I need a kick in the pants

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Last year I lost 40 lbs. I worked out 4 times a week and felt REALLY good about myself. Then things started to go down hill. In Nov. I quit my job, had the birthday blues, got the flu, and my dog died....crap, right? I've managed to gain back 20 lbs and haven't been to the gym in months. But, I'm smart enough to look at these things and say, EXCUSES!! What I'm not smart enough to do (for some stupid reason) is to get off my *kitten* and change the behavior.

I feel so angry and disappointed in myself for allowing this to happen. I know I should just wipe the slate clean and just put in the work...and yet, I feel like I'm not ready, like I want to wallow in self pity. But, holy crap I gotta do something!!! So, I'm hoping for some wise words and maybe a new way of seeing things?

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  • DoctahJenn
    DoctahJenn Posts: 616 Member
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    Baby steps! Start by just trying to eat right. Calculate your BMR and aim for that. Want more food? Mix in some easy (for you) exercises. Just don't try to jump in head first or you're going to get overwhelmed. :) And remember - you have a ton of new Whovian friends to help motivate you! They're all fan-TAS-tic at motivation! ;)
  • mjones1029
    mjones1029 Posts: 14 Member
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    I understand. I am in the same boat. I am now embarking on re losing the 25 pounds I lost 2 years ago. I am so angry with myself. I am now determined to use this site for accountability and support. I would love to have accountability partners. We can connect through the community> I am new to community types of things. Michele
  • itsbiggerontheinside
    itsbiggerontheinside Posts: 7 Member
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    I have started walking/running with our new cocker spaniel pup...River. :wink:
  • VCopple
    VCopple Posts: 56 Member
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    I agree with baby steps. However, I also know that there is a biological reason for the blues when you don't work out. The dopamine levels in your brain drop. The feel good endorphins you get from sex and chocolate is the same one. So when we eat sugar we get that dopamine high. We also get it with increased exercise.

    Start with small things like parking in the first spot you see instead of the closest spot. Take the stairs. Do a lap around the block after dinner to help digest your food. Drink more water. Once you increase your exercise again, your endorphin leveles will rise and you'll start to feel better. :smile:
  • zulaskinny
    zulaskinny Posts: 6 Member
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    I feel the same way. I lost a few kg a few months ago, I achieved my goal weight and then I stopped working out so much, I started eating more sweets (I've moved out form my parents and I guess it's just a way to say I love you :/) and I've gained almost everything I've lost and it's sad BUT I decided to do something about it! In the end, it is always up to you to decide what to do in your free time and what to eat

    I've started thinking how good it was to see my dream body, to feel that I did it. I've been fighting with myself for a couple of weeks and I made a decision: less sweets, more good food. I also created a new work-out plan, I'm going to print it, put it on a wall and try to do what I've planned.

    Hope that helps at least a bit :)
  • Pinkahlicious
    Pinkahlicious Posts: 18 Member
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    I did the same thing. Remember what you did last time to lose the weight and do it again. That's what I tell myself anyways...I've started again and doing well, so far. I am trying hard to stay on track. GOOD LUCK!!!
  • Macstraw
    Macstraw Posts: 896 Member
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    You're dealing with a lot of things that have happened in a short period of time. It seems to me that you're stressing yourself by making this much bigger than it needs to be. Don't look at having gained 20 pounds, don't look at not having been to the gym in months, don't look at your final goal right now. Look at 1 simple thing - getting up tomorrow & just dealing with tomorrow, eat just a little better & do some exercise to get moving (even if it's a short walk). Do the same thing the next day, maybe another small, healthier change to the eating & upping the exercise a little bit. Do the same thing the next day & the next & the next. By the time you realize it, you will have taken some good strides toward getting back to where you want to be. You know from before that as you get healthier you will feel better & feel like doing more. I keep writing all over the place (just as much to keep reminding myself) that we didn't get where we are now overnight, nor will we get to where we want to be overnight. It's a marathon, not a sprint & consistent growth is the way to make the permanent changes we need to stay healthy. One day at a time........
  • emaybe
    emaybe Posts: 187 Member
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    I did the same thing. Dropped ~30, gained it all back over a divorce and move and complete life change.

    I'm getting back in the swing and I think I'm doing pretty well... I started by focusing on being more active, not freaking out about hitting the gym. I do crunches and push ups in the morning before I do anything... Sure it's a 5 minute exercise routine but it does act as a mental reset button for the day, at least for me.

    Having a new pup is also good motivation, I realized this with my own dog... He's an active breed so I try to make sure to take him on long walks on days I'm feeling particularly lazy by guilting myself into thinking I'm a bad dog owner (we have a big yard so walks are not always necessary).

    If you go to see live music, make sure to dance. If you have to run to the store, walk or bike instead of driving. Little changes will lead to an overall more active lifestyle that will help you feel more motivated. :)
  • ChaplainHeavin
    ChaplainHeavin Posts: 426 Member
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    I have learned to forgive myself but not to excuse myself. Kicking myself merely adds insult to injury. Making excuses gives me permission not to change.
  • kacvt67
    kacvt67 Posts: 2
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    I had on ly 30 pounds to go a few years ago with a starting goal of 80! 50 lbs lost was a BIG deal!!!! I gained it all back and then some in just 6 months after maintaining for a year. I get it. I had family issues, financial issues, also lost a beloved pet and had started searching for a new job.
    I am back on track, having lost 6 of what is no a 100 lb goal. I woke up - kind of like you did - and said WHAT DID I DO!??? It wasn't all you. NO ONE can be strong all the time. NO ONE is able to shoulder loss, life, work, family, hopes and dreams and keep them balanced ALL the time.
    Cut yourself a break. It happened. It can change. It did before.
    Ask yourself what you LOVE to eat, LOVE to do to exercise, LOVE in life and do it all! Eat foods you love that are healthy, in moderation, with JOY! Exercise like you are the only one able to achieve such great strenght, speed, flexibility, whatever you love. THEN - GET OUT! Find a place to sit, enjoy, dance, grab a coffee, read a book, hold hands with someone you love. Watch the raindrops make patterns on the window if that brings you joy!
    LIVE! Life is not about weight, but about health. You need to take care of what you can, no pressure, no limits. Just enjoy life. When I do - and it is not often, my fault, my issues - I feel like I am in high school again. I have a spring in my step. I have no weight issues. Grey hair? who me? Nah, that's just dust! I also find I live well in those moments. I look to string them together and make them an hour, a day - one to remember with JOY!
    How's that for a kick in the pants? Now, go drink that water, take a couple of hops and skips around the house and laugh.
  • Apocalypz
    Apocalypz Posts: 155 Member
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    Have a friend hold you accountable. If you're used to going to the gym, then I'd bet you don't even need baby steps. Find a reliable friend or two or three who regularly go to the gym and tell them that you need their help to hold you accountable. Tell them not to take any whiny excuses, pathetic rationalisation or too-busy-ness. Threats sometimes work.
  • itsbiggerontheinside
    itsbiggerontheinside Posts: 7 Member
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    Thank you all for sharing your stories and giving me a little perspective. It's appreciated, truly.