Anxiety About Giving Away Old Clothes

GreatDepression
GreatDepression Posts: 347 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
My old trousers and shirts haven't fit for a while but I kept holding on to them. They were getting so large on me that it became uncomfortable to wear. Recently I donated all the clothes to charity and it actually took me weeks to work up the courage. My negative voice kept telling me that I'm going to regain all the weight just like most people and I'll need the clothes again some day. My optimistic voice told me that I needed to burn all bridges to my old ways of living, clothes included.

I know for most of you here it was probably very liberating to get rid of your "fat clothes." For me, it has caused a lot of anxiety. I actually couldn't bring myself to give all the big clothes away. I'm still holding on to a few of the items that are big on me but not as huge as the other pieces.

Replies

  • gingabebe
    gingabebe Posts: 165 Member
    I held on to stuff just in case and ended up gaining it all back and then some. This time I am gladly giving the too big clothes away and not looking back. I think it can set you up for failure.
    Now I am not losing too quickly so I have only went down 2 jeans sizes and many of my shirts still fit. I had some very nice pricey clothing though that I had a hard time with, so I gave them to my sister and told her if they didn't fit her right to give them to someone that could use them. I figured there is no reason to hold onto them. Now when I buy smaller clothes I think about the cost compared to how long I believe I will be in that size. I try to shop sales for that reason.
  • RodaRose
    RodaRose Posts: 9,562 Member
    My old trousers and shirts haven't fit for a while but I kept holding on to them. They were getting so large on me that it became uncomfortable to wear. Recently I donated all the clothes to charity and it actually took me weeks to work up the courage. My negative voice kept telling me that I'm going to regain all the weight just like most people and I'll need the clothes again some day. My optimistic voice told me that I needed to burn all bridges to my old ways of living, clothes included.

    I know for most of you here it was probably very liberating to get rid of your "fat clothes." For me, it has caused a lot of anxiety. I actually couldn't bring myself to give all the big clothes away. I'm still holding on to a few of the items that are big on me but not as huge as the other pieces.

    Do what works for you. Most of us do not need extra anxiety in our lives.
  • SharonNehring
    SharonNehring Posts: 535 Member
    I've been rotating clothes through 2 closets. When I buy a smaller size, the too big ones go into the guest room closet. When I drop another size, the now too big ones go to the guest room and those that were already in the guest room, now 2 sizes too big, get donated.

    I've held on to a couple of shirts, more for sentimental reasons, and most of my T-shirts, as I can do yard work, paint or just sleep in those. It's nice to keep one outfit so that once you reach your goal weight you can compare to where you started from.

    All that said, try not too stress too much over this. If it takes you some time to adjust to the idea of getting rid of your old stuff, then it takes you some time. It definitely takes a while for the mind to catch up to the reality of weight loss. It was hard for me to see the changes initially and even harder to convince myself that this time it's going to "stick" for good.
  • ZombieEarhart
    ZombieEarhart Posts: 320 Member
    Try looking at it another way- those clothes don't fit you any more, they're useless to you. Remember what a chore it was to buy clothes in your old size? And how hard it is to find bigger clothes second hand? Think of how happy someone is going to be to find your old clothes in that charity shop! They may be just the trousers someone needs for a job interview, or shirt to wear to a party. Think of the good they'll do in someone else's life. It may ease some of your anxiety to think about the clothes already belonging to someone else. Good luck and keep doing the great job that's made those clothes too big :)
  • JensRiot
    JensRiot Posts: 24 Member
    I completely understand. I always have a bit of anxiety getting rid of things. One idea is to box up the bigger clothes, label and date them. When you haven't touched them in a year, donate the box(es) without looking inside. No sentiment involved and then you obviously won't need them anymore. Good luck!
  • traceywoody
    traceywoody Posts: 233 Member
    Try looking at it another way- those clothes don't fit you any more, they're useless to you. Remember what a chore it was to buy clothes in your old size? And how hard it is to find bigger clothes second hand? Think of how happy someone is going to be to find your old clothes in that charity shop! They may be just the trousers someone needs for a job interview, or shirt to wear to a party. Think of the good they'll do in someone else's life. It may ease some of your anxiety to think about the clothes already belonging to someone else. Good luck and keep doing the great job that's made those clothes too big :)

