunday through Friday I will exercise and keep track of all my food on here, but once Saturday comes around I don't count a thing or do any intentional exercise. On Saturday, I still don't go super crazy because I make myself sick, but if I feel like a handful of Doritos, I'm going to eat the handful of Doritos. As soon as I wake up on Sunday, I get myself back on track and 9 times out of 10 I'm not craving junk because I let loose a little the day before.

I wish you the best of luck for your weight loss journey, and don't let lack of support bring you down!

If you truly have a goal to lose weight, recommit to it and stop the "poor me" crap. I'm an expert at the "poor me" syndrome as many here are. I failed yesterday because of it. I recognized it for what it was and today, I'm moving on. Understand that I absolutely wish the best for you. If you want to wait till your 64 like I am, well, that's a decision only you can make and on your profile you wrote that the answers are within you-believe it. I suspect that you already have all the nutritional knowledge you need.

First of all, know this, it is hard and many of us relate to everything you are saying.

This is a quote I have had posted on my computer for almost 2 years now from someone on this site. I read it every single day, sometimes multiple times daily.

"If I don't yet have the self control, I don't want it bad enough".

It keeps me motivated to do what I can to keep in control of my situation. As Tom says in the posting above, and this goes for my situation as well, I am 62. Don't procrastinate for decades as I did.

YOU CAN DO THIS! You just have to want it bad enough and be totally committed to succeeding. Instead of reaching for food, go for a walk, pick up a book, sweep the floor, or run up and down the stairs. Do anything but grab the food. Best of luck to you!

Is it possible for you to buy an elliptical/treadmill/your choice other for home use? It might make you more motivated to work out.

Also, perhaps stop buying cookies, etc. Or buy small portions that are labelled just for your kids/husband. If you think of it as "theirs" and if you eat it they won't have any, it might keep you from eating it. Or like I said just stop buying them. Cookies shouldn't be in the house 24/7 anyway (imho) they're a special thing.

1) I don't have much help for this one other than STOP IT. Seriously, if one foot slipped over a cliff would just let your whole body fall. Stop using one tiny mistake as an excuse to pig out. Either you want to lose the weight or you don't. Decide.

2) Sweets are not a requirement for husbands or children, but if you have them in the house maybe make them less accessible. Put them in a back cupboard or on bottom shelf. Keep some lower calories sweets or sweet with protein or fiber (high fiber bars, protein bars, cocoa roast almonds, honey roast peanuts, etc.) on hand for yourself.

3) Do meal prep or cooking ahead of time. Have pre-sliced veggie on hand for a quick stir fry. Keep a big bowl of prechopped salad ingredients in the fridge. Get a crockpot and use it.

4) You can exercise while watching TV. Get a step, resistance bands, dumbbells, or something else small and use them while you watch the news. Set a reminder to get up every 30 min and do 25 jumping jacks (or whatever).

5) Stop begging for milkshakes

6) Set short term goals for yourself. This week I will not have a milkshake. Today I will walk 10,000 steps. I will not have a treat if I don't exercise. Make them meaningful but short term enough to meet often. Meeting goals is a great way to get motivated for the next goal, and meeting goals is something to be proud of. Tell your family your goals, so they can pat you on the back when you meet them.

No matter what you eat, log it. If you've eaten an entire box of Oreo cookies, log it. Start holding yourself really accountable for every calorie that passes your lips. It's easy to just not log the bad days but that doesn't help you. Log everything, good or bad.

Tell your husband to NOT buy you any more junk. I would strangle mine if he did that. I can't refuse junk food if it's in my house.

I am lucky that I do not have kids and I just share my house with my fiance. I bake him treats for work but I have to have him hide them. No joke. If I know where the date squares or granola bars are, I will eat two of them and blow my daily calories right out of the water. It's embarrassing to have such little will power but I have to admit to myself that this is what I need to do to make sure I do not sabotage myself. I bake for my fiance on a full stomach so that I can put the baked goods away after and when he gets home he puts them in his hiding spot. Sounds silly, I know, but I would not have the willpower to know where they are and not eat them. I learned that lesson last week when nearly every day had a fricking date square or three in my logs >< I appreciate the sacrifices my fiance is making to help me along my journey so I want to make sure I am still able to make things for him to show that appreciation and to make sure he doesn't go back to buying boxed junk food.

Good luck and DO NOT beat yourself up about "failing". This is not a race, this is a journey and you will succeed and fail along the way. You just have to pick yourself back up, brush yourself back off and keep going. It is HARD WORK to diet in a house full of tempting food. VERY hard. I really feel for you. I would take this opportunity to get the kids and husband off sugar as well. Or if you need to, get a lock and lock up the food so you are not tempted by it. Have them hide it in their rooms. Seriously. Just figure out something that works.

You can do this. Have faith in yourself!