Been chubby forever. What is my life?

daross16 · April 2013

So I'm turning 19 in two months. Ever since I was little, I've been chubby or overweight or whatever. My parents took good care of me and we always went on bike rides and threw the frisbee around or did something to keep me running around. My mom always made me finish my corn before I could have a brownie (god, I hate corn...) and she did her best to keep my meals balanced (even if I did sneak a few cookies when she wasn't looking..hah).
But I've always been flubbery!
I think the most traumatizing experience for me for being a chubby kid, because before I was not aware of my chubbyness, was when the pediatrician suggested my mom take me to this short health class for kids and parents about being overweight and how to manage it. The person teaching the class had a big chunk of fake fat and was talking about, "Oh this is a pound of fat, this is inside of you. Gross, isn't it? Blah blahh blah." And was talking about exercising and eating right. I give shiznat about the rest of what she was saying I was just like, "Oh my god I'm here because I'm fat." That was like...first grade I think. I didn't think about it much afterwards, but sometimes that memory would keep coming back to me and make me feel bad.
I think the skinniest I was ever was in 3rd grade when I had an infection in my stomach and I couldn't eat any gluten, sugars, carbs, yeast...Everything had to be natural and. Oh wow, do I hate whole wheat bread. It sucked so bad being in 3rd grade and halloween and Valentines went by...

Anyways, was a really cute look for me (I was freaking adorable) until aboooutt....6th grade when kids get really mean and start to judge and make fun of you. I never was severely overweight or anything, I just wasn't as skinny as the other kids. And lemme tell you, being chubby and the only black kid in your class is not easy. But despite all the soccer I would play or how much I rode around on my bike or scooter with my friends, I could never lose weight. Never ever. I could drop maybe five pounds, but I saw other kids I've always known go from overweight to super duper fit over summer. WTF. What is wrong with me?

I know it's not a thyroid problem. I got that tested already.
Has anyone else had this problem? You've been overweight your whole life and it just seems like nothing will work? Has this been you and you DID find something that worked?

peopletalk · April 2013

i have been chubby my whole life. i was at my heaviest about 3 months ago (not anymore

)
the only time i was thin was a short year in grade 11 when i only ate about 400 calories a day. i was at 140 lbs and i'm 5'6
i'm now 193, but i started at 209

i was teased about my weight all my life. from grade 3 up until now!

trust me, this is the longest i've ever stayed committed to a diet (lifestyle change)
if i can make it even this far, you can too. i just decided it was now or never for me.
good luck! feel free to add me if you want.

LoraF83 · April 2013

I'm a good decade older than you, but I remember always feeling chubby and different from other kids. And I was a pretty active kid too. I hated being a fat bride, a fat mom. I was embarrased that I couldn't keep up with my toddler and embarrassed for my husband to have to be seen with me. The older I got, the more "reasons" I had to explain why I couldn't lose weight. I had a steroid shot as a child. I had messed up hormones. I was too busy to eat right. Etc. Etc. Etc.

The truth was, I was eating more food than I needed and not moving enough. It sucks to realize it was something that simple, something I could have controlled the whole time. But it's the truth. As soon as I started eating less and moving more, I lost weight. No special diet, no specific exercise plan. No gimmicky dvds or pills or shakes. Less calories, more movement.

No one wants to hear that - everyone wants to think that there's some secret. But there isn't (unless you have medical condition). Just count your calories, do whatever exercise appeals to you, and give it some time and patience.

daross16 · April 2013

I'm just confused because I do move around a lot. :P
Like, I got really lazy when I started college, but before that I was always doing something and things were still the same. I've gotten back to exercising a lot more and doing my whole 1500 calorie thing but nothing really changes.

cmeiron · April 2013

The truth was, I was eating more food than I needed and not moving enough. It sucks to realize it was something that simple, something I could have controlled the whole time. But it's the truth. As soon as I started eating less and moving more, I lost weight. No special diet, no specific exercise plan. No gimmicky dvds or pills or shakes. Less calories, more movement.

No one wants to hear that - everyone wants to think that there's some secret. But there isn't (unless you have medical condition). Just count your calories, do whatever exercise appeals to you, and give it some time and patience.

^^ QFT

I'd been chubby since pre-puberty (grade 5?)

I'd been using the excuse "oh, that's just my natural body type" for years.

In other words, I'd been lying to myself.

The lowest weight I can ever remember being (until now) was 135 lbs - when I was about 13 years old - and that was *after* losing 15 lbs on my first "diet". I'm now 33 years old, and 130 lbs - not chubby any more.

