OBESE AND NEED HELP!

I'm 43 years old and weigh 378 lbs. I'm obviously not a health food nut but how can I force myself to eat better? I don't think drastic changes will be a good thing. Need some guidance on this eating better thing!
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Replies

  • BekaBooluvsu
    BekaBooluvsu Posts: 470 Member
    Try changing one thing in your diet to a healthier option.

    Example: I love candy. I switched from candy bars to protein bars among other things.
  • dreawest
    dreawest Posts: 208 Member
    I totally understand. I was 340 at my highest and am 290 now. Having made some changes it seems easier now but at the beginning it was so daunting that I could barely start. Now I delay breakfast and just have light food through the day so I can have a big dinner and treat at night (man can I eat at night). But one of the best things for me was just starting to log my food as I had no idea how much was in different foods. You will find foods that you enjoy, fill you up, and fit in your goals so logging is the key to starting.
  • BDOUG2371
    BDOUG2371 Posts: 29 Member
    Dreawest, thanks for the quick reply. I could go all morning and most of the day without food,I seem hungrier mid-afternoon and night. I logged my food the past 20 days here and it's embarrassing. I can eat!!!
  • LoupGarouTFTs
    LoupGarouTFTs Posts: 916 Member
    Sodium is my bugaboo--I have a real hard time controlling it. Although I've heard that the daily recommendation for sodium is far lower than what it should be, I do notice some water retention and difficulty losing weight if I greatly exceed that recommendation. I'm not saying be fixated on sodium, but you might want to keep an eye on it to improve your efficiency losing weight. I also agree with the idea of making gradual changes. As other people have said, this weight loss is a marathon, not a sprint, and we shouldn't be in a hurry to do anything too quickly.


    ETA: Forgot to mention--congrats for coming here and GOOD LUCK!
  • aronao
    aronao Posts: 112 Member
    Hi

    I can only be honest with you because you have asked for help and there's no easy way to put it to you

    You need to stop eating out
    You need to eat less, a lot less
    You need to eat real fresh food
    You need to start with eating a decent breakfast
    You need to examine and deal with the reasons why you eat what you eat and how much you eat
    You do need to do something drastic
    You need to seek medical advice about how you might achieve all this in a healthy way
  • yarwell
    yarwell Posts: 10,477 Member
    If you're going to spend your whole time eating in fast food joints then you could start by divorcing the potato - no more mash, fries, chips, etc. That would put a dent in the calorie and carb intake for starters.
  • GiveMeCoffee
    GiveMeCoffee Posts: 3,556 Member
    Congrats on taking the hardest step and that's getting started.

    You've logged food, so you are starting that learning process. You don't need to do anything drastic and you don't need to start eating breakfast if that's not how you like to eat. What you do need to do is start cutting your calories back, you actually aren't eating a ton of food, I can eat more :) but what you are eating is very high calorie.

    Do you ever cook at home? How tall are? and how old are you sorry if I missed it (still on my 1st cup of coffee)
  • MelodyandBarbells
    MelodyandBarbells Posts: 7,724 Member
    Can you try cooking one or two of your favorite foods at home, if you don't already? I used to be a fast food fiend, and probably still eat more meals out than I should. Making chicken strips at home, for example, really cut down on calorie intake because I wasn't going to DQ and getting the basket of strips, fries, Texas toast, dipping sauces, and maybe even a blizzard, even though all I really was craving were the strips. And then you get to the point that your version tastes better to you than the fast food one and you don't even want to waste your time waiting in line

    I have the allrecipes.com app on my phone. I believe it's free. I use it to search for whatever I'm craving and pick the most delicious sounding recipe with fewest ingredients LOL. 20 ingredients? I'm outa there. Five ingredients? Sign me up!

