Ordering bridesmaid dress year in advance - what size?!

Hi all. I recently started my weight loss journey and lost my first 10 pounds very quickly. I understand that the weight comes off quite easily at first - even so, I think that I can be down another 70 pounds in by June of next year when I will be a bridesmaid in a friend's wedding. However, we're going to be ordering our dresses within the next month and I don't know what to do.

The designer we're ordering from doesn't allow returns or exchanges so that won't be an option. I've also heard that seamstresses really can't take a dress in more 2 sizes. What should I do!?

Thanks in advance!

Replies

  • Dohrnl
    Dohrnl Posts: 43 Member
    It's been my experience that you should NEVER order down more than 1 size. A good seamstress can do ANYTHING with your dress, so don't let that deter you!
  • lucyford22
    lucyford22 Posts: 198 Member
    Another vote for just one size down...You NEVER know what will happen.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    ... I wouldn't order a dress a year+ out Period. 6-9 months, fine.

    That said, it is easier to take a dress in than let it out. I wouldn't order any more than one size down.
  • Cranquistador
    Cranquistador Posts: 39,744 Member
    can you afford two?
  • gmallan
    gmallan Posts: 2,099 Member
    Is there a particular reason they need to be ordered so far in advance? Can you try to make an argument for holding off at least a few months
  • lucasmoten
    lucasmoten Posts: 143 Member
    It would depend on what you weigh now, and how serious you are about either gains or losses over that period of time. Ignoring your friends wedding, how much effort are you going to commit to over the course of a year for yourself?

    According to your profile, you claim you have 80 pounds to go (5 pounds lost). Or is it 70 (80 total?). I've lost 81 pounds in almost a years time, but I'm a guy, and I started at 260 at a height of 5'11". I would have likely had the advantage of greater muscle mass, and I'd say I put in a pretty serious effort over that time. Not crazy enough to take over my whole life, but enough that I spend maybe 2-4+ hours a day focused on it, either doing exercise, planning meals, schedules, research, ensuring I get appropriate sleep, etc.

    Is your goal to fit a specific size? where are you starting from now?
  • JamieJam1102
    JamieJam1102 Posts: 308 Member
    Is there a particular reason they need to be ordered so far in advance? Can you try to make an argument for holding off at least a few months

    Yup. What she said.
  • Maleficent0241
    Maleficent0241 Posts: 386 Member
    Is there a particular reason they need to be ordered so far in advance? Can you try to make an argument for holding off at least a few months

    Yup. What she said.

    No kidding. I understand 6 months or so, but a year? Crazy. I was in the same boat (well, am still I suppose). I ordered mine a size down (mainly because they were out of my current size), and it already fits now and I am hoping I'll need to take it in by the time the wedding comes around. I figure 15-20 lbs per dress size, which for me is probably the most I'll be able to lose by then anyway so I wasn't concerned with not being able to alter it.

    Honestly, it would have worried me to buy too small and need to lose tons of weight to fit in. Too much money and too much stress if the goal isn't hit and the dress doesn't fit.
  • zoeysasha37
    zoeysasha37 Posts: 7,088 Member
    It's easier to take in a dress, rather then let it out. So I wouldn't order anything more then one or two sizes down. If it's too big, they shouldn't have any problem taking it in.
  • Effalunt
    Effalunt Posts: 40 Member
    I would find out from the dress store exactly how far the dress can be taken in. Depending on the fit and where the seams are, a dress may be able to be taken in one to four sizes. Some styles (corset back for example) can be adjusted for fit without tailoring. Once you know exactly what you're working with, you can make an informed decision.

    That said, I would be conservative with your estimates; better to order the dress a little large and pay for alterations than to have a dress that you cannot feel good wearing.
  • rrlwelter
    rrlwelter Posts: 40 Member
    It's easier to take in a dress, rather then let it out. So I wouldn't order anything more then one or two sizes down. If it's too big, they shouldn't have any problem taking it in.

    Disagree with this. Depending on the style, the seamstress might have to literally take the entire dress apart, recut each piece, and then totally restitch it. And if the bride chose a dress with lace or beading - well, it's pretty much all over then!

    And yes, I do sew and have been begged to take bridesmaid dresses in over 2 sizes... it's NEVER pretty and NEVER fun, and if I charged seamstress fees (I'll only do it for very good friends), it would cost more than the dress originally cost.

