Running Envy

Options
brg020788
brg020788 Posts: 18 Member
in Fitness and Exercise
I recently had a major knee surgery and am unable to run. My co-worker is into running and that is great. But what do I do when that is ALL he talks about? He doesn't just mention his runs, he boasts about them. I am happy for him and proud of his accomplishments as he is someone who lost half of his bodyweight.... but can't he just SHUT UP? Am I wrong to think of him as being insensitive to the fact that running was my lifeline and I am unable to run indefinitely?!

How do I get around this without being a brat?
«1

Replies

  • kr1stadee
    kr1stadee Posts: 1,774 Member
    Options
    I don't think it's possible to ask him to stop being proud of his accomplishments without sounding like a brat. I'm sorry you are out for now, but he isn't.
    I'm sure when you were up and going, you were talking about it.. maybe someone in the office wanted to run but couldn't and was dying to tell you to shut it.

    It's almost like not being allowed to eat sweets because your office-mate is diabetic.
    Sorry!
  • tartansheep
    tartansheep Posts: 122 Member
    Options
    Afraid there doesn't seem to be an easy answer. Counter his brags with brags about your own achievements, perhaps?
  • Shropshire1959
    Shropshire1959 Posts: 982 Member
    Options
    take a gun to work and clean it in front of him .....
  • MB_Positif
    MB_Positif Posts: 8,897 Member
    Options
    You have your running (or lack of it at the moment) and he has his running. They are two separate things. Let him shine in his glory. You'll get back to it. I had a 9 month hiatus from exercise due to illness, brain surgery and recovery. I REALLY missed lifting and running, but as soon as I was cleared I got right back into it and haven't stopped.

    You create your own happiness, don't let your envy of someone else's current success bring you down. Let it fuel you to get back at it as soon as your doctor gives you the go ahead.
  • ew_david
    ew_david Posts: 3,473 Member
    Options
    You're being a brat.
  • JTick
    JTick Posts: 2,131 Member
    Options
    I can sympathize with you - I'm down with an injury right now and haven't been able to run in about six weeks. Sometimes it's hard to log into MFP and see all my friends logging their runs and talking about their races when I've had to keep scratching races back off my calendar. But I AM proud of them and I AM happy for them and I know that they have really worked for this and deserve to have great runs. I'm not going to take my feelings of "it's not fair!" out on them...because when I'm ready to start running again I know that they'll be there liking my activities and telling me great job at races. Until then, just focus on healing and you'll be back running before you know it, and then you can drive him nuts with all your running talk. :laugh:
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    Options
    does he know it upsets you so much that he is proud of his running and likes to talk about it with his colleagues? presumably until you couldnt run you were a willing participant in such conversations?
  • RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle
    RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle Posts: 1,349 Member
    Options
    You just have to be happy for him.

    I just read through a whole thread about push-ups. This is my issue. I have been able to do push-ups all my life, even when I was heavy and pregnant. Now I've been limited to doing wall push-ups and sometimes countertop push-ups. FML:(
    On the other hand, if this is all I have to complain about, then I'm pretty lucky!
  • CaitySins
    CaitySins Posts: 57 Member
    Options
    You could maybe point out that while you're impressed and happy for him it's making you miss running and getting you down. Like you don't have to say tone it down, but maybe pointing out that it's making you upset would cause him to tone it down while in front of you
  • threechins
    threechins Posts: 35 Member
    Options
    Not much sympathy here, is there?

    It might be in the future that you'll look back and think you're a brat. It might have been in the past that others felt you bragging was insensitive. But we live in the present, and in that present you are missing running and he is reminding you of that. I don't think it would be at all unreasonable to simply have a word with your colleague and invite him to think about your feelings. You comment that running was your lifeline; tell him this. No-one would be insensitive around someone who had suffered a major loss, why should this be any different just because it's less obvious or visible.

    Unless there's a sub-text I'm missing he'd probably understand: running is important to both of you, he should understand what it's like to have that taken from you.
  • melaniecheeks
    melaniecheeks Posts: 6,349 Member
    Options
    I'm another one who's out injured at the minute too.

    Instead of moping on the sidelines, or sticking my fingers in my ears going "I dont want to hear!" I've got very involved in the marshalling/ volunteering/ timekeeping etc side of things. Those roles are often undervalued, but they help all those other runners achieve their goals.

    I like to think there's a running community, with a supportive spirit, through good times and bad.
  • dadeys1
    dadeys1 Posts: 40 Member
    Options
    Maybe print out a funny meme mocking his accomplishments. As I always say, "Nothing is too harsh if it's funny."

