To all of you who have lost substantial amounts of weight...

WVmom24
WVmom24 Posts: 266 Member
You should be taking every chance you can to mess with people by telling them you did it in some ridiculous way.

"You lost 150lbs in 18 months? How?!"

"I ate three raw pinecones every day."

or

"I found that food inserted rectally absorbs less calories than if you eat it."

or

"I attach leeches to my feet before bed every third Tuesday."


....Otherwise you're doing it wrong.

Replies

  • MrMax
    MrMax Posts: 73 Member
    Bwahaha! Love it!
  • yungibear
    yungibear Posts: 138 Member
    Ahah! This is my style of humor! I would love to troll people in the future!
  • tl_dr
    tl_dr Posts: 96
    Definitely saving the pine cone diet idea for a later date. :glasses:
  • TheFitHooker
    TheFitHooker Posts: 3,357 Member
    I've done something like this a few times

    "I just woke up one day and it came off."

    "I realized life wasn't like a box of Chocolates, you can choose the one you want, you just gotta eat them all. After all, Chocolate is a plant, there for it's healthy."

    "I switched my religion from Christian to believing in many god's and I pray to the skinny one the most, so he/she's helping me out."

    "I ate the placenta after my last child was born and it turned me thinner, the next day I pooped so much that my tummy shrieked"

    "I eat skinny people, they say you are what you eat."

    HEHE!! I love a moment to be a smart *kitten*.
  • DeeDeeMee
    DeeDeeMee Posts: 133 Member
    This is awesome! I'm going to have to try some of these! :):)
  • _Zardoz_
    _Zardoz_ Posts: 3,987 Member
    I actually lost my weight by every full moon I would strip naked and run through the streets at midnight covered in golden syrup. Due to the gravity created by a full moon all the fat is pulled out of you. This way you can eat as you were before and still lose weight.
  • TheFitHooker
    TheFitHooker Posts: 3,357 Member
    I actually lost my weight by every full moon I would strip naked and run through the streets at midnight covered in golden syrup. Due to the gravity created by a full moon all the fat is pulled out of you. This way you can eat as you were before and still lose weight.

    BAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
  • checomgeo
    checomgeo Posts: 25 Member
    THEFULL MOON IS MAKING ME LOL! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • Sex. Lots of sex
  • dtimedwards
    dtimedwards Posts: 319 Member
    Ice cream and whisky. Lots and lots of ice cream and whisky.

    Oh wait... I really did lose lots of weight while eating lots of ice cream and drinking lots of whisky.
  • Hahaha I love this I'm so going to start telling people this stuff!
  • AshwinA7
    AshwinA7 Posts: 102 Member
    I'm just gonna tell them if they just chug 1 gallon of milk the weight comes off instantly.
  • CrusaderSam
    CrusaderSam Posts: 180 Member
    I think its better to try to help as much as I can and give them the real deal when they ask me. People only ask if they want to lose or they have some one in their life that needs to lose a large amount of weight. Every so often, I do run in to people that wont care what I say, and will only want to hear what they already have in their heads reinforced.

    This is when I take the gloves off and tell them "the true secret they don't want you to know about" I would only eat dried out dog turds that I would find walking the streets at night while fighting crime. Why? BECAUSE I AM BATMAN!
  • zeal26
    zeal26 Posts: 602 Member
    I think its better to try to help as much as I can and give them the real deal when they ask me. People only ask if they want to lose or they have some one in their life that needs to lose a large amount of weight. Every so often, I do run in to people that wont care what I say, and will only want to hear what they already have in their heads reinforced.

    This is when I take the gloves off and tell them "the true secret they don't want you to know about" I would only eat dried out dog turds that I would find walking the streets at night while fighting crime. Why? BECAUSE I AM BATMAN!

    Everyone seems incredibly disappointed when I tell them how I'm actually doing it (portion control and exercise). Yet when my friend posted that she lost 9b in 2 weeks from some 'cleanse' diet everyone was alllll over her, saying this is exactly what they need and praising her for her dedication...
  • malcolmjcooper
    malcolmjcooper Posts: 79 Member
    Everyone seems incredibly disappointed when I tell them how I'm actually doing it (portion control and exercise). Yet when my friend posted that she lost 9b in 2 weeks from some 'cleanse' diet everyone was alllll over her, saying this is exactly what they need and praising her for her dedication...
    I have to agree with this but still batman is cool haha
  • Wonderob
    Wonderob Posts: 1,372 Member
    You should be taking every chance you can to mess with people by telling them you did it in some ridiculous way.

    "You lost 150lbs in 18 months? How?!"

    "I ate three raw pinecones every day."

    or

    "I found that food inserted rectally absorbs less calories than if you eat it."

    or

    "I attach leeches to my feet before bed every third Tuesday."


    ....Otherwise you're doing it wrong.

    "I have these incredible little pills that you take just one of every morning, then you just eat whatever you want and there's no need to exercise. The weight just falls off! In fact, I just happen to have a year's supply of these little 'Skittle' shaped pills that I can let you have for just $400. Just swallow them whole with water. The green ones take the place of fruit and vegetables too"
  • mspoopoo
    mspoopoo Posts: 500 Member
    I would just deny losing weight. Tell them they must be blind. I haven't lost a single ounce.
  • TEMMEAlexa
    TEMMEAlexa Posts: 79 Member
    I try to go straight. Just tell them what made you lose that much weight, and leave it on them whether they decide to believe or not. It might help some one lose a little weight, and there will be a little guidance or help from me too. I would be glad for that.
  • Karabobarra
    Karabobarra Posts: 782 Member
    Love this idea....this is probably how raspberry keytones started...lol
  • Wonderob
    Wonderob Posts: 1,372 Member
    I would just deny losing weight. Tell them they must be blind. I haven't lost a single ounce.

    "You must be thinking of my chubby twin, Amelia. We don't let her out of the house any more"
  • hmaddpear
    hmaddpear Posts: 610 Member
    I would just deny losing weight. Tell them they must be blind. I haven't lost a single ounce.

    I'm so going to do this! I'll just tell them that I'm dressing differently now, which is probably making me look thinner!

    While I agree with the poster above that in the main we should be helpful and spread the secret of success, sometimes it's like banging your head against a brick wall. I'll definitely save some of these for those occasions!
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