    What a wonderful way to think about this. I have just given a lot of my bigger clothes away to charity and I too had some thoughts of, "maybe I should hang on to these", but it did feel very good to give them away. It felt like dumping my old way of life.
  • David_AUS
    David_AUS Posts: 298 Member
    I can relate to your mind set, I am a horder. Letting go of the old clothes was for me a psychological battle as well. I was will over 42 inch waist and squeezing into this size then in denial that I needed 44 inch pants (at least). One thing I know for certain even if I get back to that size again I would be a different person anyhow - one that would not wear necessarily the same style as I did back then. What I did was have a bag which I filled over a week and donated to charity - this made the anxiety of giving these old clothes away more bearable. I would try a pair of pants or shirt on and look in the mirror - if it was obviously too big than into the bag. If I thought I could use a belt to hold the pants up I would wear it that day and give them another round. Generally by the end of the day if I felt myself adjusting the waist band all the time then I would be frustrated enough to donate them away.
  • GreatDepression
    GreatDepression Posts: 347 Member
    By the time I made this thread, I had already donated the clothes but didn't really have much time to process the feelings. I didn't want to give them away because I kept feeling like I'd be fat again someday and will need them. One morning I just threw all the clothes in a bin and drove to a Good Will trying my best to not think about it so much.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,029 Member
    Fear causes lots of people anxiety. Fear of regaining weight is legit since over 90% of dieters do regain weight due to losing weight on programs that weren't sustainable.
    You do have to keep reassuring yourself you're heading the right direction and correct path. It will ALWAYS be that way with one's weight. People who stay lean still have to be aware of how much they eat or just like anyone else, they will gain weight.

    Personally one of the best ways I "freed" myself from holding on to the past is getting rid of some of my old bodybuilding trophies. While they showed I won a category and placed, it DOESN'T reflect what I'm doing now. If I want a new trophy, then I go and do the things I need to do to earn it.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • Aishteru85
    Aishteru85 Posts: 51 Member
    My old trousers and shirts haven't fit for a while but I kept holding on to them. They were getting so large on me that it became uncomfortable to wear. Recently I donated all the clothes to charity and it actually took me weeks to work up the courage. My negative voice kept telling me that I'm going to regain all the weight just like most people and I'll need the clothes again some day. My optimistic voice told me that I needed to burn all bridges to my old ways of living, clothes included.

    I know for most of you here it was probably very liberating to get rid of your "fat clothes." For me, it has caused a lot of anxiety. I actually couldn't bring myself to give all the big clothes away. I'm still holding on to a few of the items that are big on me but not as huge as the other pieces.

    I have trouble parting with my fat clothes as well ...heck I still wear them eventhough I have lost almost 72 pounds. And most of my clothes look extremely baggy, as though I borrowed someone's else's clothes. I would like to do a wardrobe overhaul but I figured If I'm going to lose more weight, maybe I should wait when I reach a certain weight before doing a wardrobe overhaul. I mean its a pain and a waste of money to buy clothes that will only be unwearable half year down the road.... am i the only one feeling this way? am i being cheap?
  • spinneyhex
    spinneyhex Posts: 54 Member
    I just did it one day, gave them all to a very grateful friend. I still have a couple of things that I loved but they can go as well.......when I'm ready :/
  • galprincess
    galprincess Posts: 683 Member
    Ive kept 1 piece of clothing in every size so I can compare and feel good about myself and it does motivate me never to go back but I do think everyone has those doubts about giving away clothes you may need again but let them go and celebrate where you are now
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    you need to teach yourself that you're in control of whether you gain weight back or not.... weight gain does not happen overnight, it's a slow process. You only need one set of clothes. When the set that you have gets too tight, then you go right back to logging all your food and eating at a deficit until they fit you again. If you react to this situation by returning to wearing larger clothes, then that's kind of just giving up... it's a choice you have. You're never going to just wake up and suddenly be more than an entire clothing size bigger... you go through a phase of struggling to get into your current size, and that's when you resolve to change something to reverse the creeping weight gain... whether it's extra workouts, going back to logging consistently, whatever worked to get you thin first time around.
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
    I was the same way. And I did keep gaining it back. Every winter.

    Now with MFP I've stayed in the same weight range for several years, so I'm confident I'm not going to skyrocket back up.

    I finally gave away everything bigger than 2 sizes. And eventually I'll give those away too. I'd like to get down a bit farther too.
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
    By the time I made this thread, I had already donated the clothes but didn't really have much time to process the feelings. I didn't want to give them away because I kept feeling like I'd be fat again someday and will need them. One morning I just threw all the clothes in a bin and drove to a Good Will trying my best to not think about it so much.

    good job. :smile:
  • verptwerp
    verptwerp Posts: 3,628 Member
    By the time I made this thread, I had already donated the clothes but didn't really have much time to process the feelings. I didn't want to give them away because I kept feeling like I'd be fat again someday and will need them. One morning I just threw all the clothes in a bin and drove to a Good Will trying my best to not think about it so much.

    ^

    Awesome job !

