Any brides out there with advice about dress shopping?

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BurghGirl03
BurghGirl03 Posts: 3
in Introduce Yourself
Hey everyone! I'm currently planning my wedding for October of this year and I am changing my eating habits and becoming more active slowly but surely. I am currently 265lbs (lost 5 lbs in my first week!) and eventually want to reach a goal weight of 140lbs. I know that it will take a long time to reach my goal weight and I'm planning to lose 2 lbs/wk based off of MFP's recommended guidelines.

My question is, how should I go about dress shopping? If I do lose 2lbs/wk between now and my wedding day I will have lost about 46lbs which would put me at 220ish. I'm 5'4" and currently wear a 22/24 in pants and fit into a 20W in wedding dresses. Any idea as to which size I should plan to order?
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  • animatorswearbras
    animatorswearbras Posts: 1,001 Member
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    Yay congratulations

    This is a hard one to answer, the thing is you don't know where you're going to lose the inches when you lose weight, I wouldn't order anything but maybe 1 size or 2 most down from when you make the final decision and choose a style that can be taken in if you lose a lot more than that. Otherwise could you potentially wait a little closer to goal and buy off the rack? In England we have wedding dress sales around Autumn that sell that seasons styles off.

    Having said that my Mum made my wedding dress so perhaps I'm not the best to give advice on buying dresses apart from advice about sizing I got in the shop when I was trying them on to see what style suited me.

    Also I ended up being one size off my wedding date goal size so it's a hard one to guess. x
  • He1loKitty
    He1loKitty Posts: 212 Member
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    You should just buy the size dress that you are NOW. Do not buy a smaller size for a weight that you think you'll be in October. God forbid you do not lose all of the weight you want and are stuck with a dress that is too tight! I can't imagine anything worse happening right before one's wedding. The good thing about buying a dress in your current size is that the seamstresses on staff at most bridal shops are able to take in dresses and make them fit you at a smaller weight. It's so much easier to take in fabric than it is to let it out! The real challenge for a seamstress is letting a dress out to accommodate someone at a heavier weight, hence why I strongly suggest you do not buy a smaller size! Also, keep in mind that most wedding dresses run SMALL. On my wedding day, I was a size 6 dress size, but was wearing a size 12 wedding dress (I had lost some weight and had it taken in, but was not a size 12 in regular clothes when I bought it). This is my advice! Enjoy the dress shopping and don't wait too long if your wedding is in October 2014!!! Mine took seven months to arrive at the shop after I ordered it! :noway:
  • 3dogsrunning
    3dogsrunning Posts: 27,167 Member
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    I echo the sentiment of buy the dress in the size you are when you order it. Dresses can be easily taken in (double check with the saleperson about the style of your dress though), letting it out is not.
    We all have the best intentions but sometimes life gets in the way. Injuries happen. Family members get ill and require attention, things come up. It is life.
    Also keep in mind that weight loss is not linear. Just because you set up to lose 2 lbs a week, does not mean that you will every week. There will be weeks you lose less, stay the same. There might even be weeks where your weight goes up.

    I used to spend a lot time on wedding forums and have seen the other end of buying the dress too small. The last thing you need right before your wedding is stressing over whether a dress will fit or not. Trust me, there is enough to worry about.

    By the dress to fit now, alter it to fit the body you have achieved by then.
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,742 Member
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    I know some people (like the second response you received) order their dresses from boutiques and stuff, and it takes months to get them and then many fittings and alterations and so on.

    I've been married twice and I quite frankly did not have the time, money, or patience for any of that business!! The first time I wore a friend's dress and the second time I did strictly off-the-rack.

    I definitely wouldn't buy a size 20 dress when you are committed to losing weight. But I also wouldn't buy a 14, 16, or 18, either. Because you just don't know what is going to happen to your body in the next several months.

    Unless you are extremely set on a specific dress or style and really must have the "dream dress" in your mind, I'd recommend waiting until like mid-August (yes I know others will gasp and disagree) to shop for a dress and then you could still err a bit on the large size because as the other post said, it's much easier to alter DOWN a size or two than up (which is nearly impossible).