    If you make your own food though, you may wish to start with smaller quantities so you're not tempted to eat up eight burgers at a time, for example. The end game is still controlling the number of calories. It won't matter if Popeyes made it or if you did, if you are still consuming the same calories
  • aeb09
    aeb09 Posts: 424 Member
    "Forcing" yourself to eat better is setting yourself up for failure; you'll feel deprived and bitter. When I finally changed my lifestyle it's because I did a lot of thinking first and was finally honest with myself. I put my goals out there, I realized where my health and future were heading if I didn't change, I finally understood that food is just fuel and I needed to cut my emotional ties with it. I learned to like vegetables and to make satisfying, filling meals that didn't include bread, pasta, grains or sugar (for medical reasons). You don't have to do that though - you can start by learning portion control. Eat everything you like now but learn what 1 serving is, especially at restaurants. If you find you go overboard when you go out to eat, make a majority of meals at home. Substitute vegetables for fries sometimes, get grilled chicken instead of fried, brown rice instead of white. These little changes will add up over time.

    The most motivating thought for me is that I didn't get fat in one month so I'm not going to lose the weight in one month either. There is a learning curve and it is a process. If you wake up every day trying to do your best, you'll see results.
  • BigGuy47
    BigGuy47 Posts: 1,768 Member
    I don't think drastic changes will be a good thing.
    You need a drastic change, but it doesn't have to happen overnight.
    Make a small change every week and be consistent for an entire year. Change one thing in your diet or start walking for exercise. Keep making these small changes and eventually you will change your lifestyle. Be disciplined and be patient - change will happen.
  • BDOUG2371
    BDOUG2371 Posts: 29 Member
    Hi

    I can only be honest with you because you have asked for help and there's no easy way to put it to you

    You need to stop eating out
    You need to eat less, a lot less
    You need to eat real fresh food
    You need to start with eating a decent breakfast
    You need to examine and deal with the reasons why you eat what you eat and how much you eat
    You do need to do something drastic
    You need to seek medical advice about how you might achieve all this in a healthy way

    Thank you. :).
  • BDOUG2371
    BDOUG2371 Posts: 29 Member
    Congrats on taking the hardest step and that's getting started.

    You've logged food, so you are starting that learning process. You don't need to do anything drastic and you don't need to start eating breakfast if that's not how you like to eat. What you do need to do is start cutting your calories back, you actually aren't eating a ton of food, I can eat more :) but what you are eating is very high calorie.

    Do you ever cook at home? How tall are? and how old are you sorry if I missed it (still on my 1st cup of coffee)

    Thank you for replying. I am 6'2" and I am 43 years old. As for eating more, I could do a lot more than what I logged. That's cutting down believe it or not...LOL. I DON't USUALLY FEEL FULL. I sent a friends request, it's easier for me that way to get my messages but if you want to write here, it's ok. BTW, saw your pictures, you look great!
  • BDOUG2371
    BDOUG2371 Posts: 29 Member
    Can you try cooking one or two of your favorite foods at home, if you don't already? I used to be a fast food fiend, and probably still eat more meals out than I should. Making chicken strips at home, for example, really cut down on calorie intake because I wasn't going to DQ and getting the basket of strips, fries, Texas toast, dipping sauces, and maybe even a blizzard, even though all I really was craving were the strips. And then you get to the point that your version tastes better to you than the fast food one and you don't even want to waste your time waiting in line

    I have the allrecipes.com app on my phone. I believe it's free. I use it to search for whatever I'm craving and pick the most delicious sounding recipe with fewest ingredients LOL. 20 ingredients? I'm outa there. Five ingredients? Sign me up!

    If you make your own food though, you may wish to start with smaller quantities so you're not tempted to eat up eight burgers at a time, for example. The end game is still controlling the number of calories. It won't matter if Popeyes made it or if you did, if you are still consuming the same calories

    Thank you for the reply. I need to eat home more, you're very right. :). I don't like the DQ fries so I get onion rings and those are just as bad.:(. I was a skinny person in the first part of my life. Somehow I got it to the point I never feel full. Thanks for heads up on the app.
  • BDOUG2371
    BDOUG2371 Posts: 29 Member
    "Forcing" yourself to eat better is setting yourself up for failure; you'll feel deprived and bitter. When I finally changed my lifestyle it's because I did a lot of thinking first and was finally honest with myself. I put my goals out there, I realized where my health and future were heading if I didn't change, I finally understood that food is just fuel and I needed to cut my emotional ties with it. I learned to like vegetables and to make satisfying, filling meals that didn't include bread, pasta, grains or sugar (for medical reasons). You don't have to do that though - you can start by learning portion control. Eat everything you like now but learn what 1 serving is, especially at restaurants. If you find you go overboard when you go out to eat, make a majority of meals at home. Substitute vegetables for fries sometimes, get grilled chicken instead of fried, brown rice instead of white. These little changes will add up over time.

