Single Parents & Creative Exercise

a6ftdiva
a6ftdiva Posts: 88 Member
in Getting Started
I am a single mom and work full time. I am up at 6 every morning getting 3 kids ready and don't get home from work until 7 and then its homework, dinner and bedtime.

By the time I am done with bedtime its 10:30 and then laundry and cleaning until at least 12:30. Their father is unemployed, and lives in his car so he is unable to take them for any length of time. (I dont get any weeknights or weekends "off") The stress of that situation is killing me. (Long story but hes been out of work for 2 years and decided to be a full time student to evade child support) I have no extra money for babysitters and the local gym with babysitting is too expensive for me to afford. I work at a job where I cant leave for lunch most days and when I do its for business so I can't squeeze anything in durng the day.

I am so exhausted by the end of the day I usually fall asleep on the couch while I am folding laundry. I have been trying desperately to get up at 5 to squeeze in a workout but I find it nearly impossible to get out of bed and then the kids rooms are so close to the living room the noise of me doing a work out wakes them up and its all over.



To all the other single parents out there who have full time custody of several kids and no help:

How do you manage to get any quality exercise into your schedule? I need help so bad and I need to think outside the box so any suggestions would be great!

Replies

  • rockmama72
    rockmama72 Posts: 815 Member
    Awwwwwww honey. I really feel for you. :(

    I have not been in the exact situation, but I will say that laundry doesn't always get folded in my house, at least not by me. Each kid has their own basket. If they have to live out of the basket for a while, it's not the end of the world. And even a 5-year old can fold their own! Delegate, delegate. Can you clean on your days off and make the kids help? The last thing you need at the end of a long day is to clean--you need rest! A spotless house is not crucial.

    On busy days, a crock pot can be your best personal chef. Cheap cuts of meat + vegetables cook all day, so all you have to do is slap it on the table and call it dinner.

    For exercise: park far away from your destinations, take the stairs at work (go up and down a few times), walk on your lunch break, go to the park on weekends with your kids and don't just sit there and watch. I know people who do the bulk of their exercise on Saturday and Sunday; your kids can watch TV for an hour while you do a couple of videos. Put your oldest child in charge of the younger ones for a bit while you get it done.

    This can't be easy and must feel so overwhelming. I truly hope you find your groove.

    Edit to add: I just took a peek at your profile. Make those kids clean! :) And also, I forgot to mention Fitnessblender.com. They have tons of workouts that are 10 minutes or less. You can do a video while you supervise the dusting. :)
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,267 Member
    I was a single mom for 14 years, worked full time too...I kind of get it.

    When I decided to exercise it was during his homework time or his TV time.

    I chose workouts that were short and compact or I took him for a bike ride or he rode his bike while I walked fast to keep up...

    I prioritized it instead of laundry, cleaning etc. Our dinners during the week were quick but nutritious such as soups or crockpot meals...sometimes it was eggs and bacon etc.
  • jlynnm70
    jlynnm70 Posts: 460 Member
    I too looked at your profile - get those kids to help - especially the 14 year old (money is a great motivator - pay $10 a week to do certain chores or something) You could also probably get him/her to watch the kids for 30 min while you do something. Go for a walk, do a video, run the stairs to the basement 10 times.

    Even my 9 and 11 year old unload the dishwasher, run dust rags around, and vaccuum, clean bathrooms, etc. It may not be to my standards all the time, but it's better than not getting done at all - Once a month (on Saturday) I pick a room and clean it really good - that way what they miss gets caught up. Also My 9 and 11 year old know how to do laundry - well the 11 year old can do it alone, the 9 year old can sort and load the machine, but someone (me, my 18 year old or even his 11 year old sister go make sure he measured soap and softner correctly and put it in the right place - we once had soap in the softner dispenser!)

    use the Crock pot for dinners - it helps - and plan ahead - I find I do better if I plan things out in advance - or even precook on the weekends some.