    I hesitated to donate clothes because of the $$ factor ....... how could I possibly get rid of things that cost so much, especially coats, jackets, sweaters. But after awhile they start looking like clown clothes ...... not a good look :laugh:

    When I donated, I was happy at the thought that someone else could benefit ....... and I only replaced a few items, with stuff I actually wear LOL

    Each season I go through it all again ..... anything that doesn't thrill me, out it goes ..... it's nice having room in my closet !

    And ...... we're never going back there, so why keep it ?
  • gracie11lexi13
    gracie11lexi13 Posts: 123 Member
    The only clothes i am holding onto are my maternity clothes because I do plan on having more babies. All my bigger clothes i am giving it to cosignment shops so they can sell them for me and then I pick up the money I made and buy me a new wardrobe.
  • HollyDee14
    HollyDee14 Posts: 21 Member
    I can totally relate to this. One of the things that helped me was to donate to a women's shelter. That seemed somehow to make it more meaningful, knowing that women who may be seeking help with nothing but the clothes on their back could be helped by my things. And, maybe, one of them will wear my lucky blazer and it will be lucky enough to get her the job she needs to feed, clothe, and house her children. That visualization helped me to get out of the emotional need to hang onto clothing that no longer fits.

    I am LOVING the idea about the rotating closet-- I plan to use that one going forward. :) Great idea!!
  • Karababy51
    Karababy51 Posts: 124 Member
    A week or so ago, I cleaned out my dresser and closet of all my clothes from the last 27 years and gave them to Goodwill. There were a few things that brought back some wonderful memories of when I had worn them last, like a beautiful two-piece, royal purple brocade suit I'd worn for Easter one year. But, other than those moments of bittersweet nostalgia, I was happy and, well, proud of myself for getting to that point where I could confidently give them away without any fear I was making a mistake. I'm determined to NEVER get that big again.

    I only kept a few things for posterity and comparison, such as one pair of jeans, shorts (I can stand in one leg of them now) and a shirt all in a size when I weighed the most. Plus, I have one tiny, jean skirt from before I gained all the weight I'm hoping to fit into soon. I can zip that sucker up, but it's still a tight fit. I kept my wedding gown too, of course. I still have one daughter or maybe one day a grand-daughter who perhaps might like to wear it one day for their wedding.

    After the Goodwill employee hauled away the six large 30 gallon bags of my donation, I went inside and had a wonderful, gleeful, shopping spree! At the end of the day, I am left with one drawer of clothes that actually fit me now and I'm ecstatic. Yes, it's not much, but I'm still losing weight and I know once I reach my goal, I'm going to have even MORE fun buying an entire NEW wardrobe in celebration. :)
  • cjames010
    cjames010 Posts: 86 Member
    This is hard for me because I had lost 60 pounds in 2011, and by the end of 2013 I gained 25 pounds back. I am not confident that I can keep the weight off for a long period of time.

    I also have a hard time finding jeans because of my pear shape. It's hard to find a fit that will go over my butt AND not leave a gap at my waist.

    Last month we had a garage sale, and I reluctantly put my 10 pairs of old jeans out for sale. Only one of them sold, and I was relieved. I actually put the old jeans back in my closet. I don't know what it'll take for me to let them go.
  • goldfinger88
    goldfinger88 Posts: 686 Member
    I understand your anxiety. I've had it too. At one time I had about four, maybe five large boxes with that many size jeans and pants in each one. I hung on to each box for the longest time. But this last time I determined "would" be the last time and I gave them all away. For one thing, I detest clutter and old clothing that we no longer wear is nothing but clutter and it's also something someone else needs badly and will love to get.

    It's time for you to move on. You choose to maintain or regain. I weigh daily or nearly so and if I see even two pounds creep up, I go to work on getting it right off. You do not have to accept regaining weight. People allow it. Yes, it happens to most everyone because they revert to old habits, bad foods, too much food.

    You choose to be thin or get fat again. Giving away the clothes is a very good thing to do. It's saying "no" to regaining weight and yes to staying slim. Let it go and enjoy where you are.
  • Iwishyouwell
    Iwishyouwell Posts: 1,888 Member
    I kept some of my fat and low weight clothes from years ago. Turned out to be a great thing; when I rebounded, I had something to wear, and now that I'm approaching my previous low weight range, I have something to compare myself to.

    My plan this time around though is to be smaller, by far, than I ever have been. I've given some clothes away but I'm keeping quite a bit around to do before/after pics and comparisons with.

    Then all but a couple pair of jeans, one from my 300+ lbs range and another from my once smallest self, are staying just for posterity. I have no reason to keep the other clothes. I want a brand new day when I hit goal this time.

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