Can Spinn Make you Fat?

She’s Got Legs

I have some alarming news. Riding a bike, especially if you do it with any frequency, will give you muscular legs. And that’s not all. Should you be unfortunate enough to be a sprinter or hill climber, it may also give your booty a bit of a boost. You should really stop now. Let your legs atrophy a little. Maybe find an alternative form of exercise that can minimize the size of your thighs. I’m sorry I’ve kept this from you for so long. Turns out Harper’s Bazaar scooped me on this public service message late last summer when they broke the story: Is Spinning Making You Fat?

Scars and bulging quads? These legs carry me through this wonderful life.

I know. I know. They weren’t talking about actually riding a bike outside. Why on Earth would anyone do that? Helmets mess up your hair and there are bugs out there. But they were sounding the alarm for any and all cycling “Spinsters” (yeah, for real…”Spinsters”. Because nobody is going to marry a lady with large quads, I mean really, duh…). Yes, cycling burns calories and lots of them. Yes, you may really enjoy it. But is it giving you the body you desire? Or much more importantly, the body you think that you should desire to be desirable? That is the scary question.

Unless you’re an apple-shaped woman with skinny legs, you might be in danger of developing muscles down there where the knobby sticks should be. That’s not just me talking. In the Bizarre, I mean Bazaar, article, celebrity trainer David Kirsch notes that though he is not “anti-Spinning” he lets said apple shaped women with skinny legs go once a week, but forbids fashion models to ride at all.

Sigh.

I’m not even going to go into the fact that Kirsch and company would likely never fret over their male clientele’s popping quads. That’s shooting fish in a barrel here. What bothers me most about this stream of nonsense is 1) The notion that muscle is being made synonymous with fat and 2) that we should choose our exercise based on how it makes us look rather than how it makes us feel. Forget the joy. Ditch the endorphins. For the love of all that is holy, don’t get strong. If riding a bike gives you muscular legs, take up rowing. if that gives you muscular arms, take up tennis. Hmm, that might give you muscular arms and legs. You know, it’s better to have a seat, stop eating, and just be skinny fat as the models, or more specifically the models’ trainers, might say.

I have a better idea. Ladies (gents, you too), go for a ride, maybe two, or 200. Then go get yourself a nice pair of Lucky jeans (a favorite among the lovely ladies I ride with), a white T and a pair of boots. Then go out into the world with those freshly dressed strong legs and kick some *kitten*. After all, that is what those legs of yours are actually made to do.