I weigh more than i look

laurenwantstogetinshape
laurenwantstogetinshape Posts: 12
in Introduce Yourself
hi guys :) I have lost a little weight before i found this website.. don't know how to add pictures so i just made it my profile lol.. I want to try to loose like 10lbs but idk if that will look gross with what I'm at. and i weigh 140 right now. which i don't think corresponds with how i look, i know its go by how you feel but i have the WORST body image and i have no clue if i look good because i ALWAYS think i look bad...
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Replies

  • Kr1ptonite
    Kr1ptonite Posts: 789 Member
    Looking at your profile pic I reckon you look great. Nice shape, you look fit.
  • laurenwantstogetinshape
    laurenwantstogetinshape Posts: 12
    My mom says i should still loose like 10. but i think i look thin now? i mean i weigh like 138 so it seems like a lot but idont think i look like that.
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
    How tall are you?

    What are you doing for exercise? Do you strength train at all?

    And if you have body issues that bad, have you thought about talking to a counselor or therapist?
  • PennyVonDread
    PennyVonDread Posts: 432 Member
    I don't think the issue is weight and it's an unhealthy mindset to think that your weight (specifically) must come off in order for you to be happy. Maybe a body recomp is actually what you should be looking into for body image dissatisfaction. Losing "weight" isn't the same as lowering body fat%, and losing muscle doesn't do you any favors.
  • laurenwantstogetinshape
    laurenwantstogetinshape Posts: 12
    Im 5'5 .. i don't exercise that much lately I've been doing a little walking/running (a mile a day) and I'm gonna start biking.
  • laurenwantstogetinshape
    laurenwantstogetinshape Posts: 12
    and i have been to a therapist. but i just find it hard to believe anyone because i think everyone is lying to me, so theres a underlying reason to that.
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
    and i have been to a therapist. but i just find it hard to believe anyone because i think everyone is lying to me, so theres a underlying reason to that.

    So why would you believe anything anyone on a public forum would say?

    Don't start down the road to losing weight. You could look into recomping but honestly, put that aside and focus on getting mentally healthy.
  • laurenwantstogetinshape
    laurenwantstogetinshape Posts: 12
    yea i guess i just know a lot of people on here are brutally honest, and that they know a lot about what they are talking about.
  • PennyVonDread
    PennyVonDread Posts: 432 Member
    and i have been to a therapist. but i just find it hard to believe anyone because i think everyone is lying to me, so theres a underlying reason to that.

    So why would you believe anything anyone on a public forum would say?

    Don't start down the road to losing weight. You could look into recomping but honestly, put that aside and focus on getting mentally healthy.

    Agreed. This environment can trigger unhealthy relationships with food and exercise if you have a history with them. If you don't trust people, you won't get much out of MFP. Though it's always good to do your own reseach and make your own informed decisions, coming into the situation as distrusting sounds more stressful than beneficial, and your mental health is just as important as your physical health.
  • grubb1019
    grubb1019 Posts: 371 Member
    You do not need to loose any more weight.
  • Kr1ptonite
    Kr1ptonite Posts: 789 Member
    My mom says i should still loose like 10. but i think i look thin now? i mean i weigh like 138 so it seems like a lot but idont think i look like that.

    Don't worry to much about the number, as I'm the same, I look heaps smaller then what my weight says. I don't understand why your mom feels you need 10lbs less. That wouldn't even come to my mind looking at your pics.
  • yungibear
    yungibear Posts: 138 Member
    We don't have a reason to be lying to you. All of us are here to improve our bodies in some way. Lying to each other would not yield the successes that you see among other MFP users.
  • laurenwantstogetinshape
    laurenwantstogetinshape Posts: 12
    Yea i agree, she hears the number and like freaks out.. lol but she looks bigger than me but she's alll about the scale. I agree its unhealthy but i just hear so many things from people and my mom tells me i look big when i think i don't so i get confused blah blah blah.. but if anyone has ideas on how to help that besides counseling (that didn't work) I'm all ears because i want to feel great about my body too
  • bridgie101
    bridgie101 Posts: 817 Member
    hi guys :) I have lost a little weight before i found this website.. don't know how to add pictures so i just made it my profile lol.. I want to try to loose like 10lbs but idk if that will look gross with what I'm at. and i weigh 140 right now. which i don't think corresponds with how i look, i know its go by how you feel but i have the WORST body image and i have no clue if i look good because i ALWAYS think i look bad...

    I think your mum has a 'set weight' in her head that probably has a lot to do with where she feels she should be at, rather than you. Her generation perhaps exercises less, has less muscle and therefore 'expects' to be at a certain 'weight' and that's as far as it goes.

    She will have had forty years stepping on the scales and cringeing if she is 'over' her 'set amount'. You are over it by 10 lb so she feels you should lose it, but her head is not in the game. She's operating on habit and numeric expectations.

    Leave her out of your weight. Don't tell her what you weigh and she will relax. I remember leaving home, I think I gained five pounds and everyone thought I looked fantastic BECAUSE THEY DIDN'T KNOW WHAT i WEIGHED and because I got to buy clothes I wanted, and which fitted me, instead of trying to squeeze into a smaller size.