    The most motivating thought for me is that I didn't get fat in one month so I'm not going to lose the weight in one month either. There is a learning curve and it is a process. If you wake up every day trying to do your best, you'll see results.

    Thank you. I actually got a grilled chicken sandwich instead of fried tenders. It did eat some of the appetizer that we got.
  • QueensGirl83
    QueensGirl83 Posts: 54 Member
    As you go along in your journey, you will discover what works best for you. At first I tried to eat very light during the morning and afternoon so that I could eat a lot at night because, just like you, that's when my hunger really used to kick in. I then realized that by eating larger meals for breakfast and lunch, I was then able to control my hunger a lot better in the afternoon and that seems to be working great for me for now. I think the first couple of weeks are the hardest, but now it seems like time is just flying by and signing into here every day is almost like second nature to me. There are still bad days but as long as you train yourself to get back on the wagon right away, you will see the numbers on the scale go down.
  • gmallan
    gmallan Posts: 2,099 Member
    Dreawest, thanks for the quick reply. I could go all morning and most of the day without food,I seem hungrier mid-afternoon and night. I logged my food the past 20 days here and it's embarrassing. I can eat!!!

    If that's what works for you there's no need to force yourself to eat in the morning. You may want to try intermittent fasting lean gains style. It means you eat all your food for the day in a smaller time frame (say 8 hours). There are benefits from an extended fast window and it allows you eat bigger meals.

    http://www.leangains.com/2010/04/leangains-guide.html

    Small sustainable changes are the way to go. Pick one thing you are about 90% sure you can change and work on that. Once you've got that under control, pick another
  • nomad1966
    nomad1966 Posts: 74
    I was a big guy too. Not the 300 range but my waist was in the 40s
    I was told about this ketogenic diet from Excalibur Weight Loss. It worked for me but may not work for everyone. Check I to it. You've nothing to loose but weight.
  • SanteMulberry
    SanteMulberry Posts: 3,202 Member
    Dreawest, thanks for the quick reply. I could go all morning and most of the day without food,I seem hungrier mid-afternoon and night. I logged my food the past 20 days here and it's embarrassing. I can eat!!!