Burn more than you eat (you have to learn what you're eating first), move more, challenge yourself. That's it.

nwg74 · April 2013

I have been overweight since I was 10 years old and by the time I was 36, I was 373 pounds. Now 2 years later I am now 170 pounds,

fittestpal · April 2013

Blame the media!! cave men didn't worry about this crap. if you want to make a change you have to DO. just remember, nothing works unless you do. you can take all the pills and supplements you want... sure you might lose a little but nothing like if you worked hard. by working hard i mean getting outside your comfort zone and staying there. you have to create that intensity. i'm saying this because everyone has it in them to DO. If you think you're fat then you will eat like a fat person and stay fat. If you think you're skinny and eat like a skinny person that's exactly who you will be.

dotamy · April 2013

Something you wrote stood out to me as I was passing thru and wanted to comment -- you mention an allergy to gluten, etc as a preteen. Something you may not know is that allergies don't really ever go away. It may have been dormant, but your body is still negatively reacting to them, in ways you may not realize. Gluten, and many other processed foods can have a disastrous impact on your health, without your realizing it. I highly suggest checking out It Starts with Food, and Wheat Belly. An elimination diet may have a huge impact on your overall well-being, and break some addictions I doubt you know even exist. I did this diet, lost 15lbs and realized I can't ever have cows milk again. Not what I started it expecting, but it's made a big improvement. Just a thought.

SoDamnHungry · April 2013

Something you wrote stood out to me as I was passing thru and wanted to comment -- you mention an allergy to gluten, etc as a preteen. Something you may not know is that allergies don't really ever go away. It may have been dormant, but your body is still negatively reacting to them, in ways you may not realize. Gluten, and many other processed foods can have a disastrous impact on your health, without your realizing it. I highly suggest checking out It Starts with Food, and Wheat Belly. An elimination diet may have a huge impact on your overall well-being, and break some addictions I doubt you know even exist. I did this diet, lost 15lbs and realized I can't ever have cows milk again. Not what I started it expecting, but it's made a big improvement. Just a thought.

Agreed. While I think paying attention to calories burned and eaten is probably your best bet, food allergies can cause a lot of problems. Get it checked again.

dotamy · April 2013

I see now it wasn't an allergy - but that doesn't matter - the elimination of carbs still worked for you. still check out the books. Insulin resistance also plays a tremendous role in your weight loss challenge. Get educated now, while you're 18, and you'll be way ahead of those of us who had to learn this in our 30s or much older. It breaks down to just a decision. Eating healthy isn't hard. To quote the book - kicking heroin is hard. Beating cancer is hard. Eating your vegetable is. Not. Hard. Good luck.

billsica · April 2013

Ok, here you go. :flowerforyou:

Stop being a victim and take control over your life. Your 19 now, no one is going to do anything else for you.

You need to look hard at what you are eating and control that. Work out, Lift heavy. Run, whatever. sign up for a 5 k even.

daross16 · April 2013

I don't think I am a victim.
I have been working hard, trying things I haven't. Eating better.
You make it sound like I'm not trying :P

kevinrbarger · April 2013

I'm just confused because I do move around a lot. :P
Like, I got really lazy when I started college, but before that I was always doing something and things were still the same. I've gotten back to exercising a lot more and doing my whole 1500 calorie thing but nothing really changes.

Wait, what do you mean nothing really changes? According to your ticker you've lost 5 lbs!

5 freaking POUNDS!

That's huge! That's a stack of fresh laundry! That's, like, a pound less than a bowling ball!

You have basically lost a bowling ball. A. Freaking. Bowling. Ball.

There are lots changing for you right now. You'll continue to lose. Yes, it takes time. Some weeks you won't lose anything, others you'll lose a lot and you'll have absolutely no idea what you did differently. But just a pound or two at a time adds up, and it adds up before you know it. Keep on track, don't get discouraged, and take whatever small gains (like even just losing a point or two) for exactly what they are. Victories.

Seriously. A bowling ball.

TLWallperson · April 2013

I don't think I am a victim.
I have been working hard, trying things I haven't. Eating better.
You make it sound like I'm not trying :P

What works for one person doesn't mean it will work for you. Your may need a specific kind of diet , one that is not the norm for most people. You might need to do some research and try different diet/healthy eating before you find what works for you. It took me a long time to realize that I HAVE to have carbs in my diet otherwise I don't function very well. I tried the Atkins diet and it didn't work for me. I have tried many other diets/ eating plans but none of them really worked until I found the one that did work.
I don't know if this will help, but I hope it does. If you have any questions add me as a friend.

