Losing weight for nothing!!

So everyone, and I mean everyone that I personally know that has lost weight has gained it back. I just don't get it! I have been struggling to lose weight (well, stick to a weight loss plan) for many, many years and I have to be honest, I'm terrified of losing the weight just to gain it back! Why do people allow themselves to gain the weight back? Or is it harder to maintain a weight loss? I just don't want to be one of those ones who loses weight then gains it all back and feels hopeless all over again. How do we truly keep the weight we lose off? Thanks in advance!
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Replies

  • ravenmiss
    ravenmiss Posts: 384 Member
    I lost weight the first time around via WW, I was often hungry, I never did any exercise and I had an active lifestyle.

    Not too long after they changed the plan so it was near impossible to follow for me personally. I went through a lot of stress, my dad passed away, I got divorced and many other things were going on. Working out how to maintain was the last thing on my mind, then I met someone new, was uber happy, my lifestyle changed from an active one to a very inactive one and I had a way larger income too (more meals out, more takeaways, more wine etc).

    Then I realised not only had I gained the weight back but extra and I wasn't happy so here I am doing it the RIGHT way for me that will lead me being able to maintain it easily even if life throws cr*p at me again.

    Many people will look for quick fixes and "diets" to lose weight then once they have lost it, they think they can go back to how they were and then pile it back on.
  • 051214
    051214 Posts: 5
    I guess I'm looking for tips on how to lose weight for the long haul
  • MeganAnne89
    MeganAnne89 Posts: 271 Member
    I think that the best advise that I can give is that in order to succeed for life, you have to come up with a dietary plan that works for you. People often gain pounds back when they've restricted a portion of their diet, and then once they hit their goal weight, they immediately start eating all of those foods again that made them overweight in the first place.

    When people think of the word "diet" they often think that it always means that you're never eating a certain group of foods. However, when it comes to my diet, that pretty much means that I try my best to eat healthy but if I want to eat some candy on a Friday while watching a movie, then I'm gonna ****ing do it. But that's just me. That's how I keep myself in check - I need a balance in my life. I don't enjoy it if I also can't enjoy my food and I won't allow myself to feel guilty just because I went over 1300 calories in one day. That's no fun.

    Side note - when I started on MFP I only weighed 127. That was in January and just by watching my portion sizes, I've lost 7-8 pounds in four months. I've eaten whatever I've wanted because I understand that this is how I have to do this. This is what works for me.
  • 051214
    051214 Posts: 5
    I lost weight the first time around via WW, I was often hungry, I never did any exercise and I had an active lifestyle.

    Not too long after they changed the plan so it was near impossible to follow for me personally. I went through a lot of stress, my dad passed away, I got divorced and many other things were going on. Working out how to maintain was the last thing on my mind, then I met someone new, was uber happy, my lifestyle changed to an active one to a very inactive one and I had a way larger income too (more meals out, more takeaways, more wine etc).

    Then I realised not only had I gained the weight back but extra and I wasn't happy so here I am doing it the RIGHT way for me that will lead me being able to maintain it easily even if life throws cr*p at me again.

    Many people will look for quick fixes and "diets" to lose weight then once they have lost it, they think they can go back to how they were and then pile it back on.

    Thanks for your reply. I am glad you are doing it for you and for the right reasons. I do think that for me having something to look forward to will help me to lose weight and keep it off. Like a goal to want to reach. It's just the motivation part and being able to stay on track part.
  • ZombieEarhart
    ZombieEarhart Posts: 320 Member
    Be different. Don't diet, eat in a way that you can enjoy for the rest of your life.
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  • DeterminedFee201426
    DeterminedFee201426 Posts: 859 Member
    i think the best way to keep it off is to always stay at a bit of a deficit but not as high as when you were trying to lose the weight or loseing weight
  • 051214
    051214 Posts: 5
    People gain it back for the same reasons they had it in the first place.

    Food is tasty, exercise is hard.

    People will put a lot more thought/excuses into it. Something came up, they were depressed, winter was cold, didn't have the time, yada yada yada...

    I lost a lot of weight, I was very happy with myself. I was so happy and proud that I started to slack off and promptly regained 20lbs. "Bulking" my *kitten*.

    Point is it happens. The question is if you let it get worse or you do something about it. Same as when you start losing to begin with.

    I really like your response, thank you!
  • TopazCutie
    TopazCutie Posts: 386 Member
    I know people have heard this a MILLION times, but it has to be a lifestyle change!!!!
  • 051214
    051214 Posts: 5
    Be different. Don't diet, eat in a way that you can enjoy for the rest of your life.

    You are right! Great advice
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
    It depends on the person but I'll tell you what's worked for me this time:

    First of all, I'm not on a "diet". I'm not restricting any foods, rather limiting the amount of the foods I eat, finding healthy alternatives and/or indulging less often. For instance, I'll still have pizza but instead of eating half a large loaded, I'll have 3 or 4 slices of a medium with veggies on a thinner crust. And I try to restrict pizza night to once every couple weeks. Handling weight loss this way has made it easier to do long term. Whereas I used to cut out most/all of the foods I liked and then a few months later I'd get sick of all the cravings and quit.

