Anyone afraid to bulk?

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Makoce
Makoce Posts: 938 Member
I've lost over 65lbs now. Woo. Go me.
I look great in clothes but I am super skinny fat underneath.
I have a huge Buddha belly and I hate it. I'm already almost underweight bmi so I'm not sure what else to do.
Started strength training but haven't been eating over maintenance.
Noob gains have stopped.

Now I'm stuck.
After obsessing over the scale going down for over a year it's such a were concept to gain.
On top of that - My perception of still being fat makes me terrified how I'll look if I attempt to bulk and put on muscle.
Even if I got muscle wouldn't it just push my already skinnyfat belly and whatnot outwards more?
Making me look even more chunky?

I'm also afraid of not doing enough to gain muscle.
And I also am afraid eating over into a gain will reset my binge eating disorder and I'll never be able to eat at a deficit again...


I do squats. Deadlifts. And other stuff at the gym.
I stopped doing cardio to help relax the calorie deficit but i still have one.

Can anyone ease my fears or reassure me it's the right thing to do?
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Replies

  • Makoce
    Makoce Posts: 938 Member
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    Annnyone?
  • Joehenny
    Joehenny Posts: 1,222 Member
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    Bulking is what gives shape to the body. I was scared but it's realistically a lot easier to lose than gain size that takes time and if you do it right most of it will be lean body mass.
  • Joreanasaurous
    Joreanasaurous Posts: 1,384 Member
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    As a woman it is HARD to bulk. Ideally maybe 6 pounds of muscle a year.

    I work my butt off to get muscle and it's a slow process. I really wouldn't worry too much about it. It's also easily corrected if you don't want to get bigger. Don't eat as much and don't lift as heavy.
  • salgalruns
    salgalruns Posts: 83 Member
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    I work with a trainer (which is a luxury that I refuse to give up) who has helped me realize that strength is a good thing. I don't have boy muscles, but do have definition in my arms and my abs. I have to tell you, I get more compliments from the shape of my arms than I have EVER gotten with being thin.

    I eat extremely clean - lots of protein, some carbs - but those are early in the day generally. I find myself also eating differently to fuel the different types of workouts, thus the high protein. I do high reps (20-25) with not super heavy weights. Some people that you see at the gym lift amazingly heavy things and then rest for a while in between. I do the reps in more of a circuit training series and if I take a break, it's short.

    I haven't found that I've really "bulked" - more of a redefinition of muscle. As for the belly area, I don't know what to tell you. Mine isn't super flat, but I definitely have a strong core. Some of it is loose skin from the weight loss, which drives me nuts, but I'm giving it time. At age 47, the elasticity of my skin isn't what it was in my 20s and before kids.

    For belly stuff - you might be retaining water regularly as well. Check your sodium intake - that's always a big thing with me. Fruit also bloats me like no tomorrow, although it is usually out of my system in a day or so. I'm a water and herbal tea girl now, which helps.

    My two cents - hope it helps. I'm in no way an expert as many people out there are, but sharing my experience.
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
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    with an underweight BMI even if your body fat percentage is a bit higher than it should be, I highly doubt you have a huge buddha belly. - maybe work on your relationship with your body and not massively exaggerating the bits you don't like in your mind. It's much healthier to learn to love your body, including the small imperfections. NOthing wrong with striving to improve your health and look better - but imperfections never go away completely.... that's why magazine pictures are photoshopped. Even the models still have their small imperfections.

    Don't be afraid to bulk. It will firm you up all over and improve your health a lot, especially in terms of reducing your risk of osteoporosis

    ETA: if that's you in your profile pic you're utterly delusional about the buddha belly. you have a really tight, small waist and you look fantastic.
  • GymTennis
    GymTennis Posts: 133 Member
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    Hi.. If you're so afraid (no need though).. Start off with a really small surplus..Like 300 calories... You have to have the right routine too.. You'll see changes relatively fast after a long period of loss/maintaining
  • Makoce
    Makoce Posts: 938 Member
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    I guess you're right in the respect with a underweight BMI I have room to gain weight and fill out anyway.
    As far as my pic yes that's me. I look fantastic in clothes in my opinion.
    But it's underneath them that my stomach is completely bloated out and large.
    I don't know if it's water retention from sodium or what, or water.
    I have digestional problems so maybe bloating?
    But it really bothers me. So I thought putting on muscle would help.

