I think I'm an addict??

Drinking more water to feel full helps, also have snacks on standby helps me too, what i mean by snack is carrot sticks, celery, salads, anything with low cal and high volumes. I do occasionally eat pizza and cookies myself but in moderation. Dont beat urself up on it. Know yourself and how you react and try to find ways to trick yourself. Use smaller spoons and forks and also use smaller bowls for servings, its all about trickery, LOL.

Cravings happen for a variety of reasons- nutrient deficiency, TOM, stress/emotional triggers. Before you can figure out how to tackle your cravings, you have to figure out *why* you're craving these things. More often than not, there's an emotional component to overeating. Only you can figure that part out.

ETA: Log EVERY.SINGLE.THING. you put in your mouth. The first step for me in this whole thing (and I had been logging for well over a year, halfassedly) was being completely honest with myself. Seeing the stark reality of what I'd done, in numbers, was the tipping point for me. Not only did I hate feeling the way I did post-binge, but it was actually frightening to me, seeing how many calories I overate. I made my diary private

Don't get me wrong, it wasn't like doing that was a magic cure- I spent the following month battling binge desires, and failing about half the time, even though they were well mitigated. The biggest thing I can tell you is drink a lot of fluids- unsweetened tea and water. And when you want something- portion out a serving. After you eat it, drink water and wait twenty minutes. And possibly most importantly- eat plenty of protein. 20+ grams at breakfast, 20+ grams at lunch, and AT LEAST 20+ grams at dinner. I notice that's when I do best and keep the cravings at bay. Oh, and dark chocolate.

I used to be that way, and probably still can be if I don't focus. For me, it is all about breaking the cycle and being prepared. I make sure that I am eating a variety of foods (including the processed and sweets) so that I do not get as many of the cravings. I almost always have a protein bar in my purse for the "just in case I can't live without chocolate" moment. And, when I started this journey (and several others in the past), I had to do what I call my initial purge- I was not really able to eat an actual serving of my "fault" foods until two weeks had gone by. For instance, if I craved ice cream, I would have some fruit and maybe two or three bites of ice cream or a 1/2 cup of yogurt. When I crave the greasy "faults", I have to drink a glass of water and eat a salad before I can have 1/2 of a serving (slice of pizza or hamburger, whatever it is). This helps me to stay focused, in control and feeling fuller before I indulge in the not as healthy stuff. I have also found, that after the first two weeks, most of that stuff gives me a terrible stomach ache with just a small amount. I don't have any suggestions on your "black our binge eating" periods.

First of all, be assured that you are NOT alone in this....there are hundreds of us here on MFP who have the exact same problem. So you're definitely not nuts or weird or anything like that! You're in very good company. Many people here have overcome this issue and manage it beautifully (myself included) and you can too!

It sounds to me like you may have issues with what's known as "compulsive overeating". Some call it a food addiction, some don't. But no matter what you choose to call it, it makes you feel out of control, miserable, and hopeless. It's also kind of scary - you described this experience of "leaving yourself" and going into a sort of automatic mode where you kind of "wake up later" and realize what you've done. This is extremely common for compulsive overeaters so again, you are not alone. The good news is that it IS stoppable, you CAN be in control, you CAN be present, and you CAN be happy. There is definitely hope so don't be discouraged.

I like to give out the following link for a quiz that helps determine if you have issues with compulsive overeating:
http://www.stopcompulsiveeating.com/foodquiz.php

If you answered "yes" to the majority of these questions, you may have these issues and might want to explore the possibility. Like some have suggested, meeting with a counselor who specializes in this area is a great place to start. Also, there is TONS of articles, information, and literature available on this issue so you can start to educate yourself on how to deal with it. Simply Google "compulsive overeating" and go for it.

Here is the wikipedia article on it, to get you started. See if you identify: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Compulsive_overeating

I also highly recommend you check out the Overeaters Anonymous program. Whether or not you believe you have a food addiction, the OA program has a very solid process for helping people overcome these issues. Their 12 steps and 9 tools of recovery are powerful and help you get down deep into some of the roots of why you do what you do, and how to deal with it. You could even consider attending a meeting - the support groups are phenomenal.

Hopefully this helps. Again, I don't want to "diagnose" you with this issue as you know yourself best. It just sounds awfully familiar with what I dealt with, and what other CO's here have dealt with, so I'm simply suggesting you might want to at least explore it as an option. If you have any questions, feel free to contact me in a PM! Blessings.

If you feel like you are an addict and out of control, please contact an addiction therapist and seek treatment in a 12 step program. Getting a sponsor may also help.