The WORST binge ever

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I'm a 26 year old female, 5 ft 2 inches. According to every online site, my personal trainer, and myfitnesspal I need to eat 1200 calories a day and work out 5 times per week to lose a pound a week. I have been doing this pretty strictly for the past 7 weeks. The couple weeks alone I lost 12 pounds!! But for the last 3 weeks I've lost only one and my weight keeps going up and down. Right now I'm at 150. 10 pounds to go until I hit the upper cut off for "healthy" weight.

Last night things got really really out of control. Around 8pm I had a little under 200 calories left and was stressed out so I decided to have an oversized glass of red wine to finish my day…the first alcohol of any kind since I started. Well needless to say I was pretty tipsy! It started off as a normal binge. I ate a luna bar and an entire cantaloupe. Not that bad. Then I had another luna bar. Then I had a piece of toast with cheese. Still doesn't warrant the title of the worst binge ever right?

I had another glass of wine and that's when my brain straight up left my body. I told my roommate I was going to run to the CVS, but that was not my plan. I drove straight to my favorite Mcdonalds only to discover that within the 7 weeks I've been dieting, it closed! I should take that as a sign right? No. I drove to the new one down the street. It wasn't officially open until tomorrow. I should probably just go home? No. I drove a couple more miles down the road to a THIRD mcdonalds, order a quarter pounder with cheese, 6 mcnuggets, ranch dressing, and medium fry and a diet coke(lol at the DIET coke). I inhale it all in the car of the parking lot. My roommate calls because I've been gone an hour and I tell her I'm getting gas. She asks if I could pick her up some spice she needs since I'm supposedly right next to Publix. Sure no problem! I drive back to Publix, grab her turmeric, and head straight to the bakery! Anyway, you can guess what happened next...

I feel SO horrible, mostly emotionally. I slept until noon because I did not want to open my eyes and face the reality of what I did. I don't know what is wrong with me. I worked so hard and undid everything. I don't even recall enjoying it because I was tipsy and ate it incredibly fast. I straight up feel like the worst, most embarrassing, disgusting human being on the planet. I added it up this morning and it was 3500 calories at least. I'm contemplating fasting for 3 days but I know that's unrealistic and it probably won't bode well when I arrive at the personal trainer tomorrow ready to pass out.

Anyway, I felt I had to write all this down and I'm far too embarrassed to tell my roommates, friends, or family.
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Replies

  • usmcmp
    usmcmp Posts: 21,220 Member
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    I've done worse. Today is a new day.

    My suggestion is to change your weight loss goal on here to half a pound a week. It will give you more calories and you'll be less likely to binge.

    http://www.niashanks.com/20-tips-binge-eating/
  • jodynolte
    jodynolte Posts: 243 Member
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    Today is a new day... you cannot rewind, so let it go. Get up, start the day, go to the gym and get back on track. You can do this! We have all had our binges and you just start again...
  • marialynn2014
    marialynn2014 Posts: 89 Member
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    I think this is the first step to admitting it to yourself. Maybe you need to take a SMALL step back. Don't give up fast food all together, go down a day at the personal trainer. Give yourself a little wiggle room. All I can tell you, it is a new day and don't give up on yourself. You are worth it. Take it one day at a time and try to make better choices today.
  • yungibear
    yungibear Posts: 138 Member
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    I agree that it might be your low calorie intake coupled with increased physical activity. Perhaps you are losing too fast? On days that I eat 1200, I am completely sedentary.

    You have eaten 3500 calories in your binge, but as the poster above me has said, it is one day. You've lost 12 pounds so far and it's quite an achievement!
  • SonicDeathMonkey80
    SonicDeathMonkey80 Posts: 4,489 Member
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    How about you do the world a favor and not drink and drive, k? If your selfish wants are worth putting others at risk, your *kitten* should be in jail. Binge there.
  • awtume9
    awtume9 Posts: 423 Member
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    I'm more concerned that you were driving after your brain left your body from wine....
  • jennifer_a00
    jennifer_a00 Posts: 186 Member
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    I don't want to sound mean, but it could have been worse, you could have got a DUI for driving around tipsy. As for your binge, sometimes it happens, but what is important is what you do the next day. It's a process, and if you keep working at it, you can get to your goal still!
  • hubn8147
    hubn8147 Posts: 110 Member
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    Nobody is perfect! Right now, you need to forgive yourself and move forward. Never give up!
  • SonicDeathMonkey80
    SonicDeathMonkey80 Posts: 4,489 Member
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    I don't want to sound mean, but it could have been worse, you could have got a DUI for driving around tipsy. As for your binge, sometimes it happens, but what is important is what you do the next day. It's a process, and if you keep working at it, you can get to your goal still!