    It's just a scary concept for people who struggled to lose weight to gain it back even for the sake of health, mentally.

    Thanks for your experiences guys!
    Any other reassurances are appreciated..
  • JesterMFP
    JesterMFP Posts: 3,596 Member
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    Start believing the quote on your profile page. :flowerforyou:

    Regarding the bulk and/or recomp... even if you do gain a bit of fat, you'll be keeping a check on it. You can stop any time you want, and you've already lost a lot of weight, so you know how to do that again if necessary.

    Definitely work a bit on our self-perception though. Apart from anything else, it'll help you to make better decisions about what to do next.
  • Makoce
    Makoce Posts: 938 Member
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    Hehehe. Caught with my pants down on that one.

    But you're right.
    If I did it once I can do it again.
    Eating over maintenance isn't going to turn me into a ravenous monster unable to ever eat at a deficit again.
    Or at least that's the hope :P
    So at any time I can always recalculate...
  • JesterMFP
    JesterMFP Posts: 3,596 Member
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    As far as my pic yes that's me. I look fantastic in clothes in my opinion.
    But it's underneath them that my stomach is completely bloated out and large.
    Now, obviously I haven't seen under your clothes, and it may well look bloated in a way, but look at your picture - it's certainly not "large" in any possible way. Unless that outfit you're wearing is really a wetsuit or something... there's just no room for it to be large. "Skinny fat" refers to having an unhealthy level of body fat (ie obesity) at a healthy (or less) weight. With all the fitspo images that are now all the rage, I think a lot of women who actually have a perfectly healthy and normal level of fat start thinking there is something wrong with them. "Skinny fat" is the new "fat" in terms of labels to bash ourselves with.

    There's nothing wrong with wanting to change your physique to look a little more athletic or whatever (I'm trying to do the same myself) but please don't forget that it's very normal and healthy for a woman to have a layer of fat on the abdomen.
  • Makoce
    Makoce Posts: 938 Member
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    The outfit is super baggy, but it doesnt look like it on the picture for some reason. It's one of those outfits that are super baggy and you wear a beandeo bra or whatever. Not that it makes a difference.

    But, I defiantly understand women need fat on their abdomen and that the models we see in the media don't naturally look like that - but mine I defiantly think is a symptom of bloat now that I look at myself in the mirror more in-depth, and not weight related. So that's something I need to control in a different realm.

    I also think I lost a lot of muscle from being in a huge deficit when I first started losing weight last year, and pumping out 2+ hours of cardio a day. ( I got super burned oout and recalculated and lost slow instead after that.. )
    So it should be easier for me to gain some back starting out.

    Going to just go for it and up my calories and see where it takes me, because yes, I may have a great physique as it is - but my optimum goal is to look athletic and muscular! Id rather be that than skinny, so wel see how this goes!
  • AllOutof_Bubblegum
    AllOutof_Bubblegum Posts: 3,646 Member
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    Not afraid in the slightest.

    lift+all+the+weights.jpg
  • BarbellApprentice
    BarbellApprentice Posts: 486 Member
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    I've lost over 65lbs now. Woo. Go me.
    I look great in clothes but I am super skinny fat underneath.
    I have a huge Buddha belly and I hate it. I'm already almost underweight bmi so I'm not sure what else to do.
    Started strength training but haven't been eating over maintenance.
    Noob gains have stopped.

    Now I'm stuck.
    After obsessing over the scale going down for over a year it's such a were concept to gain.
    On top of that - My perception of still being fat makes me terrified how I'll look if I attempt to bulk and put on muscle.
    Even if I got muscle wouldn't it just push my already skinnyfat belly and whatnot outwards more?
    Making me look even more chunky?

    I'm also afraid of not doing enough to gain muscle.
    And I also am afraid eating over into a gain will reset my binge eating disorder and I'll never be able to eat at a deficit again...


    I do squats. Deadlifts. And other stuff at the gym.
    I stopped doing cardio to help relax the calorie deficit but i still have one.

    Can anyone ease my fears or reassure me it's the right thing to do?