    I was 240 when I started, and am 174 now. I have been on this journey for three years and, in that time, I have never gained anything back because I changed WHAT I ate as well as changing the amount--although, one of the things I discovered is that I was eating too little when I would "diet"--which made it unsustainable. I kept changing things a little at a time. I knew that I couldn't "afford" junk food if I was going to get healthier. First I cut out added sugar in anything (that did a LOT to stop the weight gain and even caused some weight loss. Then I started adding more vegetables and fruits. And that caused me to lose more weight, Then I cut out wheat and not only did I lose more weight but health problems decreased or went away. Then I added even more vegetables and cut out some of the fruit (no more than one or two servings a day). Then I started exercising more than I have ever exercised in my life (two sessions of cardio and three sessions of bodyweight and weight-lifting a week). And then I simply started moving more--found projects to begin that I had been putting off because I was "too tired". And slowly but surely, my body fat level got to be better than it has ever been in my adult life (even though I weigh more than I did as a twenty-something). My percentage of body fat continues to decline. I will likely lose 4 to 7 pounds yet this year and since it is very slow, it will likely be fat and not lean tissue (which is why most people regain--they lose lean body mass because they try to do it too quickly and they try to do it without exercise).
  • booksgiver
    booksgiver Posts: 147 Member
    First, good for you to post your food diary. I know there are many of us who may feel embarressed over some of our food choices or when we go over our calorie goals. Seriously though if you really want to lose weight and be healthier you've got to get your head involved in making better decisions about what you're going to eat. Please understand that it is YOUR choice to make, not that nagging little voice that wants everything. I can totally relate to never feeling full and it continues to be a problem for me, but the difference now from a year and half ago is that I make substitutions for the high calorie foods I used to eat. I'm an admitted food addict and that means that I have difficulty controlling my portions. Sometimes for a food addict it may be abstaining from certan trigger foods. Some folks here can eat a half cup of ice cream or a small piece of cake. Not me. The main thing that has helped me is dealing with my cravings in low calorie ways. I love potatoes....love them. I eat one nearly every day, but it's baked, or microwaved, never fried. I now sugar free popscicles at 15 calories a piece instead of ice cream. I have air popped popcorn instead of any kind of chips. I have the no fat hotdogs at 45 calories each instead of the DQ ones or regular ones. Onions are grilled or used in stirfry, not deep fried. I have lean beef, lean pork, and chicken can be prepared many ways that are low in calories. Instead of regular bread, I choose the sandwich slims at 90 calories each. I eat lots of veggies and they too don't have to be bland but can be prepared in delicious ways. For sweets I depend on the no sugar bars such as Kashi at about 140 calories each and many flavor choices. Also like you i tend to have more of an appetite later in the day and I'm a snacker, so this requires planning. I have a very light breakfast and lunch and save my larger meal for dinner, and I also save some calories for snacks. So it's untimately about choices and your will to be make them. It's also about having a life of some quality instead of being a slave to our, dare I say it, gluttoney. Well, for me, it's what I was, a glutton who ate completely out of control and it is only through managing those urges that I've been able to lose 118 pounds. I am disabled and sedentary, my exercise is limited, so that too proves that you can lose weight by reducing calories alone. I surely know that you can achieve your goals, but you must be willing to accept that it may feel tough, especially at first as you're making new and better habits. Set your goals and be realistic then make the decision that this what you WILL DO, and you can.
    Good luck to you...and I do understand.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    All you need is a caloric deficit to get you started.

    No need to torture yourself giving up the foods you love and that's the truth.
  • FattyFatsoMcTubby
    FattyFatsoMcTubby Posts: 170 Member
    I totally understand. I was 340 at my highest and am 290 now. Having made some changes it seems easier now but at the beginning it was so daunting that I could barely start. Now I delay breakfast and just have light food through the day so I can have a big dinner and treat at night (man can I eat at night). But one of the best things for me was just starting to log my food as I had no idea how much was in different foods. You will find foods that you enjoy, fill you up, and fit in your goals so logging is the key to starting.

    ^^^ This is good advice. You have to find what works for you, but finding low calorie filling foods that you like is great start.
  • UmmSqueaky
    UmmSqueaky Posts: 715 Member
    I looked through a few days of your diary. I think the first change you should make is to limit yourself to eating out once a day. Eating out was my problem too, but since I'm a short woman, all it took was one meal out a day to put me far above my calorie limit. Since you're a taller guy, you have more room to fit a fast food meal in every day.

    Do that for a few days, eat breakfast and a dinner full of veggies at home. See if you can keep it under your calorie limit.

    Then start to move. Doesn't have to be some fancy form of exercise. Go for a walk, adding a few more minutes each day. There's a mantra that goes around MFP - eat less, move more. Usually, it really is that simple.
  • Try changing one thing in your diet to a healthier option.

    Example: I love candy. I switched from candy bars to protein bars among other things.

    BekaBooluvsu is right. Obviously, a drastic change does need to be made but steps at a time. Like she said, switch more unhealthful foods in your everyday diet to more healthful options.

    I would also recommend never eating after a certain time of night (eg, I stop eating at 8pm everyday) because any food in your stomach while youre sleeping will never be used for energy, so it's a waste.

    And drink SO much water. Go for 3L OF WATER a day. Nothing with caffeine or alcohol counts, but you should also stay away from excess cordials, milk, soft drinks, etc.

