Hopeless and Looking Hope and Support

ohioiggys
ohioiggys Posts: 1 Member
in Introduce Yourself
I have been on a rollercoaster with my weight since I was a toddler. My parents put me on my first diet by the time I was five years old. Being raised in a big fat divide- my dad was super fit and athletic, as were my two older sisters, whereas my mom and I were plump, sedentary, and forever searching for a way to be like the rest of the family- was painful, confusing, and never allowed me to love or accept myself exactly as I was. Instead, I have always been on a quest to be someone I felt I was supposed to be. Being a girl, I was teased mercilessly for my weight. I learned to hate myself from a very young age. Family members were cruel, thinking "tough love" was just the thing I needed to shed the fat. I was 170lbs by the time I was in 5th grade, lost weight here and there and landed at 190 when I graduated high school. Ballooned to 240 in college, then blew up to my highest weight of 324.4 after years of dealing with fibromyalgia, lower back issues after a car accident, and the death of my father to cancer at 54 years old. I've been up and down and all around, but after the joyful birth of my daughter three years ago, I haven't been able to get below 300. I've lost all hope and motivation. I've been searching for that spark that would reignite my desire to lose weight, but it just feels hopeless! Why do I feel like this? Has anyone else been stuck in a rut like this? Is it a rut, or is this the way it will always be? Why can't i get my actions to align with my desires?!?! Some days I get so frustrated with myself and wonder why the heck I can't get it together!!

An acquaintance recommended that I try MFP to immerse myself in a positive, inspiring community of people with similar experiences and desires, and I would be so grateful to leverage others inspiring stories and optimism to reignite the spark and get me on the right track once and for all.

Replies

  • gkalmbach
    gkalmbach Posts: 28 Member
    I can't say I've ever been in a rut this this.. but I can tell you that you have come to the right place. The people on here are very supportive, fun, motivational, and some of them are quite knowledgeable.

    I don't think it always has to be this way. You can change things. You made the first step by getting on here. Get some friends on here for a nice group of supporters.

    Feel free to add me (can't turn down a fellow Buckeye!)
  • xxghost
    xxghost Posts: 4,697 Member
    Hi there, and welcome to MFP!

    First off, it will not always be like this. I promise you. I'm sure we've all felt that way at some point in our lives - hopeless, discouraged, down on ourselves, or disgusted with our bodies. That's what brought us to MFP in the first place!

    I'm sorry that you've been through so much already. I know the feeling. Even when family members make comments like "maybe you should start watching what you eat" with the best intentions, it can sound cruel and judgmental. I've been there. I've lost a lot of weight, gained it all back, rinse and repeat. Its hard. But I've found that MFP really helps.

    Once you get into the swing of things, you'll start to feel better about yourself. Even before you lose those first pounds, you'll feel stronger. Less food, and maybe better food (depending on what changes you'd like to make), will start to feel natural, and make your body feel better too. You'll be blown away by how much easier it is to walk or run. You'll find climbing steps less challenging, and you won't be breathless at the top. Your clothes will fit better, and you'll actually look forward to shopping. You'll feel accomplished, and the support and love from your MFP friends will help you keep going. All of that has nothing to do with the scale!

    Starting is really tough. You have to believe that you can do it. Once you get past that mental block, I think you'll be able to do great things! The MFP community will help you with that. Just forget what has happened in the past, and how cruel people have been to you. Sit down, and figure out your goals. I hope "feel happy in my own skin" is right up near the top. Then go for it! This rut is temporary. So many of us have overcome it, and I'm confident that you can too!
  • martinel2099
    martinel2099 Posts: 899 Member
    first of all you're not hopeless, nobody is. I highly recommend viewing this post by Vismal, he was a guy that was over 300 and obese to fitness guru. Calorie counting is the only real way to lose weight and it's not as unforgiving as the super extreme fad diets you are hearing about. You can eat the foods you love but just need to watch the numbers and make smarter choices.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1296011-calorie-counting-101

    I'm a pretty big guy myself but by starting to count calories I've found this to be the easiest and most realistic way to lose weight and keep it off for life. I'm 248lbs now down from 260 and I plan to keep calorie counting the rest of my life. I can't just eat what ever I want like some of the skinny people I know, but most importantly after I lose the weight I want to bulk up and build muscle, which also requires calorie counting.

    You can do it.
  • skippygirlsmom
    skippygirlsmom Posts: 4,433 Member
    Welcome to MFP.

    Read this post - it has so much great information.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants
  • gobraves47
    gobraves47 Posts: 213 Member
    MFP is a great resource--there are some awesome people here. Good luck--you CAN do this!
  • lizziebeth1028
    lizziebeth1028 Posts: 3,602 Member
    I have been on a rollercoaster with my weight since I was a toddler. My parents put me on my first diet by the time I was five years old. Being raised in a big fat divide- my dad was super fit and athletic, as were my two older sisters, whereas my mom and I were plump, sedentary, and forever searching for a way to be like the rest of the family- was painful, confusing, and never allowed me to love or accept myself exactly as I was. Instead, I have always been on a quest to be someone I felt I was supposed to be. Being a girl, I was teased mercilessly for my weight. I learned to hate myself from a very young age. Family members were cruel, thinking "tough love" was just the thing I needed to shed the fat. I was 170lbs by the time I was in 5th grade, lost weight here and there and landed at 190 when I graduated high school. Ballooned to 240 in college, then blew up to my highest weight of 324.4 after years of dealing with fibromyalgia, lower back issues after a car accident, and the death of my father to cancer at 54 years old. I've been up and down and all around, but after the joyful birth of my daughter three years ago, I haven't been able to get below 300. I've lost all hope and motivation. I've been searching for that spark that would reignite my desire to lose weight, but it just feels hopeless! Why do I feel like this? Has anyone else been stuck in a rut like this? Is it a rut, or is this the way it will always be? Why can't i get my actions to align with my desires?!?! Some days I get so frustrated with myself and wonder why the heck I can't get it together!!

    An acquaintance recommended that I try MFP to immerse myself in a positive, inspiring community of people with similar experiences and desires, and I would be so grateful to leverage others inspiring stories and optimism to reignite the spark and get me on the right track once and for all.

    Welcome and best wishes!!! MFP is a great source of motivation and inspiration! I love browsing the success story boards. There are so many people on here have made amazing transformations. It can be done!! The best advice I can give you is - don't look at this as a diet. It's a lifestyle change. This means enjoying foods that you love in moderation. Pick a sensible calorie goal (above 1200, but below 2000), stick to that goal, log every single bite, eat healthy but allow for small treats, MODERATION is the key!!
  • rsclause
    rsclause Posts: 3,103 Member
    I always knew I should lose some weight but never really applied myself. I always thought I could eat what I wanted and would try to exercise to lose and would make some progress but it alway was short lived. I started exercising mildly and eating a little better. Then I got a fitbit tracker, Aria Wi-Fi scale and found this site. Thats when it all came together for me. Its not a diet, its a lifestyle change and it does work. You're in it to win it!
  • adipace815
    adipace815 Posts: 112 Member
    You can do this! You just have to remember that no matter how hard it gets. You will find a lot of great people here on MFP that have been through or are going through the same thing as you are. There have been a lot of people here in MFP that have helped me. Feel free to add me. I will help anyway that I can. You can do this!

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