    Congrats on dropping the 65!
    1. What exactly is your primary goal? I think that is important to establish before heading down one road or another. Drop more fat? Gain muscle?
    2. After eating at a deficit for nearly 2 years, reversing into a bulk was tricky for me and my binge habits. I do NOT want to scare you, but it is not simple for everyone the first go around. If you bulk, go very slowly. Log everything.
  • Makoce
    Makoce Posts: 938 Member
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    Not afraid in the slightest.

    lift+all+the+weights.jpg

    WOO.
  • mortuseon
    mortuseon Posts: 579 Member
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    I'm partway through a bulk right now (done 2 months, aiming for 3 or 4 depending on my progress). Even having done this much, I'm kind of afraid of gaining further because I AM getting bigger and it's an uncomfortable feeling for me. However, I can see progress in my lifts and progress in the firmness of my body so I keep telling myself that it's all for 'the greater good'. I was unhappy when underweight so there's no point going back there. I can always cut later, after all!
  • Makoce
    Makoce Posts: 938 Member
    Options
    I've lost over 65lbs now. Woo. Go me.
    I look great in clothes but I am super skinny fat underneath.
    I have a huge Buddha belly and I hate it. I'm already almost underweight bmi so I'm not sure what else to do.
    Started strength training but haven't been eating over maintenance.
    Noob gains have stopped.

    Now I'm stuck.
    After obsessing over the scale going down for over a year it's such a were concept to gain.
    On top of that - My perception of still being fat makes me terrified how I'll look if I attempt to bulk and put on muscle.
    Even if I got muscle wouldn't it just push my already skinnyfat belly and whatnot outwards more?
    Making me look even more chunky?

    I'm also afraid of not doing enough to gain muscle.
    And I also am afraid eating over into a gain will reset my binge eating disorder and I'll never be able to eat at a deficit again...


    I do squats. Deadlifts. And other stuff at the gym.
    I stopped doing cardio to help relax the calorie deficit but i still have one.

    Can anyone ease my fears or reassure me it's the right thing to do?

    Congrats on dropping the 65!
    1. What exactly is your primary goal? I think that is important to establish before heading down one road or another. Drop more fat? Gain muscle?
    2. After eating at a deficit for nearly 2 years, reversing into a bulk was tricky for me and my binge habits. I do NOT want to scare you, but it is not simple for everyone the first go around. If you bulk, go very slowly. Log everything.

    1. Gain muscle defiantly. I want a more toned, athletic physique instead of just being "skinny".
    2. This does scare me a bit, because more food = more inapt to stuff myself till full, which this triggers binging for me. And small meals throughout the day, .. meh, I like my 2 - 3 meals. So well see how it plays out.

    Defiantly going slow, this is all new to me and I dont want to do it the 'wrong' way.
  • whitebalance
    whitebalance Posts: 1,654 Member
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  • Makoce
    Makoce Posts: 938 Member
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    I'm partway through a bulk right now (done 2 months, aiming for 3 or 4 depending on my progress). Even having done this much, I'm kind of afraid of gaining further because I AM getting bigger and it's an uncomfortable feeling for me. However, I can see progress in my lifts and progress in the firmness of my body so I keep telling myself that it's all for 'the greater good'. I was unhappy when underweight so there's no point going back there. I can always cut later, after all!

    Especially since its getting warmer, and I JUST bought my first ever bikini.
    But, either bulking and gaining fat, or all bloated now - either way I wont be happy in it, so its best to just rock the confidence and wear it abyway, regardless if im losing or gaining I guess!

    Thats my thing, I know itll be super uncomfortable to gain mentally, but youre right .. youre seeing results so when you cut itll be even better

    joined, thanks!
  • mortuseon
    mortuseon Posts: 579 Member
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    Wish I'd known about this 2 months back-!
  • ars1300
    ars1300 Posts: 159 Member
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    Bulking can be done slowly. Increase calories slightly. Many use bulking as an excuse to binge on food, junk etc. You really still need to be feeding your body plenty of good nutrient dense foods during bulking also. Yes it is hard for women to bulk. To see physique changing results you would probably have to not me eating on a deficit for a year and then diee down. Even at that you could probably be lucky to gain 5 pnds of muscle.