    Good luck!!
  • cuinboston2014
    cuinboston2014 Posts: 848 Member
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    My friend got married in August, I got married in September. When dress shopping, she bought her dress a size smaller. And when it came, it didn't fit. She was planning on losing weight and it didn't happen. That was not a fitting I was glad to be at

    I ordered my dress thinking there was a possibility I would lose weight, but I was between two sizes and still got the bigger one as they can take it in a bit. I also got a corset back that would allow for small fluctuations.

    While I maintained my workouts and eating habits while wedding planning, I did NOT focus on weight at all. Between work, school, my kid, and wedding planning, losing additional weight was the last thing on my mind. Did I want to look good and healthy, yes. Was I going to kill someone because I couldn't drink a glass of wine? No. Be realistic about your goals.

    Do talk to the bridal consultants for their insight as well. Maybe if you lost 10 pounds that might put you in a different dress range iwth the particular style/designer etc so it's a good conversation to have.
  • cuinboston2014
    cuinboston2014 Posts: 848 Member
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    I know some people (like the second response you received) order their dresses from boutiques and stuff, and it takes months to get them and then many fittings and alterations and so on.

    I've been married twice and I quite frankly did not have the time, money, or patience for any of that business!! The first time I wore a friend's dress and the second time I did strictly off-the-rack.

    I definitely wouldn't buy a size 20 dress when you are committed to losing weight. But I also wouldn't buy a 14, 16, or 18, either. Because you just don't know what is going to happen to your body in the next several months.

    Unless you are extremely set on a specific dress or style and really must have the "dream dress" in your mind, I'd recommend waiting until like mid-August (yes I know others will gasp and disagree) to shop for a dress and then you could still err a bit on the large size because as the other post said, it's much easier to alter DOWN a size or two than up (which is nearly impossible).

    Good luck!!

    I died a little when I read this. lol not in a bad way, and you do give solid advice. Just a personal level. I dreamt about my dress - yes I'm one of those annoying girls. I searched for dresses long before I met my husband. I am actually planning to wear my dress again... out with my three sisters... all in wedding dresses lol. I tell my husband all the time if I can get some help getting my corset back tied up he might come home and find me sitting in my dress drinking wine and eating cookies on a bad day lol
  • 3dogsrunning
    3dogsrunning Posts: 27,167 Member
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    I dont disagree with Seltzermint. By now, I mean when you are ordering it. When you order it will depend entirely on what you want. As she pointed out, depending on the dress/style/where you buy it will depend on how long you can wait to order
  • dianalee9
    dianalee9 Posts: 134 Member
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    Buy the size you are when you get measured for it! DO NOT BUY A SMALLER SIZE!!!! I know some people think, "Well, if I buy a smaller size, I have no choice but to lose the weight". Anyone I know who has tried this has failed, and failed miserably! They end up stressing out about losing weight rather than taking the time to enjoy planning their wedding. The dress can be altered when you lose weight.

    I was in a bridal party where one girl ordered her dress 2 sizes too small so she would "force" herself to lose weight. Yeah, it didn't work. She did lose some, but not 2 sizes and the dress looked terrible!! She was uncomfortable all day because the dress had boning and it was cutting into her sides, she also didn't eat all day cause she didn't have any room for it. She left after the first dance cause she couldn't stand it anymore.

    I also know a girl who ordered her wedding dress too small, and was driving all over the place during the month before the wedding to find a store that had a dress in her size in stock. She ended up getting a dress that she didn't want, and now hates her wedding pictures.
  • SapiensPisces
    SapiensPisces Posts: 1,001 Member
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    I know some people (like the second response you received) order their dresses from boutiques and stuff, and it takes months to get them and then many fittings and alterations and so on.

    I've been married twice and I quite frankly did not have the time, money, or patience for any of that business!! The first time I wore a friend's dress and the second time I did strictly off-the-rack.

