Theme Park Embarassment

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RosieB405
RosieB405 Posts: 150 Member
in Motivation and Support
This weekend my boyfriend took me to Hershey theme park. We got there later in the day and I was excited to ride as much as possible. We got on the first ride and unfortunately the safety bar would not close over him so he couldn't ride and I got off as well to be supportive. After that he did not really want to get on anything so we mostly just walked around until it started to storm. Luckily we were able to get rain checks since we had only been there about an hour before the rain closed everything. My question is now he wants to have his daughters birthday party there next month and I know he will be embarrassed to get on anything if he thinks this will happen again but I don't know how to encourage him to start making changes now since we have a month until the party.

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  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
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    Just start talking to him about it. Does he want to change? Was that experience enough to motivate him? Does he want/need your support? If he answers no then leave it be. He'll figure it out eventually. Oh and make sure you make it about his health and assure him that you love him no matter what.
  • MeganAnne89
    MeganAnne89 Posts: 271 Member
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    This is a bit hard because you want to be as supportive as possible because the main goal is to be healthy, but when you tell someone that you feel that they need to lose weight, not just for their health but so that they no longer need to go through potentially emotionally traumatizing events, they can often see it as an attack and they become very defensive about it, which can make them take three steps back instead of one step forward.

    How overweight is he? Because the good thing for him is that by simply adjusting his diet and by not snacking too much, he could see a noticeable difference in not too much time (assuming he is decently overweight and also because he is a man and it is generally easier for men to drop the pounds).

    Do you live together? Because you could suggest cooking slightly different meals or making things for him that are healthier and just explaining that you yourself want to be fitter and healthier and it would be nice if you could support each other in that way.

    I'm not sure about a month, that's most likely aiming way too high, but maybe he could at least feel better then because he'd know he was on the right track.
  • chism21
    chism21 Posts: 155 Member
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    Do noot approach the topic directly
    I repeat Do noot approach the topic directly :wink:

    We, men tend to be very sensible about our weight even thought we don't show it that much. (mainly because of our ego)
    if he is planning the girls birthday in the park after that fiasco, it is because he is planning to use this as a motivator to get in shape. However you can help him indirectly.
    suggest going in a hike.
    go bike riding on weekends
    and even tell him you are going in cleanse and that he doing it with you will make you feel stronger.
    But for his manliness sake don't ask him to lose weight.

    P.s. if he ask you for help, then you can do whatever you want to support him even nagging at him
  • RosieB405
    RosieB405 Posts: 150 Member
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    @Megan

    We do not live together but I do suggest things for us to do that are more active and cook healthier meals but I need to know how do I motivate him to do those things when I am not around. I even bought him a fitbit so we can both track our steps but he only wears it about 3 days a week.

    I really think 10 lbs or so would have allowed him to fit in the rid but his face as they were trying to force down the bar is just something I don't want him to experience again since his family and most importantly his daughter will be there.
  • RosieB405
    RosieB405 Posts: 150 Member
    Options
    Do noot approach the topic directly
    I repeat Do noot approach the topic directly :wink:

    We, men tend to be very sensible about our weight even thought we don't show it that much. (mainly because of our ego)
    if he is planning the girls birthday in the park after that fiasco, it is because he is planning to use this as a motivator to get in shape. However you can help him indirectly.
    suggest going in a hike.
    go bike riding on weekends
    and even tell him you are going in cleanse and that he doing it with you will make you feel stronger.
    But for his manliness sake don't ask him to lose weight.

    P.s. if he ask you for help, then you can do whatever you want to support him even nagging at him

    Thanks great advice!
  • SonicDeathMonkey80
    SonicDeathMonkey80 Posts: 4,489 Member
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    Go to a waterpark instead.
  • forkofpower
    forkofpower Posts: 171 Member
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    Why go to this theme park if he knows he can't fit in the rides?

    I don't think there really is a 'good' or tactful way to bring up something like this. If a person isn't ready to lose weight, then it's really easy for them to feel like they're being attacked, especially if they're insecure about their weight (which most people are). Maybe talk to him about your goals to be healthier, and your meal plans/exercise, and he'll decide to join in?
  • sam_r_i
    sam_r_i Posts: 37 Member
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    Almost this exact situation is what caused me to start losing weight. I was able to fit on all the rides, but just barely. From experience I know how embarrassing that was, so I'm sure this is worse. I'm guessing he'll use this as motivation as well, so just be there to encourage him.

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