Bad Habits after Weight Related Compliments/Remarks

lolosensan
lolosensan Posts: 251
in Health and Weight Loss
I am wondering if anybody else experiences this? I have found that, almost every time, after somebody tells me how good I'm looking, the following occurs in this exact order: 1.) I feel really good about myself and tend to look in the mirror a lot. This is followed by a ton of self affirmations reassuring that there really is a slight difference and I'm doing a great job. I suck in and look at my stomach good and hard. Then I think about everything I've been doing and what I could be doing differently and whether or not that person was just being nice and if my clothes really feel that different and if my body actually looks any different. I usually end up thinking "yeah, I am looking really good! what?!" 2.) Within a couple hours or even the next day I play the compliment over in my head. I think about the person who said it and the way they said it. It feels good. 3.) This uncontrollable urge to eat crappy food in excess comes on and I give in. I realize what I'm doing but I don't care. I just want more, more, more. I can't get enough chocolate. I think about what I'm doing and why I'm self sabotaging but I can't figure out why in the moment and in the moment all that matters is pretzel M&Ms. Why? 4.) The next day I'm back to normal, eating a salad with a bunch of protein for lunch and going wtf was I thinking yesterday? I listen to the compliment in my head again but it sounds different, less gratifying, almost meaningless at this point. Eh oh well, life goes on. Maybe just identifying this as a thing and writing it out for the public to read will help redirect whatever habit this is, wherever it's coming from. Thanks for reading. Any input welcome, even the cat gifs...

Edit for: TL;DR Whenever people tell me how good I'm looking I binge on junk food and it feels out of control! Other experiences welcome...

Replies

  • djmax041
    djmax041 Posts: 5
    I noticed I've been getting a lot of compliments lately. I don't really take them too much to the head. Ive always been a handsome bigger guy so lol its just the fact Im getting smaller (lost 46lbs in 6 weeks) Its just and added bonus. Im far away from goals so I just stick with a mental note and keep it moving. I think some people have the tunnel vision where you're focused on what you need to do and nothing really gets you off track. I know what you mean tho, you'll feel great then the next is like blah lol. Thats life!
  • lolosensan
    lolosensan Posts: 251
    I think you're right. I need to just keep my focus and not let the compliments go to the head. I just reread my post and was like damn I get in my head a lot! haha. Anyway congrats on the progress you're making! Puttin up some big numbers!!!
  • Sara2652
    Sara2652 Posts: 158 Member
    Joy is as thorny and sharp as any of the dark emotions. To love someone fiercely, to believe in something with your whole heart, to celebrate a fleeting moment in time, to fully engage in a life that doesn’t come with guarantees — these are risks that involve vulnerability and often pain. When we lose our tolerance for discomfort, we lose joy. In fact, addiction research shows us that an intensely positive experience is as likely to cause relapse as an intensely painful experience.

    – Brene Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection, p. 72-73
  • lolosensan
    lolosensan Posts: 251
    think I will go buy this book...
  • lemon629
    lemon629 Posts: 501 Member
    Is it possible you have conflicting feelings about losing weight? Like at first you're flattered by the compliment but then you feel self conscious? Excess weight can serve as emotional protection. Something is happening mentally to give you that urge to eat.
  • GretaGirl8
    GretaGirl8 Posts: 274 Member
    perhaps it is as simple as getting an affirmation you are making progress and eating "junk" food because you feel you've earned it?

    I do it too. if i get some comments about looking thin, I tend to loosen the lease (so to speak) and indulge.
  • Sara2652
    Sara2652 Posts: 158 Member
    Brenee Brown did two really interesting TED talks you can view on youtube.

    I do the same thing with but with the scale. I just wanted to say though fantastic job on recovering so quickly!
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    Is it possible you have conflicting feelings about losing weight? Like at first you're flattered by the compliment but then you feel self conscious? Excess weight can serve as emotional protection. Something is happening mentally to give you that urge to eat.

    This is along the same lines I was thinking, OP.

    Is it possible that the whole "big change" stuff freaks you out, and in some small way (subconsciously) you're trying to reverse it or avoid the drastic changes of your body/appearance?
  • lolosensan
    lolosensan Posts: 251
    Thanks for the input everyone. I think I do treat myself and I think I am afraid of what it would be like to have a different body, but I'm not sure what the scary part is. It's something I've wanted for many, many years. Maybe wanting to be thin/fit has become part of my identity... I don't really know how I would be as the girl who has it rather than the girl who wants it..

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