Spouse, SO's, others.... are they on your list?

24

Replies

  • So_Much_Fab
    So_Much_Fab Posts: 1,146 Member
    My BF isn't here b/c logging, etc. isn't something he's interested in, but he knows I'm here and I would have no issues adding him to my FL if he decided to join.

    That said, I wouldn't want any real life friends on my FL because I'm more open and candid here than I often am in real life and especially more than I am on FB and I like having that freedom.
  • MeowSkull
    MeowSkull Posts: 101 Member
    Wow, thank you all for the feedback. Much appreciated.

    Regarding logging for him, I would eventually give it over to him once the db is seeded, but he'd get really frustrated with the learning process in the beginning. Also, I do all the cooking so I'd have to input dinner if it's a recipe I use.
  • MeowSkull
    MeowSkull Posts: 101 Member
    My BF isn't here b/c logging, etc. isn't something he's interested in, but he knows I'm here and I would have no issues adding him to my FL if he decided to join.

    That said, I wouldn't want any real life friends on my FL because I'm more open and candid here than I often am in real life and especially more than I am on FB and I like having that freedom.

    All my RL friends on my list are far away from me... a few in the same state but none I see more than twice a year. However, we also have a small FB group where we post all the chitchat and TMI crap that goes along with getting healthy :)
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
    Mine is not on MFP at all. He doesn't have to try very hard to lose weight.
  • Andreaviolet89
    Andreaviolet89 Posts: 290 Member
    I have a few real life friends on here but for the most part this is my space for my own goals and if I had a SO I wouldn't add them.
  • bd0027
    bd0027 Posts: 1,053 Member
    I'm single but I do have a crush on someone who is on my friends list. If I could trick him into being my boyfriend, he's cute enough that I'd let him stay. :blushing:
  • Toblave
    Toblave Posts: 244 Member
    Why would you not want your SO on your list? Unless you're doing something that you shouldn't be doing anyway and have something to hide then I can't see any reason not to.

    No, nothing like that. MFP is just kind of a place for "ME" on my journey to healthy. I'm trying to figure out why I wouldn't want him here, but it's more like MFP is my "alone time" with it all. Not sure that makes sense.

    I don't know that's just me, I don't feel the need for that kind of space. Then again, I only have 3 people on my FL and my wife isn't on MFP yet.
  • spsanderson
    spsanderson Posts: 39 Member
    I would think you would want your husband/so on your friend list, getting healthy in a relationship is not all about me, it's about us, I would think you'd want your husband/so to be encouraging?

    I could be wrong. I keep asking my wife to friend me, I could use the snide looks when I eat crap.
  • _MG_
    _MG_ Posts: 453 Member
    The wife's not on here.
  • mediamogulsteve
    mediamogulsteve Posts: 115 Member
    My g/f was my ONLY friend on MFP for a long time. Then after a few weeks of reading forums, I decided to add more friends. A few local, a few long distance. Some male, some female. I like the positive outlook and support that my current friend's list provides. It's also easier for my g/f and I to share meals so that we don't both have to build recipes or "my foods".

    It's a tough line to draw. If you don't add him could it be b/c you're hiding something? If you do add him will he be in your business all the time? What are your motives for NOT adding him? What are his motives for being added?
  • shemama1
    shemama1 Posts: 30 Member
    If I had to have my "space" from my husband, I would not be married to him. Part of why I married him is to share everything with him. No secrets. If I had something to hide, I'd probably be abstaining from any social media, and be in marriage counseling instead.
  • michellekicks
    michellekicks Posts: 3,624 Member
    Yep. MrBigMack is on here and keeps tabs on me :laugh:
  • Pirate_chick
    Pirate_chick Posts: 1,216 Member
    My parents are my friends, but they don't log so they don't count. I have had two friends join, but they don't log either. outside of them I would prefer to keep MFP just for me.
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    Yep! My husband is on my MFP friends list and it was not an issue for me at all. In fact, he didn't join until I'd been on here about 9 months and prior to that I occasionally shared forum posts and things like that with him anyway :-)
  • vjohn04
    vjohn04 Posts: 2,276 Member
    If my husband wanted me to log his food, I'd tell him to go take a hike.