    I definitely wouldn't buy a size 20 dress when you are committed to losing weight. But I also wouldn't buy a 14, 16, or 18, either. Because you just don't know what is going to happen to your body in the next several months.

    Unless you are extremely set on a specific dress or style and really must have the "dream dress" in your mind, I'd recommend waiting until like mid-August (yes I know others will gasp and disagree) to shop for a dress and then you could still err a bit on the large size because as the other post said, it's much easier to alter DOWN a size or two than up (which is nearly impossible).

    Good luck!!

    ^ I agree.

    Also, bridal gowns tend to run 1-2 sizes small. Wait, see how you do with your weight goals, and order later. It's better to order bigger and have it taken in.

    Plus, nobody sees the size but you anyway (well, and your husband, but I guarantee he won't care as long as it comes off on the wedding night!).
  • leggup
    leggup Posts: 2,942 Member
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    First, find out how late you can order your dress. Some styles can take longer, require more customization, etc.

    Second, find out if there's any give and take in the design. I bought a sample sale dress that was 2 sizes too big for me when I tried it on/bought it off the rack. By the time of my final fitting, it had been taken in 3-4 sizes.

    Third, find out if your bridal store has a good alterations department.

    Fourth, order the dress in the size that you are on the final date that you can get your measurements taken. Do not get it smaller than you are unless it is impossible to take in at all. Most dresses can be taken in. Usually they take them in at the sides to preserve the detail in the back.
  • ros2will3run
    ros2will3run Posts: 104 Member
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    Hi,
    hope that you are well.
    Congratulations!
    Me,I am not getting married any time soon..however, as same dress size as you, and same height,
    and have an October goal..finish a five yr course of studies, and put myself down for a good long run..well,
    a half marathon, and now i am at the walking stage..and lost about 2 pounds..but feel better and trimmer..
    Well, not sure if i'll be fit for a half marathon in Oct, but will train towards it.

    If you want, add me as a pal, and see if you or i achieve the aim of being fit and hopefully slimmer>?
    ps..i start walking/ running on treadmill this weekend!!
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
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    Wait for the last possible minute to order. Make sure the dress can be altered. If you like the ones that lace up the back that can be a good option to allow yourself some room.

    I joined MFP to lose weight for my wedding. I didn't want to order my dress too small in hopes I'd fit in it later (generally, that doesn't go well) so I ordered it to fit me, but I ordered it too soon. By the time I got to the week of my wedding I had lost 3 sizes and my dress just couldn't accommodate that much altering so it looked pretty bad.

    If I was going to do it again, I wouldn't order until it was close to the big day, and then I'd switch to maintenance after final alterations to make sure the dress still fit the day of the wedding.
  • Linnaea27
    Linnaea27 Posts: 639 Member
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    Congratulations to a fellow engaged person! :)

    I'd say that when dress shopping, ask how easy it is to alter each style when you try it on. Significant alterations can cost a chunk extra-- and on some styles are hard to do.

    Maybe consider a dress from BHLDN, where you can order a dress, you get it quickly, and can send it back if you don't like it, rather than a traditional bridal salon where you have to order so far in advance?

