anyone else have a thinner partner ?

iheartfruits
iheartfruits Posts: 15 Member
in Motivation and Support
Hey Ya'll!

My name is Esma and im a Yo Yo dieter.

Facts:
I have recently started the Insanity challange. I am up to Week 2.
Getting married May 2015 in Fiji.
My weight is 64 kilos. My parters weight is 62 kilos.
I LOVE chocolate too much.
I live with my partner.

Ok so with all that said, we have a pre wedding party this year in October and I have decided to make a change now (1year before the actual wedding) and i always thought i would be a disciplined bride_to_be and loose weight happily and gracefully before my big day. After all isnt this the best motivator? I was wrong. I am stressed and can not focus. I have been eating chocolate for comfort and yelling at my partner to add some muscle and bulk up. I say this to him because i want the illusion that i am smaller than him. He is so thin that it make me look huge. My mum warned me this would happen, infact i think she is the reason i feel negative right now. I keep picturing us in fiji with the beautiful beaches and my body is super fat. My partner isnt helping either, he thinks i eat too much but he buys choc and other junk food for himself. He has more will power than me so he buys the stuff and it lasts a few days in the pantry, when i see it there for a few days my mind works overtime, i try get him to eat it but he says not now- dont feel like it, then when my will power fails and i eat it, he looks for it and i get yelled at for eating the stupid thing. This cycle continues to happen. Ive asked him to hide it from me but his not interested. He thinks i look fine the way i am but he wont be saying that if i stopped trying to take care of myself.

Anyway enough about my fears. I need motivation to keep going with insanity and not only that, i need to stop eating choc and stop stress eating. Does anyone else feel they are huge in their relationship

Please add me for support. I dont have many friends or family to train with or talk with for encouragement.

Thanks x

Replies

  • aledba
    aledba Posts: 564 Member
    You contradict yourself left, right and centre. I don't think any of this is about your relationship - it all sounds like an excuse. You may want to speak to a nutritionist or dietician. Hire a trainer. Do some research. Eat lean proteins and lots of veggies. Drink water. Lift weights. Repeat.
  • lisalsd1
    lisalsd1 Posts: 1,519 Member
    Sorry...I had to google how much 64 kilos is in 'merican. How tall are you if 141 pounds is "super fat?"
  • iheartfruits
    iheartfruits Posts: 15 Member
    I weigh 64 kilos which is 141.096 in pounds. 165 cm which is 5.41338583 feet. I know i am not fat or obese. I only want to loose 4 kilos to feel good and look slimmer than the fiancee!
  • iheartfruits
    iheartfruits Posts: 15 Member
    Of course its an excuse ! Thats why I am on myfitnesspal. Doesn't everyone have some sort of excuse and need support to dig deeper (totally quoted SHAUN T!).
  • AllTehBeers
    AllTehBeers Posts: 5,030 Member
    Uhm he weighs 2 kilos less than you?
    My girlfriend was literally half of me when i was at my biggest.
    I have no idea what this thread i about.
  • healthygreek
    healthygreek Posts: 2,137 Member
    Decide on a calorie goal that will lose you a 1/2 pound a week, weigh all your food on a scale and log every bite.
    You already workout so go to it and before you know those 4 kilos will be gone!
    Allow yourself a portion of chocolate every day and make sure you eat enough so as not to binge on chocolate.
    A wedding in Fiji!!!!!!!!
    You can do it!
    And congratulations!
  • perseverance14
    perseverance14 Posts: 1,364 Member
    Buy some really good high % cocoa dark chocolate and have 1 piece per day. Get some chocolate flavored protein powder, that will help with the craving and keep you more full.
  • Barbellarella_
    Barbellarella_ Posts: 454 Member
    Lol I could hardly get through your post, so I'll just answer your title.

    Yes, I have a "thinner" partner, but I beat him in the sexy department, so were even :drinker:
  • iheartfruits
    iheartfruits Posts: 15 Member
    Thanks people, cant wait for FIJI ! Loving some of your responses, will def try control choc with dark choc, very good idea !!! (I hate the taste but I guess my taste buds will adapt).

    My partner is the same height as me and he LOOKS way thinner than he weighs, I guess it just looks funny when the gal is a little heavier. Paranoid much - YES I AM HENCE WHY I WANNA LOOK SMALLER!!!
  • kirili3
    kirili3 Posts: 244 Member
    You sound very, very tense! If being tense makes you want to binge, maybe focus on doing some meditation to make you less tense. Focus on your breath, when you feel your mind wandering then refocus on your breath (without being mad at yourself for your mind wandering). Keep going for up to 30 minutes if you can, starting with five minutes and slowly building up.

    Honestly, maybe you're getting so focused on the weight and appearance because you don't want to think about the bigger issues? Marriage is a big deal. Maybe worth thinking about those kinds of issues too. I use food as a comfort but also as a distraction. I'd rather think about my next meal than anything serious.
  • paymentm
    paymentm Posts: 105 Member
    My boyfriend is 6'2" and weighs 130lbs. I am 6 inches shorter and 40 pounds heavier. He supports me with my weight loss goals but in the end he doesn't care what I look like and likes me for me. If you are starting fights over such a small amount of weight there must be something else going on.
  • yellowlemoned
    yellowlemoned Posts: 335 Member
    Your post is a little all over the place, but I'll try my best to be helpful.

    I'm 5'4" and weight 230lbs my boyfriend (who is 6 years younger as well) is 6'1" and weight 198 so I can definitely shed some much needed light on this situation.

    First of all, you are not "super fat." Not even close. You are possibly a little over weight or you could very well be perfectly average.

    Secondly, if you do want to lose weight, which is sounds like you do, you have to learn some self control over your eating. Yoyo dieting and eating chocolate because it's sat there for 2 days is not the way to get in shape.

    Third, find a compromise with your husband. Will he eat the 90 calorie snack packs of chocolates and cookies? If not, can he get a box to store them in so that they aren't sitting on the shelf tempting you? Better yet, how about a lock box so they you legitimately can't get to them?

    Fourth, exercise! Walking, running, jogging, cardio of any sort, paired with some weights for toning will get your body to where you would like it to be before your wedding. Ask if your husband will join you. Make it something you can do together to blow off steam from work, wedding planning, recent arguments, or life in general. Don't turn it into a competition, and don't push him to bulk up for your sake. Also, consider yoga or meditation. You sound horribly stressed and I'm sure that's playing a huge part in all of this.

    Last, but most certainly not least, your husband is marrying you for you who are right now. He doesn't care if he's 2 kilos smaller than you, and you shouldn't either. He loves you for who you are as a person. When your stressing out, having a bad day, or as I like to call it "being a girl about things" just remember he fell in love with you and try to be the person that he knows you are. Likewise, you should, and I think you do, love him for who he is. Take time to sit down and talk through all the arguments you've been having and find out what the real problem is before it affects your relationship.

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