    Second, I found exercises that I enjoy so that I'll stick with them. Sort of the same idea as not depriving myself of food because I'm not feeling like I'm forcing myself to do something just to lose weight. There are a million things you read that you "should" do but if you don't enjoy them, at some point you'll stop or at least be less consistent. To me it's better to do something consistently than nothing at all. For instance, I've severely decreased my strength training lately because the weather is perfect for walking/running and I'd rather be outside enjoying the day. I'll get back to weights again when it gets too hot out.

    Third, I'm losing for a better reason. In the past, I tried to lose weight to please other people or to get trimmer for a certain event like being in a wedding or going to a reuinion or vacations. This never worked long term because once that event came and went, I just went back to my old bad habits. This time I'm doing it for my health and fitness which is a life long goal.

    Good luck!
  • jldahlen21
    jldahlen21 Posts: 18
    I gained back the weight and don't care for myself the way I should as a result of me really searching and discovering I just wanted some one to care for me.... I could go on but won't bore you... I think it's really a mental thing to figure out. Add me if you'd like to talk more.
  • jtyler83
    jtyler83 Posts: 28 Member
    do it for vanity. once you start liking the mirror you'll never want to go back
  • maab_connor
    maab_connor Posts: 3,927 Member
    i think that too many of us see a finish line and think we'll be done there. when that's not at all how it works. it's a lifelong change (when done right) and not something you're going to win a gold star for.
  • missomgitsica
    missomgitsica Posts: 496 Member
    I think most people who gain it all back lost weight with a fad diet or a crash diet. I mean, if you only eat 500 calories a day sure you'll lose weight, but that's completely unsustainable. I think the best advice as far as keeping it off is making small changes that you can do for a long time, if that makes sense.
  • gravalis
    gravalis Posts: 1 Member
    When I decided it was time to confront the extra pounds, I spent some time trying to decide the right way. I went to several weight loss clinics, met with my Doctor, read books and then made my decision about how to go about it. While the clinics were tempting because they promised quick results, I knew that it would not be something I could maintain. I decided what I needed was not a diet but a lifestyle change. The shift in mindset is key because it suggests that this is not something that you do for a period of time but that you do forever. If you revert to your old habits, common sense says you will revert to your same size as well. The readings I have done and am continuing to do has been very helpful to educate me on best practices, such as eating 6 mini meals a day to keep your metabolism constantly revved up and to eat a mixture of protein, carbs and fat at each meal. I have lost 32lbs and am about halfway to my goal. Body For Life is a great book if you'd like to read more about some of the principles I've mentioned here. Good luck! You can do it!
  • ErinMcMom
    ErinMcMom Posts: 228 Member
    I lost a pretty good chunk of weight on MFP last year around this time (Eating just 1200 per day, not eating back exercise calories, because I didn't visit these forums, so I didn't know any better. Got down to 140 lbs) but gained it all back and then some.

    Why? Because I'm an IDIOT.

    I got to my goal weight, but never entered these forums even a single time. I didn't know anything about "switching to maintenance calories" so I just started eating whatever I wanted, as much as I wanted. I even continued to lose weight that way for a short time and thought to myself, "wow, I'm still losing, why did I bother dieting". Now, the loss didn't continue forever, and as life got increasingly hectic the big portions continued until I'd arrived right back where I started.

    The big problem for me was that I was uninformed, and also I was thinking of MFP as a "diet" which implies limiting yourself and also implies that it ends at some point. That's not how I think of MFP anymore. MFP isn't a diet, it's a lifelong change that will help me to hold onto all the hard won progress I've made. It doesn't end when I reach goal weight, it just changes a little.
    I'm never gaining this weight back again!
  • bellevie86
    bellevie86 Posts: 301 Member
    Lots of people, not ALL people will gain weight back. It's because we often get lazy, and by lazy I don't mean not moving. I mean we get lazy with our nutrition and too lax with food choices. We tend to get comfortable and really enjoy being thinner, example: going out more often.

    I find the best way to maintain is to keep a lot of the same habits. Like being mindful of food choices. Also continuing to educate myself as well as finding a sustainable exercise routine, like walking 3-4 times a week.

    This is what I've learned I will HAVE to do, because I have teeter-tottered but have never gained back the full first 35 pounds I lost. Maintenance is a switch but the only way we can maintain is to keep some of the behaviours we learned from losing in the first place :)
  • Mom_of_X
    Mom_of_X Posts: 85 Member
    i think keeping it fresh went a long way for me - when the same old routine got boring, i found something new to engage in: new exercises, new fitness goals, new food adventures (pescatarian, vegetarian, ethnic exploration, etc.). i hit my ideal weight in 2006. even after having a baby, i knew enough about the process and myself to understand how to get rid of the extra weight in a healthy, sustainable way, and go back to where i was.

    good luck!
  • Morgaath
    Morgaath Posts: 679 Member
    I am watching what I eat...not dieting.
    I didn't try to lose 2lbs a week for every single lb. I worked from 2lbs per week when I was rated as obese, and then kept cutting down my deficit the closer I got to my goal weight. This teaches me how much I can eat, so when I am at goal, I am already pretty much eating as I need to to stay that weight.
    And if I notice I am gaining fat, I'll cut back a bit, or try and be a bit more active, till I like what I see in the mirror again.
  • Shaky44
    Shaky44 Posts: 214 Member
    Getting to an ideal weight is a milestone, but it's not the end. Maintenance is as difficult as losing. I personally know of no one who has continued to log food during maintenance who has gained it all back.
  • lavaughan69
    lavaughan69 Posts: 459 Member
    People gain it back for the same reasons they had it in the first place.

