I can't say "no" to myself!

ElliSwan
ElliSwan Posts: 9 Member
in Motivation and Support
Throughout this year I have gone through waves of eating healthy and exercising, but I never seem to stick with it. This latest wave of being healthy has been the longest and I've seen some results, but after the stress of finals week and not having much money my motivation to stay on track has deteriorated. I really want to keep working but I need some help inspiring myself to do it! I just can't say no to myself when I want a doughnut or a frappuccino, and after I've had one I certainly can't say no to a second. This turns into a pattern for me and soon a cheat meal becomes a cheat day which turns into a cheat week then I'm completely off track.

Does anyone have any advice to help me say no to bad foods, and keep me motivated?

Replies

  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    I do this all the time. The important thing is just to decide you want to do it. Live in each moment, forget about previous bad choices, and just decide to make good choices in the future. Let your inner voice be your coach. Remind yourself that no matter what, you want to make better choices.
  • jackpotclown
    jackpotclown Posts: 3,275 Member
    *came in with different expectations* *walks out of thread disappointed*

    giphy.gif

    \m/
  • BigT555
    BigT555 Posts: 2,067 Member
    for the first little while i used to think to myself "i need to lose fat more than i need a donut"
    seemed to work most of the time
  • ew_david
    ew_david Posts: 3,473 Member
    I can't either. I wouldn't say no to anyone else either, at this point.
  • nellyett
    nellyett Posts: 436 Member
    I used to be an "all or nothing" kind of girl. I was either being "good" or being "bad". Now, after all these years I have finally figured out that for me, the only thing that works is moderation.

    For me, it doesn't matter what I eat, or when I eat it to lose weight. Only that I'm in a SLIGHT deficit. The larger the caloric deficit, the more difficult it became to get through the day on track and ultimately I would say forget it and binge at night.

    The best advice I can give you is to suggest that you find out what your TDEE (Total Daily Energy Expenditure) and eat a little less than that. You can find tons and tons of information if you search on MFP for this.

    I was not really a fruit or vegetable eater and didn't enjoy 'healthy' foods for the most part. I heard somewhere that the best thing to do is to ADD the good stuff into your day and the bad stuff will start to fall away bit by bit. And to be honest, the more fresh and whole foods I ate, the less I craved the crap. I was finally giving my body what it needed and I felt noticably better!

    For example, I would start bringing sliced apple or some other fruit to work for a snack. I would add wilted spinach to chili. I googled tons of crockpot recipes. I added sweet potato to my diet and now I love it! Add goat cheese or parmesan to vegetables to enhance the taste, etc. etc.

    At the beginning I would still eat fast food, but would just have a burger and no fries. I would just fit it into my day calorie wise. I still have chocolate everyday, but it's a little bit and I fit it in. Little changes will make big differences. Don't beat yourself up about it, and every little step is a step toward a healthier lifestyle.

    Good luck!
  • delicious_cocktail
    delicious_cocktail Posts: 5,797 Member
    Thought this was something else.
    left disappointed.
  • CallMeCupcakeDammit
    CallMeCupcakeDammit Posts: 9,377 Member
    *came in with different expectations* *walks out of thread disappointed*

    giphy.gif

    \m/

    I know, me too. But regarding OP, you have to remind yourself that even if you don't keep an accurate diary, your body does. You can have a donut. Hell, I had ice cream and pizza for breakfast yesterday. But I made it fit. Well, kinda, but I had a huge deficit from the day before, so it was ok. The point is, you can have these things, you just need to make them fit into your day. This post helped me a lot. http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/925464-fitting-it-in-giggity
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    I can't either. I wouldn't say no to anyone else either, at this point.

    How you doin'? :wink:
  • MostlyWater
    MostlyWater Posts: 4,294 Member
    A little maturity and accountability here, please. If you want a good body, it doesn't come from wishing and sure doesn't come from multiple donuts.
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
    Self discipline- much like weight lifting is a skill. And it can be developed.

    I have found reorganizing THEN restriction works very well- because it's starting small and rarely involves flat out 100% denial.

