Afraid of losing the weight?

Weimamama
Weimamama Posts: 10
edited September 22 in Motivation and Support
I have over 100lbs to lose. I was just making mini-goals for myself and at first I was getting so disappointed about how long it seemed it was going to take. Then, once I started getting to the lower weights and just freaked out. Maybe it is a fear of failing yet again...who knows?

Replies

  • Egothegreat
    Egothegreat Posts: 11
    It is scary at first. But after that first week goes by and you will see your life change for the better. Remember that this is a life change and every step you take now is going to make drastic improvements in your wellness and lifestyle. I'm almost done with my first month, I still have a little over a hundred pounds to go but I feel great. I sleep better, I find i'm always happy, and I'm doing things physically I haven't done in a long time.

    I say to you this, trust me it's worth it.
  • Jourdan_Rystrom
    Jourdan_Rystrom Posts: 176 Member
    Well you're never going to get ANYWHERE unless you try! It IS hard, but if you REALLY want to lose the weight and control your willpower one day at a time, you'll get it done!!!
  • raindancer
    raindancer Posts: 993 Member
    Yes, terrified.
    In 2004 I was at my heaviest I weighed 306 lbs. This weeks weigh in I am at 222. I just keep trying
    It is one day one pound at a time. I would love for it to be quick but its not. I just refuse to give up.
    Always remember failure is not falling down its not getting up.
  • AggieCass09
    AggieCass09 Posts: 1,867 Member
    Presumably you did not put on those 100 pounds in three months so it is not reasonable to think that you will lose them quickly either. The small goals are best for keeping you motivated and making this attainable but you have to WANT to lose the weight. What are you afraid of? attention? a different lifestyle than the one you are living now? how others will perceive you? or whatever...

    Decide that you ARE going to lose the weight FOR YOU and it is going to take some time but it is for the better. Reward yourself when you meet goals (every 5 or 10 pounds for example) and don't beat yourself up if you are a bit off sometimes. Also, try not to overwhelm yourself with changing lots of different things at once or you will never be able to get/keep the weight off. For example, for January say that you will track your food (EVERYTHING that goes into your mouth) every day AND you will get at least 20 minutes of exercise five days a week. In February, once these two reasonable things are now habits, add another thing to focus on (cutting out soda or sodium or whatever) and just make these new things part of your daily routine. Then you wont be focusing on losing the weight but rather on becoming healthy and the weight will come off thereafter.

    Good luck! You CAN do this!
  • velix
    velix Posts: 437 Member
    sometimes its the fear of the unknown - we put so much emphasis (sometimes) on how things would be better if we were to lose the weight - that what happens if it isn't all we built it up to be? Maybe the back pain is still there because it's a slipped disc issue and not just about weight.... or what if we are still not happy after 100 lbs - sometimes our weight is our security blanket; it's our excuse, it is our identity whether we like it or not. For many, the weight is not just about the physical bits, but the mental bits that go along with the weight. Food as comfort, as an addiction, as replacement, etc. Even with the weight loss, have you dealt with the emotional side that led to the weight loss?

    I completely understand about being afraid to lose the weight - after the wow factor - what comes afterwards? the maintenance stage? the lifestyle change ..... my advice (and what I am doing as I try to lose 54 lbs) is to try to fix the other things that were broken too - not just the number on the scale.

    Good Luck - and MFP is a great place for support!
  • jayshann
    jayshann Posts: 39 Member
    Well, at least you are smart enough to know what it really is....Congrats, I want to lose around 130 pounds. Yes well over a hundred and sometimes i feel a little overwelmed with the position I have put myself in. What keeps me going is that I am a very spiritual person and i know that God has a plan for my life and I have a healthy person inside of me and that my wife and kids are waiting to meet him. It did not take one day for my body to get out of whack and it is going to take a little bit of time to get it striaght.

