Is it bad that I haven't really gone on a date??

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Haiyaku
Haiyaku Posts: 26
in Chit-Chat
I used to be in a relationship but I didn't really get the chance to go out dating?
But dispite that, how do you even get a date? I'm not even sure how this happens with other people??
Is it just my appearance???
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Replies

  • Haiyaku
    Haiyaku Posts: 26
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    I'd really like to know what it is that makes someone "dateable"

    :(
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
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    I've never been on a date, either.
    Edit: And it's not about the whole "dateable" thing, just been in long term relationships, is all.
  • embrace_the_dark_side
    embrace_the_dark_side Posts: 236
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    Dates are good ways to feel out people you don't really know romantically... if you've already got a handle on that stuff then dates are just formalities and as with all formalities, they only matter as much as you let them
  • embrace_the_dark_side
    embrace_the_dark_side Posts: 236
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    I've never been on a date, either.
    Edit: And it's not about the whole "dateable" thing, just been in long term relationships, is all.

    Youre probably the WORST in public
  • sweetcurlz67
    sweetcurlz67 Posts: 1,168 Member
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    It's not all it's cracked up to be. You just have to put yourself out there. You'll date a lot of, eh hem, not up to par guys, but then maybe you'll run across a nice one once in a while. I'm kinda taking a break. There's one guy I am maybe kinda sorta sometimes seeing every once in a blue moon. He's the only nice one I've met. All others have been after 'something' from me. Just take a chance, you're beautiful, that shouldn't be an issue for you.
  • Haiyaku
    Haiyaku Posts: 26
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    I just don't want to meet any guy s who are too, uh...active downstairs and I dont tend to get with
    people who I haven't met because I guess I'm just too paranoid D: how do you tell a genuine guy
    from a guy who wants nothing but selfish needs? :(
    And thank you for the compliment by the way :3 it's cheered my mood up a bit
  • sweetcurlz67
    sweetcurlz67 Posts: 1,168 Member
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    This one guy that I mentioned... Well, we met through a dating service. However, he also tried to previously contact me via an online dating site. He is super nice and so far a true gentleman. He's given me brief hugs but that's it so far, AND he asked permission first!!! He asks if he can walk me to my car after our dates, he's just super nice. The other guys were like all over me almost right away if not immediately. This guy is a welcome change.

    As far as how do you meet them? Unfortunately, you have to put yourself out there. He's mixed up with the "active" guys. You know your limits, so just say no. It's scary, yes. I'm out here after being off the market for 24+years!!! But I'm doing it. Good luck!!! :flowerforyou:
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
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    I have only done it a few times.
  • darkguardian419
    darkguardian419 Posts: 1,302 Member
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    Sounds like you'd rather go fishing. :wink: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
  • baba_helly
    baba_helly Posts: 810 Member
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    Just hang out here. This thread is a good start.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
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    Just hang out here. This thread is a good start.
    :laugh:
  • salembambi
    salembambi Posts: 5,592 Member
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    someone asks you on a date or you ask them is usually how it happens
    put yourself out there.. the bar, online dating and such
  • Onderwoman
    Onderwoman Posts: 130
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    Dating sucks. Sometimes I envied India's arranged marriages. Its not really male chauvinist institution either if you escape India, I see plenty of Indian couples around here and the female is definitely the boss.
  • vjohn04
    vjohn04 Posts: 2,276 Member
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    interesting thread.
  • JamieJam1102
    JamieJam1102 Posts: 308 Member
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    No it isn't bad, but I think that we've gotten to a point in society where traditional date/date offers don't happen as much anymore. Everything is centered around social media... so... its like someone else said - maybe put yourself out there more.... try online dating... something like that. Dating's hard no matter what the medium... just gotta truck it out. Well... if you want to, that is. :drinker:
  • robertdc50
    robertdc50 Posts: 50
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    Didn't your "relationship" start off by dating? Dating doesn't have to be a formal, I'll pick you up at 7 kinda thing. Sharing a grocery cart or meeting at the park for an afternoon of walking and talking can be dates! Whatever 2 people of the opposite gender have in common can usually be shared, and by doing so you're dating. What else would you call it?
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,932 Member
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    My go tos are a white panel van, zip ties, and a big burlap sack. You might want to try that.
  • Mia_RagazzaTosta
    Mia_RagazzaTosta Posts: 4,885 Member
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    My go tos are a white panel van, zip ties, and a big burlap sack. You might want to try that.

    If you have Sweettarts or salted caramel chocolates, the last two things are unnecessary (for me)
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,932 Member
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    My go tos are a white panel van, zip ties, and a big burlap sack. You might want to try that.

    If you have Sweettarts or salted caramel chocolates, the last two things are unnecessary (for me)

    I always have candy. And ice cream. Just right back here in the back, down these stairs, and in the back over here, just a little further. . .
  • boontarkas
    boontarkas Posts: 11
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    Confidence is key. The crux of that is self-esteem. Self-esteem and confidence make us desirable. Feeling good about yourself will add to both attributes. We get in good shape and we'll end up feeling better about ourselves.

    There's no harm in not dating all the time. You can be a sparkler: shiny, bright, fairly common,but short-lived, or you can be an M90 -not as common, huge bang for the buck, memorable, and if your not careful will take your hand off. Maybe your just an M90. Dont fret it.

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