Francl27 · April 2013

I was in your shoes! Seriously, always chubby, although in my case my mom always let me eat everything I wanted. Didn't help. IMO your problem is probably that you just eat too much, even if it's healthier things (making you finish corn before dessert for example, if you were not hungry anymore but wanted that brownie, you got the extra corn calories too).

When I was your age I did a diet, lost it all and it all came back because the diet sucked. Now I'm 35, and back on the bandwagon (yep... took me that long to get back on it), and this site is a lifesaver. Just count everything you eat. You will lose weight. You're young... stick to it, not like I did. It's just so worth it.

daross16 · April 2013

"If you think you're skinny and eat like a skinny person that's exactly who you will be."
This has been driving me crazy because my sister's wedding dress is a size 0. And man oh man you would not believe the kinds of things she eats. She likes laying back on the couch and drink beer and snack all the time. She's always been skinny and pretty. She did cheer and volleyball, but even after she stopped all of that she still remained the exact same. I eat smaller portions than her I'm looking at ingredients on the back of boxes...
So I don't think, "Eating like a skinny person" is really the right way to say it.
I really don't care for being skinny anyways. Being skinny really is not my goal. Getting healthier is my goal because my doc says my insulin levels are a teeny bit high. Sooo I wanna not have issues with that.

kbp721 · May 2014

How did you do it if you don't mind me asking?

cosmichvoyager · May 2014

I don't know...I have been chubby and then fat for as long as I can remember but I really started gaining weight when I started eating school food and buying extra candy and junk food on my own as a child, etc. My mother especially was always making me feel guilty or punished about overeating and I remember she made me do Jenny Craig when I was in middle school and it was just mortifying. My weight really like...pushed us apart and caused conflict for my whole life but I believe it was her choice.
She is and was quite fat and had a lot of self-loathing that she just put onto me. I was bullied sometimes and especially gym class and sports became a shameful and traumatizing activity around that same time.

Fast forward 25 years and I am quite heavy, in my mid-30's and starting to experience some negative health impacts of obesity. The first step I took was going to Physical Therapy after an injury, then adding some cardio, then getting a supportive and somewhat therapy-oriented personal trainer to TEACH me how to exercise and empower me to walk into a gym or whatever and just come up with a routine and feel comfortable and not ashamed or alienated. I didn't change my diet.

I felt a lot better and started to be able to do a lot more stuff! strength, flexibility, endurance, etc...wow! In school I I was always told "exercise isn't for fatties" and got either made fun of for being slow or punished with extra laps or singled out by kids or teachers because I was fat. The first great thing I did for myself was to reclaim the fun of exercise and being able and fit (thanks trainer!)

2 years go by and I am still fat but have a lot of muscle under there. My doctor says I have hypertension and since I am young she is giving me 6 months to manage it on my own with diet and exercise. I don't want to be on medicine so I am trying to be more mindful of what I eat and have committed to at least 3 days of exercise a week--2 with a personal trainer, I have actually been going more often because I enjoy it. I am slowly losing weight.

I am tracking my food on here and saw a dietician for some advice. Main thing she said to me is protein+whole grains together is my friend

I am eating a lot less full-fat dairy and have seriously curtailed going to restaurants.

I feel ambivalent sometimes because I don't think fat is ugly or unattractive. I don't hate being fat. I don't even think fat is always unhealthy. My "goal" weight for now is not that low. I will still be considered fat, most likely. Hopefully I will meet my goal of losing 10% of my body weight and can maintain that at least. Main goal is to be happy and healthy and not to have regrets or feel shame about body issues. The real shame should be felt by people who make others feel bad about themselves.

Iwishyouwell · May 2014

I was fat from first grade on.
Became aware that I was fat sometime in the 5th or 6th grade.
I hated, hated being fat. I wasn't even bullied or anything, but somehow being fat always felt very wrong.
I started restricting my calories in middle school.
I was an active kid, just not active enough to combat all the plethora of "normal" foods that I ate in too high quantities.

I lost serious weight starting at 18 and by the time I was 19 I was the thinnest I'd been since I was a little boy.

Regained all the weight, and double, in my mid 20s. Now I'm back on track; check the ticker. I have the best relationship with food I've ever had in my entire life.

It's possible.

fun_b · May 2014

I was exactly the same and I only lost serious weight when I turned 27. For most of my teens/twenties, losing weight felt so difficult and I only wish I knew what I know now. I wasted a lot of my 20's trying to lose weight and failing miserably.

The good thing is that you have time on your side. I wish I had discovered MFP when I was your age. I am now learning things I wish I had known years ago.

Been chubby forever. What is my life?

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