730 Days and Counting

So.

Saturday, May 24th was my 2 year MFPversary. I'm crap with words, so if you don't want to suffer through that part, pics are at the bottom. :flowerforyou:

Where I started:
My boyfriend and I had just broken up. I was pissed and quite honestly, scared. I realize now how ridiculous that was... I wasn't afraid for my health, I was worried that as a fat girl, no one else would want me. When I was 8 years old, my grandmother told me as much. "You want the boys to like you, right? Boys don't like fat girls." So started my fear of forever being fat and years of self-fulfilling prophecy. After the break up, I weighed in at 174 pounds, which was the highest I had ever SEEN the scale. I think that before that, I probably weighed near 200 pounds though I avoided scales more than cameras.

At first, weight loss seemed easy. I lost 30 pounds in the first six months I was at it. I was underfueling my body and spending ridiculous amounts of time at the gym. Some days I was there for more than three hours. How the HELL I managed to do that is beyond me... Granted, I would end up out of commission for a while because I would get sick. A lot. Eating 1200 calories is bad enough, but eating 1200 calories AND three hours at the gym? Bad. Bad, bad, bad. There was one weekend where I was laid up at home because my body HURT. Not like muscle soreness... My joints ached. Moving my body was a goliath task. Never again.

That's about the time I discovered that MFP had forums. I had seen the little "Most recent" list on the right side of the page, but I had NO IDEA that there were other people I could talk to about losing weight. I had NO IDEA that there was a sea of inspirational people at my fingertips just waiting to give me the advice and tough love that I needed.

I learned that "toning" isn't actually a thing. I learned that lifting weights wouldn't make me some manly she-hulk and that the women on this site who lift are damn hot! I learned that it is as simple as Cals in vs. Cals out, but that I also needed to properly fuel my body. I learned what Macros were. I learned that women like me - women with PCOS - sometimes have issues with carbs and around the same time I learned about IIFYM, cut back on those and focused more on the fats and proteins in my diet. I've also learned that the people I have met on this site are amazing, inspiring people themselves and while a pat on the back and a "good job" is always appreciated when I work out or close out my diary, just having them around to joke with and learn from has been the most rewarding part of MFP.


Where I'm at now:
I'm two years in, but I haven't met my goal yet. Actually, my weight loss kind of stalled after that initial 30 pounds and I've been slowly working it off since. I may not have lost pounds, but I have lost inches since the end of 2012 and I would take that over the scale moving any day. I can't say that the seeing the numbers on the scale holding steady doesn't still bother me, I just have to remind myself just because the scale isn't moving, it doesn't mean that nothing is happening!

Between May and November 2012, I lost about 14.5 inches and with that I lost 33 pounds. I went from a size 14 dress to a size 12. My pants went from an overflowing 12 to a 10.

Since November 2012 I lost 13.5 inches but I only lost about 5 pounds (I was stuck at 143 for 18 months and I've FINALLY managed to push the scale downward again!). I went from a size 10 dress to a size 6 (I'm sure it's vanity sizing, but I don't give a damn!). My pants are a size 6 too. As of Saturday I weighed in at 137.3 pounds.


Where I want to be:
I wouldn't mind the scale dropping a bit more, but what I really want is to reduce my body fat by AT LEAST another 10%. Last time I checked it was around 30.

What I REALLY want is to be stronger. I want to be the friend that other friends call to help move (not just because I enjoy moving stuff), but because I can lift the heavy crap. It makes me happy. It makes me feel accomplished.


And the pictures:


2010 - Probably my highest weight.


This was about the time that I started on MFP. Just a few days later, actually.


November 2012


May 24th 2014

*Edited to fix pic sizes!*