The Struggle... Advice is welcome, please and thanks..

dramallamaduck
dramallamaduck Posts: 97 Member
in Food and Nutrition
The struggle... Everyone has their own fitness journey. What works for you may not work for me and what I do may not work for you. For example, I have a very dear friend. She is vegan. She eats mostly raw. This has worked for her and she has lost approximately 70 pound in the last year eating lots of raw greens, fruit, etc...

She is trying to educate the world on the evils of meat now. And how we are consuming fat and the fat will make us fat. I agree that eating more fruits and veggies will probably make me healthier, but I'm not convinced that the egg and ham taco I made for breakfast is going to make me fat (as long as it fits within my cals and macros).

I like to listen to what she has to say, but in my mind, I don't think what she's doing is healthy. She went on a 7 day lemon water fast. She does all of the juice fasting. I love her and it's her choice. I'm not trying to convince her otherwise. I just wish she would stop trying to guilt me when I'm having my chicken!!

I have started eating plant strong, but I'm still eating dairy and I'm still eating meat.

I'm really not sure the point of this post I just really need to hear others opinions. Am I nuts?

Replies

  • StaciMarie1974
    StaciMarie1974 Posts: 4,138 Member
    To each his own...

    Have you tried telling her that you respect the choices she has made for herself, and you would appreciate if she would respect you & your choices? Tell her that you have the info she's provided, that you're an adult and are happy with your non-vegan lifestyle. And that you don't want her to say another word about what you eat. Then if she continues, walk away if she starts in.
  • cwsreddy
    cwsreddy Posts: 998 Member
    Yeah she shouldn't be trying to guilt trip you. You do you and she'll do her, and at the end of the day if we all end up happy who cares how we did it?

    You don't have to cut fat to lose fat. You don't have to go vegan to be healthy. There's a middle ground. It all depends on what you want to do and what you find sustainable for yourself.

    Losing weight is pure cal in/cal out (though there are different methods for making this achievable). Body composition has to do with your macros and micros, and that's where the types of food become incredibly important.

    But no - you're not nuts :wink:
  • AusAshMommy
    AusAshMommy Posts: 845 Member
    I had a friend who tried doing the same thing - I just kept changing the subject until she "got it" - you aren't nuts, you are an adult perfectly capable of making your own decisions, she needs to respect that.
  • edisonsbulb
    edisonsbulb Posts: 93 Member
    Start drinking your chicken, smoothie-style, see if she's cool with that. :wink:
  • mxmkenney
    mxmkenney Posts: 486 Member
    Prove her wrong, or at least prove that her way is not the only way to lose weight. Sure, eating healthier choices and plant-based foods is a good idea and will help you on your weight-loss journey, but you CAN eat whatever you want and still lose weight - as long as you stay at a calorie deficit.

    Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. Your friend has hers, you have yours. Neither are wrong. She should not be making you feel guilty for eating meat and dairy. No food group is "evil" in my book. :devil:
  • dramallamaduck
    dramallamaduck Posts: 97 Member
    Start drinking your chicken, smoothie-style, see if she's cool with that. :wink:

    I just giggled and gagged at the same time...
  • MzHornedOne
    MzHornedOne Posts: 71 Member
    It's wrong of your friend to pressure or make you feel bad because you choose to eat meat. Part of the problem could be that she is just so passionate about it because it changed her life that she wants others to share the passion she has. She may not be intentionally being rude but it definitely is rude.
  • Derpes
    Derpes Posts: 2,033 Member
    You are on the right track...eat meat! Eat at a deficit.....

    She did a cleanse eh.....those are the very definition of charlatanism and are often dangerous.
  • So_Much_Fab
    So_Much_Fab Posts: 1,146 Member
    Nothing is worse than a know it all. I would just tell her thanks for the suggestions, but what you're doing is working fine for you.

    Then...throat punch her. LOL! :laugh:
  • cwsreddy
    cwsreddy Posts: 998 Member
    You are on the right track...eat meat! Eat at a deficit.....

    She did a cleanse eh.....those are the very definition of charlatanism and are often dangerous.

    I've heard it's much better to be involved in fear mongering.
  • Derpes
    Derpes Posts: 2,033 Member
    You are on the right track...eat meat! Eat at a deficit.....

    She did a cleanse eh.....those are the very definition of charlatanism and are often dangerous.

    I've heard it's much better to be involved in fear mongering.

    Tell me more.
  • heronh
    heronh Posts: 529 Member
    Did you ever tell you why is meat bad? Is it an ethical thing? Because I love telling vegans/vegetarians who feel the need to lecture me that their vegetables are harvested using combines and tractors that kills lots of small burrowing animals. Or that without animal manure and bone and blood meal that their precious vegetables won't be able to grow.
    Then I tell them that I buy my produce locally and I buy pastured raised meat where the farmers know each of their animals and I buy seafood that is approved by marine stewardship for sustainability and eggs that are either pastures raised or humane certified.
    If its health, ask her to give you reason and where she got that idea. Does it have its merits? How are the studies performed and who paid for the reasearch.
    Or you can just tell her your feelings how she made you feel when she is lecturing you. That this is your life, your choice and remind her to just be your friend and be there for you.
  • dramallamaduck
    dramallamaduck Posts: 97 Member
    You are on the right track...eat meat! Eat at a deficit.....

