Too fat to leave the house

24explorergirl
24explorergirl Posts: 9 Member
in Motivation and Support
Currently weighing 196, have gained 15 pounds in just over two weeks from starting drinking again. I struggle with both my weight and alcoholism so looking for support on both of these things.
I lost over 70 pounds over last year and in february I was pretty much at my goal weight and feeling really positive about everything and in control. I guess I got comfortable and thought I could drink socially to have fun. As I've began drinking again my weight has been going up and up without me really noticing for a while but now I feel I'm back at where I started and I feel SO disappointed in myself. I can't believe i've let this happen to myself again and I'm struggling to even leave the house today.

Things have really hit home after my dad telling me I have gained weight and that he's worried about me as when I gain weight it leads to depression which results in me not leaving the house and thus drinking to make myself feel better. I am determined to not go down that road again and can't wait to shake off this weight but right now I feel so embarrassed that I've let this happen again... I'm really beginning to feel myself spiral into self hatred when what I need to be doing is taking control and fighting it...

I need to sort this for myself and for my boyfriend as he doesn't want to hear me complain and hate myself the whole time.

Replies

  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    are you getting treatment for your alcoholism? i think that needs to be your first step.
  • tiggsnanny
    tiggsnanny Posts: 366 Member
    aww chin up chook :smile: I can't help you with the drinking problem, I don't drink. But, we're all in here to motivate each other. I'm rubbish at diets, but you have obviously already cracked it losing 70 pounds last year :flowerforyou: well done.

    Send me an f/r if you want to :happy: I'll try and help as much as I can xx
  • Papa_Grande
    Papa_Grande Posts: 63 Member
    I tried for years (off and on) to drink "socially" .....After many brutal lessons, I realized I had to give it up. Period. Not easy, at all, but it CAN be done....If you're serious,

    There are a lot of women in recovery here, if you're serious.

    Put "recovery" in your topic title....post a photo, tell the world a little about you on your profile....Ask for help, you'll get it.


    Good luck.....You can do it.
  • 24explorergirl
    24explorergirl Posts: 9 Member
    I'm not getting treatment as such I'm just stopping as it hasn't become so much of a big deal yet that I'm drinking every day.. I'm trying to hit the nail on the head before it becomes a problem again.

    You're right I can't drink socially and I definitely am serious about giving it up. Before I started drinking again 'socially' I would say how I was glad I'd realised I can't drink at this point in my life, so its obvious I need to stop and I have, I haven't drank since Friday now. Alcohol is the only thing that's denting my progress and setting me back to where I was before so I'd be stupid not to give it up. Its just maintaining that and not being tempted to get drunk when everyone else is drinking. But I MUCH prefer being smaller and feeling hot lol

    I just uploaded a photo of myself from right now (cringing but hopefully it will motivate me further) and put some stuff on my profile. Not sure how to change the topic title now though?

    Thank you for all your kind words and motivation I'm actually already starting to feel better and more capable.
  • elliej
    elliej Posts: 466 Member
    You are certainly not too fat to leave the house, from your pic you're a lovely looking girl. You definitely need to see a therapist about your bad relationship with food and alcohol. I really hope you have the courage to get yourself healthy. You only get one body in this life!
  • Papa_Grande
    Papa_Grande Posts: 63 Member
    Good start!

    You look great, by the way.....Now, leave the house!

    By the way, I meant start a new topic with "woman seeking female friends in recovery" or whatever....You'll get a bunch.

    Keep in touch, let me know how you're doing. :drinker: (Ginger ale)

    You can do this thing....Believe it.
  • cebreisch
    cebreisch Posts: 1,340 Member
    First off, I think you're very pretty.

    I see a therapist about my food addiction, and it could be that the alcohol and the food issues are related.

    Please don't let your weight keep you from going out. I remember stopping by to see a friend once, and she hid in her bedroom while my husband and I spoke with her husband in the kitchen. She said she was too embarrassed to come out because she'd gained weight. I told her it didn't matter to me what size she was - particularly since I had gained weight too.

    Some of what's in the past needs to stay in the past. Don't let those feelings of "but I gained it all back" fester. It is what it is. It happened. As of March 2013 I had lost 141 pounds. Over the last year, I gained about 75 of it back. It happened. As much as I wish I could turn back the clock, I can't.

    Life has no "Undo" button (as much as I'd REALLY like for it to have one). SO, we begin again, and hopefully learn from past experience.

    You can do it.
  • snowflake954
    snowflake954 Posts: 8,399 Member
    It's time to really decide----alcohol or a bright future. I would say you can't have both. When you go out with friends tell them you'll drive and can't drink, or use other stategies to not drink. I also vote for consuling, since this is hard to do on your own. You need the support. I wish you well, and you are getting some good advice on here. Best. :smile:
  • BoatsnHose
    BoatsnHose Posts: 120 Member
    The most important part is to get clean. I used to shoot up heroin and oxycontin and checked into rehab immediately after graduating college. Been clean for 3 years and it is the best decision I have ever made.

    You can do it if you put your mind to it.
  • JSE81
    JSE81 Posts: 114 Member
    I cant drink socially and lose weight. I found it impossible. I drink very occasionally now and when I do I make sure it's a memorable night and 'worth' it. Then it's back to routine of healthy eating and exercise.

    All the best. We are here for you.
  • Angold83
    Angold83 Posts: 62 Member
    I think it may be time to look a bit further afield for support. You need to find your self worth again. Great work on losing 70lbs last year, 15lbs is nothing in comparison to that and you can lose it again. You are an attractive women and you need to start believing that. I want to wish you all the best for the rest of journey :flowerforyou:
  • 24explorergirl
    24explorergirl Posts: 9 Member
    I have seen therapists before and feel that I have all the tools to help myself. I find it upsets the right now if I go over the past too much and I've spent so long analysing the past that for me to live in the present is much more healing and helps my progress more.
    cebreisch, I wish life had an undo button too! But I always find that things do happen for a reason and it makes us the people we are today that we've gone through those struggles

    Thank you so much to everyone that's replied, I was really feeling so out of control and defeated yesterday but I've got up today with my usual mindset that I can do it and found the scales are already going down so hopefully a lot of what I'm feeling is bloatedness from the alcohol so I'm jut drinking a lot of water trying to flush it all out ! It feels so much better to be in control of my body, this community is a huge help so thank you all again.

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