    1755.jpg
  • ninav1980
    ninav1980 Posts: 514 Member
    Options
    I recently had a major knee surgery and am unable to run. My co-worker is into running and that is great. But what do I do when that is ALL he talks about? He doesn't just mention his runs, he boasts about them. I am happy for him and proud of his accomplishments as he is someone who lost half of his bodyweight.... but can't he just SHUT UP? Am I wrong to think of him as being insensitive to the fact that running was my lifeline and I am unable to run indefinitely?!

    How do I get around this without being a brat?

    try and change the topic and talk about somthing totally unrelated.
  • cossmoss15
    cossmoss15 Posts: 509 Member
    Options
    I was a runner until an injury forced me to quit for good 3 years ago. And I still miss it.
    Everyone gets tired of hearing runners talk. When I was still running my husband would sometimes decline to join us when my running friends were getting together (and not running) just because he wasn't interested in the conversation.
    At this point I think you just have to be polite and listen - you'll luckily be on the other side of the conversation before long and boring others!
  • galprincess
    galprincess Posts: 682 Member
    Options
    I am a believer in honesty I would tell him that you think his accomplishments are amazing and you are proud or whatever but then id say but I find it hard when you talk about running as a runner who is injured it makes me feel very down. you wont sound like a brat
  • maab_connor
    maab_connor Posts: 3,927 Member
    Options
    I recently had a major knee surgery and am unable to run. My co-worker is into running and that is great. But what do I do when that is ALL he talks about? He doesn't just mention his runs, he boasts about them. I am happy for him and proud of his accomplishments as he is someone who lost half of his bodyweight.... but can't he just SHUT UP? Am I wrong to think of him as being insensitive to the fact that running was my lifeline and I am unable to run indefinitely?!

    How do I get around this without being a brat?

    the bolded statement tells me that this has NOTHING to do with him. you're mad b/c you've lost the ability to do something you love. you're in mourning. this is a normal response to that, it's one of the stages of grief. but that doesn't mean that your co-worker is in the wrong.

    work with your PT to find something that you can love just as much. maybe biking, it's wind in your hair, you alone in your head time outside. maybe swimming, b/c you can block out everything around you. maybe weights, taking back control of your body. but there is going to be another outlet.

    it just sucks right now and i'm so sorry.
  • galprincess
    galprincess Posts: 682 Member
    Options
    Raspberry

    I cant do push ups pregnant or not and im envious x
  • stanthom
    stanthom Posts: 13
    Options
    I recently had a major knee surgery and am unable to run. My co-worker is into running and that is great. But what do I do when that is ALL he talks about? He doesn't just mention his runs, he boasts about them. I am happy for him and proud of his accomplishments as he is someone who lost half of his bodyweight.... but can't he just SHUT UP? Am I wrong to think of him as being insensitive to the fact that running was my lifeline and I am unable to run indefinitely?!

    How do I get around this without being a brat?

    I can relate. I used to run and I loved it! Since back surgery, running is no more. I used to feel bitter when I would see friends post their running pictures on FB or I would see friends running and go to their races. It really hurt.

    How did I get over it? Fake it til you make it. Smile and be happy for them even though it hurt so much to know that I couldn't run anymore. Eventually, I became truly happy for them.
  • benaddict
    benaddict Posts: 1,381 Member
    Options
    I've struggled with infertility for over three years now, including four miscarriages. There are lots of people in my life who know how much my husband and I have gone through and how much we want a baby. They still talk about their children or their pregnant relatives, show me pictures of their ultrasounds or baby pictures, talk about their pregnancies, etc. My sister and a friend of ours were both pregnant at the same time last year, and when we'd all get together they'd talk about their symptoms and even complain about being pregnant sometimes. I've never asked anyone to stop talking about it. Some days I'm more emotional than others and I have to go to the restroom and shed a tear or two and then go back to whatever I was doing, and some days I'm capable of real happiness for them. If I can suck it up and let people talk about their pregnancies, babies, children, etc while going through multiple miscarriages and years of infertility, surely it's possible for you to listen to someone talk about running without asking him to stop. I'm sorry to hear about your injury, but I'd suggest finding something else you can do that will bring you a feeling of pride or accomplishment so that you can share your successes and contribute to the conversation instead of just feeling sorry for yourself. Best of luck.
  • RunWinterGarden
    RunWinterGarden Posts: 428 Member
    Options
    I've got a sprained ankle that's killing any chance I have to run right now, I completely get where you are coming from, but you need to just let it go and relax and enjoy what you can.

Categories