help :( i binged!!! 1707 cal down the drain
Replies
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The real reason I posted this is because I know the damage I am doing to my body and I hate it. I want to be able to stop. I wanted to hear what a healthy persons' reaction to a binge that size would be. I honestly really do not want to live like this anymore. I want to change but everywhere I go to ask for help does not take me seriously because of my size.
eating 1700 cals in a day is NOT a binge... its eating at a small deficit for most people...
have you spoken to a doctor? i doubt very much that they would turn you away. if you dont feel somfortable goign on your own, speak to a parent or older friend wo coudl go with you.
I count something as a binge when I am not hungry and yet eating when I feel out of control.
I have spoken to 2 different GP's whom only sent me to do blood tests, none asked the root of the problem or offered to help. I have got my name down for an ED program but the waiting list is a long wait and I need help now ):
i understand why you call it a binge, but to a person with normal eating habits, it's not, and you said you wanted normal peoples reactions...
if you need the help now, go back to the doctor who referred you and tell them that.
It wasn't a doctor who referred me but my psychologist...
.... then go back to your psychologist...
I see her every week?0 -
The real reason I posted this is because I know the damage I am doing to my body and I hate it. I want to be able to stop. I wanted to hear what a healthy persons' reaction to a binge that size would be. I honestly really do not want to live like this anymore. I want to change but everywhere I go to ask for help does not take me seriously because of my size.
eating 1700 cals in a day is NOT a binge... its eating at a small deficit for most people...
have you spoken to a doctor? i doubt very much that they would turn you away. if you dont feel somfortable goign on your own, speak to a parent or older friend wo coudl go with you.
I count something as a binge when I am not hungry and yet eating when I feel out of control.
I have spoken to 2 different GP's whom only sent me to do blood tests, none asked the root of the problem or offered to help. I have got my name down for an ED program but the waiting list is a long wait and I need help now ):
i understand why you call it a binge, but to a person with normal eating habits, it's not, and you said you wanted normal peoples reactions...
if you need the help now, go back to the doctor who referred you and tell them that.
It wasn't a doctor who referred me but my psychologist...
.... then go back to your psychologist...
I see her every week?
so tell her how you feel...0 -
Have you shown her your diary? Show her this thread? Really opened up about what you are doing?0
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Have you shown her your diary? Show her this thread? Really opened up about what you are doing?
No, no and kind of...0 -
Deal with it. It's not the end of the world.0
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Have you shown her your diary? Show her this thread? Really opened up about what you are doing?
No, no and no...
Then I think you have a first step right there, hey? If you can't work out how to just tell her, print this thread out. Print out your diary and your profile. Let her read it then let her start the dialogue. She will understand that you find it hard to talk about and is trained to open that dialogue.0 -
Hmmmm to be honest sweetie, after looking at your diary, you need to talk to someone about your eating disorder, what you are eating is not enough for anyone to live a good happy life.
You will need all your energy to be a great nurse but you WILL NOT be able to do it on that few calories.
The days I looked at were around 600 calories and you exercised.
That is not good for anyone.
Maybe talk to your GP or a Nutritionist
All the best xx0 -
Well we can't quite uneat our calories. Today is a new day, girl. One binge isn't going to make or break you.
Edited after reading comments in this thread: Good luck sweetie. Talk to your psychiatrist and do your best to eat regularly and healthily!0 -
Don't use it as an excuse to quit! We have all been there. It is one day, not a week, not a month, just ONE DAY. It is a speck of sand in the big picture. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, keep on keeping on.0
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The real reason I posted this is because I know the damage I am doing to my body and I hate it. I want to be able to stop. I wanted to hear what a healthy persons' reaction to a binge that size would be. I honestly really do not want to live like this anymore. I want to change but everywhere I go to ask for help does not take me seriously because of my size.
A healthy person wouldn't consider that a binge so they wouldn't react at all.0 -
1700 cals is a binge??? oh.0
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I don't think I have ever "binged" per se. But that's because i give myself a treat day once a month I am allowed to eat whatever the hell I want. I can typically hit 4000 - 5000 calories on these days. Especially since i go out for a meal and drink a decent amount of wine. That my dear is a binge or rather a treat if it's a conscious decision.
1200 is the absolute minimum the NHS recommends a woman eats to avoid serious health issues. You are eating half of that. Honestly your system probably isn't used to dealing with large amounts of food anymore so I would politely suggest increasing your regular intake to at least 1200. And of course seeing a doctor to help with your eating disorder. You have to be forthright and tell him that you are only eating 600 calories most days + exercise.