    She did a cleanse eh.....those are the very definition of charlatanism and are often dangerous.

    I've heard it's much better to be involved in fear mongering.

    Bacon is the devil...:devil: It's going to give you a heart attack...

    Nom nom nom
    Tell me more.
  • Smith_Shardae
    Smith_Shardae Posts: 1
    You are not nuts. Just needed to vent. Have you told her that it makes you uncomfortable when she does that?
  • Derpes
    Derpes Posts: 2,033 Member
    You are on the right track...eat meat! Eat at a deficit.....

    She did a cleanse eh.....those are the very definition of charlatanism and are often dangerous.

    I've heard it's much better to be involved in fear mongering.


    Fear mongering....or that inconvenient little thing called logic as some like to call it....imagine that!!

    The Harvard Medical School is not that credible of a source....they are not renowned for much....pretty obscure....having said that, here are a few factoids about cleansing that probably are not true since cleansing is soooo great.

    A summary of detox diets:

    Purpose. To restore energy, lose weight, and relieve symptoms of chronic conditions like arthritis and fibromyalgia.

    Evidence of effectiveness. There are no data on this particular diet in the medical literature. But many studies have shown that fasts and extremely low-calorie diets invariably lower the body’s basal metabolic rate as it struggles to conserve energy. Once the dieter resumes normal eating, rapid weight gain follows.

    Risks. The diet is lacking in protein, fatty acids, and other essential nutrients. The daily laxative regimen can cause dehydration, deplete electrolytes, and impair normal bowel function.


    Intestinal cleansing

    Numerous kits are marketed for this purpose, most of which include a high-fiber supplement, a “support” supplement containing herbs or enzymes, and a laxative tea, each to be used daily. Manufacturers of the herbal detox kits recommend continuing the regimen for several weeks.

    Purpose. The aim is to eradicate parasites and expel fecal matter that allegedly accumulates and adheres to the intestinal walls.

    Evidence of effectiveness. Several studies suggest that milk thistle, which is often included as a supportive supplement, may improve liver function with few side effects. But there’s no medical evidence for the cleansing procedure as a whole.

    Risks. Like fasting, colonic cleansing carries a risk of dehydration, electrolyte imbalance, impaired bowel function, and disruption of intestinal flora.

    Cost. A month's supply of the supplements and laxatives sold on most Web sites is $20 to $70. The manufacturers recommend continuing the procedure for two to three months.



    Source:

    http://www.health.harvard.edu/fhg/updates/The-dubious-practice-of-detox.shtml
  • dramallamaduck
    dramallamaduck Posts: 97 Member
    I haven't... I usually just nod and listen.

    My problem is that all of her information is supposedly research based. Some of her arguments are solid. I'm struggling to figure out which are actual research based and which are just fear mongering. Her primary source of information is the movie "Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead."

    I'm also notorious for taking pure information as guilt. I'm a bit sensitive and I want to make people happy, so if they give me advice I feel guilt if I don't take it (but that's an issue my therapist and I are working on).
  • cwsreddy
    cwsreddy Posts: 998 Member
    this dude just said Harvard isn't a good source? whut?
  • AllonsYtotheTardis
    AllonsYtotheTardis Posts: 16,947 Member
    I haven't... I usually just nod and listen.

    My problem is that all of her information is supposedly research based. Some of her arguments are solid. I'm struggling to figure out which are actual research based and which are just fear mongering. Her primary source of information is the movie "Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead."

    I'm also notorious for taking pure information as guilt. I'm a bit sensitive and I want to make people happy, so if they give me advice I feel guilt if I don't take it (but that's an issue my therapist and I are working on).

    Tell her that documentaries are not the same as actual scientific research, and she needs to keep her evangelizing to herself. And if that doesn't work, start telling her about Jesus every time she brings it up.
  • EvgeniZyntx
    EvgeniZyntx Posts: 24,208 Member
    this dude just said Harvard isn't a good source? whut?

    His sarcasm font flew over your head.
  • dramallamaduck
    dramallamaduck Posts: 97 Member
    this dude just said Harvard isn't a good source? whut?

    His sarcasm font flew over your head.

    I think it may have hit the wall behind him...
  • cwsreddy
    cwsreddy Posts: 998 Member
    this dude just said Harvard isn't a good source? whut?

    His sarcasm font flew over your head.

    hey you're right! it did.

    not always easy on the interwebs. :laugh:
  • jennlefebvre08
    jennlefebvre08 Posts: 6 Member
    Hey Sammie!! I know your struggle and I face it in some form or another when it comes to anyone out there that has "their way" of being healthy. It works for them and they want everyone to do it...that's great! The thing is that not everyone can do it their way or WANTS to do it their way. What we need to know: lots of ways work. I too, watched "Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead" and yah, it made me think about juicing but only in the sense that I want to get more vitamins from fruits and veggies into me, not to actually juice per se...I had an a-ha moment last week when I went online searching for yet more information on what I could do to get past my recent "plateau" and I came across this website and it just hit me. To lose weight, no matter how I do it, I have to create a caloric deficit. Bottom line...anyway, you can check it out here:

    http://www.aworkoutroutine.com/starvation-mode/

    All of his information is free, he's not trying to sell it. He also has a FB page.

    For what it's worth, I think you're doing great girl :)

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