    I'm not his mommy. If he wants a reference point, then he can do it. Else wise, he really doesn't want a 'reference point' or whatever that means.

    My husband is on my FL and hasn't logged in 7 months.
  • My wife isn't on MFP and I've given up suggesting that she join. If she was here I'd friend her, sure. But I'm not friends with my kids or nieces and nephews on fb. That would be creepy, IMHO.
  • laurie04427
    laurie04427 Posts: 421 Member
    Yep hubby is on my list. The people in MFP found out my real weight long before he did though lol.
  • Sassymama66_75HARD
    Sassymama66_75HARD Posts: 91 Member
    My husband and my adult son are both on my list. My son checks in and logs daily - my husband logs once a year - :) Do what you are comfortable with.
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
    no spouse and my so is not on here, but if he was, he could be my friend, because I have nothing to hide.
  • _JPunky
    _JPunky Posts: 508 Member
    I have the SO on here, but I met him on here...so it might be considered rude to delete him now. :laugh:

    I have my sister on here, but she hasn't logged in in over 2 months, so that really doesn't count.

    Other than that, the only people on here that I know in real life are people that I met on here. I like to keep this very, very separate.
  • Linnaea27
    Linnaea27 Posts: 639 Member
    If my fiance needed to use MFP, then sure, of course he'd be on my friends list. My dad is on my friends list, actually, but he doesn't seem to be very committed to this at the moment. I don't flirt with people on here, just as I don't generally flirt with people IRL since I am very happy with my fiance! I've also learned from past internet forums I've been on to not expose too much of who I am, so there is nothing here that's embarrassing, so nothing I wouldn't want my dad or fiance or other people close to me to see if they went looking.

    If my partner was using MFP, no way in hell would I log his food. :noway: If someone really wants to make use of this site, they should use it like 99% of the rest of us do and be responsible for themselves.
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
    One time my husband got on my computer after I was on MFP and wanted to know who's picture I was using as my profile picture. It was a close up of a stomach. MY STOMACH. Jerk.
  • JoelleAnn78
    JoelleAnn78 Posts: 1,492 Member
    Edited to add: Also, I'd be doing the logging for him, he just really wants it as reference. He won't stick with it if he's have to log it himself. I'm not sure how involved he'd get here but you never really know!

    Are you also going to spoon feed him? Work out for him?

    Agreed -- he's an adult. Don't log for him. What is the benefit to him if you do? If he wants to get healthy show him and let him do it. My husband is on my FL and he doesn't log. Whatever -- he's a grown man. I'll do me and he can do him.
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  • verptwerp
    verptwerp Posts: 3,628 Member
    bumping for a read after work .....
  • siratlas
    siratlas Posts: 239 Member
    No, my partner isn't on here. If she had a MFP account, I would certainly friend her. She has been one of my biggest sources of support, for many reasons over the years. We have different goals - she's trying to maintain or gain weight so we balance out well. Her reason for not being here has nothing to do with me, however or trying to keep spaces separate. She has a hard time meeting people and having her personal info "out there" online for people who don't know her. It just didn't seem like the best idea for us to "couple up" on MFP.
  • jackpotclown
    jackpotclown Posts: 3,275 Member
    She was when I first started, but after not showing up or expressing any interest in this, deleted her \m/
  • Sassymama66_75HARD
    Sassymama66_75HARD Posts: 91 Member
    I haveall my wives on my fl

    sister-wives.jpg


    LOL! I almost spit out my iced coffee all over my laptop!
  • HollyB1223
    HollyB1223 Posts: 41 Member
    At this stage in my life, I mostly leave my husband out of my weight struggles. It is an ongoing thing, so I need others to support me in this "sector" of my journey.

    My husband wants to SOLVE the problem and really has no reference for relating to my weight loss issues since he has always been very slender. He eats exactly whatever he feels like eating, as well. Always has, except for my efforts to arrange our home menus around healthful foods! :)

    I personally much prefer the really anonymous nature of MFP for that reason. We can find, and help provide a cheering section, for others going through the same struggles, without causing anyone any real stress over our difficulties. :) I think a win-win solution!
  • Sovi_
    Sovi_ Posts: 575 Member
    My husband is banned from this site. I told him the MFP has ran out of Usernames and cannot accommodate him at this time. THIS MY THING, he better get his own!