More insecure after weight loss?

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Cookie_4
Cookie_4 Posts: 152 Member
in Motivation and Support
Hey, everyone. I don't really understand it but the more weight I lose, the more insecure I feel about myself. I used to laugh loudly, go out all the time, chat with anyone and everyone and "werk" the outfits I wore when I was 20 lbs heavier. Now, I've noticed I'm more quiet/shy, stay home more often and don't think I look good in anything even though I see positive physical changes (e.g. a smaller waist, etc).

Im 5'8" and would like to get to 145-150 but everytime I hit 158, something mentally happens and I lose all motivation and gain weight back. I'd really like to get over this hurdle.

Has anyone ever gone through something like this or supported someone who felt this way? Besides seeking therapy, all advice and thoughts are welcomed

Replies

  • asia1967
    asia1967 Posts: 707 Member
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    This has happened to me in the past. I hide and still do to some degree behind my weight. Though I am nowhere near my ideal weight. Keep trying and ask yourself why you think you might be sabotaging yourself. After all it is not just how other people see us, but how we see ourselves that matter. Just my opinion for what it is worth.
  • Transatlantic20145
    Transatlantic20145 Posts: 94
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    Hey, everyone. I don't really understand it but the more weight I lose, the more insecure I feel about myself. I used to laugh loudly, go out all the time, chat with anyone and everyone and "werk" the outfits I wore when I was 20 lbs heavier. Now, I've noticed I'm more quiet/shy, stay home more often and don't think I look good in anything even though I see positive physical changes (e.g. a smaller waist, etc).

    Im 5'8" and would like to get to 145-150 but everytime I hit 158, something mentally happens and I lose all motivation and gain weight back. I'd really like to get over this hurdle.

    Has anyone ever gone through something like this or supported someone who felt this way? Besides seeking therapy, all advice and thoughts are welcomed

    Firstly you look so pretty! Secondly, my guess is that it's because you've been putting a lot more thought to your weight than you did before you were losing weight. I haven't gone through this as I haven't lost weight, but I am very self conscious about my body. I just live with it I guess. Maybe do something beauty-related self-care like a nice bath or such.
  • Cookie_4
    Cookie_4 Posts: 152 Member
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    This has happened to me in the past. I hide and still do to some degree behind my weight. Though I am nowhere near my ideal weight. Keep trying and ask yourself why you think you might be sabotaging yourself. After all it is not just how other people see us, but how we see ourselves that matter. Just my opinion for what it is worth.

    I'm not sure why I'm sabotaging myself but have been working to it the past few months. HOW did you end up getting over it?
  • Cookie_4
    Cookie_4 Posts: 152 Member
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    Firstly you look so pretty! Secondly, my guess is that it's because you've been putting a lot more thought to your weight than you did before you were losing weight. I haven't gone through this as I haven't lost weight, but I am very self conscious about my body. I just live with it I guess. Maybe do something beauty-related self-care like a nice bath or such.

    Thank you so much, but it's really just the angle of the picture that makes it look better :flowerforyou:
  • asia1967
    asia1967 Posts: 707 Member
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    First of all. Take a compliment when it comes your way. It will help to build yourself esteem. ( You sound just like I use to. I know it is difficult) I'm still a work in progress. But the first thing I had to do was to tell myself what I would tell a friend/family member. That you are worth this, that you are a good person etc. Sometimes we know these things and can tell other people, but we don't treat ourselves as kindly.
    Try and take everything with a grain of salt, and take baby steps forward. That is what I have been trying, that way it seems easier and more obtainable. Hope this helps. If you want to talk more I here. Just add me as a friend.
  • coconutfox
    coconutfox Posts: 23 Member
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    Hey hun, I think I have the same problem! I think it's because you notice your weight more now, when I was 20lbs heavier I didn't realise and I didn't think I was a big as I was. Now I'm slimmer I'm always looking at my figure and thinking 'I wish I was smaller'. I found that looking at old pictures of myself really helped to see the big difference losing weight has made :D
  • 1saturn
    1saturn Posts: 95 Member
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    Hey, everyone. I don't really understand it but the more weight I lose, the more insecure I feel about myself. I used to laugh loudly, go out all the time, chat with anyone and everyone and "werk" the outfits I wore when I was 20 lbs heavier. Now, I've noticed I'm more quiet/shy, stay home more often and don't think I look good in anything even though I see positive physical changes (e.g. a smaller waist, etc).

    Im 5'8" and would like to get to 145-150 but everytime I hit 158, something mentally happens and I lose all motivation and gain weight back. I'd really like to get over this hurdle.

    Has anyone ever gone through something like this or supported someone who felt this way? Besides seeking therapy, all advice and thoughts are welcomed

    Hey!
    Yes it's normal. I do the exact same thing and know quite a lot of people who feel the same way. I think it's often because we forget that we can't actually change our body shapes. That weight loss doesn't mean we will be skinny or lose our problem areas. It sure helps but it's not magic and we still have our issues. I also get more critical, because I am working hard to achieve something I want a better result. When I tend to be more carefree with my eating and exercise I sometimes feel better! Because I'm not too bad, considering I'm making no effort.
  • Lizzy622
    Lizzy622 Posts: 3,705 Member
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    Two thoughts as others said you have become more self aware or you hid behind the weight (fat jolly stereotype). As far as sabotage - do NOT look at that number as a finish line but only another goal or step. You should never be finished improving yourself either by getting stronger and healthier or smarter and more confident. YES you can do it.
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,742 Member
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    Maybe you are just having a difficult time adjusting to the new you. With time, you may become more comfortable with yourself again.
  • Cookie_4
    Cookie_4 Posts: 152 Member
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    Thank you for all the replies. I really wish I didn't make it so difficult. I just need to figure out how to get over this mental block because I know I am able to do it but I make it so hard!

    So basically, give it time?

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