    Or, you know, killed someone.
  • csl5588
    csl5588 Posts: 4
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    Let me clarify I was not drunk. When I said my brain left my body I was referring to my self control regarding food. I think 2 glasses of red wine over a couple hours and 3500 calories is pretty reasonable…
  • jennifer_a00
    jennifer_a00 Posts: 186 Member
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    I don't want to sound mean, but it could have been worse, you could have got a DUI for driving around tipsy. As for your binge, sometimes it happens, but what is important is what you do the next day. It's a process, and if you keep working at it, you can get to your goal still!

    Or, you know, killed someone.

    Yes. This.
  • ejbraun
    ejbraun Posts: 93 Member
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    I'm more concerned that you were driving after your brain left your body from wine....

    I am glad i wasn't the only one to think this.

    Binges happen; drunk driving shouldn't.
  • skullshank
    skullshank Posts: 4,324 Member
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    I don't want to sound mean, but it could have been worse, you could have killed a family

    FIFY


    i tend to want to eat all teh things when i have restricted in the past.
    if you allow yourself to eat the things you love in moderation, you may be less likely to go crazy. IIFYM
  • Veil5577
    Veil5577 Posts: 868 Member
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    I've had worse binges. It happens. Today is a new day, learn a lesson from yesterday and try not to repeat the mistake if you can.
  • Ulwaz
    Ulwaz Posts: 380 Member
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    im a bit more alarmed you drove while you'd been drinking rather than eating bad food
    We are human, we all eat badly from time too time!
    relax, today is a new day

    But dont drink and drive, your putting yourself and other people in danger
  • DivineChoices
    DivineChoices Posts: 193 Member
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    I think you're eating WAY too little, which caused your binge. Are you eating your exercise calories back? Cause your OP doesn't sound like you are.

    I did a quick calculation here: http://scoobysworkshop.com/calorie-calculator/ and with 3-5 hours per week of moderate exercise you're TDEE is 2280. To lose 1 lb a week, you should be eating 1780 (without eating your exercise calories back).

    As to the binge, today is a new day. Take your lumps regarding any gains and move forward. There is NO point to "fast for a few days" to compensate for the damage you did. It's done. Move on.

    If drinking alcohol causes your brain to leave your body, I wonder why you'd still want to drink. Don't use alcohol as an excuse for doing whatever you want. Yes it can hinder judgement, BUT it doesn't flat out override your common sense. Next time settle for a normal sized glass of wine and leave the food alone.
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
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    This is why I eat in moderation. If I want something, I fit it in my calories. If it doesn't fit in my calories I might slighly alter my next day.
    But I've made it work and I'm happy.
    When I DO NOT allow myself something.... well the instant that I DO get my hands on it I pretty much leave a crime scene from my rabid consumption of it.

    Also I make a point not to get behind the wheel after one drink.
    You might want to do the same.
  • Capt_Inzane
    Capt_Inzane Posts: 733 Member
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    I don't want to sound mean, but it could have been worse, you could have got a DUI for driving around tipsy. As for your binge, sometimes it happens, but what is important is what you do the next day. It's a process, and if you keep working at it, you can get to your goal still!

    Or, you know, killed someone.

    My thoughts completely...
    I quit reading after your post because at least someone said it.

    You're worried about what you ate when you admitted you were tipsy then on top of that got more alcohol and drove..

    Please just deactivate your account...
  • JTick
    JTick Posts: 2,131 Member
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    Let me clarify I was not drunk. When I said my brain left my body I was referring to my self control regarding food. I think 2 glasses of red wine over a couple hours and 3500 calories is pretty reasonable…

    You said you were pretty tipsy. You know what that means? Stay off the roads.
  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
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    Let me clarify I was not drunk. When I said my brain left my body I was referring to my self control regarding food. I think 2 glasses of red wine over a couple hours and 3500 calories is pretty reasonable…

    Just as an FYI -

    A serving of wine is 5 oz. A heavy pour is easily 1.5-2X that. So, in theory, it's possible that you had 3 or more serving sizes of wine.