    Yes, it's that sad, and it's that simple. Don't be cross with her but go with your own instincts on this one. You are slender and beautiful.
  • laurenwantstogetinshape
    laurenwantstogetinshape Posts: 12
    Yea funny thing is i actually have lost weight but i told her i lost more than i did and she believes me, so she really is just focused on the number lol
  • doctorsookie
    doctorsookie Posts: 1,084 Member
    You look fantastic. I thrive to look like you! you understand the whole not seeing what you want in the mirror but maybe not looking in the mirror for a month will help your mindset. Avoid the mirror and go by how you truly FEEL and not what you SEE for a week. Then if that doesn't work, do it for two weeks. And so on and so forth until what you SEE is why you FEEL. Good luck and go on with yourself you hot thing you.
  • aliakynes
    aliakynes Posts: 352 Member
    I think you're going to start seeing too much of your rib cage if you lose another 10lbs. Take up some heavy weight lifting if you need to do something while you work on your self confidence. It would be good for battling depression and shutting out mom's voice in your head.

    P.S. You don't even have a belly; your mom's insane.
  • lisalsd1
    lisalsd1 Posts: 1,519 Member
    If you lost 10 more pounds, would your mom just find something else to criticize?

    I, personally, don't see 10lbs of fat for you to lose.
  • PurpleCupcakes01
    PurpleCupcakes01 Posts: 141
    If you lost 10 more pounds, would your mom just find something else to criticize?

    I, personally, don't see 10lbs of fat for you to lose.

    Agree
  • melimomTARDIS
    melimomTARDIS Posts: 1,941 Member
    I weigh more than I look too, I'm also 5'5, and now weigh 135. Eerie. Anyways, I look thin, I hear it a lot now. I was 175 when I started losing.
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    and i have been to a therapist. but i just find it hard to believe anyone because i think everyone is lying to me, so theres a underlying reason to that.

    that's what you should talk to your therapist about, not your weight.
  • laurenwantstogetinshape
    laurenwantstogetinshape Posts: 12
    I agree. and to the other posts, i know that if i lost 10lbs shed still say more.
  • aledba
    aledba Posts: 564 Member
    Woah. You just said your mom is saying these things? I understand parents may be concerned with their child's well-being, but for her to tell you what you need to do with your body is not right. If she has taught you the importance of a healthy lifestyle, she should leave it at that and give you credit for your adult choices. Ask yourself these questions : Do you feel healthy? Do you have respect for your body and its image? Do you have energy? Are you eating a well balanced diet and getting enough physical activity in? Do you sleep well? Do you have a good support system via friends or other family members? If you cannot answer yes to all of those, I implore you to do a little research, speak to a nutritionist or a different therapist. You seem like you might be having some emotional struggles and you deserve to be happy!
  • AdventureFreak
    AdventureFreak Posts: 236 Member
    buddy request sent. I have some ideas and log daily.
  • RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle
    RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle Posts: 1,349 Member
    You look fabulous!! My scale said 149 today. I'll post a pic....

    Edited to say: i don't think you necessarily have mental issues. It's pretty common to think you look different than others perceive you to look. It wasn't until I took photos and showed them to people that I had a more realistic image of my body:)

    :heart:

    And you look fit and fabulous!!! There, I said it again:)
  • Kymmu
    Kymmu Posts: 1,650 Member
    How lucky you are to look SO good and show more on the scale- are they working properly??
    Who cares how much pressure you exert on the earth's surface when you are fit energetic and healthy?
    Enjoy your wonderful figure and stop worrying about it! :)
  • aledba
    aledba Posts: 564 Member
    Yea i agree, she hears the number and like freaks out.. lol but she looks bigger than me but she's alll about the scale. I agree its unhealthy but i just hear so many things from people and my mom tells me i look big when i think i don't so i get confused blah blah blah.. but if anyone has ideas on how to help that besides counseling (that didn't work) I'm all ears because i want to feel great about my body too
    Your mother may be projecting her body-image concerns onto you. Sadly, if she cannot find some help in healing herself, she may continue to make disparaging remarks against you. If therapy wasn't your thing, you can try some self-help books. A suggestion http://www.amazon.com/The-Body-Image-Workbook-Eight-Step/dp/1572245468/ref=pd_sim_b_7?ie=UTF8&refRID=0Y8H797DPBKE8QZ4W6Q2 Check out any others that look appealing on the site!
  • forkofpower
    forkofpower Posts: 171 Member
    Yea funny thing is i actually have lost weight but i told her i lost more than i did and she believes me, so she really is just focused on the number lol

    Well, there you go. You know your mother is fixed only on meaningless numbers -- so don't listen to her. From your pictures, you look like you're at a really good weight. Your biggest goal right now should be to get mentally healthy -- for which you should talk to a therapist, or some other sort of mental health provider.
  • LoveMyLife_NYC
    LoveMyLife_NYC Posts: 230 Member
    Body image issues aside, you do not "need" to lose weight, as you already look like you are at a healthy body fat percentage. If you're unhappy with the way your body looks, make some strength gains. Eat at a slight deficit and lift heavy in order to do a recomp.

    Or try making fitness goals that have nothing to do with weight loss, as working out does not always need to result in numbers moving on a scale. What do you like to do? My goals include improving my mile time, placing in a local 5k, squatting more than my body weight, and being able to do 2 unassisted pull ups in a row.
  • MelissaPhippsFeagins
    MelissaPhippsFeagins Posts: 8,063 Member
    If you lost 10 more pounds, would your mom just find something else to criticize?

    I, personally, don't see 10lbs of fat for you to lose.

    Agree

    I also agree and want to share a story with you that may help: I went to work Thursday and a coworker said, "What are you down to now, about 115? You look great." She's a sweetie and has never mentioned my weight before, btw, so I know she was sincere. So I told her thank you and went on with my business. I went to the doctor for a hormone shot (my migraines are hormone related, the shots help immensely) on Friday and stepped on her scale for curiousity before I left the office. I weighed 152. 8lbs. The moral: There is a huge difference between what I know about my body and what my friends and coworkers perceive. Don't worry about your mom or even your own perception. You are looking fit, healthy and wonderful.

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