    What does that mean.
    Say- alcohol (I moved in with an alcoholic and knew my drinking was going up- so I took steps to moderate)- and I HATE denying myself things...

    So I re-organized
    drinking was Friday and Saturday.
    I could have as much or as little as I wanted- some time more- sometimes less- sometimes none- I'm not a HUGE drinker and when I drank it wasn't consistent. So this balanced.

    Then I restricted it a little bit more - no more than XX beers.

    I mostly don't drink at this point- I enjoy a drink maybe once or twice a week- but it's usually only one.

    This was a springing point for developing the ability to shift and reduce and learn how to say NO.

    Now I can walk by whatever I want and just say no- I spent time learning how to readjust- reorganize and fit what I needed and how to say no to stuff I didn't need.

    Work on it- set time frames and mini goals- you can do it- it just takes time and patience.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    A little maturity and accountability here, please. If you want a good body, it doesn't come from wishing and sure doesn't come from multiple donuts.

    LOL WUT?

    I have a pretty banging body and have multiple donut getting there.

    OP you need to learn moderation and find an activity that you enjoy as much as food (which is hard, I know) for when you are stressed. You also have to learn who to have a bad day and start new the next -- also hard, but I find it easier if, after a bad day, I prelog the next. It takes time and you have give up the idea that it will ever be perfect.
  • fittoday14
    fittoday14 Posts: 128
    This is so me! The only way I can get through it is by preparation:

    Write down a list of foods that you like to eat that are good for your health but also within your budget. Buy them and keep them around you.

    Buy 2-3 snack foods and portion them in snack sized zip lock bags. Take one or two of those with you when you're going out- to keep you from grabbing a donut. I buy the Annie's Chocolate Chip Bunnie Grahams (other flavors available) - they're 130 calories for 31 pieces & they're very low in sodium.

    Buy vegetables and fruits that you like and portion them out in small Tupperware containers for the week or for 3 days if you don't have time. I like buying cherry tomatoes, baby carrots, and pistachios.
  • CallMeCupcakeDammit
    CallMeCupcakeDammit Posts: 9,377 Member
    A little maturity and accountability here, please. If you want a good body, it doesn't come from wishing and sure doesn't come from multiple donuts.

    LOL WUT?

    I have a pretty banging body and have multiple donut getting there.

    OP you need to learn moderation and find an activity that you enjoy as much as food (which is hard, I know) for when you are stressed. You also have to learn who to have a bad day and start new the next -- also hard, but I find it easier if, after a bad day, I prelog the next. It takes time and you have give up the idea that it will ever be perfect.

    I know, I was like Been here since 2011? Should know better!
  • MizTerry
    MizTerry Posts: 3,763 Member
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  • sharonus
    sharonus Posts: 102
    As others have said, you can eat anything you want and lose as long as you're maintaining a calorie deficit. Estimate how many calories are in that donut, and how much exercise it would take to burn it off. Then, if you can, do the exercise before getting the donut. One of three things will probably happen:

    1. You'll realize that the donut isn't worth a 30 minute jog for 30 minute
    2. You'll feel so good after exercising you won't want the donut.
    3. You'll be able to enjoy the donut with no guilt!
  • grim_streaker
    grim_streaker Posts: 129 Member
    Dicipline is all that matters, for me anyway.
    When being temptated by say a donut, sweet delicious donut I say to myself. Is it really worth five minutes pleasure( atleast thats how long a donut live in my company) and destroy 30min of that well done exersise? and most of the times I say no its not.. Cause is it really worth it?
  • ElliSwan
    ElliSwan Posts: 9 Member
    Thanks everyone! This is helping me put things into perspective again!
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
    Great info and tips that might help you :)

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1214490-the-wisdom-of-trogalicious?page=1#posts-19000763

    http://body-improvements.com/2013/05/24/undiet-your-diet/

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1122891-9-reasons-fat-loss-is-always-slower-than-you-d-like

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1105036-article-on-flexible-dieting-by-armi-legge?page=1#posts-17068746

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/ihad/view/the-myth-of-good-and-bad-foods-by-eric-helms-588801

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