Do I have a problem?

dpr73 · June 2014

I have lost a lot of weight since going to college (a little more than 60lbs). I started off just reducing portions but eventually went to counting. I lost about 10lbs past my goal on the switch to maintenance and now I'm at about 140lbs. Some people have called me too thin now but every time I look in the mirror I am extremely pleased with my appearance. But now I am just so scared that I have some kind of issue that I'm not seeing how I really look. My parents say I look fine but could stand to gain some weight if I wanted. But I honestly don't want to gain anything, just stay put. My little brother is about 20lbs more than me but he has a good amount of muscle and plays a sport (college recruit) he's also an inch taller than me. My other bro is about 180 and 2 inches taller than me, he was a college athlete as well. For some reason I keep telling myself I should be near their weight but on the same token I like how I look. The thing is, I also keep telling myself I have an eatin issue. Does it seem this way? Here's what I eat in a day (not sure of cals because I don't count anymore):
-breakfast: 1c yogurt, 1c cereal of some kind, banana/berries OR an egg and toast with maybe some cheese and a fruit
-snack (occasionally): an orange or banana or Graham cracker or yogurt etc.
-lunch: sandwich with cheese and lean meat with a tomato and a side of maybe yogurt or pudding or fruit
-snack: one beer or a healthy snack of fruit or PB and Graham cracker etc..
-dinner: a serving or two of lean protein (today I had two slice of meat loaf), a starch serving, and veggies (follow clean plate method so quarter plate protein quarter starch and half veggie)
-dessert: fruit salad or other fruit maybe a cookie (just one) or other sweet. I try to keep this to one portion though.

Sometimes I feel simultaneously extremely full (in the afternoons after my lunch) and also somewhat tired with this amount of food. Not absolutely run down but just tired like I should probably relax for a little. I am often fighting with myself on whether i am eating the right amount or too little or too much even though I am never starved and usually perfectly satisfied. But something still comes to mind telling me to have something. I don't know how to deal with that. I am 19 male and 140, 5'7...I workout by lifting weights between 30-45 minutes 5x a week and I usually will go out fishing or play basketball or football in my free time as well.

So do I have an eating problem? Should I be eating more? I haven't lost weight but I am really scared of losing anymore weight but I also want to make sure I stay in this current weight range. Do you have any words to set my mind at ease?

k0lie · June 2014

I think the real question is: do you feel like you have a problem? What I mean by that is: do you feel guilty when you eat more food than that or skip a workout? Do thought of what you eat, what your weigh or how you look consume your life every day?

It seems as though you've been giving a lot of thought to your food intake and weight. There are a few things within this post I consider "warning signs" of sorts... you compare your body to others and "feel like you should weigh the same as them," you are concerned enough about having a problem with food that you've asked for advice, and you're concerned with how your parents and other perceive your weight loss. That being said, having an awareness about your food intake isn't inherently a bad thing, it only becomes one when you feel out of control or have concerns over your mental state due to your desire to lose weight.

From what you've listed as your food and the stats you gave regarding your height and weight, I'd say your food intake sound healthy. Having a problem with food is more than eating too little, it's having a problem with the way you THINK about food. It should be important to you to eat healthily, but not the most important thing in your life. If your relationships, performance in class, energy levels or mental health are suffering negative effects based on your food consumption, then I'd say you might want to speak with a professional about how you view food and weight.

dpr73 · June 2014

I am just someone who becomes concerned about a lot of things. In terms of relationships and performance in school, I don't think either was an issue. I have some good friends especially my brothers, my personality is the same, as I was near a 4.0 in freshman year. However, I do kind of think a lot about my weight/appearance. I don't feel guilty about my food and know full and well to not lose weight. The same way I become concerned about how I look, I will often vascillate between thinking I have a problem and realizing that there's absolutely nothing wrong. Again none of this has effected me or my personality. I think I just need an outside opinion on whether my food intake is healthy, for some reason or another I convince myself I need to eat more but can't really bring myself to do it as I am never hungry enough for it throughout the day and I'm not losing weight.
I am really only concerned with what others think because some people randomly offered their opinions on my weight loss. One friend told me I wouldn't be able to get a date this way (which is interesting because when I was overweight and couldn't run a mile I never got that kind of comment). My grandmother said I need to put meat on my bones and tries to force me to eat more (she's obese though so I can't take her advice too well). I asked my parents because I wanted an honest opinion and they seemed fine with me, my mom actually tries to mimic my eating habits to "get to a healthy weight". So I think at least on this front I've been a little to sensitive to what people say.