    Please - beg, bribe, whatever you can to put off ordering for 6 months!!
  • luckydays27
    luckydays27 Posts: 552 Member
    what is the urgency to order the dress now? if your bride picked out the dress, you can hold off on ordering it until 6 months from now...

    Or, order the size you are right now. Unfortunately, 95% of all diets fail. And doing it for an event that is a year away might not be incentive enough to get the pounds off.

    I am not saying this to be cruel, I am saying to be real.

    Dieting for a specific event, and one that is many temptations away, is really, really hard. You would be better served to make your lifestyle change and not "diet". You will be more successful and learn more than on your journey then dieting for someone else's wedding.
  • FireOpalCO
    FireOpalCO Posts: 641 Member
    Is the bride paranoid that the dress she selected will go off the market between now and the wedding? Pull her aside and tell her that ordering a dress a year in advance is asking for a bridesmaid to get knocked up. :laugh:
  • snazzyjazzy21
    snazzyjazzy21 Posts: 1,298 Member
    It's easier to take in a dress, rather then let it out. So I wouldn't order anything more then one or two sizes down. If it's too big, they shouldn't have any problem taking it in.

    Disagree with this. Depending on the style, the seamstress might have to literally take the entire dress apart, recut each piece, and then totally restitch it. And if the bride chose a dress with lace or beading - well, it's pretty much all over then!

    And yes, I do sew and have been begged to take bridesmaid dresses in over 2 sizes... it's NEVER pretty and NEVER fun, and if I charged seamstress fees (I'll only do it for very good friends), it would cost more than the dress originally cost.

    Please - beg, bribe, whatever you can to put off ordering for 6 months!!

    Disagree with part one or two? It's definitely easier to take a dress in than make it bigger, but I agree that it could be very time consuming and costly if the dress isn't a simple design. I'd try to hold off as long as you can.
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,942 Member
    I wouldn't order a dress a whole year prior to a wedding, but I'd wonder why the bride wanted this done. Is she afraid you guy's bolt if you don't pay for your dresses now? :bigsmile:

    All kidding aside, I'd order the size you are now because that's the size you are. If you go down a size or two, you take it to a seamstress.
  • kelly1195
    kelly1195 Posts: 3
    can you afford two?

    Unfortunately, no :(
    According to your profile, you claim you have 80 pounds to go (5 pounds lost). Or is it 70 (80 total?). I've lost 81 pounds in almost a years time, but I'm a guy, and I started at 260 at a height of 5'11". I would have likely had the advantage of greater muscle mass, and I'd say I put in a pretty serious effort over that time. Not crazy enough to take over my whole life, but enough that I spend maybe 2-4+ hours a day focused on it, either doing exercise, planning meals, schedules, research, ensuring I get appropriate sleep, etc.

    Is your goal to fit a specific size? where are you starting from now?

    I'm extremely committed to this. My days are focused around schoolwork and fitness. (congrats on your amazing work btw!) I don't think I've entered my weight loss into my profile yet. The 5 lbs lost thing was just an adjustment I made after realizing I didn't have my correct starting weight entered. I started at 215, am currently at 205, and think that I can reach 135 by June '15. I don't have a specific size goal - I just want to be at a healthy size for my height.
    Is the bride paranoid that the dress she selected will go off the market between now and the wedding?

    I'm really not sure why she's in such a rush to order them... All of the bridesmaids have different dresses (same fabric/designer though), so it's not like we have to worry about them selling out or anything... I'm not really sure how to ask if I can hold off on ordering right away without sounding incredibly selfish.
    Dieting for a specific event, and one that is many temptations away, is really, really hard. You would be better served to make your lifestyle change and not "diet". You will be more successful and learn more than on your journey then dieting for someone else's wedding.

    I'm not "dieting" nor is this for the wedding. I started my journey before I was asked to be in the bridal shower and will continue if (god forbid) the wedding is cancelled, postponed etc. This IS a lifestyle change. I've started regularly exercising for the first time in my life and am seeing a nutritionist and paying close attention to the kinds of things I put in my body. I made this decision because I needed to get healthy, not because I wanted to look good at a random event.
  • kelly1195
    kelly1195 Posts: 3
    It's easier to take in a dress, rather then let it out. So I wouldn't order anything more then one or two sizes down. If it's too big, they shouldn't have any problem taking it in.

    Disagree with this. Depending on the style, the seamstress might have to literally take the entire dress apart, recut each piece, and then totally restitch it. And if the bride chose a dress with lace or beading - well, it's pretty much all over then!