    Also - You have to be able to take some sort of lunch by law - so go for a walk over lunch - I only get 30 minutes, but I pack something light and walk for about 15 minutes when the weather allows. (about a mile) I also take the stairs when I can (at the office no choice, but try taking 6 flights when I go to the courthouse! and no one realizes I was gone an extra 10-15 minutes - or cares!

    Every time you go to the bathroom do 30 jumping jacks and 10 push-ups off the counter - no one will realize your bathroom break took 2 extra minutes! Walk instead of sending an e-mail to ask a question - anything to get up. Sometimes I just take my chair away from my desk and stand while I am sorting paperwork, etc.

    Every little bit helps. Also - I don't know how you get along with your ex - some people do so better than others, but since he isn't paying child support - maybe he could come to your house and watch the kids for an hour a couple times a week at your place. (again this depends on how you can get along) I would be able to do this with my ex- but I know not everyone can.
  • a6ftdiva
    a6ftdiva Posts: 88 Member
    I moved into my house (bought by myself) during Xmas and have been having a hard time getting the kids to help. they are going through a hard time because their dad was living with us in the apartment until we moved. its been a big change for us all.

    My 14 year old does help a bunch (she does the laundry except folding and putting away, she does the dishes when I ask (the dishwasher is broken & I cant afford to fix it yet) my dryer is broken so it takes Hours for the loads to dry..which is why Im doing it every day round the clock! lol

    It seems like my ex is here all the time (he will watch them after school some days until I get home) which is a bad thing, because he plugs the kids into their ipods or the tv and then sits like a lump on the couch or takes his showers in my bathroom. He refuses to clean or have them clean during "daddy time" I hate having him around and any time I ask him to watch them longer he gives me *kitten* so it isnt worth it.

    It seems like weekends are the only time I have to get things done but there are so many plans and things that have to be done its so overwhelming. This weekend will be the first since moving that we dont have anything scheduled... i plan to use it as a boot camp for cleaning for the kids... we have been talking about it all week about how much each chore is worth (valued in ipod app credits) and we will sit together to make a chart for the little ones. I am hoping it will keep them motivated to help because I am at the end of my rope...

    So funny you mention push ups and jumping jacks in the bathroom!!! I have been doing that for a while now and get "caught" every so often which is so funny! I literally only go to the bathroom twice a day if I am lucky and I know I get lunch by law, but the boss is pretty easy on me when I am late which is most days (kids bus doesnt come until 8:24 and Im supposed to be here by 8;30... never happens so I feel obligated to make up the time at lunch..) . Im going to try to get out for a lunch walk at least 3 times each week even just 15 minutes..

    thanks for all the ideas and support!
  • jlynnm70
    jlynnm70 Posts: 460 Member
    Sounds like you are a little overwhelmed with the move and everything. That is something. (I'm not a single mom, but sometimes I feel like one, my husband does little to nothing around the house - with the exception of some cooking) so I get ya. He picks the kids up from school and basically sits in front of the TV the rest of the day. (Thank Goodness he finally got called back from a layoff and goes back tomorrow! YAY)

    That is good that you are going for walks a few times a week and the other things I already said.

    Maybe try to find a way to motivate the kids while their dad is there to get stuff done. (bribery - if your homework is done when I get home from work every day this week, then on Saturday you can _________________) Works for my kids and now they just have it done when I get home. So it is one less thing to do and it usually is something as simple as a promise of a bike ride or to the library to get it done).

    Also the chart is a great idea. Anything they do, is something you don't have to. That helps A LOT!

    The last thing I finally did - was signed up at Planet Fitness - I stop on my way home. 20 min on an elliptical and 20 minutes worth of weight machines (not many free weights, But I'll learn) It's only $10 so if I don't go a lot - I won't fee guilty, but I plan on stopping 3 times a week - that extra 45 minutes has made all the difference to me. I feel like I am accomplishing something and dinner is only delayed a little bit from our normal time. (And you ex would already be at the house to watch the kids)

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