what would you do to the above person?

Lick him

definitely leave the lights on, while we exchanged witty erudite banter.

Take For Meal

Bring the cofee :-)

Shut off his computer and drag him rock climbing with me.

Lol, much rather be doing that, think I need a better profile pic

Give a twinkie.

Take his phone away so I could see his face

ask him to show me his guns