    And yes, I do sew and have been begged to take bridesmaid dresses in over 2 sizes... it's NEVER pretty and NEVER fun, and if I charged seamstress fees (I'll only do it for very good friends), it would cost more than the dress originally cost.

    Please - beg, bribe, whatever you can to put off ordering for 6 months!!

    I'm not dead-set on a dress yet, but my options are all pretty simple: solid colors, basic shapes, and chiffon-y material. The one I like the most is a V-front with a natural waist and an a-line silhouette. How easy/difficult would this be to take in?

    (thanks for your great response by the way!)
  • 3dogsrunning
    3dogsrunning Posts: 27,167 Member
    I'm extremely committed to this. My days are focused around schoolwork and fitness. (congrats on your amazing work btw!) I don't think I've entered my weight loss into my profile yet. The 5 lbs lost thing was just an adjustment I made after realizing I didn't have my correct starting weight entered. I started at 215, am currently at 205, and think that I can reach 135 by June '15. I don't have a specific size goal - I just want to be at a healthy size for my height.

    I completely understand this, but as someone who was very active and suddenly was sidelined after an accident and ended up putting on weight, I can honestly say sometimes life happens. Family members get ill, work gets hectic, injuries happen, people get pregnant, committment can wane for all kinds of reasons.
    Plus, you don't know what size or shape you will be at that weight even if you do lose it all.

    I would contact the company myself and find out their policies, how early you have to order, even what their rush order policy is. My bridesmaids waited until the very last minute to order and ended up paying $50 extra to have the dresses rush ordered (not my choice, theirs). After that, speak to the bride to explain your position and order the dress later down the road.

    I strongly urge you not to order a dress more than one size down when you do order it. As it has been said, it is easier to take a dress in than let it out. Stress when dieting is not helpful.
  • nilbogger
    nilbogger Posts: 870 Member
    Dresses can actually be taken in A LOT. When I was in my sister's wedding I know one of the bridesmaid's ended up being way too big, but her seamstress was able to make it look great.

    You don't have to order when you go to pick out the dresses. Just make a note of the style and order later. Don't listen to all the bull about dye lots and needing to order at the same time.
  • Egon9123
    Egon9123 Posts: 44 Member
    I wouldn't order this far in advance. First, you never know how much you could gain or lose! Life happens!
    Also, you never know what can happen between the couple. Weddings are stressful, it would be a shame if someone called the wedding off and you already paid for the dress :(
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    presumably if you're a bridesmaid then the bride is a close friend, who knows you are trying to lose weight? i dont think its selfish to let her know you hope to be smaller come the wedding and that ordering a year in advance makes it tricky.

    who's paying for your dress?
  • jennau1
    jennau1 Posts: 9 Member
    I am in a similar situation, as the bride though. I ordered my dress over a year ahead of the wedding (this September). I ordered the size that I was then.
    No matter how dedicated you are, I'd say don't order more than 2 sizes down, just in case! The dress can always be altered down, but is hard to go up. (It also depends on the style of dress, if it is fitted, it's more of an issue than if it is a flowing baby doll-type dress)
    It might be more expensive from all of the needed alterations if you go down, say, 6 dress sizes, but it's worth it! You can't let a dress hold up your weightloss. Best of luck!
  • AlliSteff
    AlliSteff Posts: 211 Member
    They always tell you to order those things too big, anyway!

    My sister is getting married this July and the dresses arrived in late April- I didn't get mine form her until this past week. We ordered them last November if that gives you a helpful timeline. I ordered down 1 size than I was measured last summer, and it fits almost perfectly...if you must order now, just go down 1 size. It can always be taken in. I have gotten dresses that were swimming on me, and any good tailor can fix it!

    The bride will probably all want them ordered together so they come from the same dye lot- this is more important on brighter colors (reds especially) and less important for colors like navy.

    A year out is a long time for bridesmaid dresses- you could wait for 8 months at least.
  • eldamiano
    eldamiano Posts: 2,667 Member
    Just let them wear under/oversized clothes. Dont worry. Weddings are overrated anyway.
  • rrlwelter
    rrlwelter Posts: 40 Member
    You're welcome.

    The chiffon-y material can be tricky, but if you're talking a basic halter style with low v, cumberband waist, and gored skirt, it would be a pain but not a huge one. Some seamstresses do charge more for all the chiffon (it's typically double or triple the width of the under fabric, so there's a lot to reapportion), so I'd ask some local seamstresses what they would charge.