Needing some friendship and motivation

pammysay
pammysay Posts: 6 Member
in Motivation and Support
For years I have battled my weight and depression. I feel like they go hand in hand. On the outside I pretend fairly well. Trying to always be the smiling, happy person but inside I am crying and lonely and wishing I could just fall asleep and not wake up. Thankfully my two amazing children wake me up each day and remind me why I should stick around. However this past year has been pretty difficult. My marriage is a mess, my job(s) is up in the air, my weight is high and not going anywhere and I am friendless.

I had my son's 5th birthday party a week or so ago and even though I try to stay out of all pictures, my mother-in-law managed to get me in one. I have cried so much over it.

I am in a weird boat though (not an excuse). I work 4 jobs, have two kids, go to grad school two nights a week and do ALL the driving since my husband can not drive until next April. I am beyond worn out. I am tired ALL the time, cranky, completely depressed, and beyond lonely. I have very few friends and the ones I have do not keep me nearly as high on their list and I do them on mine. :(

I need to find some kind of motivation to move forward, to make a change, but am finding it very hard to find even 10 minutes in my day.

I was recently diagnosed with gluten sensitivity which has FINALLY taken care of chronic stomach pain that I had for years but am finding it hard to eat normally because I'm ALWAYS running around. I always want things that will make me feel better (emotionally) not physically. I wish i wanted fruits and veggies, instead of pizza and tacos.

I'm not sure what i'm looking for posting this. Maybe I just needed to get it out, i know i'm looking for some motivation, someone to get on me about doing this. A friend maybe who will bug me and tell me to get up off my *kitten* and that I can do it.

who knows-

Thanks for reading.

Replies

  • MellysMommy
    MellysMommy Posts: 1 Member
    I can totally relate to your post. I too battle depression and anxiety and I'm also a graduate student with 5 kids. I work full time for a pharmaceutical company and feel like I'm burning the candle at both ends. Of course I want to be healthy but I hate the way I look even more. My goal is to lose 100lbs by graduation next May. Getting started is so hard and very few people understand. You can totally do it though. If you have the motivation for grad school, you can do this too!! Don't give up!! :)
  • NICOLEMARIE001
    NICOLEMARIE001 Posts: 15
    Hi Ladies,

    I am in a similar boat but am doing much better than when I first started. I have two children and I own a small accounting business. Trying to find time to exercise was close to impossible. I am also a sugar addict. I'm always running around and was eating a ton of fast food before I started my diet three weeks ago. The way that I've kept on track for the past 22 days is that I pack healthy snacks with me EVERYWHERE I go. I usually have a ziplock baggie of pretzels (1.5 servings), baby carrots, strawberries, raspberries, apples, and even one or two Snack Wells Devils Food cookies (the are fat free). My bag of snacks are it for the day so I usually try to save the cookies. I also bring a microwave meal (LOVE Smart Ones Three Cheese Ziti) with me for lunch every day. For dinner I either cook something healthy or, if I'm in a hurry or got home late, I'll have another microwave meal. I've been going to the grocery store almost every day for three weeks to constantly restock my healthy food. For an after dinner dessert I eat a Skinny Cow Ice Cream Sandwich.

    I've also managed to find time to work out (although it's not easy). Some evenings I'll take my kids and the dog for a walk. I bought a FitBit Zip pedometer and try to walk as many steps as possible in a day. So even if I can't make it to the gym I'm still
    moving around more. I park farther away and go for a walk/hike with my kids every weekend.

    I have tried dieting more times than I can count. I am not sure this go around will last but I'm really hoping it does. I'm just taking it one day at a time (like the food addict that I am) and would love to make some new friends on here for support. I am adding you both right now. :)

    -Nicole
  • tmj4477
    tmj4477 Posts: 145 Member
    I battle depression myself and I really understand where you are coming friend. A friend request has already been sent to you! :wink:
  • jbladecki
    jbladecki Posts: 15 Member
    This is so what I am looking for today! I second all of you and will be adding you all right now. I also have depression, anxiety, full time Wife/Mother/Chauffer/Softball-Basketball-Volleyball Fan/Employee and have no time for myself. Feel free to add me and help me stay motivated also!
  • faithwalkz
    faithwalkz Posts: 3
    I feel you.We're sisters now.All in this together.Depression also have been my issue for years.So i'm an emotional eater.that sucks.
  • Kitten2629
    Kitten2629 Posts: 1,358 Member
    My heart went out to while I read this and I applaud all you do. I felt exhausted just picturing myself doing all that.

    I too suffer from depression. I work full time, I am in school at night full time, and of course two kids that like to run me ragged some days. I sent a fr..
  • CindyMarcuzAdams
    CindyMarcuzAdams Posts: 4,007 Member
    I have depression and anxeity as well, tbo happily medicated. Its under control...most of the time...now its time to get me under control. I will add you as a friend. Cindy
  • mommyrunning
    mommyrunning Posts: 495 Member
    Feel free to add me as a friend. I understand the stress of being a working mom who is also a student. I have a 5 yr old and a 1 yr old. One suggestion would be to focus on nutrition to help you start losing weight. That can get you started and help even when it's tough to find time to exercise. As far as exercise you can try to squeeze 15 min in here and there and do things like take the stairs and park a little further away or do squats and lunges while cooking. Every little bit adds up. Youtube has kids' yoga videos that you could do with the kids and that would probably help some too. Hang in there. You can do this.
  • rockinsockstaliea
    rockinsockstaliea Posts: 24 Member
    I understand where you are coming from. I have had depression since I was a teen and it does affect the way you look at almost everything. Im an emotional eater so anytime I get upset I would turn to food. i still do on some bad days and then feel horrible guilt but it is getting better. I hav a 5yr old son myself and I look back at just last yr and see how much bigger I was and all i feel is horrible. i know I still have a long way to go but you have to remember that you are worth it and it will be worth it all in the end. I do have to say that since Ive been losing the weight my depression has gotten so much less. i still have my days but it really has helped. I look at myself and say "IM WORTH IT" and so is my family.

    the first 2 weeks are the hardest I think and they were for me but I stuck to it. I kept giving myself excuses that I wasnt ready to work out, that I needed someone to push me and work out with me, I dont have the time to pack my lunches or snacks or cook dinner, i cant afford the gym...and so on. I finally got to the point where I was done. I didnt like going thru all my family pics and seeing that I was either in them only shoulders and up or not in them at all. that broke my heart.

    just look at the big picture! you see all in front of you and know its a decision you are making and you can do it!!! im here for you anytime you need to talk. already sent friend request.

    stay strong lovey :)
    T

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