    I second britishbroccoli's suggestion of getting measured for it and ordering as late as possible.
  • cupkate30
    cupkate30 Posts: 8 Member
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    I ordered my dress smaller than what I actually was wearing at the time I placed my order. It motivated me to lose the weight so I could fit into my dream dress. I lost about 30 lbs over the course of 9 months and my dress fit perfectly. I ordered a size 12, but dresses do run small. By the time my dress fit, I was wearing a size 4-6 in real life.
  • schelly81
    schelly81 Posts: 161 Member
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    I bought a dress that fit me and I'm glad I did. I had to have it taken in a size about a month before my wedding but I had planned on losing 6 sizes. My sister was my maid of honor and ordered a bridesmaid's dress a size small. She was planning on losing ten pounds but gained ten instead. It cost her more to have it let out then the dress itself cost her. I'm in a wedding in September this year and I plan on being down about 30 pounds but I'm going to order a dress that fits me now.
  • shirerose
    shirerose Posts: 116 Member
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    hi! i got married last october! congrats btw! october is a wonderful month to get married! i have 2 giant pieces of advice for any bride willing to listen. 1. make sure you get a really great photographer... do not hire a friend unless they have a photography business. 2. do not order your dress in a smaller size. i can't stress that second thing enough! my experience: i bought my dress in January (with my wedding happening in october) from david's bridal. the day i went in to try dresses i was bloated from the holidays and had already lost lots of weight the year before and was continuing my weight loss "journey". the dress i ended up falling in love with was a plus size dress... size 14. it looked amazing on me and had the perfect amount of coverage for my chest and everything else. i was dumb and couldn't get over the fact that it was plus size... when i had worked so hard to not be plus size anymore. at the time, i was wearing a size 12 from non-plus size stores. and i thought my plus size days were behind me! so i looked up the measurements for the regular size 14 dress in the same style and decided to change my order to that. the measurements were only an inch or so smaller all over. i could surely lose an inch all over before the dress fitting in august! ugggggh!!! such a dumb dumb dumb idea. i was stressed out already about having to plan a wedding... but then i added the incredible stress of having to lose weight in order to fit into my dress!! it drove me insane. luckily... i just barely fit into the dress... and it looked fabulous... but... my chest... the amount of fabric used in the chest area for the non-plus size dress is way less! i ended up having massive cleavage and felt slightly uncomfortable about it the whole day. it didn't at all ruin my day... not even close... but it's one of those things i could have easily avoided by just ordering the dress in my size that i was fitted for. and then i could have gotten it taken in if i ended up losing more weight. anyway... please don't make my mistake. :) don't put that stress on yourself. dresses can always be taken in... but can only be taken out a small amount. i hope this helps!! plus size clothing is made for curvier ladies... i shouldn't have cared so much about the size on the label!
  • swissbrit
    swissbrit Posts: 201
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    I have lost 15kgs since I decided to get married (my wedding is in 50 days) I shopped around tried on different shapes and sizes and asked them what the minimum was to order a dress closer to the wedding...... i only bought mine last week had the fitting yesterday so just ask all the questions at a store that has lots of different dresses that you like and THEN MAKE A PLAN :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: Good LUCK
  • kb1927
    kb1927 Posts: 32 Member
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    I went dress shopping three months pregnant and bought several sizes bigger to accommodate what the shop attendant and I thought would be a big pregnant belly, and I made arrangements to have a fitting two weeks before the wedding (which is apparently not the norm...see if you can get special arrangements too). Our daughter was stillborn a month before the wedding, and the seamstress did a great job taking in the huge dress. If I had to do it again, I'd still buy big and get it altered as near to the wedding as possible. If you go that route, it might be worth it to check out which dress styles are easier to take in (I'm sure strapless are easier than sleeves, for instance) and see if your tastes run along those lines. Congratulations on the engagement!
  • AlliSteff
    AlliSteff Posts: 211 Member
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    I know that if you pick a dress that needs to be ordered out, you could be waiting 7 months!

    Do not, I repeat DO NOT, order down a size. I got married 3 years ago and almost did that...but you know what? I ended up planning a move, a wedding, finding a new job in a new city all in thsoe 6 months and working out fell to the wayside.

    Now, I ordered down a size in my Maid of Honor dress for my sister's wedding this July, but only because I fit (a little tightly) into that size in November when we ordered them and had already been working out like crazy. I also knew I did not have the stressful task of planning the wedding....so I guess we will see when the dress arrives!
  • Missjulesdid
    Missjulesdid Posts: 1,444 Member
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    I was between sizes and opted for the smaller size because it was the size they had in stock and was half price! ALSO, I got a corset dress so really, I can go up or down a size very easily in that dress and it looks great. I got the dress a few months ago and it was a bit too small..... but the dress fits perfectly now and It can simply be laced tighter in the unlikely event that I lose 10 more pounds in the next 16 days.


    Oh yes, and I went to a boutique that specializes in plus sizes so I was actually able to try EVERY dress on. Smartest thing I ever did.

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