    My suggestion for you would be to do the best you can today and when you wake up tomorrow do a little better than yesterday. Pretty soon your outside will start to match the beautiful person on the inside. Once you see the success it will motivate you to keep going.
  • TaraMaria
    TaraMaria Posts: 1,975
    Mini goals are absolutely the best!!! I was the same way...I didn't want to set my way up for failure. Such a perfectionist I was that I didn't want to give myself a goal only not to complete it. However that is silly. Make the goal small. Start with 7 pounds increments. When you loose the first 7 pounds treat yourself to a new nail polish. 14 pounds? A new shirt! 21 pounds? A haircut and style! This is all about you! Give yourself rewards! Something attainable that you can look forward to. Many of the people on this site have their goals listed in their signatures. Something they can look at all of the time and be reminded of. Don't look at the HUGE number. Look at the next baby step. The next little goal! :o) YOU can do this girl!
  • superwmn
    superwmn Posts: 936
    I've been where you are right now and I totally get this. I'd tried and failed so many times that I didn't think I had it in me to try even one more time. The pain of failing was too much to bear.

    THAT said, we only REALLY fail when we stop trying, right?

    My original goal was 80lbs which seemed SO daunting to me when I set it. To make it more manageable, I broke it into 8lb segments. Every time I lost 8 lbs, I was 10% closer to goal. Before I knew it, I was 20% to goal, 30% to goal, then 100% to goal! Even a 2lb loss got me 25% closer to checking another 10% off the list.

    We get to make choices every day for the rest of our lives. The choices you make can either keep you at your current weight or move you in the direction you want to head. Little choices made every day for the rest of our lives. You get to make the choices over these days no matter what. Why not make choices that get you where you want to be?

    The weight was 'working' for me on many levels and I was terrified to give it up. Food was my only solace/comfort/escape and I had no idea how to get through the day without it. Thing is, food really isn't comforting. When the food I turned to for comfort is eaten, I'm still feeling whatever it was I was eating to try to avoid. So now I still feel bad and, to boot, I've added all the negative feelings associated with over eating (discomfort, guilt, feelings of failure, feeling like I have no self control, feeling helpless) to that original feeling I was trying to avoid. CLEARLY food was not comforting me, but I had no idea how to find out what WAS comforting.

    That was the biggest part of my journey and the key to my success. I stopped eating and started experiencing life. All of it. Even the uncomfortable and scary parts.

    YOU CAN DO THIS!!!

    Charmagne
  • luv2ash
    luv2ash Posts: 1,903 Member
    you'll be amazed how good it feels to lose 10 pounds, and that "high" keeps you going. And next thing you know, you've lost 20 pounds, and OMG, that feels even better--and the will and determination get stronger as you go along!
  • pftjill
    pftjill Posts: 488
    Do your best-it takes 30 days to make a habit. My heaviest was 250 lbs. I got up there when I was in the hospital with my 1st born-she was hospitalized at 3 weeks old for 9 weeks-with one surgery after the next. So laying around and eating junk every day didn't help. I went home and took a picture with a friend and when I saw it said-really that is what I look like. It didn't hit me until that picture. So from then on I decided I didn't want to look like that.

    It is good to have a large goal and some smaller goals. Just don't focus on the larger goals. My first goal is to lose 20 lbs. That will get me to my pre-pregnancy weight. After that I want 20 more lbs to get to where I was a year an a half ago when I was able to do my first sprint triathlon. After that I want to lose as much as I can to be able to see the definition I have put in my muscle. However I am not going to focus on that until I can get to that point. Don't get discouraged, just keep on the path you are going write yourself a letter telling your new self how you feel and how you don't ever want to go back-seal it up and read it next year when you are doing so well. You can do this just don't look back only to what your amazing future brings. If you want it and it sounds like you do-you will do this.
  • Nina74
    Nina74 Posts: 470 Member
    I have over 100 lbs to lose and found, like you, I was getting frustrated that I wasn't making my mini-goals. I found if I focused on non-scale mini-victories, it helped me (smaller sizes, better endurance, able to lift heavier weights, etc).

    Thanks!

    Nina
  • johnson30usa
    johnson30usa Posts: 30
    Jay.. your doing amazing.. .look at you go!!! Way to succeed..
  • jamie1888
    jamie1888 Posts: 1,704 Member
    Take it one day at a time! You can do it! :flowerforyou:
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