You need to realize that what you are doing to yourself is every bit as unhealthy as being morbidly obese. You need help.0 -
I don't think I have ever "binged" per se. But that's because i give myself a treat day once a month I am allowed to eat whatever the hell I want. I can typically hit 4000 - 5000 calories on these days. Especially since i go out for a meal and drink a decent amount of wine. That my dear is a binge or rather a treat if it's a conscious decision.
1200 is the absolute minimum the NHS recommends a woman eats to avoid serious health issues. You are eating half of that. Honestly your system probably isn't used to dealing with large amounts of food anymore so I would politely suggest increasing your regular intake to at least 1200. And of course seeing a doctor to help with your eating disorder. You have to be forthright and tell him that you are only eating 600 calories most days + exercise.
You need to realize that what you are doing to yourself is every bit as unhealthy as being morbidly obese. You need help.
I don't do what I do because I want to. I need to take control of something in my life whilst everything else is spiralling out of control. I also do it so that I can try and lower the self hatred just a tiny bit. I do it because EVERY single time I eat something I have a little voice in my head "Stop eating, fatso, you useless piece of junk," going through my head over and over... it's easier to just not deal with that by not eating than deal with it. Plus then afterwards I feel so much guilt and shame because of what I ate. I don't deserve food. It is also a form of punishing myself I believe that I deserve.0 -
Yes I appreciate that. However if you think that any kind of disorder is going to be easy to beat then I'm sorry to inform you that it wont. I am telling you to bring your calorie intake to the absolute minimum required to be decently healthy. If you can't do that right away do it in baby steps. I'm no therapist but try and focus on enjoying the food you eat. I know your going to feel bad about it to begin with but if there's one thing I learned with my own disorders. Which are pretty much the opposite of yours. Is that trying to suppress your desires and focusing on the negative will only make things worse.
When you eat try and drown out that little voice in your head with another. Enthuse about how delicious the food you are eating is going to be. How much it's going to satisfy you and how much you need and deserve it. Imagine it seeping into you and making your organs nice and healthy and adding strength to your muscles and bones. Do your best to see food as a friend not as an enemy. You may not succeed at first but keep trying. Whatever you can eat force yourself to enjoy it as much as you can. I believe this very act will slowly change your attitude towards food.
My problem wasn't like yours it was the other way around. I reached for food as a salve for my depression. I comfort ate and boy did I eat. So I know how hard it is to rework a borked attitude towards food. I had to do the opposite. Every time I weakened and ate something totally bad for me when i wasn't hungry I kept telling myself off in my head about how I was letting myself down. About how bad this was for me I imagined clogged arteries and a congested liver. And after a time it worked for me like a charm. I hope it does for you too.0 -
I don't think I have ever "binged" per se. But that's because i give myself a treat day once a month I am allowed to eat whatever the hell I want. I can typically hit 4000 - 5000 calories on these days. Especially since i go out for a meal and drink a decent amount of wine. That my dear is a binge or rather a treat if it's a conscious decision.
1200 is the absolute minimum the NHS recommends a woman eats to avoid serious health issues. You are eating half of that. Honestly your system probably isn't used to dealing with large amounts of food anymore so I would politely suggest increasing your regular intake to at least 1200. And of course seeing a doctor to help with your eating disorder. You have to be forthright and tell him that you are only eating 600 calories most days + exercise.
You need to realize that what you are doing to yourself is every bit as unhealthy as being morbidly obese. You need help.
I don't do what I do because I want to. I need to take control of something in my life whilst everything else is spiralling out of control. I also do it so that I can try and lower the self hatred just a tiny bit. I do it because EVERY single time I eat something I have a little voice in my head "Stop eating, fatso, you useless piece of junk," going through my head over and over... it's easier to just not deal with that by not eating than deal with it. Plus then afterwards I feel so much guilt and shame because of what I ate. I don't deserve food.
make sure you tell your psychologist about that.
I've been through mental health issues (different ones, but the same thing applies re psychologists)... as extremely difficult as it can be to open up to the psychologist about how you're really feeling and really behaving and everything else (including any negative experiences in your past that have led you to think the way you do about yourself)... your psychologist is the one that can help you get past all of that and to teach yourself how to think in much more healthy ways, and ultimately get your life back.
you do deserve food. You deserve to be happy too. You deserve a life and good mental health. Please if you can't speak to your psychologist about it as in actually say the words, then print out this thread and show it to him or her, so he or she knows what's going on and can help you to start working through all this and towards good mental health.0 -
1707 calories isn't a binge. I eat way more than that in one day!!!!!0
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Besides the advice of eating more...I would lose those "quick added calories"...That's just lazy.