I think the real question is: do you feel like you have a problem? What I mean by that is: do you feel guilty when you eat more food than that or skip a workout? Do thought of what you eat, what your weigh or how you look consume your life every day?

It seems as though you've been giving a lot of thought to your food intake and weight. There are a few things within this post I consider "warning signs" of sorts... you compare your body to others and "feel like you should weigh the same as them," you are concerned enough about having a problem with food that you've asked for advice, and you're concerned with how your parents and other perceive your weight loss. That being said, having an awareness about your food intake isn't inherently a bad thing, it only becomes one when you feel out of control or have concerns over your mental state due to your desire to lose weight.

From what you've listed as your food and the stats you gave regarding your height and weight, I'd say your food intake sound healthy. Having a problem with food is more than eating too little, it's having a problem with the way you THINK about food. It should be important to you to eat healthily, but not the most important thing in your life. If your relationships, performance in class, energy levels or mental health are suffering negative effects based on your food consumption, then I'd say you might want to speak with a professional about how you view food and weight.

mccindy72 · June 2014

I have lost a lot of weight since going to college (a little more than 60lbs). I started off just reducing portions but eventually went to counting. I lost about 10lbs past my goal on the switch to maintenance and now I'm at about 140lbs. Some people have called me too thin now but every time I look in the mirror I am extremely pleased with my appearance. But now I am just so scared that I have some kind of issue that I'm not seeing how I really look. My parents say I look fine but could stand to gain some weight if I wanted. But I honestly don't want to gain anything, just stay put. My little brother is about 20lbs more than me but he has a good amount of muscle and plays a sport (college recruit) he's also an inch taller than me. My other bro is about 180 and 2 inches taller than me, he was a college athlete as well. For some reason I keep telling myself I should be near their weight but on the same token I like how I look. The thing is, I also keep telling myself I have an eatin issue. Does it seem this way? Here's what I eat in a day (not sure of cals because I don't count anymore):
-breakfast: 1c yogurt, 1c cereal of some kind, banana/berries OR an egg and toast with maybe some cheese and a fruit
-snack (occasionally): an orange or banana or Graham cracker or yogurt etc.
-lunch: sandwich with cheese and lean meat with a tomato and a side of maybe yogurt or pudding or fruit
-snack: one beer or a healthy snack of fruit or PB and Graham cracker etc..
-dinner: a serving or two of lean protein (today I had two slice of meat loaf), a starch serving, and veggies (follow clean plate method so quarter plate protein quarter starch and half veggie)
-dessert: fruit salad or other fruit maybe a cookie (just one) or other sweet. I try to keep this to one portion though.

Sometimes I feel simultaneously extremely full (in the afternoons after my lunch) and also somewhat tired with this amount of food. Not absolutely run down but just tired like I should probably relax for a little. I am often fighting with myself on whether i am eating the right amount or too little or too much even though I am never starved and usually perfectly satisfied. But something still comes to mind telling me to have something. I don't know how to deal with that. I am 19 male and 140, 5'7...I workout by lifting weights between 30-45 minutes 5x a week and I usually will go out fishing or play basketball or football in my free time as well.

So do I have an eating problem? Should I be eating more? I haven't lost weight but I am really scared of losing anymore weight but I also want to make sure I stay in this current weight range. Do you have any words to set my mind at ease?

Have you checked with an actual doctor about your concerns? It sounds like you were counting calories for a while; are you doing that still? Are you at a maintenance count for your weight/height? These are all questions you need to answer. You should be eating back your exercise calories, and it doesn't look like you are doing that.

k0lie · June 2014

I'm not an expert at all, but I think your food intake sounds very healthy. If you're super concerned, you could see if your school has a nutritionist you can meet with to discuss the healthiest diet for someone of your size and activity level.