    Food is tasty, exercise is hard.

    People will put a lot more thought/excuses into it. Something came up, they were depressed, winter was cold, didn't have the time, yada yada yada...

    I lost a lot of weight, I was very happy with myself. I was so happy and proud that I started to slack off and promptly regained 20lbs. "Bulking" my *kitten*.

    Point is it happens. The question is if you let it get worse or you do something about it. Same as when you start losing to begin with.

    Absolutely all of this!

    Another thing that seems to happen after you lose weight is a period of time that goes by where you seem to be able to eat what you want without gaining weight. I think what's really happening is your quantities just slowly creep up. You stop weighing yourself because you think you look the same. Then your pants start getting a little tight and you switch to stretchy material which gives you a false sense of security for at least 20lbs ;-)

    I've gained and lost weight countless times and ultimately it's because I stop tracking and weighing.
  • sassyjae21
    sassyjae21 Posts: 1,217 Member
    People stop paying attention.
  • RWTBR
    RWTBR Posts: 140 Member
    They gain the weight back just like addicts relapse. They believe diet and exercise is only for fatties and that thin people don't have to do those things. So they lose the weight and then say "I'm fine now, I can eat like a pig and never work out!" Then they gain it back.

    To avoid the yo-yo cycle, you need to view these efforts as permanent lifestyle changes. And you need to enjoy healthy eating and exercise.
  • bravid98
    bravid98 Posts: 80 Member
    People keep asking me what "diet" I'm on... I respond by telling them I'm not on a diet per se, I've changed my lifestyle.

    I eat healthy foods in appropriate portion sizes and exercise everyday, period. My mindset has always been to make sustainable changes in my life, otherwise I will just gain it all back.

    If I have a craving for a specific food I'll find a way to either substitute an equally tasty healthy option or else work the actual food into my days calorie needs.
  • stephe1987
    stephe1987 Posts: 406 Member
    Create habits you can maintain for the rest of your life. Don't "diet" by eating only "healthy" foods and never allowing yourself to eat the things you enjoy. Follow the 80/20 rule. Get regular exercise. Maybe the weight won't come off as quickly as some of those crazy diets where they eat next to nothing and exercise six hours a day, but you will not gain it back because you will not go off the new routine. Unlike the crazy diets that only last until they reach their goal, and then of course they put the weight back on because they went back to their old habits of eating a ton of calories and not exercising.
  • oxers
    oxers Posts: 259 Member
    The amount of time it takes to lose it plays a pretty big part as well, actually. Most studies correlate people who took their sweet time taking it off gradually with those that manage to keep it off. The key (I _think_, time will tell) is to make small, gradual changes you can live with, and to give your body time to adjust. Hormone levels change, and depending on how quickly you lose, hunger indicators may not. That's a huge factor right there.

    Most people get SUPER motivated and lose a ton of weight in a pretty narrow time frame, and that's the big eye-popping change, for sure, but it's not manageable long-term. You'll also want to consider your own body composition. I'm an endomorph, for example, on the tall side, and I've always been lean and heavier than other girls, even when I was doing ballet semi-professionally as a teenager. I'll never be a waif, and trying to get down there isn't healthy for me - my body is more likely to freak out and I'm way more likely to put it all back on.

    I guess shoot for personal health, is what I'm saying. Find what's right for you. You don't have to be the cross-fit girl in the center of the gym or the hipster waif in the mall. Find your healthy spot, take it slow, be good to yourself, and don't freak out if you slip a little. Keeping the big picture in mind helps a lot, I think.
  • TheVirgoddess
    TheVirgoddess Posts: 4,535 Member
    I know people have heard this a MILLION times, but it has to be a lifestyle change!!!!

    This times 100. I'm not dieting. I'm changing the way I view nutrition, physical activity and how I treat my body. It's not a destination (to a certain weight), it's a journey (to healthier life).

    Gosh I'm corny.
  • runcrissierun
    runcrissierun Posts: 37 Member
    take into consideration HOW they lose it before worrying if it will happen to you. Did they have a "diet" mentality and then go back to their old habits? Did they do a silly quick fix program that isn't healthy and sustainable (ie - Atkins?). Did they drop too much weight too fast? Was healthy eating and healthy exercise built in for the long term?

    You will be successful and it will last - because you will do it in a healthy way with a great community!