    Then work towards a big breakfast, and then progressively smaller meals throughout the day. This helps with the wasted calories you sleep on, as well as helping reduce night time bingeing.

    But you've joined here, and you've expressed a will to change, so as long as you stay strong it will work for you!! No doubt!
  • kethry70
    kethry70 Posts: 404 Member
    I don't kno how much protein you are getting as I can't see that in your diary - but I would concentrate on eating %35-40% of your calories from protein and add in rich fiber sources. Your fiber is REALLY low- fiber is not only good for you, but it also helps you feel full longer (as does protein). Since that seems to be an issue for you- that would be where I would start. If you replaced one meal a day with a good sized amount of chicken breast or a grilled steak, some brown rice, and some veggies at home, it would make a big impact. Good Luck!! Yuo can totally do this :smile:
  • First off congrats for starting an account here and being honest on your food diary. Myself, when I track my food and see how many calories i'm consuming I'm allot more hesitant to eat that burger/fries because I know I'm going to have to input those calories. So keep inputting your foods.

    Start off easy:
    no sugar
    no fried foods
    No white carbs-flour products
    Then as you start to lose weight you wil learn more and more about eating whole non-processed foods.

    Also, on any social media site you are on....instagram, twitter, facebook etc......follow fitness-minded people. seeing positive posts, workout posts, healthy eating posts all day in your news feed keeps you in that frame of mind. Surround yourself by individuals that lead a healthy lifestyle.

    Good luck. You cany totally do this.
  • UmmSqueaky
    UmmSqueaky Posts: 715 Member
    Start off easy:
    no sugar
    no fried foods
    No white carbs-flour products
    Then as you start to lose weight you wil learn more and more about eating whole non-processed foods.

    That's a pretty scary and hard thing to tell someone who eats only processed meals from restaurants. How is that easy? Heck, why is it necessary? I eat all of those things and lose weight.
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    All you need is a caloric deficit to get you started.

    No need to torture yourself giving up the foods you love and that's the truth.

    :drinker:
  • MelodyandBarbells
    MelodyandBarbells Posts: 7,724 Member
    Try changing one thing in your diet to a healthier option.

    Example: I love candy. I switched from candy bars to protein bars among other things.

    BekaBooluvsu is right. Obviously, a drastic change does need to be made but steps at a time. Like she said, switch more unhealthful foods in your everyday diet to more healthful options.

    I would also recommend never eating after a certain time of night (eg, I stop eating at 8pm everyday) because any food in your stomach while youre sleeping will never be used for energy, so it's a waste.

    And drink SO much water. Go for 3L OF WATER a day. Nothing with caffeine or alcohol counts, but you should also stay away from excess cordials, milk, soft drinks, etc.

    Then work towards a big breakfast, and then progressively smaller meals throughout the day. This helps with the wasted calories you sleep on, as well as helping reduce night time bingeing.

    But you've joined here, and you've expressed a will to change, so as long as you stay strong it will work for you!! No doubt!

    Meal timing has no effect on weight loss. Please OP only restrict yourself in this manner if you find that it somehow works for you. Your body does not know what time it is. Excess calories eaten will get stored. The body will dip into its on stores if you're in a deficit. End of.
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
    I would say this ..for now, just eat the foods you like, but less of them and try to incorporate some healthier items. 'healthy' does not have to be bad ..tonight I had grilled chicken breast with some barbecue sauce on them and some brown rice with vegetables and it was good..you can also have steak, pork, ice cream, pizza, etc..

    Just eat in a deficit, and try not to restrict anything….as you start to lose weight you will learn how to incorporate healthier items...
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
    Hi

    I can only be honest with you because you have asked for help and there's no easy way to put it to you

    You need to stop eating out
    You need to eat less, a lot less
    You need to eat real fresh food
    You need to start with eating a decent breakfast
    You need to examine and deal with the reasons why you eat what you eat and how much you eat
    You do need to do something drastic
    You need to seek medical advice about how you might achieve all this in a healthy way

    actually, you can do none of this and lose weight..

    weight loss is about calorie deficit….eat less then you burn and you will lose weight...