Log what you actually eat...0 -
1707 in a day isnt a binge, and 600 calories in a day is not enough to live on. my dinner tonight is 650 calories.0
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Ive lost 90 lbs and kept it off for 7yrs and in mist of it had my fourth baby my mind set is we eat to live not live to eat. Eat when ur hungry and choose high protein and low sugar foods and tone more than cardio it produces muscles that will burn fat. Ive learned to hate food and love myself, its just food. U can do it.0
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The real reason I posted this is because I know the damage I am doing to my body and I hate it. I want to be able to stop. I wanted to hear what a healthy persons' reaction to a binge that size would be. I honestly really do not want to live like this anymore. I want to change but everywhere I go to ask for help does not take me seriously because of my size.
That's just it "a healthy persons' reaction" would not have reacted because 1707 is NOT a binge. Don't call it that. Instead think, "Today, I ate enough."
Good luck finding your peace.0 -
OP:
Please continue working with the professional and if need be, take this thread with you. You are dealing with multiple mental health issues that are intricate in detail and nobody on this forum will be able to appropriately help you. In addition, you will continue to have a difficult time, if you do not use the tools the professionals provide for you. Dealing with a mental health issue is difficult enough, but dealing with multiple issues is over the top and it will be a long road to recovery. However, it is possible. You deserve to feel well in all aspects of your life. It will take a lot of hard work on your part, but you are worth it.
Is it possible to get a referral to additional support and therapy programs? (weekly visits with multiple professionals that specialize in specific approaches to treatment?)
On another note, I do not know where you live, but I hope this number can help you if you are in crisis.
Call 24/7
1-800-273-8255
You can also chat online here:
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/0 -
OP:
Please continue working with the professional and if need be, take this thread with you. You are dealing with multiple mental health issues that are intricate in detail and nobody on this forum will be able to appropriately help you. In addition, you will continue to have a difficult time, if you do not use the tools the professionals provide for you. Dealing with a mental health issue is difficult enough, but dealing with multiple issues is over the top and it will be a long road to recovery. However, it is possible. You deserve to feel well in all aspects of your life. It will take a lot of hard work on your part, but you are worth it.
Is it possible to get a referral to additional support and therapy programs? (weekly visits with multiple professionals that specialize in specific approaches to treatment?)
On another note, I do not know where you live, but I hope this number can help you if you are in crisis.
Call 24/7
1-800-273-8255
You can also chat online here:
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
Ignore the other comments & focus on this one. You deserve to be happy & healthy in all areas of your life. It will make everything be in balance. Best of luck.0 -
You want to be a nurse and do this to yourself? I'm a nurse and it goes against everything our profession stands for. You want help? From your profile it doesn't sound like you do.0
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Maybe you need to eat more so you don't do "binges". Just a thought. :flowerforyou:
ETA: Just read your profile, PLEASE SEEK HELP!!!!0 -
Take a good look at yourself... You are BEAUTIFUL... and you can do this. Focus on being healthy and not skinny.. your health is whats precious... so eat clean and enjoy what you eat... and you have lost 15 lbs already... Congratulations babe!!0
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OP:
Please continue working with the professional and if need be, take this thread with you. You are dealing with multiple mental health issues that are intricate in detail and nobody on this forum will be able to appropriately help you. In addition, you will continue to have a difficult time, if you do not use the tools the professionals provide for you. Dealing with a mental health issue is difficult enough, but dealing with multiple issues is over the top and it will be a long road to recovery. However, it is possible. You deserve to feel well in all aspects of your life. It will take a lot of hard work on your part, but you are worth it.
Is it possible to get a referral to additional support and therapy programs? (weekly visits with multiple professionals that specialize in specific approaches to treatment?)
On another note, I do not know where you live, but I hope this number can help you if you are in crisis.
Call 24/7
1-800-273-8255
You can also chat online here:
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
Ignore the other comments & focus on this one. You deserve to be happy & healthy in all areas of your life. It will make everything be in balance. Best of luck.
Quoting this again because it should overshadow everything else written here.0 -
You deserve to feel happy in your body, and satisfied with meals without self hatred. You deserve to be heard and acknowledged. I hope that you will find the help that you're looking for.0
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