I only brought up the points I did because in the past I've struggled with negative thoughts surrounding food, my body and my weight. It began for me not long after I started college (I'm about to graduate now) and those negative thoughts that I never thought much of slowly spiraled into an obsession over food and what I was eating that required therapy and a lot of positive thought work to overcome. I think you're doing the right thing by staying aware of your diet and your thoughts surrounding food.

Feel free to add me as a friend or send me a message if you want to talk more!

dpr73 · June 2014

I went to a nutritionist on campus and we were working back to maintenance calories but stopped because I thought I could hit maintenance easier by going by how I felt after eating. I did that and almost immediately stopped the weight loss. I was hitting about 2100 when I stopped counting, I have loosened up even more and estimate around 2100-2400 daily but I really not sure at all about that figure as I'm not actually counting. No, I don't explicitly eat back exercise cals, never have...if I am hungry after a workout I'll eat but often times I'm just full afterwards.

I have lost a lot of weight since going to college (a little more than 60lbs). I started off just reducing portions but eventually went to counting. I lost about 10lbs past my goal on the switch to maintenance and now I'm at about 140lbs. Some people have called me too thin now but every time I look in the mirror I am extremely pleased with my appearance. But now I am just so scared that I have some kind of issue that I'm not seeing how I really look. My parents say I look fine but could stand to gain some weight if I wanted. But I honestly don't want to gain anything, just stay put. My little brother is about 20lbs more than me but he has a good amount of muscle and plays a sport (college recruit) he's also an inch taller than me. My other bro is about 180 and 2 inches taller than me, he was a college athlete as well. For some reason I keep telling myself I should be near their weight but on the same token I like how I look. The thing is, I also keep telling myself I have an eatin issue. Does it seem this way? Here's what I eat in a day (not sure of cals because I don't count anymore):
-breakfast: 1c yogurt, 1c cereal of some kind, banana/berries OR an egg and toast with maybe some cheese and a fruit
-snack (occasionally): an orange or banana or Graham cracker or yogurt etc.
-lunch: sandwich with cheese and lean meat with a tomato and a side of maybe yogurt or pudding or fruit
-snack: one beer or a healthy snack of fruit or PB and Graham cracker etc..
-dinner: a serving or two of lean protein (today I had two slice of meat loaf), a starch serving, and veggies (follow clean plate method so quarter plate protein quarter starch and half veggie)
-dessert: fruit salad or other fruit maybe a cookie (just one) or other sweet. I try to keep this to one portion though.

Sometimes I feel simultaneously extremely full (in the afternoons after my lunch) and also somewhat tired with this amount of food. Not absolutely run down but just tired like I should probably relax for a little. I am often fighting with myself on whether i am eating the right amount or too little or too much even though I am never starved and usually perfectly satisfied. But something still comes to mind telling me to have something. I don't know how to deal with that. I am 19 male and 140, 5'7...I workout by lifting weights between 30-45 minutes 5x a week and I usually will go out fishing or play basketball or football in my free time as well.

So do I have an eating problem? Should I be eating more? I haven't lost weight but I am really scared of losing anymore weight but I also want to make sure I stay in this current weight range. Do you have any words to set my mind at ease?

Have you checked with an actual doctor about your concerns? It sounds like you were counting calories for a while; are you doing that still? Are you at a maintenance count for your weight/height? These are all questions you need to answer. You should be eating back your exercise calories, and it doesn't look like you are doing that.

nxd10 · June 2014

Check your BMI. It is not a perfect measure, but it will certainly identify an underweight individual. People who are anxious and conscientious - and it sounds like you are - do tend to be prone to eating problems. But it sounds like you are more worried about having an eating problem.

Lots of young men are very thin at this age. Both my sons - who bracket your age - are very, very slim but have lots of muscle, no eating issues, and no guilt about eating. In fact, both are over 6'2" and your weight.

If you're in the healthy range, don't have emotional eating issues, and your parents say you're okay, just relax. Congratulations on your weight loss.

Do I have a problem?

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